Coming Out Day - I salute you all

[TotallyOz]

Sorry, I missed October 11 and the National Coming Out Day.  I had 3 Thai guys and a beard full of cum!  And, the party continues as I went to pick up another one day.  I figured Coming Out Day needed some Cumming out of others and into or onto me!

[Latbear4blk]

12 hours ago, TotallyOz said:

Sorry, I missed October 11 and the National Coming Out Day.  I had 3 Thai guys and a beard full of cum!  And, the party continues as I went to pick up another one day.  I figured Coming Out Day needed some Cumming out of others and into or onto me!

Do not say sorry if there is no sorrow!

[Lucky]

Coming out was no lark for me. No one made jokes about cumming out. It was quite serious. It affected my parents, my siblings, my friends and acquaintances, and, of course, me. I took my good old time about it, finally waiting until I had finished law school and had no excuse not to turn to the most pressing problem I had. Naturally once I was out, I felt great. I wondered why I had taken so long. Rather than inhibit my career, it advanced it.

So it's not a joke, and many gays agonize about it for years. They fear society's reaction, their family's reaction, and the reaction from their friends. Most people get a supportive response, but not everyone does. Some hurt even worse for coming out. Family ties suffer. Depression and drugs sometimes come into play.

It's not a joke. It's an important advancement for thousands of people. They should be congratulated for coming out, and National Coming Out Day should be a serious day.

Now I know for a fact that not all members here are out, so congratulating all of us is not yet the appropriate comment. Encouraging people to come out might help, especially if you share positive stories about your own coming out.

[TotallyOz]

I, for one, am out and have shared my coming out story on here.  It was quite a riveting read! I am sure many are not out at work or in other spaces, but as the ebb and flow of societal acceptance grows and then wanes, I am not sure that everyone feels the safe space they did just two years ago.

[RockHardNYC]

Coming out should be a party, an event wholly worth celebrating. IMO, it's so much more important, gratifying, and life-affirming than losing any friend or family member because that asshole is a homophobic jerk. If you're gay, I don't think you really know who loves you until you do come out. Coming out is an act of loving yourself. I wouldn't want to go through life not loving who I am.

Times have seriously changed in this country. Perhaps change is taking place all over the world. Younger people seem to be more fearless, and I think that's a great quality to possess.

Sure, there are exceptions. There will always be haters. There will always be bullies. Some people just won't be able to handle the EJ Johnson types. The world will always have homophobic assholes who wish to do harm to others because they hate their own fear of being gay. But change has mostly crushed those folks, and they will continue to get crushed.

I was lucky. In my teenage years, I was surrounded by gay folks. I worked in show business from a young age. In high school, my best friend was out and in a relationship. He found love with another kid his own age. My friend's father was a trucker. His mother was a born-again Christian. He told his parents at a very early age and nothing could affect their love for him. I wanted to believe all coming out stories could be this easy.

I was eighteen when I told my parents. My mother was easier than my father, but time took care of the details. Eventually, their love for me grew and grew. They truly enjoyed my gay friends. I think much of their initial concern was centered around whether I could take care of myself. By the age of twenty-five, they had no doubts.

The act of coming out is a celebration. It's a commitment to loving yourself. Joy and laughter should be a part of the experience.

[Latbear4blk]

There is a difference between having a sense go humor and making jokes about coming out, and thinking that coming out is a joke. I am for laughing at everything, which does not mean I do not take anything seriously. And I start by laughing at myself.

I came out back in the 80s, when I was in my early 20s, in 1985, in Argentina. Once I came out to my parents, I went for 100% openness in all my circles, including my job. After I moved to the USA, I made a decision that is always in question. I do not discuss my sexuality with my students. My supervisors and every single colleague that interacts with me beyond a formal conversation know who I am and what I like. I even have a couple of colleagues/friends who know about me hiring escorts and having a blog about it. 

To me and to most of the guys from my generation, coming out had a strong heroic/ethical component. However, its meaning is changing as its significance is. I know younger guys who laugh at me when I share how dramatic it was for me the whole process back in the 80s. I do not get offended, rather the opposite. I am happy so many guys do not have to go through this process nowadays, I am happy they can laugh at me. 

[BiBottomBoy]

Yeah.

The sense I get from younger guys is that this generation just assumes everyone is bi or something so there doesn't have to be a big annoucnement.

[RockHardNYC]

On 10/18/2018 at 6:55 PM, Latbear4blk said:

I even have a couple of colleagues/friends who know about me hiring escorts and having a blog about it. 

