How often do you keep in touch with your Boyfriend when not in Thailand?

[TotallyOz]

How do you keep in touch with your boy special or boyfriend? How often do you do this?

 

For me, he sends me email ever few days and we talked 2-3 times each week. I enjoy hearing his voice if it is only 15 minutes. He also catches me up on all the family and friends.

 

He also sends me photos once a week or more as he knows I like seeing him when I am not in Thailand so he takes photos at his work or at his home. It makes me happy to see these and keeps him in my memory a bit better.

 

I do use Skype to talk to him but not the video call as he is on a cell phone.

 

How often to you chat with the BF when you are away from LOS?

[Guest anonone]

We speak 3 times a day, on average. I have unlimited calling to Thai phones (includes mobile phones) via Skype. I think it is about $12USD per month. Calls can be 30 seconds or 1 hour, depending on our mood, if we are busy, etc.

 

He lives in Isan, so he only occasionally has Internet access...if he gets phone Internet packet. When he has Internet, we "chat" via Whatapp, which often includes photos. Like Michael, I really enjoy getting photos, and he wants them of me as well. We also send more "silly" photos...what we are eating, friends, parties...whatever we can send to share some parts of our lives.

 

I have him looking into getting Internet service at his house. Seems this is a recent option for his town. It would be great to be able to webcam, as well as get him regular Internet access for studies, Facebook. All the web stuff. No word on cost yet.

[kokopelli]

I usually call the bf about once a week on a regular basis for maybe a 10 minute chat.  Also send short text messages once a week;  ATM = #000 BAHT;  he really enjoys the text messages.

[Guest abang1961]

Hmm.. It is so sweet of you guys to communicate even when you are miles apart.

I remember 25 years ago, I had to depend on snail mails (anyone remembers Aerogramme?).

There was so much excitement to check the letterbox then.

 

Now thanks to technology, everything is down to the wires - emails, whatsapp, viber and skype.

Perhaps you two can opt for some cloud-sharing FREE apps like dropbox.

There is a FREE deposit up to 2 GB.. plenty of space ...to see him in his glory....

Whenever one of you takes a photo, it will automatically be deposited into that account.

So it will be permanent (unless deleted by either party).

[KhorTose]

We don't keep in touch as much as I would like, and we live together    Oh well, marriage really isn't everything it is cracked up to be, but better then the alternatives.  At least for me.

[Guest thaiworthy]

Now thanks to technology, everything is down to the wires - emails, whatsapp, viber and skype.

 

Even today you cannot always have these conveniences available. If your guy lives in a remote village, there may be no internet shop, and if he lives near mountains, his air card may not work.

 

The result is yesterday's only means of communication, snail mail, which can take two weeks to receive and another two weeks to send.

[Guest abang1961]

TW

Pardon me.

Oops I have been living in the city for most, if not all these 51+ years.

I did not have that thought that in certain remote and rural areas, reception is poor  and technology is less advanced.

My apologies.

[kokopelli]

Hmm.. It is so sweet of you guys to communicate even when you are miles apart.

I remember 25 years ago, I had to depend on snail mails (anyone remembers Aerogramme?).

There was so much excitement to check the letterbox then.

Yes, I do remember Aerogrammes. My twin served in the Vietnam War and would communicate with me via Aerogrammes. I still have them from 45 + years ago.

[Guest thaiworthy]

For those of us, like me, who did not know what an Aerogram is. Here is the definition:

 

 

An Aerogram, Aérogramme or Air Letter is a thin lightweight piece of foldable and gummed paper for writing a letter for transit via airmail, in which the letter and envelope are one and the same. Most postal administrations forbid enclosures in these light letters, which are usually sent abroad at a preferential rate. Printed warnings existed to say that an enclosure would cause the mail to go at the higher letter rate.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aerogram

 

Now that I know what it is, I can say I actually have a few of these! Not as old as Koko's, mine are only 35 years old from a handsome young man I met in Switzerland who was around my age, at the time-- 27.

[Guest fountainhall]

I once sent one from Hong Kong to my mother in the UK (way outside London). I posted it on a Monday. Her reply, also by aerogram, was delivered to my condo 5 days later with the Saturday morning post! Now I can have airmail envelopes with the blue and red markings on the edges and extra AIR MAIL stickers all over them them take 7 weeks to get from Bangkok to the UK! 

[Rogie]

The last time I sent an aerogram was to a friend in Burma. There was no internet and he didn't have a phone. The last one I sent must have been a few years ago, and internet shops are common in Rangoon now, although I'd guess they are still uncommon in rural areas.

[williewillie]

I use thaitel.com to call and have been pleased with the service.  They offer many different plans.  I call every 4 or 5 days and

enjoy catching up with him.  Emails less frequent and sometimes short messages on facebook as well.

