Members Europeanman Posted December 30, 2019 Members Posted December 30, 2019 I understand this is a sensitive subject. So I get straight to the point: Do you hire escorts who are desperate for money? If you do, does it bother you? Quote
Members RockHardNYC Posted December 30, 2019 Members Posted December 30, 2019 (edited) "Desperate for money" is a click-bate term. There are so many levels and layers to its meaning, it's insulting to attempt a worthwhile discussion from a black and white perspective. If we're talking addiction, then I'll pass on any negotiation. If you've fallen on hard times and sincerely need help, and I'm familiar with your heart and soul, I'm all ears. Does it bother me to help someone in need? Does it bother me to give someone a job, an opportunity to make money? Absolutely not. If no one is forcing you to sell sex, then consenting adults should be free to transact. IMO, selling sex is no different than selling many other services. I can't wait for the day when it becomes legal. American conservatism is for people riddled with fear. Edited December 30, 2019 by RockHardNYC AdamSmith 1 Quote
Members Latbear4blk Posted December 30, 2019 Members Posted December 30, 2019 6 hours ago, Europeanman said: I understand this is a sensitive subject. So I get straight to the point: Do you hire escorts who are desperate for money? If you do, does it bother you? If during the discussion of the contract I detect any signs of "desperation", I move on. Quote
Members Europeanman Posted December 30, 2019 Author Members Posted December 30, 2019 (edited) 54 minutes ago, RockHardNYC said: If no one is forcing you to sell sex, then consenting adults should be free to transact. IMO, selling sex is no different than selling many other services. And what if he has no other options. If there is absolutely no other work. If fucking you is the only way to buy food to eat, or pay for a room to sleep? Edited December 30, 2019 by Europeanman Quote
Members Europeanman Posted December 30, 2019 Author Members Posted December 30, 2019 29 minutes ago, Latbear4blk said: If during the discussion of the contract I detect any signs of "desperation", I move on. I take contract work too seriously to use it here Joking aside, I entirely agree. Maybe give him some money and move on. Quote
Members msclelovr Posted December 30, 2019 Members Posted December 30, 2019 Desperation is an unattractive quality in any playmate, whether a free date or a working guy. That said, if there’s a personal connection when we talk and it seems as if there’s chemistry between us, I’d proceed. It’s impossible to know why someone might be “desperate for money”as @Europeanman observed. The need for money may range from an ordinary guy wanting to pay an unexpected bill, to a guy needing to pay his mortgage or his monthly rent or a guy needing cash for his socializing with friends, right upto guys needing money for food or a quick fix. I steer clear of addicts but I’ve played with guys who needed help to pay their mortgage and guys who earned money to spend later in the clubs. Buddy2 1 Quote
Members RockHardNYC Posted December 30, 2019 Members Posted December 30, 2019 2 hours ago, Europeanman said: And what if he has no other options. By whose determination? I could be wrong, but I imagine any male capable of escorting is capable of doing other work. If he doesn't want to escort, if he does not enjoy escorting, then it's up to him to move forward towards changing his job description. It's not up to me to make that decision for him or punish him because he is not loving the work. The vast majority of workers in our society dislike, even hate, their jobs. Why should escorting be any different? Does every overworked, underpaid nurse enjoy wiping a sick patient's ass? There's a Latino maintenance man in my building who is miserable. He hates his job even though he's fairly good at it, but he needs the union benefits for his baby momma. I prefer to ask him to do certain things in the house because he's handsome and has a gorgeous smile. I enjoy his personality. Do I tip him for everything he does for me? Absolutely. Are my tips more generous than others? Probably. Why am I generous? I know he hates his job and money can motivate people to do things they don't enjoy. Money makes the bad things in life a little more tolerable. AdamSmith 1 Quote
caeron Posted December 30, 2019 Posted December 30, 2019 I retired early from a job I didn't like that paid very well. As Rockhard says, a lot of people do shit for money that they don't enjoy. The idea that somehow fucking people for money is inherently worse than all the other whoring we all do for money is stupid. nycman 1 Quote
Members RockHardNYC Posted December 30, 2019 Members Posted December 30, 2019 19 minutes ago, caeron said: The idea that somehow fucking people for money is inherently worse than all the other whoring we all do for money is stupid. Amen. The last time I visited a great HE massage therapist, who clearly was enjoying the work (and my cock), I said to him, "What a great job you have. You get to work from a comfy home. You get to be your own boss and work the hours you select. You get to pick your own table, sheets, towels, lotions, and music. You get to pick and choose the customers you prefer (he asked for a photo). You get to work naked on other naked men. You get to choose which guys you desire for extended play. I can't think of a job that is more fun than yours." His response? "I can't think of one either." And he said it with a big smile before going down on my engorged cock. numerito and AdamSmith 1 1 Quote
