Have you ever been threatened for being gay?

[Guest taylorsquare]

Well.......I was walking down the street in my own City a few weeks ago with my young boyish girlish looking Japanese flatmate.

It was an area around several gay venues.

Stopping at a pedestrian crossing,we had a carload of young guys drive past shouting things ,i presume at us,from their car windows.

They had their fun and kept driving.No harm done,went in one ear and out the other.

 

Possibly if i shouted back or done hand signals it may have ended differently.

 

Only on one occassion can i remember in pattaya where i felt threatened by gay violence was in a baht bus when two shaved head german guys got in when i was sitting with a ladyboy i had offed.

They both sat near the back whilst we were up the front so when we got out we had to go past them,as went to get out he tried to stick his beer bottle .......you know where,then abused me,i presume in german,before spitting at me ,got me in the side of the face,whilst i was walking towards the driver.

I ignored them ,otherwise they both would have probaly turned on me.

 

im always much more vigilant on my safety especially if im with a youngish looking guy or ladyboy.

I probaly would not walk thru walking street in the early hours of the morning with a boyish looking guy.

im not sure about other cities around the world.

Obviously Bahrain or Dubai would not be a good idea.

How many of you know how to protect yourself if crunch came to crunch.

Do you think its important for you to know some boxing or martial arts if your openly gay?

[Guest lvdkeyes]

Many many years ago I was walking with 2 other gay friends when 4 guys started to cross the street toward us. I said to my friends, "here comes trouble". Just as the reached us one of them tried to throw his jacket over my head. I managed to get away from the jack and caught him in a headlock, while my friends took off running and the three other guys after them. I managed to punch the guy I had in a headlock 3-4 times before I released him and took off myself. When I got home my "friends" were there. I was splattered with blood, but didn't have a scratch on me. I had followed my older brother's advice. "If a group attacks you, get a hold of one and pound the shit out of him." It worked.

[Guest xiandarkthorne]

Wow! Bravo Lvdkeyes - remind me never to get into a cat spat with you! I usually try to avoid trouble myself but when push comes to shove, yeah, I agree with you. My personal philosophy is never to turn my back on on a troublemaker, make sure I get in the first blow, make it count and end the matter then and there.

 

I always wondered why in the movies, people ran away after getting in the first punch...that's a bt like poking a bull in the nose and then hoping that'll scare it off.

[Guest taylorsquare]

I guess when your adrelin kicks in and you have to fight then you can.

I would of been angry at friends who leave you and run.

 

Still lvdkeyes you sorted him out.

 

I was thinking about doing some boxing actually ,im getting bored with the gym and treadmills and stuff.

There is a boxing school near me so may give it a go.

I think its important now to know how to defend yourself .

 

On the matter of homophobic,this is a blog from a cab driver talking about his homophobic passenger.

 

http://www.cablog.com.au

[Gaybutton]

Wow! Bravo Lvdkeyes

I second that. Good for you, lvdkeyes! I'll bet those same 'gentlemen' realized they better think twice before ganging up on someone they think to be vulnerable to bullying.

[mahjongguy]

I lived in BKK for 3 years. My b/f is in his 30's and looks like "maybe he's gay, maybe not". We never received so much as a second glance from anyone. Having spent much of my life in San Francisco, I was already accustomed to this.

 

Then two years ago we moved to Pattaya and in the first week, while doing an afternoon errand on Third Road, we passed a late 40's Brit on the sidewalk. "Fookin' pervert", he says. I was really shocked. For sure this guy spends every evening with 19yo working girls and he's got something to say about my domestic partnership? I've never been in a fight in my life but all I could think of was finding a brick and sending this bog shite back to Manchester in a body bag. Fortunately my b/f, who has plenty of muscle but also a fair amount of common sense, pulled me away down the street.

 

The fact is, living here on a retirement visa means I have to keep my head down and just absorb the occasional offense. Pity. I'd have liked to shown him some Gay Pride in action.

[Guest xiandarkthorne]

I think ignoring people like that usually makes sense. I am not an advocate of sortng out an idiot like that so long as he's happy with simply expressing his stupidity verbally...it's only a matter of time before he insults the wrong person in Thailand and then he'll get a real lesson in community relations, anyway.

 

It's when such people think they can get away with it because they're in a pack that I believe you have to be ready to do something physical to protect yourself. Packs, whether composed of sub-humans or animals, have to be dealt carefully and sensibly - take out the leader if you can and never turn your back on the rest.

[Bob]

Can't really blame you, lvdkeyes, for the way you reacted as I'd have probably done something similar. But, you're probably also lucky that his three friends didn't beat the living hell out of you.

 

Probably not wise to physically confront one Thai let alone one with a few buddies around. It can be downright dangerous and sometimes deadly. But, like I said, sometimes things happen so fast we tend to react without much forethought (just go into automatic mode). I'm personally fine (can take about anything) unless and until somebody touches me or a friend in an unfriendly manner and it is at that point I'm in danger of doing something smart (if it works) or stupid (if I or others get hurt).

 

Thankfully, I've only had one incident ever here in Thailand where I had to stand up and clearly advise a couple of Thais (in the best Clint Eastwood impression I could muster) that they were about to make my day. Thankfully, they quickly sized me up and left the premises (or maybe they just thought I was too ugly to die that day?).

