vinapu Posted January 18, 2014 Posted January 18, 2014 buckbee, I don't think theres' Its seems here that the thinking is because your older and your dating a much younger guy then its all about money. Hes NOT a prostitute and hes NOT after money. buckbee I don't think this is what contributors thought, rather you case was used by posters a base for wider reflections about relationship between two guys with substantial difference in age. We wish you well and may be some are even a little jealous but certainly are keeping that feeling for themselves kokopelli 1 Quote
Guest anonone Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Buckbee. Again, best of luck as you explore the new relationship. As someone with a younger BF (20 year age difference between us), there is a bit more to be considered other than just the age difference. While age is a factor, there are other things that impact the entire package much more. Sharing common interests and activities, simliar desires and interests, sexual compatibility...the list is very long. It is the dynamic of the 2 people together that will determine if the relationship works. And it is a mistake to make some assumptions based on age. In my relationship, I am actually the one that wants to hit the clubs, be on the go, stay up all night, and explore new experiences. Many times, BF would be just as happy to stay at home, relaxing, listen to music, and snuggle under the covers for hours. Sometimes we go out, sometimes we stay in. Sometimes we hit the clubs, sometimes we go to a movie. But regardless of the activity, we think of each other and have a good time. Enjoy the newness of the relationshi. Try to find that magic balance where you do not overthink things....have a trusting, open heart...but keep your wits about you and remember to take care of yourself. Not easy to do, but try anyway. LOL Quote
Guest abang1961 Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Buckbee, After reading your write-ups, I (and probably everyone on this board) wish you all the best... I am green with envy.....but nonetheless, make it work for both of you... Quote
kokopelli Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Buckbee; like some others, envious of your experience. Some farang find love with well educated Thais who can fend for themselves; others find lads who are in no need of money but just love; some find entrepreneurial friends who can turn a baht into a billion; and then there are those who find love with a poor boy from Issan who depend on our largess to live a better life. Am waiting for the next installment of your adventures. Quote
williewillie Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Some young guys enjoy a fling with an old man and toss them aside when they get bored. Worst case is a broken heart. At least your wallet seems safe and broken hearts hearts mend and we dive back in again. No one knows and sometimes unlikely relationships do work if one can stay on the roller coaster long enough. ChristianPFC 1 Quote
Guest buckbee Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Thanks guys I really appreciate the comments, your all nice supportive guys here. Sorry I have to run but have a date with him at 6pm, just hoping it goes well. He loves family guy so I got him a few DVDs to give him Am waiting for the next installment of your adventures. I will but just not ready to write about it yet, I never want to hurt him in any way. I told him about the story I wrote on my blog and he was cool with that, I think he read it too, will ask him... Quote
vinapu Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Some young guys enjoy a fling with an old man and toss them aside when they get bored. Worst case is a broken heart. This is our side of story but I guess younger boys would have plenty stories about older men who got bored and dumped them for newer modes too. williewillie 1 Quote
Guest anonone Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 This is our side of story but I guess younger boys would have plenty stories about older men who got bored and dumped them for newer modes too. This is very true, and a reason for distrust on behalf of the Thai boys. Many falang give assurances about undying love, only to abandon them without so much as a phone call. I have many Thai friends that have lived through this. Heartache is a risk for both sides.... Quote
vinapu Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 This is very true, and a reason for distrust on behalf of the Thai boys. Many falang give assurances about undying love, only to abandon them without so much as a phone call. I have many Thai friends that have lived through this. Heartache is a risk for both sides.... few years ago when booking in BBB Inn youngish farang in front of me was negotiating extending his stay for that day since his flight was leaving late at night or early in the morning next day. Later on he sat beside me at one of those upstairs bars / Hotmale or X-size, not Dreamboys /, we even exchanged few words ,during show he invited boy to sit with him and was getting pretty intimate with him at times, after show he did not tip boy promising to off him next evening instead fully knowing he will be leaving in few hours. But there's happy ending to that story, going downstairs he misstep, felled down, did not hurt himself but broke his glasses , obviously boy's Guardian Angel was pissed off with that mischievous farang. To this day I feel uneasy about this as I think I should somehow intervene either by shaming him in front of boy or at least slip boy 100 baht williewillie and kokopelli 2 Quote
Guest abang1961 Posted January 19, 2014 Posted January 19, 2014 Being accepted, being rejected, being overlooked, being dumped (without a whisper) are just part and parcel of (gay) life, right? It is awful to think of the disappointment every time something goes wrong. Why dont we focus on the positive side? Most of us are no longer young and adorable, so if the companionship with younger Thais or other nationalities is exchanged with gifts, let it be.... dont expect too much .. just let it be.... Quote
Guest buckbee Posted January 20, 2014 Posted January 20, 2014 It can work guys, last night I took him to a restaurant owned by a couple of mates that I know who are gay. One is 60 and the other 40, a 20 year gap. They have been together in a relationship for 12 years and own a house and restaurant together. Its the same age gap between us. We had a great time, we both felt comfortable together and we were able to show our love for each other in public. He was so open to me last night, anything I asked him, he told me everything and I'm starting to really understand why were together. He just messaged me telling me he wants to take me out for Japanese this week, his shout. I messaged back telling him I want to suck his dick and he said "Yay" lol just let it be I'm starting to do that now and its working, he's contacting me now instead of the other way around. A the start I was far too persistent and we didn't meet again for 10 days as a result only to abandon them without so much as a phone call That just sux and its the luv roller-coaster emotions that hurts the other person, if its not working or you just want sex, then just tell them, its not so hard, it saves so much grief for the other person Quote
