"Straight" masseurs and go-go boys

[Verchiele]

In reviewing massage parlor catalogue, I would say 95%+ of boys listed there as straight (take SK shops for instance across the board) . Although some are even listed as straight but can bottom interestingly.  

- I read somewhere in Thailand the word straight does not necessarily mean sexual orientation but rather mannerism? (versus being feminine). 

- I feel like at least 30%-40% of boys in the industry is at the very least bisexual. I cannot imagine just how sustainable a real straight guy fare in the industry (although they could be continual revolving door)

- Does it even matter in the end if you feel you are with a real straight person versus a gay guy. Does it effect your experience at all? 

 

 

[Foolish]

2 hours ago, Verchiele said:

In reviewing massage parlor catalogue, I would say 95%+ of boys listed there as straight (take SK shops for instance across the board) . Although some are even listed as straight but can bottom interestingly.  

- I read somewhere in Thailand the word straight does not necessarily mean sexual orientation but rather mannerism? (versus being feminine). 

- I feel like at least 30%-40% of boys in the industry is at the very least bisexual. I cannot imagine just how sustainable a real straight guy fare in the industry (although they could be continual revolving door)

- Does it even matter in the end if you feel you are with a real straight person versus a gay guy. Does it effect your experience at all? 

 

 

I don't really care whether the person is gay or not...I'm not pursuing a relationship. As long as they don't cringe from me or act disinterested and bored, I'm won't be bothered. However, if they are gay, it'll be a bonus. 

[vinapu]

6 hours ago, Foolish said:

However, if they are gay, it'll be a bonus. 

and a boner

[Keithambrose]

30 minutes ago, vinapu said:

and a boner

There has been a lengthy discussion  of this issue under another heading. I don't want to repeat all the arguments.  I just want to say that if a guy genuinely  is happy to have sex with you, OK for money, and performs well, then I am not concerned  if he identifies as straight or gay. If you get good sex, and he is happy, then it doesn't  matter if he goes home to his wife and kids, as many do. You might say that you get better sex with a guy who identifies as gay, but I don't think that is always the case. I don't ask a guy if he identifies as gay or straight,  I ask if he is happy with the type of sex I want,  for the relevant time. Philosophical issues on the meaning of 'straight', can be left over!

[Foolish]

38 minutes ago, Keithambrose said:

There has been a lengthy discussion  of this issue under another heading. I don't want to repeat all the arguments.  I just want to say that if a guy genuinely  is happy to have sex with you, OK for money, and performs well, then I am not concerned  if he identifies as straight or gay. If you get good sex, and he is happy, then it doesn't  matter if he goes home to his wife and kids, as many do. You might say that you get better sex with a guy who identifies as gay, but I don't think that is always the case. I don't ask a guy if he identifies as gay or straight,  I ask if he is happy with the type of sex I want,  for the relevant time. Philosophical issues on the meaning of 'straight', can be left over!

Exactly, I don't care who he go back to as long as he make me happy in the short time we have 🤭

[Keithambrose]

33 minutes ago, Foolish said:

Exactly, I don't care who he go back to as long as he make me happy in the short time we have 🤭

Or long-time, as Vinapu  would point out!

[omega]

For me, they should enjoy the work.

In an ideal world, everyone would do work that they enjoy.

In making certain choices, I can encourage that ideal world to exist. Or at least pretend to myself it does.

That said, reality is reality. Someone doing sex work who doesn't enjoy doing sex work is being exploited. But is the exploitation different if someone who doesn't enjoy mining for cobalt or diamonds or whatever, does so because the altenative is starving to death?

[Keithambrose]

38 minutes ago, omega said:

For me, they should enjoy the work.

In an ideal world, everyone would do work that they enjoy.

In making certain choices, I can encourage that ideal world to exist. Or at least pretend to myself it does.

That said, reality is reality. Someone doing sex work who doesn't enjoy doing sex work is being exploited. But is the exploitation different if someone who doesn't enjoy mining for cobalt or diamonds or whatever, does so because the altenative is starving to death?

As I said, I left aside philosophical issues, which are complex and would fill books, indeed already have! I did say in my post, ' if he was happy...".

[reader]

2 hours ago, Keithambrose said:

There has been a lengthy discussion  of this issue under another heading. I don't want to repeat all the arguments.  I just want to say that if a guy genuinely  is happy to have sex with you, OK for money, and performs well, then I am not concerned  if he identifies as straight or gay

+1

[omega]

1 hour ago, Keithambrose said:

As I said, I left aside philosophical issues, which are complex and would fill books, indeed already have! I did say in my post, ' if he was happy...".

Sure, but I said "For me...". It's my view on it, and I'm happy to discuss the philosphical issues

[caeron]

If they perform and make me feel like they enjoyed fucking, I'm fine. Doesn't matter how they identify.

