Gaybutton

Thank you for this absolutely excellent post. My response to what you wrote is based on my own experiences, my own opinions, and what I have heard from others. Others are likely to disagree with what I am about to write if their own experiences have been different. What you wrote is typical of what to expect on a visit to a boy's home. That includes the "farang" being expected to pay for everything and everybody. My understanding of Thai culture is that whoever has the most money, in family situations, is expected to pay when going out to restaurants and entertainment venues. If there is going to be a party, and there probably will be, then the "farang" is expected to foot the bill for that too, despite the fact that the party is in 'your honor.' The solution to this sort of problem is to have a talk with the boy in advance of the trip. Make it clear to him what you are willing to do and what you are not willing to do and how much you are willing to spend. For example, if mention is made of a party, then give the boy the money to pay for it in advance and let him know that is the limit. Make sure he understands that if the cost goes beyond what you give him, you won't pay for the additional cost. Be certain he understands you will not deviate from that. Often, during a party, then next thing you know is the boy comes to you and says something like, "Whisky finish already. You can give me 1000 baht for buy more?" When it comes to going to dinners and such, it is typical for family members and friends to invite themselves along and they expect you to foot the bill. Again, talk with the boy in advance and let him know that if anybody wants to come along for anything you wish to do, then you expect the boy to talk to you about it first, and make sure he understands that he is to talk with you in private, without the "other participants" being present. Often, you are asked if someone can go too and that person, or persons, is right there in front of you, making it very difficult to say no. Let him know you don't want to be surprised by five or six people, or more, going along when you had no expectation of that and you're the one stuck with whatever bill amount they run up. Don't forget, having a "farang" boyfriend often brings with it great status for the boy, especially if he comes from a poor family. In many cases, that's why he sought out a "farang" in the first place. Being able to have friends and family go along, with you footing the bill, enhances his status. That wouldn't be a problem so much except that it often results in the family starting to look upon you as their unlimited ATM. You become the goose laying their golden egg. I advise making it clear in advance what your limitations are and that you will not tolerate going beyond your limitations or being put on the spot. If you can't speak much Thai, then communication can certainly be a problem, but finding ways to communicate can be half the fun. I'm glad that his family members made the effort. I hear a lot of stories from "farang" who visit the boy's home and the only communication is a few smiles from the family members or being ignored completely. Meanwhile, the "farang" has absolutely no idea what's going on. That is certainly not anybody's fault, but it can get very old very quickly. There is a solution to that too. Take along a good Thai phrase book. In my opinion, the best one of all is titled Essential Thai, by James Higbie. Bookazine carries it, or you can probably order it in advance from places like Amazon.com or another online book supplier. The ISBN number is 974-202-035-3. You might also want to bring along a few books of your own. It is very unlikely that the family will have cable TV, so a few books might help you to keep from going nuts when there is absolutely nothing to do and nobody you can talk with. Few Thai homes have screens on the windows, even the more well to do homes. If the boy comes from a poor family, then hot water is not likely. You can buy them an on-demand water heater inexpensively, assuming they even have plumbing at all. Many of the poorer Thai homes don't. You can even do something simple, such as buying a new plastic trash can, having them heat water in pots, and fill the trash can with it. Now you can use a bowl or something to shower and shave comfortably. Of course, some "farang" enjoy the primitive life for a time. For some people visiting the family, but staying in a hotel might be the better option. Being able to visit the boyfriend's hometown and family can be the highlight of your trip. It can also be absolute hell. It all depends on being adaptable, being flexible, and anticipating as much as you can. Another suggestion is to bring some gifts for the family. Practical gifts seem to be appreciated more than anything else. Have the boy help you decide what to give. You might be surprised. The first time I visited my boyfriend's family he wanted to give them laundry detergent and a six-pack of fish sauce! If you have had an enjoyable experience, it doesn't hurt a thing to slip the family (a poor family) a few thousand baht when you are going to leave. If it's a more well-to-do family, doing something like going to their Buddhist temple and giving a donation to the temple is very much appreciated. I also have a couple of concerns about what you wrote. You said that a former "farang" boyfriend bought the house. You also said there is a car, so I'm assuming that also came from the "farang." My first question is did the house and car come from the same "farang?" I'm concerned that this boy may be going through "farang" until the well runs dry and then moves on to the next one. What became of the first "farang"? What ended the relationship? It is not usual for someone to buy a house and a car for a boy, furnish the house with western style plumbing and items, and then decide to walk away from the relationship. It seems as if the first "farang" intended to be a part of this boy's life for quite some time. What happened? I am worried for your sake about that. I hope you are not being conned. I've seen it happen, unfortunately, many times.