Guest buckbee Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 He rang me late last night and wanted to see me again, so we went parking and played. It all seems right but I have asked him if he loves me and he never answers me, just changes the conversation or looks away. When I leave him I tell him I luv him and he just walks off and doesn't say anything. Its probably just an Asian thing where guys just don't talk about their emotions. With my previous Thai boyfriend he was the same and only very rarely would say that he loved me and that would only be if no one was around Quote
Smiles Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 So stop asking ... pushing for answers you want will never work. You just come across as needy and juvenile. vinapu and williewillie 2 Quote
Guest buckbee Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 Everyone is needy Smiles, aren't you? and I'm a monkey in the Chinese, so yeah I'm a bit of a kid at heart, that's my character, so be it Quote
bkkmfj2648 Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 Hello Buckbee, If it were me - I would not ask him anymore if he loves you. The constant asking him might push him away. Let him decide when and if he wants to tell you he loves you. When I was younger, and I felt in love with someone - I would tell them and then immediately expect that they told me that they loved me. This was very unfair of me (and was because I was insecure and needed to hear that he loves me to confirm that my love for him was real). After many times of asking him, he would cease to see me. Often I found out because he did not like the constant stress of having to say, "Yes, I love you". If your inner peace will not stay calm until you hear those words from him - you most likely will destroy this new love story that is just being born. give it time to blossom - and let him tell you when the feeling is right. Regarding Love - we all have different speeds to fall in love - sometimes it is fast, sometimes it is slow. This is the beauty of dating someone new - the adventure. good luck and just enjoy his company and give him space to fall in love with you... m. williewillie and vinapu 2 Quote
Guest abang1961 Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 Biuckbee, I am dedicating this song to you... by the late/famous Teresa Tang. She died in Chiangmai in 1995 and you should play it to your Chinese Hongkonger. He should understand it... Teresa sings "The moon represents my heart". This is a 1978 recording. Enjoy it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBD_8_da7lM Quote
Guest buckbee Posted January 21, 2014 Posted January 21, 2014 Thanks bkkmfj2648, I've been finding it real hard to handle the love and emotions of it all. I'm not good at love and I get too emotional but I need to get through this and be strong. You are right and I understand exactly what you wrote above. I can now see that I'm not being fair with him by asking, if he wants to tell me he will when he wants to. Its also just shown me how insecure I really am. Thanks abang1961, beautiful love song from the heart. My love has been a full moon and far too blinding, it needs to go into a nice not over the top crescent shape. I will show him and let you know his reaction. She looks beautiful and young in the video how old was she when she passed away? Thanks for everyone's help with this, I appreciate it and its helping me to develop the relationship. GTF is a wonderful place if you have a gay problem, so many good friendly guys here ready to help Quote
Guest buckbee Posted January 24, 2014 Posted January 24, 2014 I sent him the song via facebook messenger and he replied "lol i know her lol my mum's idol" Quote
vinapu Posted February 12, 2014 Posted February 12, 2014 buckbee , you're silent recently, hope it's because you occupied with your new love. All the best for both of you Quote
Guest buckbee Posted February 12, 2014 Posted February 12, 2014 Thanks mate, its just been perfect vinapu. We have spent so much time together and we have got to know each other really well and are both in love. I love every minute that I spend with him and we feel so comfortable and safe when were together. It not just dating any more, I take him to work and we go shopping together etc and were now looking at moving in together I will write about it one day soon... Quote
vinapu Posted February 13, 2014 Posted February 13, 2014 I'm glad I was right, congratulations and all the best ! Quote
Guest abang1961 Posted February 13, 2014 Posted February 13, 2014 Thanks mate, its just been perfect vinapu. We have spent so much time together and we have got to know each other really well and are both in love. I love every minute that I spend with him and we feel so comfortable and safe when were together. It not just dating any more, I take him to work and we go shopping together etc and were now looking at moving in together I will write about it one day soon... Buckbee, congrats and great to learn about your improving relationship with this Asian. It is just time for another song (again?) This time, it is by Ms Sally Yeh. She is my age (53 this year) and had been singing for the past 30 years and this is one entitled "Blessings" (how apt) On behalf of all forummers here, may I send to you two all the blessings possible... Enjoy the good time together.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41BmZer_NvQ Quote
williewillie Posted February 13, 2014 Posted February 13, 2014 Buckbee a rare man on the forums. Many post their tales of woe, but very few actually listen to and heed advise. Bravo Buckbee and continued success and joy . vinapu 1 Quote
Guest buckbee Posted February 13, 2014 Posted February 13, 2014 abang, just sent him the video link, he knew the other song in fact Teresa Tang is his Mums idol Thanks guys for all the support, you guys are all so helpful, caring and wonderful on GTF Maybe we get married one day, I hope so... Quote
Guest buckbee Posted April 11, 2014 Posted April 11, 2014 Its all going fantastic, were still together after 3 and a half months and he has moved in with me Got him a nice pair of tight Levi's for winter Sunbathing at the beach a few weeks ago Quote