numazu Posted August 5, 2019 Posted August 5, 2019 2 hours ago, Tartegogo said: Without that rule, this place is toxic, which is why I am only here when I really need to. Amen to this. I’m the same way. Tartegogo, kennywantsit, Kevie770 and 1 other 4 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 51 minutes ago, SolaceSoul said: As loquacious as your comment may be, to be very clear, the OP also stated succinctly and clearly in his original comment: “I had safe sex with many boys on a two day trip i recently made to Colombia”. This wasn’t about the colloquial use of the term “had”, but the literal meaning of “sex with boys”. It’s hard to defend that from an overzealous investigator / prosecutor post-script. “But every other reader knew what I meant!” is not a very good defense. Clearer language is much more preferable. Agree. That is why I specifically referred to the topic label on its own, to ilustrate the sometimes ridiculousness of attempts at plausible deniability. The advanced-level intellectual arguments are compelling and valiant, but not hitting the mark as they should. Tossing in a few qualitatively different narratives is not meant to detract simply because they may compete for attention spans and the tasks of knitting together various ideas. The court of public opinion is one of the main legislative drivers. It is much more likely to conflate "boytoy" with "child" in the male-sex-with-male context because gay sex is conflated with paedophilia. We can thank NAMBLA for reinforcing that construct. "Callgirl", for example in contrast, is likely to evoke images of Klute or Stormy Daniels over those of Iris in Taxi Driver or the gender equivalent of the typical "twink" many homosexual men go gaga over because secondary sex characteristics other than fully developmetally dropped gonads are anathema according to the arousal templates of some (not all). Public opinion and values will influence "cherrypicking" exploration beneath the tip of the iceberg of any heading. SolaceSoul 1 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 Here's a weird word observation. "Loquacious" has a variety of both neutral and pejorative meanings. Its anyonym ... reticent, reserved or uncommunicative, etc ... also holds a range of neutral and derogatory meanings. Thus, being one and not the other, either way, places the labelled in a paradoxical bind of being cast in a negative light. SS, you may be even more deviously and intelligently manipulative, for innocent shits and giggles of course, than I have given you credit for. LOL. AdamSmith and SolaceSoul 2 Quote
Members tassojunior Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 St8 men talk about fucking "girls" without underage assumed. Boys/Girls is just commonly used (maybe wrongly) in talk about sex on both sides. Only with gays is there often connection with pedophilia. Quote
Members SolaceSoul Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 12 minutes ago, tassojunior said: St8 men talk about fucking "girls" without underage assumed. Boys/Girls is just commonly used (maybe wrongly) in talk about sex on both sides. Only with gays is there often connection with pedophilia. Again, you’re arguing about a world as it “should be”. I believe that @Riobard and I are, using separate arguments, discussing a world not as it “should” be, but as it is In a perfect world, 10- to 12-year-old black boys in America *shouldn’t* be arrested for throwing a ball too hard in a dodgeball game, or shot dead by police within 1.2 seconds for playing with Nerf guns in a public park. But here we are. Riobard 1 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 15 hours ago, AdamSmith said: Your careful thoughtfulness about these issues and their numerous contexts are very valuable in having an informed think about these certainly alarming developments in the body politic. But I don’t understand how under-age vs of-age, and trafficked vs voluntary, are ‘arbitrary’ binary gradients. I do agree that political, and voter, sentiment are today going crazy, dangerously so, over these things. Note that i wrote "variables or arbitrary binaries on a gradient". Meaning that some of the relevant constructs are 2-side categorical and yet there may be a continuum of meaning for some variables. For example, a high-end callgirl's ad broker and an inbound port storage container broker might be clumped together. A binary such as indictment vs summary prosecution may also be applied to a 2-plus continuum. BTW, I do believe there is currently low consensus on gender as a binary. Please try not to get too caught up in the nomenclature. Arbitrary is relevant because there is lacking complete and consistently accepted reason behind certain aspects of the law, in tandem with the peremptory application of authority that is driven by public opinion with inadequate capacity to interpret the available body of related research, and in many cases it is a challenge to define a constant of specified value. Get all that, Rob? AdamSmith 1 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 34 minutes ago, SolaceSoul said: Again, you’re arguing about a world as it “should be”. I believe that @Riobard and I are, using separate arguments, discussing a world not as it “should” be, but as it is In a perfect world, 10- to 12-year-old black boys in America *shouldn’t* be arrested for throwing a ball too hard in a dodgeball game, or shot dead by police within 1.2 seconds for playing with Nerf guns in a public park. But here we are. Word. Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 And up until 5 days ago in California you could be cuffed and tossed into the paddywagon for being in the wrong place at the wrong time while having a condom in your possession ... by that I do not mean a coke-filled rubber up your hole. Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 But in the Prague 'cute boys' thread we just now have an orgy poster "Boys Party Hard" depicting old and very young males figuratively in flagrante delicto according to the image ... not literally as the age is likely vetted. However, it is "exclusively bareback" so condom possession is not a liability. :-J Why flaunt, however innocent the intent? Grand jury not dismissed. Quote
Members pauleiro Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 2 hours ago, Riobard said: And up until 5 days ago in California you could be cuffed and tossed into the paddywagon for being in the wrong place at the wrong time while having a condom in your possession ... by that I do not mean a coke-filled rubber up your hole. What do you mean ? What happened ? Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 6 hours ago, Tartegogo said: Well I hereby inform you all that when I use “sex with boys” on this forum, I mean guys over 18. This is the last time I explain. I won’t bother to reply to those who pretend not to understand. I think we need to have a rule on this forum: assume good faith = If there are multiple interpretation of what someone says, we should assume the most charitable interpretation of what was said (“he uses a word in a different way from me”), not the worst (“he is a pedophile and a criminal”). I mean, look at this thread. All the OP wanted was to know how many. Now the thread is about crime. Without that rule, this place is toxic, which is why I am only here when I really need to. We, here, should and can do, regarding the language terms at issue. Evangelista, Wintour, Abundance, and Ferocity are sufficiently unified houses. What we should not do, as a rule, is equate AYOR reminders and healthy inquiry and debate with toxic. Even if it appears conflictual. A rightful platitude of courtesy goes no distance in disabusing the outside societal gaze's misconstrued interpretations. The thread overall has influenced my thinking and content going forward. The spiciness not unlike smallpox variolation, particularly if it turns out beneficial for even a mere handful, but that concept is perhaps best inserted into a Deadwood episode script. It was, therefore, serendipitous that the new member happened to use terms frequently employed here, and for which there may be an increased trend for commentary. He asked neither for critique nor caped crusaders. Per diem volume is a worthwhile topic though I have yet to find it personally relatable. Suum cuique. Do and write what you like. Free cou ... well, Some free countries. Others less so. Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 5 minutes ago, pauleiro said: What do you mean ? What happened ? A break for Cal commercial sex workers. Condom possession alone had been incriminatory. Imagine the convoluted thinking that took so long to shift ... the necessitated default of barebacking would decrease prostitution. Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 4 hours ago, numazu1 said: Amen to this. I’m the same way. Present progressive without random abrupt shift to past perfect. I like it. It is presently perfect. [Teasing] Quote
Members pauleiro Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 8 minutes ago, Riobard said: A break for Cal commercial sex workers. Condom possession alone had been incriminatory. Imagine the convoluted thinking that took so long to shift ... the necessitated default of barebacking would decrease prostitution. I just cannot believe that the mere possession of a condom can lead to incrimination at least in a civilized country. Quote
Members SolaceSoul Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 46 minutes ago, Riobard said: We, here, should and can do, regarding the language terms at issue. Evangelista, Wintour, Abundance, and Ferocity are sufficiently unified houses. Strike a Pose. Give good face! Riobard 1 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 35 minutes ago, SolaceSoul said: Strike a Pose. Give good face! Adult only Ballroom, no reckless BB. PrEP, no preppies. Quote