Does it necessarily have to be in the gay area? Don't forget, most of the action occurs at night. What will you be doing with your days? If you can't find something suitable in your price range, it might be more economical for you to stay somewhere else and take the Metro or Sky Train, even a taxi, to the gay area at night. One alternative could be the Embassy Hotel in Saphan Kwai. That hotel is also in the heart of a second gay area and is a 20 minute Sky Train ride to the Suriwong-Patpong gay area. They charge 700 baht per night. If you decide to stay there you probably won't even need advance reservations, but here's their number: 02-279-2641. To get there, just tell the taxi driver, "Prah-dee-PAHT soi yee-sip." If you want a copy of their business card, which does have taxi instructions written in Thai, just send me an E-mail at gaybutton@gmail.com and I'll be glad to send it to you via an E-mail attachment. Obviously there will be additional transportation costs if you do decide to stay elsewhere and use the Sky Train, but you can buy one-day passes for 100 baht at any Sky Train station and you have unlimited use of the Sky Train until midnight. Unless you plan on staying in your immediate area during the day, there will be transportation costs anyway, so that's an alternative for you to consider.

This part of the embassy statement is incorrect. Apparently they released their statement before the change was made that will allow taxis at the main terminal after all.

It turns out I was wrong about the lunches. They will be open for lunch, but I just found out it will be another week before they begin opening for lunch.

Does that mean our rendezvous has been called off?

