The large segment that is bisexual

[bkkmfj2648]

4 hours ago, vinapu said:

quite a few of the best guys of my recent, say post-covid trips  turned out to me married , engaged , fathered children etc and still did excellent job perusing my stamp collection and not being inhibited in any way. Whether they liked it or just  successfully tried to do best job they were hired for,  is , from my point of view , irrelevant.

I could not agree more @vinapu

In fact, if you think about how many of us during our work careers had to do and fulfill jobs that we did not like - but we did it anyway because we needed the money and/or work status.

I would imagine that it is the same for many of the "straight" guys who put themselves out there for us to play with.  However, I would argue that they are not doing it for the status but only for the money.

With the various "straight" guys that I have become close to over the years that were my sexual service providers - they almost all had these attributes in common:

• they needed the money - often because their female partner/wife had financially demanding needs,
• if they had a good feeling with their customer - they often preferred to stay only with a close select group of customers that treated them well,
• they could sometimes experience sexual activities that were a fantasy for them - good blow job, good tight ass to fuck, or as one "straight" guy told me - give me the one thing that my wife cannot give me - a HARD dick in my ass to massage my prostrate to give me a mind blowing orgasm.  I used to always tease him and say - well then you are gay and he would say - NO - I love the beauty of women - but these women cannot fuck me good in the ass.

What is something that a gay man would want from a straight guy that another gay guy could not give him ?

 

[unicorn]

1 hour ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

• ... one "straight" guy told me - give me the one thing that my wife cannot give me - a HARD dick in my ass to massage my prostrate to give me a mind blowing orgasm...

You were right to put "straight" in quotes. Somehow, when I look up heterosexual in the dictionary, the definition of "Someone who likes a hard dick in his ass to give him a mind-blowing orgasm" doesn't pop up. I don't have any straight friends who get mind-blowing orgasms from taking dicks ups their asses. Actions speak larger than words. These people are bi or gay, not straight. If they really love the beauty of women, in a sexual way, that is, they're bi. If they enjoy the beauty of women the way I can enjoy the beauty of a field of flowers (in a non-sexual way), they're gay. 

[unicorn]

1 hour ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

• ...I love the beauty of women - but these women cannot fuck me good in the ass...

Perhaps my favorite drag queen is Ella Vaday. I love her/his beauty as a woman (in a non-sexual way) and as a man (in a sexual way).

 

[reader]

8 hours ago, unicorn said:

However, if the man truly enjoys the sex, he is not straight. Period. If a man who says he's straight then states you gave him great sex, either he's a great actor, or you  can't tell when someone's acting, or he was never straight to begin with. I have zero delusions on being able to show a straight man a great time in the sack. Other people seem to get off on these delusions, however.  

You've become obsessed with telling other people what their orientation is or isn't. I don't believe it's my place to do that so I accept what each individual tells me.

If you want to play pop psychologist and insist you know their sexuality better than they do, knock yourself out and babble on. But please don't tell readers that they're delusional. That's a state on consciousness you've successfully carved out for yourself.

 

 

[vinapu]

6 hours ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

 

What is something that a gay man would want from a straight guy that another gay guy could not give him ?

 

Going for Grand Palace or Asiatique visit with his children and playing good uncle spoiling kids?

[vinapu]

6 hours ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

 

• they could sometimes experience sexual activities that were a fantasy for them - good blow job, good tight ass to fuck, or as one "straight" guy told me - give me the one thing that my wife cannot give me - a HARD dick in my ass to massage my prostrate to give me a mind blowing orgasm.  I used to always tease him and say - well then you are gay and he would say - NO - I love the beauty of women - but these women cannot fuck me good in the ass.

 

that reminds me story from our forum, one I already told to few and perhaps even mentioned here before .

Member mentioned casually in report  he f***d guy. From narrative I thought I knew the guy in question  and   he confirmed, yes , that is the one.

I did not comment thinking " yeah, right, you f***d XYZ, what else? ", guy is straight as arrow and doesn't even like his ass touched. But I said nothing to ruin that 'fantasy" IMHO

Lo and behold few months  later I'm in Bangkok, offed guy in question , not for first time , and we had some talk as always during which he told me about customer he had , they had drink or three and he let him to use his , as he said ' back door, and you know what vinapu ? I liked it "

[vinapu]

9 hours ago, unicorn said:

Somehow, when I look up heterosexual in the dictionary, the definition of "Someone who likes a hard dick in his ass to give him a mind-blowing orgasm" doesn't pop up.

...................................

I don't have any straight friends who get mind-blowing orgasms from taking dicks ups their asses. 

 

Perhaps you need to visit bookstore and purchase more contemporary dictionary ? One from 50ties or 60-ties while still serve purpose may be bit outdated.

................................

While I understand your position lets not over do it. Mind blowing orgasms from whatever source may not really be coffee table subject of talk between friends , specially in one of them is known gay or , even worse is  a gay but thinks no straight friend knows it. I kind of suspect you don't share with your straight friends source of your own mind blowing orgasms either.

Personal note - obviously we members here share our favorite hobby . At last count I met at least 37 members, some many times over and spent with them hours and even days. If I can label their preferred  sex role  of 10 of them that's probably overestimation. We enjoy sex in different forms but not necessarily feel compulsion to itemize what we like the most, specially when talking with friends but also other hobbyists. "Combing over stamp collection"  or "discussing world peace" does the trick neatly to sustain conversation.

[unicorn]

6 hours ago, reader said:

You've become obsessed with telling other people what their orientation is or isn't. I don't believe it's my place to do that so I accept what each individual tells me..

