Your life as a senior gay man

[kokopelli 2]

9 hours ago, Olddaddy said:

For those of you over 60 as a gay man how is your lifestyle now?

Obviously your life goals change as you get older over 75 etc when your lifespan becomes around 5-7 years left ?

Can't answer your question as I died last year when I reached 82, at least according to your estimate above.

[Olddaddy]

41 minutes ago, kokopelli 2 said:

Can't answer your question as I died last year when I reached 82, at least according to your estimate above.

most people in statistics die between 78 & 82 

Sorry but I'd rather be a realist ,

I guess those ages will raise as the next generation become healthier and they find better treatment to medical conditions,

 

[Olddaddy]

33 minutes ago, floridarob said:

I was told a long time ago from an older guy....the regrets you will have at the end of your life will be the things you didn't do, not the things you did. Rings very true to this day.

To get something of a visual, how much time you have left:

https://www.businessinsider.com/infographic-of-your-life-in-weeks-2015-2?r=MX&IR=T

Or if you plan to live to be 90:
https://www.bryanbraun.com/your-life/weeks.html

How very true 🤣

Never thought of it that way 

[Guest]

4 hours ago, Olddaddy said:

I guess those ages will raise as the next generation become healthier and they find better treatment to medical conditions,

In the US, life expectancy dropped for the second year in a row. Obviously, this is due to Covid.  However, other wealthy/developed countries did not have the same outcome.  It was a combination of an extremely poor government response and many who refused to follow the little guidance that was offered.

From the New York Times one week ago;

In 2021, the average American could expect to live until the age of 76, federal health researchers reported on Wednesday. The figure represents a loss of almost three years since 2019, when Americans could expect to live, on average, nearly 79 years.

U.S. Life Expectancy Falls Again in ‘Historic’ Setback
https://www.nytimes.com/2022/08/31/health/life-expectancy-covid-pandemic.html?smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare

 

[Gaybutton]

32 minutes ago, wtfool said:

my first ever post on here, don't be too hard on me, just being honest, I know gay guys like me who think this way are looked down on for not having the balls to come out, I am what I am and quite frankly I don't have the balls and my life has been much poorer for it.

Maybe it's time to stop worrying about what others may think - unless you want your life to continue being unhappy.  If it were me and I came out to my friends, but they refuse to understand, then I'd say they were never real friends in the first place.  If that happens, why not just drop them and move on to the life you really want.

That's what I did and I've never regretted it.  Some understood and we remain friends to this day.  Others, to hell with them.  I would do it again without hesitation.  I hope you'll do the same. 

[scott456]

I get blow jobs in the public, never worried about what others think.

[CurtisD]

52 minutes ago, wtfool said:

I am what I am and quite frankly I don't have the balls and my life has been much poorer for it.

Similar case to @floridarob , when I was in my teens an elderly and very glamorous friend of my parents told me that the only regrets in life are the things you didn't do.

She appeared to have it all, still stylish approaching 80, in demand at social events, wealth. She had never married because the man she loved had not been good enough for her in her family's eyes and unable to marry the man she wanted without being cut off from the family money, she devoted her life to being an ornament on the social circuit. As she approached 80 it was a decision she very much regretted. 

Her advice to me was very clear: you have one shot at life, live it for who you are and want to be, don't live it to conform to the expectations of others.  

Buying a condo in Pattaya suggests to me that you have attempted to start a new life.

Why not make a second attempt?

Buy a condo somewhere else, away from you new 'hetro friends', and start over with a plan, a clearer vision and determination of who you want to be, who you want your friends to be and what you want to experience in the next phase of your life. 

[tassojunior]

Reminds me of how I felt last week when the US gov't suddenly announced our life expectancy had dropped by several years the past year. To under what I currently am !

Then I remembered life expectancy goes by your current age. But it was a hell of a headline to see with morning coffee, ie: that the jar of  marmalade in front of you has a longer expiration date than you do.  

