Guest timmberty Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 some of you may want to pop across to gaytingtong now ... there is a reason why we have not heard from rhodo in a while ... the thread to read is ... 20000000baht .... its yours .. very intresting story .. altho a bit old now . Quote
Bob Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 some of you may want to pop across to gaytingtong now ... there is a reason why we have not heard from rhodo in a while ... the thread to read is ... 20000000baht .... its yours .. very intresting story .. altho a bit old now . Any particular reason why you dig up a 9-month old post to tell us about a poster on another board who hasn't posted there for over 3 months? Quote
kokopelli Posted December 10, 2012 Posted December 10, 2012 From my reading of TingTong post it seems that Rhodo was none other than Douglas, the man who fell to his death from the condo in Bangkok. His last words on this forum/topic were Enjoy This Life. Quote
Guest Jovianmoon Posted December 12, 2012 Posted December 12, 2012 An old thread from March dragged up to announce the passing away of a poster? I can see the connection but I would have thought this might have deserved its own thread, if for no other reason than respectful lamentation (whether Mr Douglas was well liked or not). I didn't know him at all and yet his passing in this way saddens me. With this and the recent passing of Mr Durell in Pattaya, I have to worry about the few expat friends I have in Thailand. The apparently common suicides of expats by jumping is a sensitive issue but maybe it needs more discussion. From what little I understand from various reports, such expats are often seemingly happy one moment and then gone the next. What sorts of things can be done to prevent this? Honestly the whole issue gets me down and I have to admit I'm not that well informed on it - so I won't be the one to start a separate thread. Perhaps someone else... I might then join the discussion, or not. Quote
Rogie Posted December 12, 2012 Posted December 12, 2012 Khun Jovianmoon raises a few fair points. A man we now know (but see my comment below) to have been the poster known as Rhodochrosite leapt to his death on the 21st November and an article appeared in the Pattaya Daily News the following day. That was quickly followed by speculation on at least one gay board that this man was Rhodo, but as far as I was aware at the time this was neither publicly confirmed or disproven. Once it became apparent it was the poster known as Rhodochrosite, although I do not know how or by whom the connection was confirmed, then it might well have been appropriate for someone to post a fresh topic along the lines Jovianmoon mentions. Having said that, I do not think such a topic was necessarily appropriate on this Message Board, Gay Thailand, because Rhodo was a very infrequent poster here and, to be brutally frank, was, at least IMO, rather idiosyncratic - nothing wrong in that in itself of course, but it made it somewhat difficult to warm to him, but even so, it would be nice if someone who did know him in real life was able to give us an insight into the man by which he could be remembered. Quote
kokopelli Posted December 12, 2012 Posted December 12, 2012 An epitaph for Rhodo: Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18 Requiescat in pace; Rhodo Quote
Guest timmberty Posted December 12, 2012 Posted December 12, 2012 the reason i mentioned rhodo in the thread that was already on here (about blogs) (this one) was for one reason and one reason only.. i never knew rhodo posted on here at all, im a new member too and i happened to be reading some of the older threads and noticed one with rhodos name on it (this one) therefor i put on here ,,, could i have started a new thread about it ,,, yes i could have ... and if you want ill start a thread about every jumper where a board member or not .. but i expect id get short thrift if i started doing that .. the guy posted on here wether he was liked or not matters not .. and if people didnt like him or gave a toss as to wether he killed himslef or not .... then just move on .. you dont have to read it . i wasnt overly impressed with how he came across in his gay tingtong blog .. but who knows what he was like in real life .. the poor sods dead now ... who cares ?? not so many it seems and yet if i had said *so what* about the other guy TIM who jumped .. someone ive never met or even read about ... id expect to get loads of abuse .. the joys of gayness i guess. Quote
kokopelli Posted December 12, 2012 Posted December 12, 2012 .. but i expect id get short thrift if i started doing that .. Not to be pedantic, but short shrift is the expression at least according to Will. "Dispatch, my lord; the duke would be at dinner: Make a short shrift; he longs to see your head." Richard III ,,,,and yet if i had said *so what* about the other guy TIM who jumped .. someone ive never met or even read about ... id expect to get loads of abuse .. the joys of gayness i guess. I suppose that Rhodo made more adversaries than friends with many of his posts which resulted in a lack of tributes to him on the forums. Quote
Guest fountainhall Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 I don’t read gay ting tong. I haven’t a clue who the poster Rhodochrosite happened to be. Until this thread was reopened, I only vaguely recalled a few posts on this Board. Also, for the most part, I just don’t care who posters are outside their Board persona (although I have to admit that Beachlover intrigued me, as that poster did most others, I believe). But like Bob and jovianmoon, I fail to understand why there should be any interest on this Board of a poster, who made all of 27 posts here, ceasing to post on another Board where he seems to have been prolific - for whatever reason, sad or otherwise. . . . who knows what he was like in real life .. the poor sods dead now ... who cares ?? not so many it seems . . . Not so many on gay ting tong, I assume. But I think the "who cares ??" comment indeed 'questionable' and a touch insensitive. Because we are all mostly anonymous on these Boards, who knows how his family, friends and others might be feeling about the "poor sods" death? Quote