He is up in his village currently and not always able to go on line so the telephone works best.

[Guest No2]

How do you keep in touch with your boy special or boyfriend? How often do you do this?

 

For me, he sends me email ever few days and we talked 2-3 times each week. I enjoy hearing his voice if it is only 15 minutes. He also catches me up on all the family and friends.

 

He also sends me photos once a week or more as he knows I like seeing him when I am not in Thailand so he takes photos at his work or at his home. It makes me happy to see these and keeps him in my memory a bit better.

 

I do use Skype to talk to him but not the video call as he is on a cell phone.

 

How often to you chat with the BF when you are away from LOS?

We sms/text at least 4 times per day, morning from him, because Thailand is awake 6-7 hours before UK...good morning etc...I sms back. Same at night, everyday for 6 years bar certain days with some exceptions. Speak on phone at least once every day where possible, my landline or mobile to hs mobile from the UK at 1/2pence or 1 pence per minute depending on who are best rates and best clearest lines at the time.

 

He is in Issan but never any problem with contact. As well as that we send pic messages when there is anything new to show. I visit Thailand regularly 3-4 times per year over the last 12+ years. We use email only occassionally as we dont think there is any need on top of the daily sms/texts and calls. He never goes to bed/sleep without sending a good night, sweet dreams, miss you na...sms/text, even if we have exchanged blunt words earlier in the day. That thankfully is a very rare occurance as we both are very laid back in that respect.  

 

I was a complete slut and butterfly for the first 6 years i visited Thailand, I met him at the perfect time when I was ready to settle a little, he was all the seperate elements from my ideal thai guys wrapped up in one neat little package, with honesty, credibility, and thoughtfulness added in on top, very lucky break for me. Never looked back. Great when you can trust someone when so far apart at times.

 

My advice to other westerners looking for a Thai Bf, avoid Pattaya, search around, talk with non-scene guys and make a effort with a Thai guy outwith the bar/massage industry. There are many Thai guys out there with no connection to the commercial sex industry other than friends of friends etc.. It takes alot of effort and time and shear endeavourance to find a guy, but it is worth it in the long run. No worries about other farang bfs, giks, customers, lies etc.. and it is likely he will not already be spoiled with money and unrealistic values. It gives you something to hold on to. It makes you think twice about rash decisions. In my bfs town/village there are a few katoey and many gay boys, 2 are commercial guys who moved to Pattaya,one was actually 'commercial' in the nearest town before going to Pattaya, 2 or 3 have moved to Bkk outskirts to work in factories, most just stay in the village working at various jobs from waiters in local resorts/restaurants to 7-11 workers to suger plant workers... some of these non commercial boys would love to have a western boyfriend, but not through working in the sex industry. Some are very sure of themselves and what they will and will not do. I often see posts on forums such as Latintop on SGF forum saying everyone is for sale in Thailand, in my experience that is NOT the case.

[Guest scottishguy]

Every day - and if I miss his SMS or Phone Call, my name is mud! 

[williewillie]

I also keep in touch with lots of Thai guys that I know on gayromeo.com.

Many touch base at least once a week and usually just ask how I am and what I am doing?

It does keep them fresh in my mind and when one says he is not doing so good, I don't bite and ask as

I know an infusion of baht will take care of most problems.

[williewillie]

Has anyone welcomed scottishguy yet?  He was a major poster on another gaythailand forum for years but left

recently.  I believe he will find this forum a good place to hang out and contribute .

[Guest scottishguy]

Thanks for your kind words williewiilie

 

[TotallyOz]

Welcome Scottishguy!

[Guest fountainhall]

My advice to other westerners looking for a Thai Bf, avoid Pattaya, search around, talk with non-scene guys and make a effort with a Thai guy outwith the bar/massage industry. There are many Thai guys out there with no connection to the commercial sex industry other than friends of friends etc.

 

It always amazes me that so many posts on most forums suggest that Pattaya (just occasionally Bangkok) and the bars and massage parlours are the only places where boyfriends will be found. I once got ridiculed on another forum for even suggesting it! There are huge numbers of gay guys here who would not go near that scene. As No2 says, it's not as easy to find them and it will take longer to get to know them. For those visiting for a short holiday, I appreciate that time may work against that. But it worked for No2 as it has worked for others who contribute to this Board.

 

So thanks No2 for illustrating an alternative view of what makes Thailand such a great place. 

[Guest thaiworthy]

I was a complete slut and butterfly for the first 6 years i visited Thailand, I met him at the perfect time when I was ready to settle a little, he was all the seperate elements from my ideal thai guys wrapped up in one neat little package, with honesty, credibility, and thoughtfulness added in on top, very lucky break for me. Never looked back. Great when you can trust someone when so far apart at times.

