Your advice for a 'Noob' heading to Thailand.

[EX Navy Dad]

Hello there, I hope I find you well.

It has been delightful to find this forum as I head for my Thailand retirement in mid 2024.

 

My plan is to eventually take the O visa and settle in Songkhla.  I am 65yo man, currently in the UK with my Malay (penang) Hubby/civil partner of 18 years.

 

The MM2H visa is a little out of my reach, altho I understand it is being looked at this year with the possibility of it being turned in to a three tier system.  Gold Platinum Silver.

I wait with baited breath as I would rather settle in Penang, but if that is not possible, it will be an O visa in Thailand for me. 

 

Songkhla so I am closer to the Malay border for Hubby. 

 

Either way, we will be spending time in Thailand and we will be wanting to 'party' in Phucket.  We are not averse to 'entertaining' company.

 

We're not fussed about Pattaya, Hubby wants Phucket as he wishes to visit again for the first time since the horrible events of 2004 when he lost a lot of friends. 

Hubby has also given me a ''pass' to have a night of my choosing, with a couple of twinks.

We would also like to party together with a nice man in our hotel room letting us enjoy ourselves together. 

 

I want nothing outrageous, two twinks, white briefs, poppers, hotel room, masturbate, fondle, masage, cum. 

 

I have spent several days reading through the threads here and I have learned much about what is possible. 

 

Some of the adventures I have read here are truly mind blowing.

 

That said, I would enjoy reading your tips, tricks, advice, and warnings, for a 'gay old dad'  who wants a modest twink party, who hasn't got a clue how things work in Thailand.

 

I am very happy to pay generous fair dues for services rendered but I do have thoughts of waking up and finding my phone gone and my passport missing.

 

Is is safe to sleep overnight with a couple of twinks who I am paying for the night, or am I likely to wake up and find my life is over? 

 

I would like to think I am not a stupid man, 12 years royal navy, 38 years teaching at university..... but we all make school boy mistakes which can cost dearly. .

 

So please, if you have a moment to write a few lines, I would be very happy to read your warnings and advice and ideas for a rewarding stay.

 

I would rather not get ripped off,  I am very happy to recompense a nice lad who will let me have a moment of pleasure.

 

It is very clear there is a huge amount of experience in this forum so please do give me a list of do's and DON'TS

 

Thanks so much. Mike. 

 

 

[macaroni21]

Welcome to the forum. Just so we're clear: you're visiting Phuket soon and you hope to organize a double-twink orgy, right? Although you didn't explicitly say so, are you asking how to go about organizing one? Or have you already figured it out from previous threads?

Your more explicitly stated concern is about safety. Much depends on whether you have a safety box in your apartment or room and whether you have a bed big enough for 3 people. If you don't, you may wish to consider a using cheap room in a separate hotel with multiple beds, and not using your regular room. You need only pay for one night for your party.

[vinapu]

3 hours ago, EX Navy Dad said:

I want nothing outrageous, two twinks, white briefs, poppers, hotel room, masturbate, fondle, masage, cum. 

......

I am very happy to pay generous fair dues for services rendered but I do have thoughts of waking up and finding my phone gone and my passport missing.

Is is safe to sleep overnight with a couple of twinks who I am paying for the night, or am I likely to wake up and find my life is over? 

I would rather not get ripped off,  I am very happy to recompense a nice lad who will let me have a moment of pleasure.

 

sleep well, Thailand is  a country where crime exists but it should be least of your concerns.

Make sure your overnight  companion is sourced from some established place like bar or massage, not from street. I'd not invite guy from apps for sleepover too unless you tested him before for short time  and got some feeling of what person he is.  Worst rip off you may have is when at 3 am he announces that he parked his motorbike in wrong spot and must to move it or his roommate forgot a key and he needs to go.

If you plan to bring more than one boy at once, pick up one , explain him what you want to do and let him to select other companion(s) , subject to your approval. You don't want to dump other guy your first  chosen one may not be comfortable with. He may suggest somebody from his place or quite opposite , from place as far as possible from there.

You can lock your passport and phone in safety deposit box but I never locked phone nor tablet and nothing was missing .

 

[macaroni21]

Does @vinapu not have a wallet to lock away?

[vinapu]

3 minutes ago, macaroni21 said:

Does @vinapu not have a wallet to lock away?

crude attempt of making fun of me , right ? 

But answer is NO because  I don't use a wallet.  When boy comes , whatever is in my pockets stays there, whatever is locked , stays locked. I find awkward using  opening or closing safety box in boy's presence and try to be prepared not to.

[fedssocr]

The best advice I see from well-informed people is to take your time when it comes to choosing a place to retire. Spend a few months first before you make a permanent decision on where to live. Do you speak Thai? Will you be planning to learn? I think it's easier to get by with English only in the more tourist-oriented places like Bangkok, Pattaya or Phuket. Songkhla might be a little more challenging.

[thaiophilus]

12 hours ago, fedssocr said:

 Songkhla might be a little more challenging.

... putting it very mildly, and not just because of the language. Are you sure you can handle the potential boredom of small-town life?

Also, the land route from Songkhla to Padang Besar takes you into "FCDO advises against all but essential travel" territory. To satisfy the need  for regular visits to Malaysia, you might be better off living in Bangkok and flying to KL or Penang. (it might even be quicker!)

 

[omega]

I too am questioning the wisdom of Songkhla. My understanding is that the border region with Malaysia is somewhat unsafe, with unrest and violence very much a possibility. Though my understanding isn't at all complete on that, so perhaps you're more aware of the situation and are happier with it.

