Bar Boys Question

[sudoxi]

This is my first time to Bangkok and Thailand in general. I have read a lot on this forum and got some great advice from posters. 
 

I have been here for a week now did a tour with Mac from siamroads which was great. I just worked up the courage to try some of the Bars. 
 

I went to Fresh Boys on Saturday night. I stayed and watched the show I bought one of the guys who caught my eye a drink then ended up offing him which was a great experience. 
 

the next night I went to Hot Male watched the show however no one really interested me, I felt the place was much smaller than fresh boys and I didn’t like how bright it was. So I ended up back at fresh boys where the show just ended and I saw boy from night before. He came to say hi than he joined the lineup on stage. I ended up buying him drink. I guess the boys talk cause a couple of his friends on stage was trying to get me to off them as well for threesome, however I ended up just offing original boy who was fun again. 

 

onto my question when you buy a drink for one of the boys to sit with you, how long do they usually stay? If you are not interesting in offing how do you politely say thanks for sitting with me but ask them to leave? I think I would ask more boys to sit with me as I would enjoy the company but some of these boys I have no interest in offing.

 

 

also thanks to to the great advice here I was able to negotiate directly my first time, I am still bit nervous at the bars would like to try some others such as Goodboys I tried looking for The One but could not find it. 
 

Thanks for any advice. 

 

[reader]

25 minutes ago, sudoxi said:

I tried looking for The One but could not find it.

Exit Patpong 2 and turn left on to Surawong Rd.

Walk down Surawong Rd. for about 5 minutes until you come to a 7-Eleven. Turn left immediately after passing store on to Soi Tarntawan (not to be confused with entrance to Tarntawan hotel driveway just before 7-Eleven).

You'll find The One on your left a short way down.

[floridarob]

1 hour ago, reader said:

Exit Patpong 2 and turn left on to Surawong Rd.

Walk down Surawong Rd. for above 5 minutes until you come to a 7-Eleven. Turn left immediately after passing store on to Soi Tarntawn (not to be confused with entrance to Tarntawan hotel just before 7-Eleven).

You'll find The One on your left a short way down.

Or you could take a Grab.....

Just kidding...I couldn't resist 😄

[sudoxi]

8 minutes ago, reader said:

Exit Patpong 2 and turn left on to Surawong Rd.

Walk down Surawong Rd. for above 5 minutes until you come to a 7-Eleven. Turn left immediately after passing store on to Soi Tarntawan (not to be confused with entrance to Tarntawan hotel driveway just before 7-Eleven).

You'll find The One on your left a short way down.

Thank you, was able to understand where it is on map now. I was heading the wrong direction, maybe I will give it a try tonight.

 

 

[CallMeLee]

22 minutes ago, sudoxi said:

when you buy a drink for one of the boys to sit with you, how long do they usually stay? If you are not interesting in offing how do you politely say thanks for sitting with me but ask them to leave? I think I would ask more boys to sit with me as I would enjoy the company but some of these boys I have no interest in offing.

Not a definitive answer but based from experience:

They will stay as long as you keep the drinks flowing (which can be pricey unless you avail of their bottle service). They will leave everytime they have to do their stage work as their endgame is to be offed. 

Once the topic of being offed is breached and there's mutual understanding that it will not progress to that stage, handing them a tip is the universal code for saying thanks and you are sending them back to rotation.

[sudoxi]

1 minute ago, CallMeLee said:

Not a definitive answer but based from experience:

They will stay as long as you keep the drinks flowing (which can be pricey unless you avail of their bottle service). They will leave everytime they have to do their stage work as their endgame is to be offed. 

Once the topic of being offed is breached and there's mutual understanding that it will not progress to that stage, handing them a tip is the universal code for saying thanks and you are sending them back to rotation.

Thank you. This seems perfect for me, give them tip and thank them. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it.  
 

I did see one guy getting bottle service last night at hotmale he did have 5-7 of the guys joining him for drinks

[vinapu]

14 minutes ago, sudoxi said:

 maybe I will give it a try tonight.

 

 

would be nice if you report here your findings  about the bar and boys

[Verchiele]

1 hour ago, sudoxi said:

Thank you. This seems perfect for me, give them tip and thank them. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it.  
 