Among the issues this legislation would cover, if passed, is that alcohol sales to anyone under the age of 25 would be banned. Also, alcohol promotion would be prohibited in stores that are open more than 16 hours per day, meaning that most convenience stores would see their alcohol sales dramatically drop. Where I come from, the response to that idea would be 'Yeah, right.' Sometimes I wonder whether some of the laws and regulations in Thailand have actually been properly studied or at least thought through. I fail to see how effectively banning alcohol promotions in 24-hour convenience stores will solve anything since Thailand already regulates the hours during which alcohol can be sold at any store. What is that supposed to accomplish? People who want to buy alcohol have already adapted to buying their liquor during legal sales hours. Stay open only part of the day and you can have all the alcohol promotions you want. Stay open all day and you can't have any alcohol promotions at all. Do you follow the logic of that? I don't. I also don't understand what is meant by the idea of banning alcohol sales to anyone under the age of 25. It is legal for Thais to patronize bars at age 21. I suppose it would mean that someone between the ages of 21 through 24 could legally patronize a bar, but will have to stick to soft drinks, orange juice, or a glass of water. Has it occurred to anyone to start enforcing laws that already exist? To me, that would make much more sense than simply creating new laws, difficult if not impossible to enforce, when many existing laws regarding alcohol are either selectively enforced or not enforced at all. To me, this sort of legislation is right up there with the 90 decibel limitation on music in bars. Has anyone been in any bars lately that actually comply with that law? Has anyone seen any police officers making bars turn down the volume? They did for about a month when that law first came into existence. After that, the volume was turned up full blast again in most bars and stayed that way. Somehow, I think the same sort of thing will happen if the alcohol law is passed as is. I don't get it. The following appears in THE NATION: _____ ALCOHOL REFORM Industry Fears the Worst from New Law Changes 'Threaten Businesses, Jobs - Won't Solve Nation's Drinking Problem' The new law aimed at controlling alcohol consumption will make people drink more and destroy brewers and related businesses, people in various associated industries said yesterday. Under the Alcohol Consumption Control bill, advertising, all forms of sales promotion activities, and the sale of alcohol to anyone under 25 would be banned. Brewers said the law would turn their future in the international market into nothing more than a pipe dream, while advertisers said the law would affect sponsorship of social activities. Anti-alcohol activists, however, insisted that a total ban on ads was needed for the sake of society. Boonrawd Trading Co's marketing manager Chatchai Wiratyosin said the total ban on advertising could lead to heavy price-cutting campaigns by new and existing alcohol players which would stimulate greater consumption. This would then lead to the major players having a monopoly in the market, as only the major players would survive a price war, he said. "It seems to be good for a big player like us, but in fact it is dangerous. We would face difficulties selling brands internationally due to a lack of domestic marketing support," Chatchai said. He said many big alcohol companies were now focusing on international markets as domestic sales growth had flattened out as a result of previous measures and laws aimed at controlling consumption. Chatchai said the company had no problem with the increase in minimum drinking age or the restriction of sales channels. "We have tried to point out the effects to the Public Health Ministry, which is the lawmaker, many times but our concerns have always been ignored," he said. However, Boonrawd Trading would send representatives to attend the public hearing on the 20th of this month to repeat its concerns, he said. Chaipranin Visudhipol, president of the Advertising Association of Thailand and TBWA (Thailand) managing director, said if the objective of the law was to make the nation drink less, a total ban on advertising would not help. "It can be seen that lao khao [white liquor] is the top-seller without any advertising," he said. "It is also the main kind of alcohol consumed by drivers who have road accidents." Besides affecting the Bt1-billion advertising budget of alcohol companies each year, the new bill will have a great effect on many useful activities sponsored by alcohol companies, such as sports, Chaipranin said. Chaipranin said the current measures to restrict alcohol ads were sufficient. Only social advertising is allowed for all kinds of alcoholic drinks now and the ads have to be aired after 10pm, he said. However, Songkran Takchokedee of the Thai Health Promotion Foundation's Stop Drinking Network insisted advertising caused an increase in new drinkers, especially youths. Despite social ads, the advertisers used tricks to prompt sales via the ads by using gaps in the law, he said. "Social advertising is more hazardous because it makes youths have a positive feeling towards drinking and the alcohol companies," he said. According to research, it is clearly seen that every dollar spent on adverting generates a significant increase in new drinkers, Songkran said. "Alcohol is more dangerous than tobacco, because while tobacco can only damage health, alcohol damages society and creates accidents and crime. So, it's unreasonable to forbid tobacco ads but allow them for alcohol," he said. Recently, CP Seven Eleven Co pledged that the clause to ban alcohol promotions in shops that open more than 16 hours a day would severely affect its more than 3,000 branches that are open 24 hours. Samarn Futrakul, from the Bureau of Non-Communicable Diseases, which oversees the drafting of the law, said enforcement of the bill would need time because it required approval from Parliament. All sections of the bill could be revised after the hearing, Samarn said. Chatrarat Kaewmorakot The Nation

The following appears in the PATTAYA CITY NEWS: _____ Classical Music event to be held at the Horseshoe Point. At Pattaya City Hall, Khun Niran, the Mayor of Pattaya chaired this press conference to announce a major classical music event which will take place here in Pattaya next month. The event is called

What's wrong with praising the atmosphere of a restaurant that isn't open yet? At different times, both TeePee and I were in the restaurant and saw the atmosphere for ourselves. Besides, TeePee is professionally experienced in the field and his review, so far, is certainly good enough for me. I plan to have my first actual experience at about noon on Friday, for lunch. We originally wanted to have dinner there, but circumstances will not permit that on Friday. So, I'll let you know what I throught of the lunch and I'm sure TeePee will let you know his opinion Saturday evening. As far as the best Angus beef, I have never experienced beef that came from cattle that grazed on sumptious (sic) Scottish grass. If that's the best beef, then I'm all for it. I'd say let it be Kobe beef, if I could afford it.

I'm behind the car park area near JJ

You made it quite clear. Unfortunately, nobody seems to know the answer as yet. I would imagine you might be able to get the answer through a visit to the Immigration Police office.