AdamSmith Posted December 31, 2019 Posted December 31, 2019 12 hours ago, RockHardNYC said: Amen. The last time I visited a great HE massage therapist, who clearly was enjoying the work (and my cock), I said to him, "What a great job you have. You get to work from a comfy home. You get to be your own boss and work the hours you select. You get to pick your own table, sheets, towels, lotions, and music. You get to pick and choose the customers you prefer (he asked for a photo). You get to work naked on other naked men. You get to choose which guys you desire for extended play. I can't think of a job that is more fun than yours." His response? "I can't think of one either." And he said it with a big smile before going down on my engorged cock. If you like what you do, for whom it you do,it, because it has inherently impeachable value to him/her too, then you have found the spot. Quote
Members Europeanman Posted December 31, 2019 Author Members Posted December 31, 2019 This is not about using escorts/masseurs/companions in Europe or US. I started this thread thinking of people going to places like South America or SE Asia to hire desperate boys who have very few alternatives to make a living and are selling themselves to survive. It does not feel right, it would be on my conscious, I never do it. Incidentally, I am going for a few days to Thailand with a nice Russian companion. He "needs" money to support his lavish lifestyle. That is fine with me, but I will never use one of the local boys. This is what I was thinking when I started the topic. Quote
Members msclelovr Posted December 31, 2019 Members Posted December 31, 2019 (edited) That you were thinking of desperate guys in poor, Third World countries puts a completely different complexion on this @Europeanman I wouldn’t want to hire or exploit some desperate guy. When I travel in poor countries, I do tip lavishly for normal services in hotels, restaurants etc. In the past, I have been approached by some nice, handsome guys in such countries; if we hit it off, I take them to dinner before we do anything else, and I make sure to look after them well. Edited December 31, 2019 by msclelovr Europeanman and AdamSmith 1 1 Quote
Members Buddy2 Posted December 31, 2019 Members Posted December 31, 2019 I don't agree that most people hate their jobs. Europeanman 1 Quote
TotallyOz Posted December 31, 2019 Posted December 31, 2019 5 hours ago, Europeanman said: This is not about using escorts/masseurs/companions in Europe or US. I started this thread thinking of people going to places like South America or SE Asia to hire desperate boys who have very few alternatives to make a living and are selling themselves to survive. It does not feel right, it would be on my conscious, I never do it. Incidentally, I am going for a few days to Thailand with a nice Russian companion. He "needs" money to support his lavish lifestyle. That is fine with me, but I will never use one of the local boys. This is what I was thinking when I started the topic. Wait a minute. I lived in NYC and know hundreds of escorts. They did it because they were desperate. They were actors, dancers, students, etc. and they wanted a job that was less hours for big money. That was desperate for them. Many said they would have to work 80 hours a week in a regular job to come close to working a few hours as an escort and it was worth it for them. Asia: Well, guess what? Same fucking thing. People always have options and many want the big draw that escorting brings to them. I don't know of any guys that I have met who could not do something else but while they are able, they choose to work for money with sex. Last week, I saw an ex who lived with me many many years ago and was an escort. He still is. But, now he sees women. He said the older he got, the more women wanted to hire him and he went with them now. But, was happy to go with either. I asked how long he would do this (he is in his 30's) and he said until he can't get work any more. paulsf, nycman, msclelovr and 1 other 4 Quote
Members Europeanman Posted December 31, 2019 Author Members Posted December 31, 2019 1 hour ago, TotallyOz said: Wait a minute. I lived in NYC and know hundreds of escorts. They did it because they were desperate. They were actors, dancers, students, etc. and they wanted a job that was less hours for big money. That was desperate for them. Many said they would have to work 80 hours a week in a regular job to come close to working a few hours as an escort and it was worth it for them. This is not the desperation I refer to. I think I explained myself in previous posts. Quote
Members RockHardNYC Posted December 31, 2019 Members Posted December 31, 2019 7 hours ago, Europeanman said: I started this thread thinking of people going to places like South America or SE Asia to hire desperate boys It's not something I've ever done or plan to do. I have no interest in hiring "boys." Furthermore, you failed to be this clear in your OP, which explains the comments you've been receiving. Buddy2 1 Quote
Members RockHardNYC Posted December 31, 2019 Members Posted December 31, 2019 4 hours ago, Buddy2 said: I don't agree that most people hate their jobs. 85% of People Hate Their Jobs, Gallup Poll Says There's certainly no need to take my word for it. A simple Google search reveals endless data. Quote
