Is it Up to the Boy?

[TotallyOz]

GoneFishing wrote in another thread that often the boys don't have the option not to go with a customer. I am wondering if that is something that many have experienced. I have never had a boy say no to me. However, I have talked to many boys who refuse to go with clients who are other ethnicities, or have a bad reputation or a number of other reasons. I have been told by the boys I asked and they all said it was "up to boy." I do hope this is the case but do others know of bars that don't allow it to be "up to boy."

[Guest Snowkat]

........ do others know of bars that don't allow it to be "up to boy."

Personally I would not contemplate even entering a bar which had a policy to force their boys to go with whoever paid the bar fine, regardless of whether the boy wanted to or not. The boy should have some say in who is going to slobber over him and paw or screw him, regardless of whether he is being paid or not.

 

If a boy is unwilling to go with a customer but only does so because he is forced by the bar policy, I would suggest that the "service" the boy provides would be minimal at best and a disaster at worst !

[Guest pete1969]

Most boys have some leeway within reason. If a customer looks okay as far as being well groomed and well mannered and does not have a bad reputation, then the boy would need a really good reason to refuse.

 

My BF is gay, and refused to go with women customers. When he worked at Jupiter and Boys BKK, the captians knew he greatly preferred Asian customers, so would try to steer those to him. He assures me a boy can refuse a customer for good reason but that there are not many times a boy does that as the boy is there to make money. Usually, it is with a customer who tipped poorly the last time or mistreated the boy in some way.

 

Pete

[Guest luvthai]

It does not take long for the farangs reputation to get around. If he is nice, tips well and treats the boy well, then it is unusal that a boy will refuse to go off with him. If a farang is a good patron and is well know to the bar staff then yes they do put pressure on the boy to go off even if the boy would rather go to the disco or movie with friends. On the other hand should a farang have the reputation of smelling bad or tips poorly or is rude and loud the boy can say no and often does.

[Guest gonefishing]

I have never had a boy say no to me. I have been told by the boys I asked and they all said it was "up to boy."

 

There are a lot of ways of boys "saying no" without appearing to do so and, whatever one's physical or financial attractions, I would be surprised if it has not happened to all of us at one time or another.

 

These excuses can vary from being sick (preferably with an unpleasant and contagious disease, which may also elicit a generous donation for hospital expenses!) to wanting to go to a friend's party. All may or may not be true, but the best thing for all concerned is to treat them as if they are.

 

Most boys are unlikely to say anything than other it is "up to boy", unless they know you very well and trust you, as otherwise it could either get back to the bar and cause trouble for them or it could imply that they went with you because they had to.

 

While boys may not be directly forced to go with customers, there are varying degrees of coercion and they may often be encouraged by the management to go and discouraged to refuse.

 

In a recent thread one poster wrote about one boy, described as obviously straight, whom he had been trying to "top" without success for a number of years. He then saw him being topped in the bar's f****** show; when he asked the boy why he could do this in the show (despite the obvious loss of face) and not with him the boy explained that he had been told that if he did not then he would lose his job and have problems (unexplained) with his visa. This boy was a "superstar, off every night", yet that made no difference so what chance would less popular (and commercially less productive) boys have? Interestingly the question of coercion was never raised in that thread - the only question was where the boy was now!

 

The amount of coercion varies from bar to bar and depends on both the owner and the mama-san; some are more pleasant, even protective, than others. It does lead to a number of bar-boys becoming free-lancers when they can pick and choose for themselves , without pressure, but it also increases some of the friction between bar-boy and free-lancers. The former often describe the latter as unreliable, untrustworthy and too lazy to work, while the latter see the former as prostitutes working in brothels (which, of course, they are not!).

 

Pete1969 has got it right when he says that "most boys have some leeway within reason".

[Gaybutton]

Pete1969 has got it right when he says that "most boys have some leeway within reason".

 

I agree. While few bars will try to make a boy go "off" against his will, they rarely need to. Most boys will go "off" with a customer, even if they have no intention of a sexual encounter, because they make more money from bar bonuses that way. Many bars give the boys a bonus if they have been taken "off" enough times during a month. In those bars, what is likely to happen is the boy will go "off" and then come up with some excuse after he has been taken "off," but before arriving at the "farang's" hotel. He may not get a tip from the "farang," but he does get credited with the "off."

 

The usual exception to that is when the boy believes someone else will "off" him that evening, although I have seen boys refuse an "off" when they know the customer is a cheapskate tipper or is abusive in some other way.