 

What a great story!

 

Of course, all this texting, calling and emailing presumes your guy is adept in communicating with you. There are many sweet guys not in the industry who just don't know enough English. I'm not sure how many nice Isaan boys, fresh off the farm, will know much more than I lie you. This can make contact extremely difficult. So if you are going to propose looking outside of the Pattaya venues, your chances of finding a reasonably fluent guy is very near nil, at least in my opinion, unless you speak Thai. I could never text 4 times a day. Seems like overkill to me. I don't know what I would text that many times each day, every year, for six years that didn't repeat itself monotonously and ad nauseum. I like WillieWillie's pattern, at least once a week. 

 

Some real Thai guys are conditioned to save money, no matter who's spending it. My bf hated spending 9 baht for a text message, so I didn't do that. It was an LDR for 14 years. I know distance makes the heart grow fonder, but doing this for 6 years is beyond my comprehension. But I certainly don't begrudge No2 for his style, I think this is very romantic. I wish him the best. I think he is a very, very lucky man.

 

if the conditions are right, go for as much contact as you can get. But be cautioned, there are mountains that restrict cell phone signals and you may have to move the mountain. There may not be an internet shop where they can go to send their emails or Skype with you. Even university students, may be just plain busy trying to get an education. So yes, it does take time and most farang on 2-3 week holidays do not have that time to invest.

 

Well I see now Fountainhall just posted everything else I wanted to say. Gotta be quick around here with him around. 

[KhorTose]

Thanks for your kind words williewiilie

 

Are you the same scottishguy that was on SGT?  If you are then you are more then welcome.  If not, then were you aware that that is the name of a prominent well known poster on another board.  That would not mean you weren't welcome, but we would like to get to know you as a different person rather then assuming you are the well known Scottishguy.  Sorry about this, but I had to ask as it is quite common for some trolls to take a name off of one board and go to another board, sometimes just to make the persons whos handle they stole look bad.

[kokopelli]

Welcome Scotty. I think you will find the pestilence was removed from this forum and hopefully will not return..

[kokopelli]

We sms/text at least 4 times per day, morning from him,

 No 2, you are a true romantic.

[Guest scottishguy]

Thank you Michael, Kokopelli and Khor Tose.

 

To answer KT's question - I am one and the same!

 

I can't have a hyphen in my username here, hence the slight change.

 

[Guest No2]

What a great story!

 

Of course, all this texting, calling and emailing presumes your guy is adept in communicating with you. There are many sweet guys not in the industry who just don't know enough English. I'm not sure how many nice Isaan boys, fresh off the farm, will know much more than I lie you. This can make contact extremely difficult. So if you are going to propose looking outside of the Pattaya venues, your chances of finding a reasonably fluent guy is very near nil, at least in my opinion, unless you speak Thai. I could never text 4 times a day. Seems like overkill to me. I don't know what I would text that many times each day, every year, for six years that didn't repeat itself monotonously and ad nauseum. I like WillieWillie's pattern, at least once a week. 

 

Some real Thai guys are conditioned to save money, no matter who's spending it. My bf hated spending 9 baht for a text message, so I didn't do that. It was an LDR for 14 years. I know distance makes the heart grow fonder, but doing this for 6 years is beyond my comprehension. But I certainly don't begrudge No2 for his style, I think this is very romantic. I wish him the best. I think he is a very, very lucky man.

 

if the conditions are right, go for as much contact as you can get. But be cautioned, there are mountains that restrict cell phone signals and you may have to move the mountain. There may not be an internet shop where they can go to send their emails or Skype with you. Even university students, may be just plain busy trying to get an education. So yes, it does take time and most farang on 2-3 week holidays do not have that time to invest.

 

Well I see now Fountainhall just posted everything else I wanted to say. Gotta be quick around here with him around. 

Just to straighten up a couple of things. WE text 4 times per day, 2 from me in reply to the 2 from him. Not quite sure why you think 2 texts each way (morning and night),and a conversation is 'over the top'. Some days it's not long enough! Think about it, we both have full active lives, me Euroland he Issan, after 6 years knowing eachother and me visiting his home 3-4 times per year we have a multitude of commonly known people from his family, our Thai friends, his villge is a very busy place with things going on all the time, my life is busy with so many things going on. There is ALWAYS something to tell/discuss. We also have other things in common such as music, thats something we can talk about for ages, I love all the genres of Thai music as he does as well as he likes western 'superstars' (gaga rihanna etc) and rock, he will happily adorn black eye-liner and fix his hair to copy Greenday's main man.  