Members RA1 Posted December 31, 2019 Members Posted December 31, 2019 33 minutes ago, RockHardNYC said: 85% of People Hate Their Jobs, Gallup Poll Says But 100% of people like money. Best regards, RA1 Quote
Members RockHardNYC Posted December 31, 2019 Members Posted December 31, 2019 1 hour ago, RA1 said: 100% of people like money Workers do like getting paid for their work. Money helps pay the bills and stay current with cell phones. It's also a known fact that many workers take pride in being productive, whether they like their job or not. This aspect of human nature is something a corporation enjoys taking advantage of. Some people are born with an entrepreneurial spirit, but too few accept the calling, relying instead on something they perceive as a safer bet. AdamSmith 1 Quote
Members RA1 Posted December 31, 2019 Members Posted December 31, 2019 59 minutes ago, RockHardNYC said: Workers do like getting paid for their work. Money helps pay the bills and stay current with cell phones. It's also a known fact that many workers take pride in being productive, whether they like their job or not. This aspect of human nature is something a corporation enjoys taking advantage of. Some people are born with an entrepreneurial spirit, but too few accept the calling, relying instead on something they perceive as a safer bet. I have been lucky. I have never worked a day in my life because I loved what I was doing. Sure there were days when things did not go well but there was always tomorrow if not yesterday to cheer me up. Best regards, RA1 AdamSmith 1 Quote
caeron Posted December 31, 2019 Posted December 31, 2019 11 hours ago, Europeanman said: This is not about using escorts/masseurs/companions in Europe or US. I started this thread thinking of people going to places like South America or SE Asia to hire desperate boys who have very few alternatives to make a living and are selling themselves to survive. It does not feel right, it would be on my conscious, I never do it. Incidentally, I am going for a few days to Thailand with a nice Russian companion. He "needs" money to support his lavish lifestyle. That is fine with me, but I will never use one of the local boys. This is what I was thinking when I started the topic. So instead you don't help them and they remain desperate. You only hire guys who don't actually need the money except to support a 'lavish lifestyle'. That makes sense to you? Ok, then. It sounds to me like you just don't like being around poor people because it makes you feel guilty about your wealth, so you avoid them. That isn't about not taking advantage of them. It's about you trying to shelter yourself from their reality. It also sounds like you've got hangups about sex and imagine fucking for money is more degrading somehow than digging ditches or the like. I know which of these two things I'd rather do and it isn't digging ditches. Your life, your choices, but unless you're just giving these guys money for nothing, I can't see how NOT patronizing them helps them in any way whatsoever. paulsf and AdamSmith 2 Quote
Popular Post TotallyOz Posted January 1, 2020 Popular Post Posted January 1, 2020 14 hours ago, Europeanman said: This is not the desperation I refer to. I think I explained myself in previous posts. I think you said selling themselves to survive. Well, I don't know of one guy in Bangkok who could not go back to their village and survive working on the family farm or in a local store, or whatever. They choose this as the pay is better and it gives them better opportunities. I'd love to know your definition of survival. Because, I think mine might be different but mine is only based on the few thousand guys I have known over the years. paulsf, KYTOP, nycman and 2 others 1 2 2 Quote
Members Europeanman Posted January 1, 2020 Author Members Posted January 1, 2020 11 hours ago, caeron said: you just don't like being around poor people because it makes you feel guilty about your wealth, so you avoid them. Correct I don't like being around poor people because they are rarely fun, they have too many problems and it shows. A very good friend of mine has an expression: "ugly as poor" . Quote
Members Europeanman Posted January 1, 2020 Author Members Posted January 1, 2020 33 minutes ago, TotallyOz said: I think you said selling themselves to survive. Well, I don't know of one guy in Bangkok who could not go back to their village and survive working on the family farm or in a local store, or whatever. They choose this as the pay is better and it gives them better opportunities. I'd love to know your definition of survival. Because, I think mine might be different but mine is only based on the few thousand guys I have known over the years. I think we are doing circles here. So I am off to Asia for a few days of sunshine and relaxation. My posh Russian companion is the perfect accessory for the pool. He will probably use the money to buy one more Cartier which is fine with me. My best wishes to all for an extraordinary year! Quote
TotallyOz Posted January 1, 2020 Posted January 1, 2020 36 minutes ago, Europeanman said: I think we are doing circles here. So I am off to Asia for a few days of sunshine and relaxation. My posh Russian companion is the perfect accessory for the pool. He will probably use the money to buy one more Cartier which is fine with me. My best wishes to all for an extraordinary year! If a Cartier is what it takes for him to survive, I guess we all have different needs. LOL Best wishes to you as well. Enjoy your posh Russian Companion. Quote