None of them are going to fuck me without a pay day, so what difference should it make to me? Do some people really hold the fantasy that these guys are secretly hot for you? That if they're gay they'll fall for you? The only thing they're going to fall for is your wallet. 

Every couple of years we get some sad story about someone who fell for a money boy and it ended exactly like you'd think it would. 

Fuck with the little head, don't think with it.

[vinapu]

14 hours ago, Keithambrose said:

Or long-time, as Vinapu  would point out!

indeed. I'm not asking them how they label themselves but noticed that those who stick to the "straight' label tend to be more business oriented and less inclined to look for exceptions and excuses but tend to stick to they promised or committed themselves to . In short more prone to do good job  they are paid for.

[bkkmfj2648]

5 hours ago, vinapu said:

indeed. I'm not asking them how they label themselves but noticed that those who stick to the "straight' label tend to be more business oriented and less inclined to look for exceptions and excuses but tend to stick to they promised or committed themselves to . In short more prone to do good job  they are paid for.

Excellent observation.

I will further add, that when they are gay - it starts to get more into the areas of:

• who are you dating?,
• why are you paying for MBs?,
• why are you single?

for me - this is too much drama - just let us keep it fun without too much deviation from what was agreed to.  If we agree to see each other many more times - then I might be willing to answer the above questions.

Straight or bi guys just don't care and I never feel like there has been an invasion of privacy - especially for this type of transaction.

[Verchiele]

17 hours ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

Excellent observation.

I will further add, that when they are gay - it starts to get more into the areas of:

• who are you dating?,
• why are you paying for MBs?,
• why are you single?

for me - this is too much drama - just let us keep it fun without too much deviation from what was agreed to.  If we agree to see each other many more times - then I might be willing to answer the above questions.

Straight or bi guys just don't care and I never feel like there has been an invasion of privacy - especially for this type of transaction.

Thats a spot on observation… valid even when I was at random massage parlor in Bali… “is the guy outside your br?”,,,

[jason1975]

On 9/26/2024 at 10:49 AM, vinapu said:

indeed. I'm not asking them how they label themselves but noticed that those who stick to the "straight' label tend to be more business oriented and less inclined to look for exceptions and excuses but tend to stick to they promised or committed themselves to . In short more prone to do good job  they are paid for.

I agree. But being straight, the experience with them is not the same as with gay or bi guy.

[Londoner]

A difficult subject. It wasn't an issue for me when I was a newbie but it  became one over the years, not because of the physical reactions of the two of us but due to my emotional responses to what was happening, both during and after the event.

This maybe because  I'd  lived "straight" until my forty-fifth year and from then onwards, ninety percent plus of my gay sexual life was in Thailand, with mbs. I'm not a rarity in this regard; many of the falang guys I met in Pattaya in the late 90s were the same as me in  in age, background and experiences.  The transition from a repressed sexuality to the freedom and enjoyment of expression was wonderful. And complex.

In those days, the years before I met my partner, I looked for, perhaps even needed, an element of reciprocity, even if at some level I accepted that it all was part of the game.  My  partner admitting to not being gay would have complicated this. I knew it was an illusion and that truth was often concealed. But it was what I required emotionally.

Younger gay men may not always remember the struggles my generation went through when what we most deeply  desired was declared both illegal and wicked and  that disclosure would have resulted in a term in prison  and ended my career. 

In some respects, we remain marked by this even in our joyful liberation, a liberation for which I shall always remain grateful to Thailand. And its mbs.  

[Vessey]

32 minutes ago, Londoner said:

A difficult subject. It wasn't an issue for me when I was a newbie but it  became one over the years, not because of the physical reactions of the two of us but due to my emotional responses to what was happening, both during and after the event.

This maybe because  I'd  lived "straight" until my forty-fifth year and from then onwards, ninety percent plus of my gay sexual life was in Thailand, with mbs. I'm not a rarity in this regard; many of the falang guys I met in Pattaya in the late 90s were the same as me in  in age, background and experiences.  The transition from a repressed sexuality to the freedom and enjoyment of expression was wonderful. And complex.

In those days, the years before I met my partner, I looked for, perhaps even needed, an element of reciprocity, even if at some level I accepted that it all was part of the game.  My  partner admitting to not being gay would have complicated this. I knew it was an illusion and that truth was often concealed. But it was what I required emotionally.

Younger gay men may not always remember the struggles my generation went through when what we most deeply  desired was declared both illegal and wicked and  that disclosure would have resulted in a term in prison  and ended my career. 

In some respects, we remain marked by this even in our joyful liberation, a liberation for which I shall always remain grateful to Thailand. And its mbs.  

Excellent post, I am now into my 70s and this mirrors my own experience back in the UK. Pattaya was my liberation, with the slow release of the closet door as my confidence grew. Even so the gay side to my nature is still only known to a few back in the UK.

