Relocating to Thailand

[Ken76]

Hello, I am an openly gay male and looking to retire to Thailand with my boyfriend.  Is Thai people respectful of Americans and gay people.  My boyfriend and I are looking to meet with other gay men in Thailand. Thank you 

[bkkmfj2648]

On 4/4/2025 at 6:44 PM, Ken76 said:

Is Thai people respectful of Americans and gay people.

I would say yes - as long as you respect Thai culture, norms, and their religion.

On 4/4/2025 at 6:44 PM, Ken76 said:

My boyfriend and I are looking to meet with other gay men in Thailand

That should be easy as there are large gay expat communities throughout Thailand, including; Bangkok, Chiang Mai, Pattaya, Phuket, and Hua Hin. 

There are probably also other areas with gay communities.

On 4/4/2025 at 6:44 PM, Ken76 said:

I am an openly gay male and looking to retire to Thailand with my boyfriend.

When do you make the big move to Thailand?

[Olddaddy]

Think about it first 🤔

Sounds like you never been there 

What part of Thailand?

How long have you known your Thai boyfriend?

Are retiring because of your BF ,  is it love or lonilesness your retiring for 

how old are you? Are you too young to retire ?

Can you live the lifestyle,

I couldn't,I get bored after several weeks there 

What will you do everyday there ?

 

 

[fedssocr]

I agree that you should give it a trial run before committing to moving there full time. Do a few months and see if you like the place, culture, tropical climate, etc. 

[khaolakguy]

On 4/4/2025 at 12:44 PM, Ken76 said:

Hello, I am an openly gay male and looking to retire to Thailand with my boyfriend.  Is Thai people respectful of Americans and gay people.  My boyfriend and I are looking to meet with other gay men in Thailand. Thank you 

Doesn't sound like you know much about Thailand or have done much reading on this or other gay Thailand forums.

In these circumstances I wouldn't advise retiring to Thailand as you might become a member of the notorious PFC.

[PeterRS]

7 hours ago, khaolakguy said:

In these circumstances I wouldn't advise retiring to Thailand as you might become a member of the notorious PFC.

To enlighten @Ken76, the PFC stands for the Pattaya Flying Club. No, it does not teach you to fly an aircraft, although some who have participated might have had far too much acohol and assumed they could fly solo. It basically means depression-related suicide by jumping off a balcony.

Generally, I suggest it is near madness to consider retiring anywhere unless you have a pretty good knowledge of the country/area. Just because some countries have a reputation for being gay friendly should not make it the reason for investing in retirement there. I suggest @Olddaddy's earlier post has several very pertinent points you have to consider (although I got the impression from your OP that your boyfriend is not in fact  Thai - if he is, then that changes things somewhat).

There are lots of Americans in Thailand, more than a few are gay and have Thai boyfriends. As a gay couple you will be welcomed, but key to that as @bkkmfj2648 pointed out above is you respecting Thai people, their culture, customs and religion. This is their country - not America. So you have to adapt and respect them rather than the other way around.

It would be interesting to know if you have visited Thailand before - or indeed any Asian country.

[Travelingguy]

I think that you should plan a trip to visit Thailand.  Maybe a few trips at different times of the year.  Do the tourist things.  Do the gay things.  But also go the the markets.  Take the bus/train/subway.  Take a cooking class.  Go to the temples.  Read up about Buddhism and the history of Thailand.  Try to get a feel of the place and then think about whether you want to retire there.  Thailand is a great place to visit.  It might not be your cup of tea for retirement.  

You may figure that out during these visits, but I would bet that you will enjoy the visits even if you decide that you don’t want to retire in Thailand. 

I have no intention of living in Thailand myself, but I would not pass up an opportunity to go back.

[PeterRS]

I am one who has lived in Bangkok for 24 years. But I had visited the city and other parts of Thailand many dozens of times before I took the plunge, as it were. Since I was living in Hong Kong during the 1980s and 1990s, that made it easy for me. By the mid-1990s I realised I wished to remain in Asia for the rest of my life. The only question was: where? Once again I was extremely lucky. The jobs I had been doing took me regularly virtually all over Asia and so I was quickly able to rule out most countries. I had certain criteria - one being it had to  be close to Hong Kong for I did not intend to retire in 2001. I planned to continue running my own small company in Hong Kong even after normal retirement age. So proximity and ease of travel were vital. I narrowed the choice down to two cities in two countries and eventually purchased a small Bangkok condo in mid-1999. While I had intended to rent it out for at least 15 or more years, the Asian Economic Crisis which started in Thailand on 1 July 1997 finally reached Hong Kong in 2000. There followed the worst recession there since WWII. With my company's budgeted income for 2001 and 2002 quickly vanishing, it became cheaper for me to base myself in Bangkok and commute to Hong Kong or wherever work took me each month.