 

Williewillies patern suits him, that would never do for us, we NEED to speak daily.Once a week for the love of my life??? We could never accept that! Why do you base others such as me on your own experiences or life, there NOTHING ad nauseum about our interaction. Again think about it. I visit, say March for a month, then again say, July...we spend the first month after I come home discussing my previous trip and catching up will all the people I actually met and their lives etc... then in say, June we have huge discussions about my up coming trip, plans, ideas concerts, days away here and there, where we will stay around Thailand, Issan, Bkk, Pattaya, etc..etc.. That only leaves May as the month where there is not something absolutely current between us, and there is so much going on everywhere there is TONS to talk about!  

 

My bf is bright, did well at school and writes english in the correct fashion, the way he was taught, so texting is not a massive problem if kept simple and free of complicated sentences. He has learned so much more since we first met he takes in things very quickly, that is part of my comment that I was very lucky indeed. There is NO need for me to be 'fluent' in Thai (i can talk a little Thai/lao/issan) or him to be 'fluent' in english. But yes he does talk and understand straight forward english very well due to his own ability to learn.

 

Also i am a little surprised and slightly disappointed in your attitude that all boys from Issan must be 'fresh off the farm' and unable to know/understand english and not intelligent enough to learn very quickly. Go into Khon Kaen city and you will find many boys who hardly know a westerner, but are well versed in English. I dont know where your circle of thai friends is based but it might be an idea to 'widen' your circle. There is a lot going on out there and alot of progress in the forward thinking of young Thai people, from Issan or not!

 

Also I had already visited Thailand for actually nearer 7 years before I even met him so I had already experienced the full circle of Pattaya/Bkk based bpys from the 'industry', Dont get me wrong there are many many lovely and genuine (as far as they can be) boys working in the industry who are only there to find a western bf, who dont buy into the drugs, lies and free rolling sex lives that so many gay boys do who arrive in Pattaya. But early on I decided after the first couple of years soaking up experiences of others and getting to know the 'scene' that I never wanted a bf, I was perfectly happy being free on my own, yes i had 'regular' guys but none classed as bfs. 

 

It was from these guys I knew quite closely in Pattaya and Bkk which put me off from finding a bf in the 'industry'. When you get close with some, visit their rooms become 'part' of their social circles it is then you get the full picture of how they operate with westerners. I made it clear I was not bf material, so I was entrusted with many 'tricks of the trade' and I didnt like what I saw and experienced. Even what I thought could be bf types and thought genuine guys would shock me the way they 'played' western customers, to many it was ingrained from an 18 year old arriving in Pattaya, do you think they listen to westerners or their friends?  Do you thik they follow the examples of westerners or their friends?

 

In some respects I was as bad, two boys i really liked who always spent at least some time with me every visit because they were attractive and good fun would have made disasterous bfs. I never really pre-announced an arrival in Pattaya, but I had plenty of mobile numbers and knew where to find A and B. It was nothing to A to have another regular customer pay his off from the bar every night, make an excuse to say he was out with frineds and then meet up with me for a night on the town and/or sex and then return to his 'customer' and sleep all night with him and get another tip from him. And this regualr customer was generous, in terms of Pattaya, he gave him at least Bt2000 per overnight sex or not. He was a nice western guy, good heart...but what good did that do him in Pattaya, he was still taken advantage of.

 

I was firm in my ways and would pay Bt1000 short and Bt1500 long, but A  would sometimes stay with me for a lesser tip than he would get from his 'sponsor'. Sometimes he would even not take my money as say he was already being looked after and would get a tip from his other 'customer'. I didn't interfere with their 'other' lives but that gave me a real understanding of how the scene was operating. I just used to say to myself who can blame them? but didn't want part of it for any serious long term committment.

 

I, and others will take your 'caution' on board regarding keeping in contact, but believe me, if two people WANT to keep in touch the technology out there will always allow it someway or other.

 

But you deserve a great deal of credit, far more than me.......to have kept a LTR going for 14 years, that seems incredible, but I know from personal experience just how possible and do-able that is and could be for me. You must have a system that works for you, but dont be unbelieving of others who even after 6 years still have the feeling that sometimes it feels like only 6 months as we are STILL learning things from eachother. Every trip while there is a lot of same/repetition there is also always something new. We look forward to the time we have togther, but we also appreciate the time apart and THAT really keeps things 'fresh' I look forward to my trips to Thailand every bit now as much as I did in 2000 when I first visited. I still get 'excited' when booking the flight and planning what we might do and where we might go 'this time'. And we still have only covered a fraction of what is out there in Thailand.

 

Rambling a bit I know, but sometimes things just 'spew' out!