Members SolaceSoul Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 4 minutes ago, Riobard said: Adult only Ballroom, no reckless BB. PrEP, no preppies. Category is.... LATAM rough trade! Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 5, 2019 Members Posted August 5, 2019 (edited) Realness ... 10! Edited August 5, 2019 by Riobard Splng Quote
paborn Posted August 6, 2019 Posted August 6, 2019 7 hours ago, tassojunior said: St8 men talk about fucking "girls" without underage assumed. Boys/Girls is just commonly used (maybe wrongly) in talk about sex on both sides. Only with gays is there often connection with pedophilia. So, let me understand , you've just become aware that the world is not always friendly to gays.... good. You will be better for that realization. SolaceSoul 1 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 6, 2019 Members Posted August 6, 2019 (edited) Actually, across a span of 42 years of gay culture immersion, I do not recall the use of "boy" employed at all for young adult sex partner. We might casually say "nice boy" to generically describe any pleasant male. The avoidance seemed not to do with distancing from a paedo stereotype, and there were virtually no linguistic remnants of oppression in my particular settings. As a boy, I was typically addressed by my name or the alternately affectionate or stern sobriquet "young man". Our male dog would be called "boy" a lot. My initial broader exposure to the more widespread use of the single-word term occurred here, employed to refer to: the employed. Perhaps south of the 49th parallel it denotes servitude, or to emphasize some class distinction, maybe not even that consciously. My gay community peers not in our tribe would think it odd to describe a casual trick of any legal age, or a seller, as "boy". Edited August 6, 2019 by Riobard Spacing Quote
paborn Posted August 6, 2019 Posted August 6, 2019 "Actually, across a span of 42 years of gay culture immersion, I do not recall the use of "boy" employed at all for young adult sex partner. We might casually say "nice boy" to generically describe any pleasant male." You, perhaps have not noticed the title of this forum. My gay community peers not in our tribe " This are, perhaps, those who do NOT read a forum clearly named: Boy-Toy . But, have they never read "The Person Boy" or the Greek myths? Really? Personally , I celebrate, each April 25 the Roman holiday of Robigallia Day to honor the tax contributions of the boy prostitutes of Ancient Rome. The usage is not restricted to south of the 49th. Riobard 1 Quote
Members RA1 Posted August 6, 2019 Members Posted August 6, 2019 In the South a lot of white adult males refer to each other as "boy". Also, as one advances in age, a boy seems to become someone younger than 45 or so. Neither suggests any age younger than 18. A Southern racial slur that I recall my father (innocently using) was to call an older Black man, "young man" which seems to suggest he is still vigorous. In more recent times I have been called that by middle aged Black men. I mildly resented it and I am sure those my father called did also. I have never used such an appellation. OTOH I mildly resent Black boys (those much younger than 18) who object to being called "boy". This is a learned bad lesson. For further instruction on these points just listen to a Black male coach talk to his charges. And, close your ears. Best regards. RA1 Riobard 1 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 6, 2019 Members Posted August 6, 2019 (edited) Like I said, it was a foreign concept to use in my circles in the 20th century context, UNTIL I then personally discovered the Board. And I never used the defunct Rentboy. Robigallia has the ring of Renaissance Fair for NAMBLA. Substitute Thomasin or Frideswide with Caligula. LOL Escorts of both gender north of the low-to-mid40's counted among my practice clients, so I was not so naïvely sheltered. I think my peer group's scandalous irony was less embedded in ancient history, a more serious if interesting academic realization, and more reflected in the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence movement. Edited August 6, 2019 by Riobard Erratum Quote
paborn Posted August 6, 2019 Posted August 6, 2019 (edited) First, I apologize to one and all for my bad eyesight- two operations and computer glare still foils me. I meant, of course, "THESE are" and the PERSIAN boy., I will try to be more careful in the future. Still, it is worth pointing out that @SolaceSoul was not being pedantic. We can all find innocent uses of the word "boy" but his point, I believe, was that Federal authorities are likely to take the most pejorative view possible. Edited August 6, 2019 by Paborn1340 Riobard and SolaceSoul 2 Quote
Members Riobard Posted August 6, 2019 Members Posted August 6, 2019 Worth a look. Interestingly, the novel's narrator castrated, and the book cover illustration further feminizes him viz Female head (Michelangelo). paborn 1 Quote