[fedssocr]

1 hour ago, wtfool said:

I am 57, finished with work and have almost £1million in savings, also have nice condo in Pattaya, been married and had ok sex life but always had strong gay side and never did anything until late 40's, still haven't done much, embarassed about being gay, made english speaking friends all very hetro? and my life is as much a lie as it's always been, I think young slim Thai guys 19/20+ look very beautiful and very sexy, way more attractive/sexy than women, at 57 I am a very lonely and unhappy guy, can't have the sex I probably would like as too worried about what my new "friends" would think of me and even in Thailand back to hiding in the closet, sure still better than UK and can have nice sexy massage in shop now and again but because of my "brain" I am wasting my life and the years I have left, I know this but find the change needed not possible, too worried about what other people think or say, if i was seen with a 22 year old female stunner I wouldn't give a fook and guys look at me with admiration, if seen with a 22 year old beautiful slim thai guy and I am a dirty creep in their eyes, I will go to my grave with an unfulfilled life full of missed opportunities to have made it better.

my first ever post on here, don't be too hard on me, just being honest, I know gay guys like me who think this way are looked down on for not having the balls to come out, I am what I am and quite frankly I don't have the balls and my life has been much poorer for it.

for now I am in the UK but will be back for long winter in Thailand

I think the vast majority of people don't think about you at all. That is to say if you're out with some cute Thai boy most of the people you encounter won't care because they have their own lives to worry about. Maybe some will give you the side eye, but you'll never see them again so who cares what they think? I don't say it to criticize but you might want to consider therapy to help you get over all of these internalized issues. It couldn't hurt and quite likely would help you a great deal. You may also have undiagnosed depression or other mental health issues that can be treated either with medication or other therapy.

[kokopelli 2]

14 hours ago, Olddaddy said:

Usually I don't drink ,but having dinner with a friend last night he gave me sweet white wine 🍷🥂, and I loved the sweet white  wine ,drank a few glasses and U slept the best I ever had ,just woke up actually and I'm afresh ready to hit the gym !!

I won't drink again though for awhile even though they say red wine is good for health ?

Any wine drinkers here ? 

I love good wine as do many of my friends, but not sweet wines!

[Guest guest_BenG1000]

That's $12 plonk .. Lolly water

[PeterRS]

1 hour ago, kokopelli 2 said:

I love good wine as do many of my friends, but not sweet wines!

I also love many wines, red, white and rose and would find life more difficult if I could not have some nice wine regularly from time to time. Unlike @kokopelli 2, though, I love a really good sweet wine at the end of a meal. Although I get to drink it only rarely, a glass or two (they're small for sweet wines) of Chateau d'Yquem is a small miracle. The rich taste of so many honeyed tropical and other fruits in one's mouth and an aftertaste with roasted nuts that lasts at least five minutes. One of life's glories!  

[a-447]

You need to forget those hetero "friends" and find a bunch of gay friends with whom you will share a lot in common.

[Boy69]

I don't understand what is the problem if visiting alone in Thailand you can cruise the gay bars and the apps fuck whoever you wants and  nobody care if you are straight or gay and no one will know what you did or didn't do at Thailand. 

[floridarob]

2 hours ago, PeterRS said:

The rich taste of so many honeyed tropical and other fruits in one's mouth and an aftertaste with roasted nuts that lasts at least five minutes. One of life's glories!  

You still talking about wine, or did it drift into sexual territory......😳

1 hour ago, wtfool said:

I don't care in Thailand about being seen by strangers with a cute sexy young guy, I do care about being seen by straight guys who I've gotten friendly with seeing me.

it's 2022...most hetero guys don't care, might have other gay friends. I have lot's of straight friends that know I'm gay, as long as you don't go into detail about sex, they're generally cool with everything. And if they aren't....they weren't really your friends.

1 hour ago, a-447 said:

You need to forget those hetero "friends" and find a bunch of gay friends with whom you will share a lot in common.

Gays can be more judgmental than straights....not to mention catty and dramatic, lol 

[Olddaddy]

6 hours ago, BenG1000 said:

That's $12 plonk .. Lolly water

$22 actually 😊,but I find the cheaper wines particularly red ones nice n sweet .🍾

What sweet red wines do you recommend to have with meat dishes ? I don't like bitter or sour 🍷

[Olddaddy]

3 hours ago, floridarob said:

rich taste of so many honeyed tropical and other fruits in one's mouth and an aftertaste with roasted nuts that lasts at least five minutes. One of life's glories!  