I did see one guy getting bottle service last night at hotmale he did have 5-7 of the guys joining him for drinks

What would ne the common tip just to send them on their way. I suppose here 200-500baht is sufficient? (Depending how long they chatted of course)

[Londoner]

3 hours ago, vinapu said:

would be nice if you report here your findings  about the bar and boys

Yes, please do. The "fresh" views of a newbie would fascinate me. 

[CallMeLee]

3 hours ago, Verchiele said:

What would ne the common tip just to send them on their way. I suppose here 200-500baht is sufficient? (Depending how long they chatted of course)

Yeah. Will depend mostly on the duration. I know some customers who will stay cuddled up with their chosen guy for the entire night without intention to off. I'm hoping the boy will receive a tip commensurate to that.

In my case, doing the vibe check, due diligence, expectation setting etc. doesn't take so much time. So if they failed the vibe check within the first 10 minutes, I immediately send them back to rotation with a 100 baht note.

If I may add a question - what's the expectation when you call a guy from stage to join you? Should you buy him drink immediately or is it alright to chat for a few minutes to decide if you want him to stay for drinks?

[Keithambrose]

6 hours ago, sudoxi said:

This is my first time to Bangkok and Thailand in general. I have read a lot on this forum and got some great advice from posters. 
 

I have been here for a week now did a tour with Mac from siamroads which was great. I just worked up the courage to try some of the Bars. 
 

I went to Fresh Boys on Saturday night. I stayed and watched the show I bought one of the guys who caught my eye a drink then ended up offing him which was a great experience. 
 

the next night I went to Hot Male watched the show however no one really interested me, I felt the place was much smaller than fresh boys and I didn’t like how bright it was. So I ended up back at fresh boys where the show just ended and I saw boy from night before. He came to say hi than he joined the lineup on stage. I ended up buying him drink. I guess the boys talk cause a couple of his friends on stage was trying to get me to off them as well for threesome, however I ended up just offing original boy who was fun again. 

 

onto my question when you buy a drink for one of the boys to sit with you, how long do they usually stay? If you are not interesting in offing how do you politely say thanks for sitting with me but ask them to leave? I think I would ask more boys to sit with me as I would enjoy the company but some of these boys I have no interest in offing.

 

 

also thanks to to the great advice here I was able to negotiate directly my first time, I am still bit nervous at the bars would like to try some others such as Goodboys I tried looking for The One but could not find it. 
 

Thanks for any advice. 

 

You were lucky to be offered  a 3some, comments on this forum indicate  that is not so common! Assuming you fancied the boys, I would have accepted the offer with open arms, and everything else open!

[jason1975]

1 hour ago, Keithambrose said:

You were lucky to be offered  a 3some, comments on this forum indicate  that is not so common! Assuming you fancied the boys, I would have accepted the offer with open arms, and everything else open!

Me too! I would have said yes!

[Keithambrose]

9 minutes ago, jason1975 said:

Me too! I would have said yes!

I must make sure I go there in November!

[vinapu]

2 hours ago, CallMeLee said:

 

If I may add a question - what's the expectation when you call a guy from stage to join you? Should you buy him drink immediately or is it alright to chat for a few minutes to decide if you want him to stay for drinks?

usually as soon as boy will sit with you , waiter or mamasan approaches you with drink question, ready to take order , leaving you with little more options than order one.

Of course if you choose to do dry interview first y can do it but be ready to be pestered with oy drink question every 44 seconds or so.

Sometimes if boy in question is known to me I make him sitting with me  without drink for a while , in such case i make sure his tip is much higher than usual. Speaking human it means instead of spending 400-500 on boys drink I rather  give that money to him as a tip.

If I subsequently off invited boy , no tip for sitting with me as his reward will be paid in the room.

If I'm sure I off the boy called I don't buy him a drink but ask him to dress and off we go-that usually happens with known quality.

 

[Londoner]

It is good manners to buy a drink for him, even if you choose not to pursue interest. He is a worker; time not on the podium is time and possibly money, lost.

It is a rather different matter if a pushy mamasam imposes a guy on you. Or two, as once happened to me in Bangkok. However, on that occasion I was such a softie that I did give the guys  tips, surmising that the mamasan may have been concerned that they weren't very popular and needed a helping hand.

However,   being a softie costs so beware! It's really  a case of "up to you."