Last week there was a thread inquiring where one can go for a truly great steak. Regarding true greatness, I'm hoping that Manhattans Steak House (that's the correct spelling, by the way . . . no apostrophe) will proivide the answer to the dream. I hope Letmetellu will forgive me for being the one to "scoop" this little item, but the long awaited Manhattans Steak House will open for business on Friday, September 15. That's tomorrow, folks, and I'm hoping to be one of the first ones in there. This evening I dropped by to have a look at the menu. Actually, the bar is already open. I met the manager, Tom Vicario, an American. He is a very pleasant, experienced gentleman and he assures me that all the steaks are imported prime Angus beef from the USA and the steaks will be just what you would find in the finest American steak houses. The first thing I looked for on the menu was what I miss most of all . . . prime rib. I mean real prime rib. And, to my delight, they have it, with different cut sizes available. The menu looks fantastic. The atmosphere of the restaurant is just perfect. The prices are expensive by Thai standards, but are on par with prices you would find in better steak houses in the USA. Given that all of their beef is imported from the USA, I'm surprised at how reasonable their prices really are. Depending on what type of steak you want, and the size you want, the prices range from about 850 baht up to 1800 baht. Not bad at all. They will also be open for lunch. I have been looking forward to their opening for months. I can't wait to try it. Usually when a new restaurant opens, I wait about a month before going, to give them time to work out problems and kinks, but based on what I saw and based on their offerings, I don't think there are going to be any kinks. The location is on toip of the hill, on the way to Jomtien Beach. The telephone number is 06-103-4497. They do have a web site, http://www.manhattans-pattaya.com , but the web site is currently "under construction."

Sheeeesh! I don't have all the answers. Nobody has ever asked me about that and I have never investigated. My best guess is that the only thing that is going to change is the 30-days. Nothing else has been publicized and nothing has been said about changing anything other than the 30-days. If an under-50 year old guy was able to get a multiple O and B type Visa, to stay for a year, before now, then I know of no reason to assume that anything different will be the case in the foreseeable future. I suggest checking with the Thai embassy or the various Thai consulates in one's home country to find out. What I do know is that different consulates seem to make up their own rules about what it takes to get visas.

OPENING OF NEW BANGKOK INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT. 1. This Public Announcement is being issued to alert U.S. citizens of the potential impact the opening of Bangkok's new Suvarnabhumi International Airport may have on travelers arriving in and departing Thailand. The Suvarnabhumi International Airport will replace Bangkok's current airport, Don Muang, and is scheduled to begin operations in mid-September. Delays stemming from the phase-in of initial operations at Suvarnabhumi International Airport (BKK) are inevitable and travelers should plan accordingly. Additionally, international travelers arriving during the phase-in period may be required to travel from Suvarnabhumi airport to Don Muang airport to catch their domestic flight. Limited domestic service on Thai Airways will shift from Don Muang Airport to Suvarnabhumi International Airport on September 15. Current plans call for full international service at Suvarnabhumi beginning September 29. These dates are subject to change. Suvarnabhumi will inherit Don Muang's "BKK" international airport code and Don Muang will be recoded as "DBK". Therefore, travelers are strongly encouraged to reconfirm destinations with airlines if your travel falls on or near these dates. Information on the new airport can be found at: http://www.bangkokairportonline.com/. 2. Suvarnabhumi International Airport is located 18 miles (30 kilometers) east of downtown Bangkok and is approximately a thirty minute drive to/from downtown Bangkok in light traffic; this time is roughly equivalent to that for the existing airport. However, the drive time could be longer due to Bangkok's ubiquitous unpredictable traffic. The new airport will have no taxi facilities in the main terminal. Arriving passengers who need a taxi will have to board an airport shuttle bus from the main terminal to a nearby taxi and bus terminal. 3. The only convenient hotel near Suvarnabhumi International Airport for overnight or same day transit stops in Bangkok is the Novotel Suvarnbhumi. The hotel is located immediately in front of the airport terminal. 4. American citizens traveling to and from Thailand during the planned phase-in period are encouraged to contact their airlines for additional details and to plan accordingly. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ To subscribe or unsubscribe to this list, go to: <http://bangkok.usembassy.gov/embassy/acsemaillist.htm> The U.S. Embassy Consular Section is located at 95 Wireless Road, Bangkok 10330, Thailand (Nearest BTS Skytrain station: Phloen Chit) American Citizen Services Unit Window Hours: Monday - Friday, 7:30 - 11 AM and 1 - 2 PM Note: The ACS unit is CLOSED on the last Friday of every month. Tel: +66-2-205-4049 Fax: +66-2-205-4103 E-mail: acsbkk@state.gov <mailto:acsbkk@state.gov>

Continually leaving the country on the 30-day privilege is what they consider to be abuse. That is what they are going to change, so they say. No other types of visas or methods of renewing them are slated to be changed, as far as I know.