Are you using an alias name on your blog? I tend to be more cautious than others, but I find that bloggers are very easy to identify in this day and age, especially if they're writing controversial thoughts. I suspect that far more people know who you are than you think. If I were a teacher, I'd be very concerned about that.

[RockHardNYC]

20 hours ago, BiBottomBoy said:

The sense I get from younger guys is that this generation just assumes everyone is bi

I work with a lot of college age guys. Interns and assistants. I wouldn't go as far you did, but the younger generation, particularly in larger cities is much less uptight than we ever were. Still, even bi guys get their epiphany.

[Latbear4blk]

1 hour ago, RockHardNYC said:

Are you using an alias name on your blog? I tend to be more cautious than others, but I find that bloggers are very easy to identify in this day and age, especially if they're writing controversial thoughts. I suspect that far more people know who you are than you think. If I were a teacher, I'd be very concerned about that.

I take my precautions, tanks for the concern.

Besides, I suspect far less people know about my blog than you think. I am concerned about that, I am trying to expand my readership. 

[BiBottomBoy]

I think it's harder to come out as bi than gay.

The gays and straights alike think you are faking your straightness.

[Latbear4blk]

1 hour ago, BiBottomBoy said:

I think it's harder to come out as bi than gay.

The gays and straights alike think you are faking your straightness.

I think you are outdated at least a couple of decades. 

[BiBottomBoy]

At age 50 that's possible.

[RockHardNYC]

On 10/20/2018 at 7:52 AM, Latbear4blk said:

I suspect far less people know about my blog than you think.

That's what all keepers-of-secrets like to believe. I mean no offense when I call that: denial.

I apologize for my cynicism. It's based on life experience. People like to talk and gossip. It's human nature and it can't be controlled. The only way to control what people say about you behind your back, you must never show yourself to them.

There are very few people in my life whom I trust 100%. In my circle of friends and loved ones, I think I am the most trustworthy. If you ask me to keep something private, I honor your wishes. I'm adamant about it based on all the betrayals I've experienced in life.

I'm self-employed, and I have been for a very long time. I have the luxury of not caring what people think of me. However, my competitors can say what they want to say. They often make things up to gain the advantage. But my work always speaks for itself. To protect my business, I share no personal information. I made this decision decades ago when I left my corporate life. It was my corporate life that taught me the realities of human nature. When you have a "boss," all it takes is one liar, one enemy, one troublemaker, and you can find your business life turned upside down.

Teaching can be a conservative business. It can also be competitive and political. It seems to me, the last thing a professional teacher would want to do is be associated with illegal sex acts. That's no way to introduce sex education into the curriculum.

I understand the desire to speak your truth and exercise your inner Siskel & Ebert. When it comes to the subject of sex, that's where the word "anonymous" plays an important role in life.

But I have a child, so I have very strong opinions about protecting livelihood. Whatever I do, whatever mistakes I make, it affects others I love.

[BiBottomBoy]

thing is if the dude can talk to people about escorts and not get in trouble about it it's obviously working for him.

[RockHardNYC]

8 hours ago, BiBottomBoy said:

it's obviously working for him

Until it destroys his livelihood and he's banned from working in education. All it takes is one angry escort to call the Board of Education.

I don't understand why any "teacher" would take such risks over the opportunity to blog about escort encounters. What is there to gain by being a "known" reviewer of escorts? Is Victor Powers happy with his review? Will Victor Powers be recommending the "reviewer" to other escorts? Why would any escort be interested in having sex with a "review" blogger? I suppose some escorts are dumb and might view the opportunity as free publicity. Smart escorts would run in the opposite direction, unless there was a guarantee of a great review.

I just don't get it.

[BiBottomBoy]

But he's been doing it for years.

[RockHardNYC]

2 hours ago, BiBottomBoy said:

But he's been doing it for years.

And Michael Cohen, the lawyer, has been fixing Donald Trump's mistakes for years, as well. Need I say more?

[BiBottomBoy]

Maybe he is Michael Cohen!

[RockHardNYC]

5 hours ago, BiBottomBoy said:

Maybe he is Michael Cohen!

Jews have been known to like pinga.

[AdamSmith]

8 hours ago, RockHardNYC said:

Jews have been known to like pinga.

There is indeed this hypothesis about Yeshua bar Joseph and his disciples themselves...

...may Yahweh strike me down!

[BiBottomBoy]

Pinga for all!