I had done my research and my sums. The one problem I had not factored in was the worldwide recession of 2008 and the resultant crash in interest rates. As Thailand's economy has grown extensively since 1999, everything is a good bit more expensive than I had expected by this stage. But that would almost certainly also be true of most retirement cities/countries.

[Olddaddy]

7 minutes ago, PeterRS said:

I am one who has lived in Bangkok for 24 years. But I had visited the city and other parts of Thailand many dozens of times before I took the plunge, as it were. Since I was living in Hong Kong during the 1980s and 1990s, that made it easy for me. By the mid-1990s I realised I wished to remain in Asia for the rest of my life. The only question was: where? Once again I was extremely lucky. The jobs I had been doing took me regularly virtually all over Asia and so I was quickly able to rule out most countries. I had certain criteria - one being it had to  be close to Hong Kong for I did not intend to retire in 2001. I planned to continue running my own small company in Hong Kong even after normal retirement age. So proximity and ease of travel were vital. I narrowed the choice down to two cities in two countries and eventually purchased a small Bangkok condo in mid-1999. While I had intended to rent it out for at least 15 or more years, the Asian Economic Crisis which started in Thailand on 1 July 1997 finally reached Hong Kong in 2000. There followed the worst recession there since WWII. With my company's budgeted income for 2001 and 2002 quickly vanishing, it became cheaper for me to base myself in Bangkok and commute to Hong Kong or wherever work took me each month.

I had done my research and my sums. The one problem I had not factored in was the worldwide recession of 2008 and the resultant crash in interest rates. As Thailand's economy has grown extensively since 1999, everything is a good bit more expensive than I had expected by this stage. But that would almost certainly also be true of most retirement cities/countries.

So you still live in Bangkok?

 

[PeterRS]

1 hour ago, Olddaddy said:

So you still live in Bangkok?

 

Yes I do.

[zombie]

On 4/4/2025 at 6:44 PM, Ken76 said:

Hello, I am an openly gay male and looking to retire to Thailand with my boyfriend.  Is Thai people respectful of Americans and gay people.  My boyfriend and I are looking to meet with other gay men in Thailand. Thank you 

Yes Thai people are respectful to Americans and gay people.

As others have in effect stated here try as best you can to do your homework: re living and accommodation, health insurance, taxation and all other financial issues.

Accept that things are different usually in a nice way than back home.

If you have sufficient money and health (or health care) plus the right attitude you can have a great time in Thailand!

 

[floridarob]

Before I moved to Mexico, I made a list of pros/cons to each place, I'm from the US .

What won Mexico over for me was:

Closeness to the US, when I need to go back, cheap quick flight options are available.,,, I go back a lot for shopping/visiting/flight connections

Ease of getting residency- citizenship.

I already speak the language.

Ease of opening a business without the requirement of having a national as a business partner.

Easier to escape to Colombia/Brazil when the "urge" arises.

Lot's of horny guys looking for quick fucks, even if they claim to be straight.

Like everyone else said...do your homework before you make the leap.


Meeting gay expats was never on my radar and until today, don't socialize with the ones in my city, I'm friendly with them, however,  They love to hang around each other talking about how much money they have or what art they bought, instead of enjoying the young talent.....wtf?

[Londoner]

Good advice. I am in the process of deciding whether to go ahead with my proposed relocation. I'd hoped that my last few weeks in Jomtien would have given me an answer; but no, they didn't, serving only to raise more issues..

And unlike the poster, I have thirty years of visits and a LTR of twenty years to help me make a decision, not forgetting the massive financial benefits I'd reap by selling my London house. For a UK citizen of my age, the decision to relocate would be the most significant by far since I retired; and if I were to go ahead, there'd be no returning home if things went pear-shaped for financial reasons. Medical issues? even more vIsa changes? banking? another coup and nationalist government in Thailand unfriendly to foreigners? Yes, unlikely but possible. The fact is that if I move to Thailand, I die in Thailand.

What became clear a few weeks ago,  is that location is one of the most important issues.  Jomtien is our preferred location but not anywhere in the vicinity. There are areas that would not be suitable, too far from the sea, isolated in terms of transport, or too "new" and undergoing construction to be to attractive us.

So my advice is to do what I am doing; take your time and, for heaven's sake, make a trial run for few months. Not as a tourist but as a resident. Not in a hotel but in a rented condo where you have to look after yourself and sort out your own problems. 