As for your planned party with the twinks... If your worried about being ripped off, you should follow the advice given about using a second hotel room for your little party. Take enough cash for their tips, and leave everything else in your main room.

 

 

[spoon]

Songkhla is the state where hatyai city is located. There is a direct train from padang besar border to hatyai. Hatyai is a popular tourist destination for most malaysians. And if his hubby stays in penang, id say its much easier to meet from hatyai than bangkok and much cheaper too. Direct flight between bangkok and penang is scarce and expensive, and the alternative with a stop at KL will certainly not be quicker. I know someone who lives in penang and travel to hatyai almost once a month. 

If u have to choose a place in southern thailand to stay, hatyai, songkhla makes sense. 

[forrestreid]

 I wonder how familiar with Songkhla people commentating are. I once met a guy on Dongtan beach  who was retired there – I remember he said that although it was sometimes a bit quiet, it was also a pretty town on the beach, and far enough north to be away from the terrorism problems. According to Wikitravel, it is a bustling university town about 30 minutes by bus from Hat Yai.

But I agree that being wanting to visit Malaysia frequently does not necessarily mean that one needs to be close to the border, depending on where in Malaysia the boyfriend  wants to visit. If he wants to visit Alor Setar, that is about 3 hours from Songkhla, but if he wants to visit Kuala Lumpur, you are talking about a ten hour bus journey

Compared to this, the 1 hour 30 minute flight from Phuket to KL may be handier (although admittedly more expensive).

[EX Navy Dad]

I am grateful for the comments thus far, I will try to quote comment on your comments in the coming days.   

[EX Navy Dad]

21 hours ago, macaroni21 said:

Welcome to the forum.  

Thank You. 

 

21 hours ago, macaroni21 said:

you're visiting Phuket soon and you hope to organize a double-twink orgy, right? Although you didn't explicitly say so, are you asking how to go about organizing one?

Yes I am, not so much an orgy, just a nice evening with a couple of twinks who will allow me to cum while I enjoy watching them in privacy.

Where is the best place to select such participants.... It would seem 'apps' are not the best way, which is good to know. 

 

21 hours ago, vinapu said:

Make sure your overnight  companion is sourced from some established place like bar or massage, not from street. I'd not invite guy from apps for sleepover too unless you tested him before for short time  and got some feeling of what person he is.  Worst rip off you may have is when at 3 am he announces that he parked his motorbike in wrong spot and must to move it or his roommate forgot a key and he needs to go.

If you plan to bring more than one boy at once, pick up one , explain him what you want to do and let him to select other companion(s) , subject to your approval. You don't want to dump other guy your first  chosen one may not be comfortable with. He may suggest somebody from his place or quite opposite , from place as far as possible from there.

You can lock your passport and phone in safety deposit box but I never locked phone nor tablet and nothing was missing .

 

Makes a lot of sense, Thank You. 

 

17 hours ago, fedssocr said:

The best advice I see from well-informed people is to take your time when it comes to choosing a place to retire. Spend a few months first before you make a permanent decision on where to live. Do you speak Thai? Will you be planning to learn? I think it's easier to get by with English only in the more tourist-oriented places like Bangkok, Pattaya or Phuket. Songkhla might be a little more challenging.

 

I don't speak a word of Thai but hubby is fluent and we have a very large extended family from Penang all the way to Hat Yai to help us along the way. 

4 hours ago, thaiophilus said:

Are you sure you can handle the potential boredom of small-town life?

Also, the land route from Songkhla to Padang Besar takes you into "FCDO advises against all but essential travel" territory. To satisfy the need  for regular visits to Malaysia, you might be better off living in Bangkok and flying to KL or Penang. (it might even be quicker!)

 

Small town life is exactly what we want when we are not going away for a weekend party

We will be travelling with extended family when doing any travel between Hay Yai/Songkhla so I am not too worried

 

4 hours ago, omega said:

you should follow the advice given about using a second hotel room for your little party. Take enough cash for their tips, and leave everything else in your main room.

 

 

This is a bit of genius advice, thanks. 

[ChristianPFC]

In my vast experience, hundreds of boys to my room, dozens over spontaneous overnights, even with street trade, there is nothing to worry about (neither safety nor theft). Out of that large number, I had a few cases of petty theft. Keep only as much money as you are going to spend on you, and lock the rest and your passport in safe and you should be fine.

As for finding two twinks to stay with you and your partner over night, I would go to one of the few (at least before my last visit 2019) gay bars and massages in Phuket and ask them. Or find one online and ask him if he can bring a friend.

[llz]

There are (were ?) some gay places in Hat Yai too, i don’t know if they survived the pandemy though

[ChristianPFC]

Indeed, Hat Yai has or had a gay scene, here report from my last visit 2017:

https://christianpfc.blogspot.com/2017/09/gay-places-in-hat-yai-sep-2017.html

[vinapu]

16 hours ago, ChristianPFC said:

Indeed, Hat Yai has or had a gay scene, here report from my last visit 2017:

 

that's while ago, to put things in perspective , that year soi Twilight was still in full swing, Hero and Babylon were crowns of gay entertainment, Good Boys were gracing Sunee Plaza  and Madrid Tavern was  still in Patpong 1

[10tazione]

2 hours ago, vinapu said:

that's while ago, to put things in perspective , that year soi Twilight was still in full swing, Hero and Babylon were crowns of gay entertainment, Good Boys were gracing Sunee Plaza  and Madrid Tavern was  still in Patpong 1

There is a gay massage place in Hat Yai with recent posts on twitter with ID  "@gclubspa"