Bob Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 I asked in a prior post as to what the point was about resurrecting the very old posts about somebody who didn't post here, knowing full well that the poster was eager to tell us about the Rhodo poster without actually saying it. Khun Koko was at least candid in his posts about it. A guy died and my view is similar to Khun FH's above. Let it be and let the guy rest in peace. Taking potshots at him, providing an after-death critique of his posts, and saying "who cares" - especially when you have no personal clue about the guy or his loved ones whatsover- is rather boorish in my opinion and reflects more about the poster than the deceased. Quote
Guest fountainhall Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 And I should have added, did timmberty not say this about the more recent sad suicide in a more recent thread? why on earth is there a row about someone's untimely passing going on on this board ?? i would expect a bit more respect here. I agree - a bit more respect, please. Quote
Guest Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 There were many posts in another thread that went off topic. I have moved them here without deleting or editing anything. You may continue that conversation here. Thank you for being a member of gaythailand.com Quote
Guest fountainhall Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 Thank you for moving these threads and not simply deleting them. Quote
Guest Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 Another "suicide"? Maybe it is best to live at ground level and ensure no one would ever make any financial gains from your premature death. Quote
Rogie Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 Another "suicide"? Maybe it is best to live at ground level . . . In an ideal world I would lead a peaceful life as close to terrra firma as possible, but those towers-in-the-sky are the only way a person with an average income is going to be able to afford to live in many of Thailands's most popular towns and cities. If you want to live in a nice house (rent it, or own via a Thai national) and have just an average income or savings, that can be done in many places but as inevitably they are less in demand and a bit out-of-the-way the local infrastructure such as shops, banks, restaurants, bars, clubs, etc will be poor - you won't find many or maybe not even any on your doorstep. Contrast with Pattaya and Bangkok where you are spoiled for choice. . . . and ensure no one would ever make any financial gains from your premature death. Yes, that does seem to be the motivating factor in many premature deaths (sometimes genuine suicides, sometimes not) but not in Rhodo's case (as far as we can ever know, and none of our business really - although to be fair, it is important ex-pats are aware of the kind of things that can and do happen in Thailand so as hopefully to be better prepared for any eventuality). In the case of the bf of the owner of Funny Boys bar, a man I did not know, the bf in question was believed by some people to have had gambling debts. This raises an interesting and IMO valid point: we have discussed in the past what action, if any, to take over guys who misrepresent themselves on Gay Romeo (just to take one example) or who, having met a farang, then proceed to con him in some way . . . should they be named and shamed, as a kind of 'service' to others in the gay ex-pat community and to gay/bi-sexual farang visitors? Quote
Guest fountainhall Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 . . . what action, if any, to take over guys who misrepresent themselves on Gay Romeo (just to take one example) or who, having met a farang, then proceed to con him in some way . . . should they be named and shamed, as a kind of 'service' to others in the gay ex-pat community and to gay/bi-sexual farang visitors? There's a big problem here, surely. Who do you believe? As for gayromeo, yes, this has been discussed here before and I assume on most other forums. I was challenged once because I proposed caution by saying I never invite anyone from gayromeo to my home on first meeting, unless I happen to know them. It will always be coffee or a drink and a chat first. That gives me time to decide if, in my judgement, I can trust the guy not to flee with whatever in my apartment may be perceived to be of value - or worse. It's far from foolproof, but that's just the way I prefer to play that particular game. For others it's different. But if I felt hard done by to the extent that what was stated on gayromeo was not delivered, the degree of my annoyance might be considerably overstated in anything anti I might write about the guy. Sure, there will be the odd bad apple, and there may well be one on the site intent on much worse than not delivering a stimulating sexual performance. But who does one believe? Equally, if someone were to con me out of a million Baht or whatever, I could make a very loud stink about it by going into personal details and naming names. But could readers ever be sure that in my anger my 'facts' were indeed fact? Could I be over-guilding the lily? Indeed, could my rant be to some extent a way of covering up my own stupidity and my own errors of judgement? Like many guys who live in Thailand, I have occasionally given cash, small amounts, to guys whom I like, for a variety of reasons - many which turned out to be false. And I am not just talking here about money boys - not at all! We tend to laugh at the 'operations for mama' and the 'deaths of water buffalos' (I even once had 'my brother's gambling debts' - and this from a graduate working in a good company). Yet Thais, like most nationalities, can be very persuasive and some expats, knowing this, still wander