[bkkmfj2648]

12 minutes ago, Londoner said:

make a trial run for few months. Not as a tourist but as a resident. Not in a hotel but in a rented condo where you have to look after yourself and sort out your own problems. 

Excellent sage advice.

Do not stay in a hotel.  Renting a local condo in a building in a neighborhood that appeals to you is the BEST option - as you get to "test drive" what day-to-day life would be like.

I had come to Pattaya several times over a 10 year period and I always felt the most "at home" in Jomtien - as it answered most of my retirement needs:

• I could rent a condo with a seaview balcony that overlooks the Gulf of Thailand,
• Walking distance to many gay bars and gay activities - the Jomtien Complex (aka Supertown) is a 10 minute walk from my condo, there is also Boyztown over in Pattaya City.
• Access to a gay beach - Dongtan beach is literally in front of my condo with a special beach road gate onto the gay beach,
• Access to good medical care / hospitals; Bangkok Hospital Pattaya, Pattaya Memorial Hospital, Jomtien Hospital, etc.
• Walking distance to nearby supermarkets,
• Good transportation = baht buses (songthaews) for 10 baht each way from Jomtien into South Pattaya,
• Access to international food,
• Close enough to an international airport; Suvarnabhumi and Don Mueang - are within 2 hours from Pattaya,
• Access to a big city = Bangkok,
• Access to nature and clean beaches - Koh Larn is only a 20 to 25 minutes speedboat ride away and Koh Samet is only 2 hours away, and Koh Chang is only 5 hours away.

So, I often rented AirBnBs in some of the nearby View Talays and Grand Condotel, and that is where I ended up as I liked the feeling of feeling at home in these condo residences.

[colmx]

3 hours ago, Londoner said:

Good advice. I am in the process of deciding whether to go ahead with my proposed relocation. I'd hoped that my last few weeks in Jomtien would have given me an answer; but no, they didn't, serving only to raise more issues..

Sounds like this could be a good topic for a thread in itself. I remember you had a few posts recently on wills, insurance etc., so would be curious as to where your mind is now on a relocation.

You mentioned selling your house in London, would you not downsize to a flat/apartment so you always have somewhere to return to in case things don't work out as planned, and have a base during visited to home?

[Londoner]

No closer, I fear, than I was in my previous posts. I had the chance to consider some properties in Jomtien. Beautiful and costing only 30% of my recently valued house. Do the maths! Huge (by London standards) , lavishly-furnished (too much so for my taste, sometimes!) but- and here's the rub- few available in the locations I want. Nong Prue has many but is too far from the sea. Na Jomtien also has some but there is so much work going on there that it is not the sort of environment we want. And it has transport issues....I want to give-up driving.

I'm back  there in three  months and am being contacted by estate agents daily. So who knows? One thing is certain, I want to relocate and P wants me to relocate, but I am content enough  in london to stay here,  enjoying three visits a year with my to stay with my beloved.

I thought about colmx's  idea of buying a bolt-hole....however, it couldn't be in London. A one bedroom apartment here costs the same as a three bedroom villa in Jomtien. And that's not in Chelsea or Mayfair. One of the major benefits of relocation is the money I would have left in the bank to enjoy with P. 

Which brings me to a forgotten word of advice; if you are going to struggle financially, do do in your home country!

[Olddaddy]

Work out your life day activities 

I stayed 3 months last year in Jomtien and got bored 

Waking up every morning sitting on the balcony, going to bars at night ,tooooo long ,booooring after awhile 

I need to do something,work etc 

[Marc in Calif]

1 hour ago, Olddaddy said:

Work out your life day activities 

I stayed 3 months last year in Jomtien and got bored 

Waking up every morning sitting on the balcony, going to bars at night ,tooooo long ,booooring after awhile 

I need to do something,work etc 

This makes you sound like a boring person who has no hobbies or interests whatsoever. You know only one thing: work.

But we already knew that. You mention it incessantly! 😊

 

[Mavica]

On 4/4/2025 at 7:44 AM, Ken76 said:

I am an openly gay male and looking to retire to Thailand with my boyfriend.  ... My boyfriend and I are looking to meet with other gay men in Thailand. 

Maybe it's clear to other readers but not me, but are you intending to relocate to Thailand with a current boyfriend who lives in your home country ... who is not Thai?  Or have you met a Thai abroad or online and intend to live together in Thailand?  I'm interpreting your remarks as both of you are non-Thai Americans.

 

 

[Keithambrose]

5 hours ago, Olddaddy said:

Work out your life day activities 

I stayed 3 months last year in Jomtien and got bored 

Waking up every morning sitting on the balcony, going to bars at night ,tooooo long ,booooring after awhile 

I need to do something,work etc 

Don't sit on the balcony for too long!