But back to the topic, I split my time in Pattaya between 'straight' boys and gays, and usually its a top v bottom distinction as well. Some of the tops arrive at my room already, as they strip off, visibly 'ready, willing and able' to perform the task in hand.  Many are happy to kiss, suck, and, in rare instances, bottom as well. Some need to watch (or pretend to need to watch) hetro porn on their phone as they fuck you, some do not. Some perform with obvious enthusiasm and seem to be enjoying what they do. Some straight guys will be grabbing a towel and heading off to the shower seconds after they have cum and disengaged, while others will linger, cuddle, and try and get you off if you haven't done already. 

There are so many different scenarios depending on the individual boy. But as a consequence, some are invited back time after time, and holiday after holiday, while others are thanked, paid and forgotten. 

So I don't think there is a simple answer to the actual sexuality or bi-sexuality of Pattaya's straight boys, they each fit within a broad spectrum (as do we all as customers I suspect). My preference is for those that at least appear to enjoy their 'work'. 

 

[macaroni21]

3 hours ago, Vessey said:

There are so many different scenarios depending on the individual boy. But as a consequence, some are invited back time after time, and holiday after holiday, while others are thanked, paid and forgotten. 

So I don't think there is a simple answer to the actual sexuality or bi-sexuality of Pattaya's straight boys, they each fit within a broad spectrum (as do we all as customers I suspect). My preference is for those that at least appear to enjoy their 'work'. 

Agree +1, though I would have phrased the last part slightly differently to give more nuance to the words "appear to enjoy" - Preference for those that are smart and intuitive enough to give the illusion that they like and appreciate the time with me.

[spoon]

My main criteria for repeat is not rushing when they are with me. Thats a first tell thats the guy is comfortable with me and not looking for an excuse to leave as soon as they can. One of the main reason i prefer LT is because of this. That said, the few that i deemed ST worthy, even when they dont rush, if after few meetings, it doesnt leads to LT, then ill move on as well. Of course exception is for massage guys, where i do have a stable of regulars ive been too simply because their massage skills and anything extras is bonus. Almost always, the extras with these masseurs gets progressively better over time.

[jason1975]

1 hour ago, spoon said:

My main criteria for repeat is not rushing when they are with me. Thats a first tell thats the guy is comfortable with me and not looking for an excuse to leave as soon as they can. One of the main reason i prefer LT is because of this. That said, the few that i deemed ST worthy, even when they dont rush, if after few meetings, it doesnt leads to LT, then ill move on as well. Of course exception is for massage guys, where i do have a stable of regulars ive been too simply because their massage skills and anything extras is bonus. Almost always, the extras with these masseurs gets progressively better over time.

What better extras are there? Would like to find out! Hehe

[spoon]

26 minutes ago, jason1975 said:

What better extras are there? Would like to find out! Hehe

Depends. Usually first few meets, some have restrictions on what they can do or cant do, but over times, suddenly they surprise me with willingness to do more. Some, it was me who afraid to do too much at first, and after few meets, surprised that they dont mind me exploring further lol

The select few take things further with other than bedroom activites. Movies, dinner, vacations etc. 

[jason1975]

24 minutes ago, spoon said:

The select few take things further with other than bedroom activites. Movies, dinner, vacations etc. 

Movies, dinner and vacations? I would have assumed more hard-core bedroom activities!!!

[spoon]

33 minutes ago, jason1975 said:

Movies, dinner and vacations? I would have assumed more hard-core bedroom activities!!!

Those are still within bedroom activities lol

[Verchiele]

As someone that grew up in Asian country, I know what it feels like being a closeted gay man! (I am now in my mid 30s)

I wonder what is the gay perception in Thailand is despite it being legalized in society. Here is one such fact

“A 2019 UNDP survey showed that 53% of LGBT respondents had faced verbal harassment, 16% have been sexually assaulted, and 42% have pretended to be straight in order to be accepted in various settings. 47.5% of the respondents had experienced at least one form of discrimination from within their family. As a result of stigma and discrimination, 49% of the LGBT respondents said that they have contemplated suicide, and 17% that they had attempted to take their lives.”

So despite it being legalized, Thais still face societal repercussions for their sexual preference. I think this would contribute to the fact that many Thais (incl masseurs and gogo boys) would identify as “straight” but not necessarily so behind closed doors. 

Alas, its good to understand that despite all of what is known about Bangkok being gay capital of the world, the society is still much more conservative than what we are used to in the west.

[Keithambrose]

21 hours ago, jason1975 said:

I agree. But being straight, the experience with them is not the same as with gay or bi guy.

I don't find that so. I've had great sex with boys who have a wife and child. Mind that then comes back to what is meant by straight!