 

A decade or so ago, I was in a bar/restaurant with my bf somewhere in Thailand (it was either Phuket or Pattaya - so long ago I don't remember) and there was a table of fairly drunk falang who were giving us the "stare" and making noises about "fags" or whatever. We quickly left that place as I was certain that big trouble was coming and, while discretion is sometimes the better part of valor, I still would have like to have confronted them (but, given I'm still alive, maybe not....).

[PattayaMale]

I have never had a problem anywhere in Thailand, but several years ago in West Hollywood, CA (very gay city) I did have a problem. 2 "jerks" thought it would be funny to open a car door and hit me with the door as I was passing when I was with my boy friend. They of course then yelled "fags", to which I simply said "big mistake" and kept walking....the the sheriff's station where I reported the incident and gave the car plate number. I knew nothing would really come from the report, but it made me feel a better.

 

A few days latter detectives came to my door and showed me 6 pictures, asking if I could recognize any of the guys as one who "assaulted" me. I picked the guy out and that was that until 2 weeks latter when I received a summons to appear in court. It was more of an office with a judge than a courtroom. When I and my boyfriend went in, the guy that perpetrated the incident was sitting. Apparently, the guy was on parole. At first the guy tried to say that my boyfriend and I were sitting on a wall making out, which we denied. Actually the judge also asked him if he thought this was a reason to assault someone. The guy realized he made a big mistake in saying this even if it were true. So then he started to apologize to us and actually started to cry. (I think he didn't want to go back to prison). The judge then gave the guy a pretty stern lecture and extended his parole by 6 months. When the proceeding were over, the guy walked with us as though we were now his best friends. He continued to apologize all the way out the building where we shook hands and parted.

 

I admit I felt pretty good about the whole thing. For me I thought it came out better than expected.

 

In Thailand though, I feel much happier.

[Guest lvdkeyes]

Great story!

[Guest tdperhs]

Actually, I once had my face kicked in because I would not give a bj to muggers who had absolutely no idea what my sex orientation was. I took a shortcut to my office through a small section of a park one evening in the 1960's. I was carrying a collector's first release edition of a Chaplin film worth about $3000.

 

Suddenly, from behind bushes, two linebackers literally leaped on me. Imagine George and Lenny from "Of Mice and Men" only with about twenty more pounds on George. I was just out of the Air Force and in pretty good shape, but these guys were powerful. I dropped the film case and managed one hit across the bridge of somebody's nose before they started going to work on me. Then my hands were being mostly used as kicking posts protecting my face and ribs alternately.

 

They stopped; and George, who did most of the talking, said, "All we want is your money. Is that worth dying for?" I had been making a delivery to an orphanage. I was wearing grubbies and my valuables had been left at the office nearby. All the money I had on me was one penny. When they discovered that they opened the film case, saw nothing of value to them, and started working on me again. I offered to take them to my office just a couple of hundred yards away, but they weren't that stupid. The office was in a university and there were many armed security guards, all of whom knew me. "We can't get any money out of you," George said, "you gonna suck my dick and he gonna split your ass open with his." Now, the funny thing is, under better circumstances, they could have had the former. They were kind of hot. But nobody was getting the latter. I was ready to die. They tried raping me and kicking me in the crotch. I was dazed and starting to lose consciousness when they stopped for a breather. I started to get up and took a roundhouse kick at my face which knocked me against a tree. I was stunned, but still conscious. I lay absolutely still, eyes closed, and after about a year, probably ten seconds, George said, "Is he dead?" Lenny put his hand on my chest and said, "His heart's beating, but he don't look good." George decided it was time for them to split. After a few seconds, I looked in the direction where I heard them running. I opened my eyes and saw that they had gone about thirty yards. Still pumping adrenalin like a gusher in an oil field, I got up and put on my pants. Lenny looked back and shouted something at George. I picked up the film carton on the run and headed for the road. I looked to my right. George took a couple of steps toward me then decided he couldn't get to me on time. The two thugs turned and continued running away.

 

I made the forty yard dash to the street then to the gas station on the other side. The night attendant pulled me into his kiosk, put himself between me and the door, pulled out a rather long blade pocket knife, then called the police. The last thing I heard was my seventy year old guardian angel's saying, "You gonna be okay, boy. Nobody gonna get you here."

 

When I was conscious again, I found an IV drip in my arm and another needle putting twenty-seven stitches over one eye and sixteen under the other. I was also listening to an intern expressing his amazement that I had not one broken bone and no evidence of a concussion. What I saw in the mirror after a half hour could have been the model for the face of Rocky Balboa at the end of "Rocky."

 

I too have heard of people harassed and beaten for being gay, especially in the 50's when it was fashionable to beat up queers. But only six people knew about me. I had had several high level security clearances before and since that event so I was very good at covering myself. Besides, I never wanted to be a woman, I just want to do one thing they do; and then only sometimes

[Guest lvdkeyes]

When my incident happened I was 23-24 and not long out of tie Air Force, so I was a lot more fit than I am now. It was lucky we had some warning what was about to happen and I could think what to do. I wasn't about to run like a scared rabbit. Incidentally, I never went out with those guys again and moved out shortly afterward. I haven't been in a fight since that time and don't intend to in the future.

[Guest taylorsquare]

PattayaMale,Heres a similar story to yours.

 

Apparently happened 2 weeks in Toronto,Canada.

Young gay guy walking home,car full of hoons alledgelly yell homophobic things then stop and bash him to death.

Christopher Skinner murder.

 

http://toronto.ctv.ca/servlet/an/local/CTVNews/20091020/skinner_murder_091020?hub=Toronto