[floridarob]

3 hours ago, vinapu said:

Sometimes if boy in question is known to me I make him sitting with me  without drink for a while , in such case i make sure his tip is much higher than usual. Speaking human it means instead of spending 400-500 on boys drink I rather  give that money to him as a tip.

I ask the guy, you want drink or prefer the cash ....100% reply. money is better 

[Olddaddy]

12 hours ago, sudoxi said:

I have been here for a week now did a tour with Mac from siamroads which was great.

May I ask what places you went to see with Mac?

[Olddaddy]

11 hours ago, floridarob said:

Or you could take a Grab.....

Just kidding...I couldn't resist 😄

I did take a Grab from Tartawan to Balcony then worked out later  it was a 5 minutes walk😂

[floridarob]

1 minute ago, Olddaddy said:

I did take a Grab from Tartawan to Balcony then worked out later  it was a 5 minutes walk😂

I think I remember reading about that somewhere......🧐

[jamiebee]

1 hour ago, floridarob said:

I ask the guy, you want drink or prefer the cash ....100% reply. money is better 

This true. I was in Tawan(The One) in last year and I had a boy from Myanmar sit with me almost every time I was there and I always buy him a drink. But one time he said it's better to give him direct as a tip and no need to buy him boy drink since they are not getting much from the bar for the drinks bought for them. I was there by April when the bar is full during shows but very less offs happening.

[jason1975]

26 minutes ago, jamiebee said:

This true. I was in Tawan(The One) in last year and I had a boy from Myanmar sit with me almost every time I was there and I always buy him a drink. But one time he said it's better to give him direct as a tip and no need to buy him boy drink since they are not getting much from the bar for the drinks bought for them. I was there by April when the bar is full during shows but very less offs happening.

While the guys prefer cash tips, the bar wants customers to buy them drinks. That's why sometimes I order a bottle of whisky and I can get many guys around me to drink. Of course I tip him after that.

[reader]

3 hours ago, floridarob said:

I ask the guy, you want drink or prefer the cash ....100% reply. money is better 

You know you've won when farang gives you money. 🙂

[BL8gPt]

 Do the boys get anything from the bar when they join a customer and drink from the bottle?

[macaroni21]

20 hours ago, Verchiele said:

What would ne the common tip just to send them on their way. I suppose here 200-500baht is sufficient? (Depending how long they chatted of course)

Unless one is the extremely indecisive sort, most of us will be able to get a sense within 10 mnutes whether the boy sitting beside is compatible/attractive enough for taking off. 100 baht is the going rate (at least that's the rate I apply and have not met with any demurral). If he has sat for longer, say, > 20 minutes, maybe 200 baht. It would be unfair to his chances of getting another customer if he is expected to sit for more than 20 - 25 minutes.

Also, as mentioned above, when it's his turn to go back to the rotation on stage he will tell you. E.g. when he says "I go dancing now," it is also code for "So, are you taking me off or not?" If you tip him, it's clear. He won't come back. If you don't tip, he may still not come back (even if the drink isn't finished) and you'll get a reputation in the bar as a tightfisted customer.  On the other hand, if you say "Yes, please put on your clothes," then he won't go on stage, but directly to the changing room. You don't have to tip him, since you'll be paying him big later.

Buying a drink for a boy has little monetary value to him. It varies from bar to bar, but typically, he gets 50 baht out of the 500 baht you'll be charged for the glass. 

4 hours ago, BL8gPt said:

Do the boys get anything from the bar when they join a customer and drink from the bottle?

I doubt it, but since I never buy bottles, I don't know.  What if a customer calls the entire bar over (say 30 boys) to his table. Is the bar going to have to share its takings with all of them? The economics speak against it.

[sudoxi]

4 hours ago, BL8gPt said:

 Do the boys get anything from the bar when they join a customer and drink from the bottle?

I wonder this too. At fresh boys when they bring boy drink they bring slip for boy to keep, I guess to redeem his commission, I haven’t seen this with bottles, maybe it’s the hop that if the guy is spending big on bottle he is more likely to off one? I have seen with the bottles the mamasan/papasan keeps making drinks from the bottles for the boys and the customers I guess to finish it off faster, when I was at good boys I was disappointed cause the one boy I liked was with a guy who bought a bottle but it didn’t look like the transaction was gonna go farther than a drink.