Arguing civilly -- is it too much to ask?

[Guest oxygen]

I am sometimes a devil's advocate because debates are fun and intellectually stimulating. Winning is not my goal, and I am happy to admit defeat any time. However, it seems Thai lads I've met do not take this lightly, and many of them are incapable of arguing civilly. They become uncomfortable when cornered (they don't shrug and laugh it off like I do). Occasionally the guy gets furious and verbally attacks me (e.g. how I look)!

 

I know there are this kind of people in every country, but I don't expect educated people from top universities (at least the ones I know) to be like this.

 

GRrrrr...  

[Guest thaiworthy]

I am sometimes a devil's advocate because debates are fun and intellectually stimulating. Winning is not my goal, and I am happy to admit defeat any time. However, it seems Thai lads I've met do not take this lightly, and many of them are incapable of arguing civilly. They become uncomfortable when cornered (they don't shrug and laugh it off like I do). Occasionally the guy gets furious and verbally attacks me (e.g. how I look)!

 

I know there are this kind of people in every country, but I don't expect educated people from top universities (at least the ones I know) to be like this.

 

GRrrrr...  

 

Normally at this point, I would say welcome to the board. Sorry I can't oblige you as a sparring partner, but thanks for the warning.

[baobao]

I am sometimes a devil's advocate because debates are fun and intellectually stimulating. Winning is not my goal, and I am happy to admit defeat any time. However, it seems Thai lads I've met do not take this lightly, and many of them are incapable of arguing civilly. They become uncomfortable when cornered (they don't shrug and laugh it off like I do). Occasionally the guy gets furious and verbally attacks me (e.g. how I look)!

 

I know there are this kind of people in every country, but I don't expect educated people from top universities (at least the ones I know) to be like this.

 

GRrrrr...  

 

Humor and sarcasm don't translate well from language to language or culture to culture very often. That may be part of it. Not seeing or hearing the exchange it's difficult to help you here.

[Bob]

Sorry but I'm having a "is this real?" moment so, perhaps before I go in that direction, the OP might answer a couple of questions:

 

(1)  You talk about "the guy" who gets furious when you play devil's advocate and argue with him.  Are you talking about one guy and then attempting to  project how that guy reacts on the rest of Thai society?

 

(2)  Another place you refer to your verbal opponents as "Thai lads" and then seemingly also refer to them as "educated people from top universities."  Which is it?

 

(3)  What's your general relationship to these verbal opponents?  Good friends, hardly-know-them-types, or possibly are you in some position of power with them (e.g., a teacher or employer of some type)?

[Guest fountainhall]

It would be far better if those travelling overseas would do their homework before departure. Unlike in the west, where a healthy debate often involves taking opposing views and arguing their merits along with liberal doses of irony, sarcasm and devil's advocacy, Thai culture, like much of Asian culture in general, revolves around harmony and compromise. Being a devil's advocate in your country may be acceptable. In Thailand, it can get you into a lot of trouble. Accept the fact that Thais are very definitely not like you - and you might eventually find yourself getting on just a bit better. But that depends totally on you - not the Thais.

 

 

I know there are this kind of people in every country, but I don't expect educated people from top universities (at least the ones I know) to be like this.

 

GRrrrr...

 

If that's your attitude, you're probably better off staying at home.

[kokopelli]

I am sometimes a devil's advocate because debates are fun and intellectually stimulating.....

Personally I neither like devils nor their advocates although I am enamored of fallen angels.