The way you describe those nuts 🤣 

[maump]

11 hours ago, wtfool said:

I am 57,

 guys like me who think this way are looked down on for not having the balls to come out, I am what I am and quite frankly I don't have the balls and my life has been much poorer for it.

for now I am in the UK but will be back for long winter in Thailand

When you come to thailand in winter.  hook up with some of the more social guys on the board.  Make some new friends!  there are plenty of guys here that enjoy good sex with young smooth thai men.

there used to be gay dinner social club in Pattaya that met to eat (at a german retaurant) then wander down the soi to sunnee and hit Eros (?) to fondle dancers then moved on to.....  It was fun and an eye opener for me to enjoy such things with some other like minded men.

Or maybe a lady boy for your straight men "friends" to admire you?  🤣

[maump]

On 9/7/2022 at 5:02 PM, Olddaddy said:

For those of you over 60 as a gay man how is your lifestyle now?  Are you living life to the fullest ,travel,sex etc    But the question is ,are you wasting your next years left ?

But I'm not one now  to waste time working continually for money my goal this year starting from October 1st to December 31  is to suck as many cocks , and be fucked .

I plan to grow old disgracefully wbu ?

This topic greatly interests me. WBU?  My goal is to grow old disgracefully as well.  I want to fuck and/or be fucked by as many men as I can find and buy.  And perhaps in that journey find one (or two) that I might trust to “care” for me when I become infirm (although I would most like to die suddenly in the middle of an orgasm).  When I can’t do it anymore, I can still watch.

My dilemma is how and where to do this. 

I have been to Thailand, loved it, want to go again (but hate the flights).  Did 35 days in Medellin/Bogota Colombia this spring and was utterly disgraceful.  Want to check out Laos, Cambodia, Thailand, Myanmar, Brazil and the Philippines.  Looking for a second home…..

I still have a husband; he has no interest in men or travel.  I’m recently retired, banging around in the house.  He unhappy when I’m here and unhappy when I go.

My plan was to move to my condo in FLA, sell the house in PA, and we explore the world.  Easy to close the door in the condo and go.  Now he does not want to move to FLA.

SO, I go on vacations on my own as “I’m not going to sit here and wait to die.”  I even went back to work oversea for a year to get out of the house (2020 UAE – covid holiday).

My countdown clock is not good.  I had 7 bypasses at 47 and 5 more stents at 48.  I’m already beating the life expectance odds for patients like me. (Doctor says I’m doing good!)  But who knows when the ticker will stop.  Go to the gym 5 days a week, walk or treadmill an hour most days, and weights during the week.  The dick does not work nearly as good as before… too much porn and meds.  So learning to enjoy bottoming too.

I don’t want to be in PA for the winter.  So southeast Asia is on the flight plan.  My goal is December thru April.  So that means flying in and out of Thailand to beat the visa issues.  Like to experience Songkran… although I read most of you locals hate it.  Maybe hit Colombia again on the way back home.

Hoping there is some board members who might want to meet and exchange notes over beer or coke in Jomtien.

Is anyone using the facebook groups to find men?  there are many gay men dating groups with some rent boys... and other looking for partners or sugar daddys...

[Gaybutton]

14 hours ago, scott456 said:

I get blow jobs in the public, never worried about what others think.

Do you sell tickets?

[vinapu]

20 hours ago, kokopelli 2 said:

 as I died last year when I reached 82, at least according to your estimate above.

and how do you like there ?

[vinapu]

15 hours ago, wtfool said:

I am 57, finished with work and have almost £1million in savings........I will go to my grave with an unfulfilled life full of missed opportunities to have made it better.

 

really ?

money is not everything but obviously you did not waste your life, look at full half of glass

[Shonen]

I lost most of my hair in my twenties, but have it all back now with the miracle of a tattoo. I should have done it much earlier.

i retired at 57, could have been 55. However I was able to sort of manipulate my job so my pension is about the same as my salary during my working years. I will say I’m more lonely since I’m retired and don’t have the interaction with my coworkers.

I will never do any work now, as time is the most valuable commodity. I certainly don’t want to be the richest guy in the cemetery.

[vinapu]

30 minutes ago, Shonen said:

 I certainly don’t want to be the richest guy in the cemetery.

right, Musk and Gates will beat you anyways so why bother ?

[scott456]

38 minutes ago, vinapu said:

right, Musk and Gates will beat you anyways so why bother ?

I am sure they are actively looking for ways to prolong their lives.