It seems to depend on the whim of the personnel. Sometimes there is a driving test and sometimes there isn't. That's the best I can tell you. I should mention that what I wrote above is how it's done in the Pattaya area. A few years ago I had an experience in the province of Khampaeng Phet. That boy failed the written test. 500 baht later, somehow he had passed after all. There was no driving test. Whether the boys can still get away with that or not, I don't know. After all, the current government has cleaned up all corruption, haven't they?

Some of you may recall my article about obtaining a Thai driver's license. That article, by the way, along with any of my other articles, is still available upon request if you send an E-mail to me at gaybutton@gmail.com . It is quite easy for you to get a Thai driver's license if you have an International Driving Permit and your driving license from your home country. It's a different story for Thai citizens. Some of you may want your boyfriend to obtain a driving license for a car or motorcycle. My boyfriend and I went through it just yesterday for a driving license for a car. First, make sure he arrives at the driving license office no later than 8:30 AM. It takes a good hour just waiting to submit the paper work and going through the color blindness and vision tests. Also, seating for the lecture they have to sit through is limited. The lecture begins at 9:45 AM. They get a break at about noon, and then they take the written test. That test is 30 questions and they must get at least 27 of the questions right in order to pass. If they don't pass, they can come back on any day, sit through a second lecture, this time about one hour, and re-take the test. If they do that within the same month, then at least they don't have to submit new photos and documents again. If they wait until the following month, then they have to go through the entire process again. Even if they pass the test, they still have to come back again the next day to pick up their license. It will not be issued the same day they take the test. If you go with him when he is going through this, it's a six hour ordeal for you while waiting for him to go through everything. The list of document requirements for Thais is written in Thai, and the list is available only at the driver's license office, and it's quite a distance from town. However, I made a copy of the list. If you would like to have a copy of the list to give to your boyfriend, so he'll know in advance what he needs, send me an E-mail and I'll be glad to send you the list.

I know of no visa that permits you to stay as long as you please. Even the retirement visa is good or only one year at a time and then has to be renewed, at which time it can be turned down if there is a legal reason to turn it down.

A few people who post here ought to take the quoted post and save it. This is the way to write constructive criticism. Positive things were also said and the criticism is written in a manner that is not even remotely insulting or harmful to the business, and yet still accomplishes what the author wants to see changed or improved. I will be out of town on the day of the "Birthday Bash." I will be sorry to miss it.

I don't see the point of these cash cards in the first place, whether one likes King Power or not. Why would someone buy this cash card when one can just as easily pay cash in most currencies or pay by credit card? I don't get it.

RichLB and I are personal friends. He is just fine and all is quite well with him.

Oh my gosh! More urine? Well, I can't comment on that one, having never been there, but GayThailand brings up a very important point . . . pushy mama-sans. That can be very intimidating to first-timers in Thailand's gay bars, especially when they do not know how things work or what they can and cannot do. I'm sure many readers here have suggestions as to how to handle that sort of situation, and I hope they will post their suggestions. For the benefit of newbies, how do you handle it when you find yourself dealing with a pushy mama-san?

TeePee, I don't understand the point you are trying to make. When I say that this policy will apply only to holders of the 30-day whatever-it-is, am I incorrect about that? Is that what you are saying? Please clarify.

BANGKOK, Sept 10 (TNA) Siam Commercial Bank (SCB) and King Power Group,the largest operator of duty free and tax free in Thailand, plan to launch the

Is that what "we" think? Sorry, but being a moderator does not mean that the moderator has to forfeit his right to post. The task of a moderator is to make sure that the posts fall within the posting rules and that posts do not contain anything that could cause problems for the owner of the web site. I know of no valid reason why a moderator should not be able to post just like everyone else.

That is correct. I far less strict about it on this web site because it is not my own web site and I do my best to follow the policies of the owner. I'm also curious as to why you pass yourself off as two people when you are only one person, and use "we" and "us" all the time instead of "I." May I ask why you do that?