Well, I guess you believe everything George Santos and Donald Trump say, because you believe you have to accept as fact whatever others tell you. There are certainly tens of millions in your camp, who are active MAGA supporters. Obviously, there are matters of fact and matters of opinion. When Trump says "The election was stolen," I cannot read his mind to know whether he actually believes what he's saying (i.e. he's deluded), or he's intentionally fabricating (i.e. he's lying). But I do know that the statement is factually wrong, along with countless other factually incorrect statements he makes (Haitian immigrants eating pets, and so on). Although I'm pretty sure he's simply lying, I recognize that my belief that he's a liar is an opinion. I do know for a fact, however, that he makes tons of factually incorrect statements, whether it's due to delusional thinking or mendacity. 

If a man gets mind-blowing orgasms from men fucking him up the ass, it's simply a fact that he's not straight--not a matter of opinion, and regardless of what the man says. Many years ago, US Senator Lindsey Graham paid my husband good money for sex, so I know for a fact that, regardless of his statements to the contrary, he's not straight. I also strongly believe that he's lying when he says he is. That does not mean I need to confront anyone who says he's straight, even if I know what he's saying isn't true. What I do accept is the fact that this is the way he presents himself. 

However, if one looks up the definition of heterosexual today, 2024, one gets a pretty straight-forward (so to speak) definition:

Facts are facts. I'm not so foolish as to believe everything a person tells me, even when there's firm as steel evidence to the contrary.

[unicorn]

7 hours ago, reader said:

...I accept what each individual tells me...

 

[unicorn]

[bkkmfj2648]

9 hours ago, unicorn said:

Many years ago, US Senator Lindsey Graham paid my husband good money for sex, so I know for a fact that, regardless of his statements to the contrary, he's not straight. I also strongly believe that he's lying when he says he is.

wow - amazing tidbit!! 

[bkkmfj2648]

In keeping with the theme of this thread created by @macaroni21, a random feed came up on my Youtube feed of an interview by someone I do not know, Tommie McDonald, former porn producer I believe in the UK, who now is a podcaster, of his channel, Offbeat - Tommie, @Offbeatme on Twitter (X) and on the web at: https://offbeatshow.com/

In this Youtube video he interviewed, Dr. Joe Kort, PhD, LMSW, who I have been following for years, as he is my hero - as he invented the new sexual position category of SIDE, thus liberating us sides who were formerly stuck in the TOP closet.  https://joekort.com/

 

 

I found this Youtube video fascinating and it answers many of the questions brought up in our forum thread.

Let me know what you all think?

I also learned a new terminology = cashsexual = where a person is turned on by money if you pay them to have sex - discussed in the video at minute = 6:44

Enjoy.

p.s. I did not know who Tommie McDonald was so I read a Metro UK article about him:  https://metro.co.uk/2022/07/05/13-questions-youve-always-wanted-to-ask-a-male-sex-worker-answered-16900821/

 

[floridarob]

5 hours ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

I also learned a new terminology = cashsexual = where a person is turned on by money if you pay them to have sex

And I get turned on by paying and getting done what I want.... I have lots of free hook ups, just not the same when after I nutt I have to continue to please the other person, paying is so much simpler, lol

[unicorn]

5 hours ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

...Dr. Joe Kort, PhD, LMSW,,,

Let me know what you all think?

I also learned a new terminology = cashsexual = ....

 

Wow. Looking at that man's internet footprint, he certainly seems fixated about this subject, for some reason. 🙄Yes, it is true that a sexual act in an of itself doesn't define a person's sexual orientation. Obviously, if a man has sex with another man for purely financial gain (escorting, porn flics, etc.), and he's fantasizing about a woman while having sex with men, yes, he's straight. However, if a man actually enjoys sex with other men (and isn't fantasizing about a woman while having sex with another man), then he's either bi or gay. He may be more on the straight spectrum of bisexuality, but he's bisexual nonetheless. It may be that most people are bisexual to some extent, and that my (and a majority of my friends) being gay is far more unusual than bisexuality. Speaking for myself, there's is no way I could get aroused by a woman, though I might be able to fantasize about a man and perform if I had to (haven't tried so far). 

And, once again, how a person "self-identifies," or presents himself to others, is not the same as his actual sexual orientation (which may be a mystery, even to him). 

[Raposa]

11 hours ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

 

I found this Youtube video fascinating and it answers many of the questions brought up in our forum thread.

Let me know what you all think?

 

The YouTube video was a refreshing take on the subject that looked at the issue from a non-activist angle.

[unicorn]

Well, the words "heterosexual" and "bisexual" have strict definitions, so it's not really a matter of how one chooses to "look at it." No rambling 45 minute discourse will change the definitions or words. As noted above, a heterosexual is someone whose sexual or romantic attractions are purely with those of the opposite gender. If there is any "fluidity," or attractions to both genders (either sexual or romantic), then the person is bisexual, whether he chooses to identify himself as such or not. These are simply matters of how the terms are defined.

A person may call himself "heterofluid," or "heteroflexible," but if he is capable of attraction to either men or women, he's bisexual, by definition. Whether he likes it or not. 

[reader]

I don't ask the men I meet whether they're gay or straight--or something in between.

If one of them chooses to tell me, I accept what he says simply because I'm inclined to believe he probably has a better handle on it than me.

 

[bkkmfj2648]

Interesting 

 

[reader]

He left out reason #6: they're in for the money and looking for customers. 🙂

[unicorn]

On 10/9/2024 at 6:38 AM, reader said:

He left out reason #6: they're in for the money and looking for customers. 🙂

I've known men who've been banned from that app due to compensation being suggested... I'd think it wouldn't take that long before getting caught.