down that path, if only a little. In one or two cases, I was angry. For a moment I probably wanted to name and shame! But it was ultimately my responsibility. I chose to give the guys the cash. No-one forced me. They chose not to return it, as is usually the case in Thailand. So naming and shaming can easily have downsides as well as up, as it depends on the actual circumstances rather than one side of the story. And when we come to naming and shaming on Boards, how is it possible to determine right and wrong to any reasonable degree, when very few posters actually know anything about any of the real personalities behind the on-screen names? FInally, in the case of those whose sanity is tipped over the edge (literally) and there is only one way out, as was stated on another forum recently dealing with the matter of the alleged suicide of the poor nurse in London, the Chief of the UK Samaritans stressed - "Although a catalyst may appear to be obvious, suicide is never the result of a single factor or event and is likely to have several inter-related causes" Quote
ceejay Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 should they be named and shamed, as a kind of 'service' to others in the gay ex-pat community and to gay/bi-sexual farang visitors? No. How would you know the truth of it? How would you know that it was fair comment and not a vindictive act based on some personal vendetta? How would you give the individual involved the right of reply? How would you protect the board from being accused of libel? TotallyOz 1 Quote
Guest timmberty Posted December 13, 2012 Posted December 13, 2012 I asked in a prior post as to what the point was about resurrecting the very old posts about somebody who didn't post here, knowing full well that the poster was eager to tell us about the Rhodo poster without actually saying it. Khun Koko was at least candid in his posts about it. A guy died and my view is similar to Khun FH's above. Let it be and let the guy rest in peace. Taking potshots at him, providing an after-death critique of his posts, and saying "who cares" - especially when you have no personal clue about the guy or his loved ones whatsover- is rather boorish in my opinion and reflects more about the poster than the deceased. dear bob, do tell me where i have *slagged off* rhodo ... i just used a place where his name was, to post it .. as for the who cares .. your reply to me reopening that post was basically *so what* why bother telling us ... as for your comment fh im sure his family do care .. i was talking about people on the boards . ... you give the impression you wouldnt be to upset who passed on other than the fact you'd not be able to read their posts anymore . so rather than you having a pop at me .. you need to look at yourselves a bit ! you are right, i didnt know the guy .. other than his posts on gaytingtong and another board .. i didnt know wether he posted here much or not .. seems now i do know ... seems i have also found out if a farang takes a leap off a balcony most of you wouldnt give a damn ... lastly i must appologise to bob ... he has taken an instant dislike to me .. must be cause im a newish poster .. and we know a lot of stick in the muds, dont like new blood ... never mind . p.s. ive still not slagged off rhodo .. Quote
Guest Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 And when we come to naming and shaming on Boards, how is it possible to determine right and wrong to any reasonable degree, when very few posters actually know anything about any of the real personalities behind the on-screen names? If someone here is robbed, I prefer to see them report exactly what happened on forums, complete with reference to his GR ID. Then the reader can assess the accuracy of the story based on all the available evidence, including (potentially), previous posts by the same member. I suppose there's a "libel" risk, but in practice not many GR moneyboys will be getting high powered legal teams in. I figure it's much better to post the information, allow members to assess the accuracy of it and avoid being just one more victim of crime. Quote
kokopelli Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 Perhaps unlike other posters I believe that the death of a farang, a member of the gay community, does deserve mention whether or not he was a poster on this forum. If someone wishes to pay tribute or just announce a death, then why not? Death is a once in a lifetime event so a nice, or maybe even irreverent, commentary may shed light upon the deceased's character, life and legacy. TotallyOz 1 Quote
Mysteryman Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 In the case of the bf of the owner of Funny Boys bar, a man I did not know, the bf in question Hmm, was Tim really gay? I read in some thai-newspaper on the net, that his longtime girlfriend, had left him a month ago, and this was the reason. http://tinyurl.com/dy9k6uk Quote
Rogie Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 Hmm, was Tim really gay? I didn't know this gentleman, so I have no idea, but there was a post by GB on Gaybutton Thai timed at 6.59pm on the 9th December that said the newspaper account was incorrect. See: http://www.gaybutton...start=20#p51323 If GB sees this perhaps he can confirm, although I would be very surprised if he'd got it wrong. Quote
Guest timmberty Posted December 14, 2012 Posted December 14, 2012 did this guy tim post on this board ?? i thought id ask so as to save the others from getting upset if he didnt. they dont like to read about non posters here from what i can gather. Quote
kokopelli Posted December 15, 2012 Posted December 15, 2012 I recall no one by the name of Tim posting here. I doubt if he posted under a pseudo name. But the Dear Leader also was not a poster and his death received a lot of attention herein. And The Patriarch Maxim, a man of God, also a non-poster (Maxim not God), was given homage upon his passing. So not being a poster does not preclude their mention or recognition. Quote
