A Newbie's First Time in Brazil

[Badboy81]

3 hours ago, Suckrates said:

 

I dont agree that threads exist or should exist for "positive" commentary only.    There is a yin and yang to everything in life.  Negativity is part of lifes fabric.  Threads laden with only positively are unbalanced and often come off fake and contrived.  HOWEVER, I also believe its not WHAT you say but how you say it.   There is a way to respond negatively WITHOUT an attack on the person posting, and I think THAT'S the real issue...  While I have been guilty many, many times of attacking posters, its usually after the fact once they attack me for my comment.  Some people can just make you lose it !    Keeping yourself in check is one of the most difficult things to do on forums where your anonymity shields you, but I am a work in progress.    

I 100% agree with you on this...the concern if somebody automatically feels a certain kind of way, ANYTHING can be received as negative....especially in an ocean of "positiveness and total agreeing..."

I didnt attack the poster at all...But hey, thats old news

Thanks for your feedback...I never want to come off as fake and contrived since I dont agree with everything everybody posts on here

[floridarob]

8 hours ago, TotallyOz said:

I don't see you or Badboy or Rockhard as difficult to deal with.  But, I am too mellow.  Maybe the weed?

Maybe the sex......?

[Walker]

5 hours ago, Badboy81 said:

I 100% agree with you on this...the concern if somebody automatically feels a certain kind of way, ANYTHING can be received as negative....especially in an ocean of "positiveness and total agreeing..."

I totally agree.

[TotallyOz]

10 hours ago, Badboy81 said:

I 100% agree with you on this...the concern if somebody automatically feels a certain kind of way, ANYTHING can be received as negative....especially in an ocean of "positiveness and total agreeing..."

I didnt attack the poster at all...But hey, thats old news

Thanks for your feedback...I never want to come off as fake and contrived since I dont agree with everything everybody posts on here

Who the fuck said everything had to be positive?  I didn't.  Did I?  I don't expect all sunshine and bubbles. What I do expect is a decorum and when you disagree with someone, do it in a respectful way.  It is as simple as that.  And, guess what?  I am the one that gets to decide! Ain't that a shit?

[Tartegogo]

1 hour ago, TotallyOz said:

Who the fuck said everything had to be positive?  I didn't.  Did I?  I don't expect all sunshine and bubbles. What I do expect is a decorum and when you disagree with someone, do it in a respectful way.  It is as simple as that.  And, guess what?  I am the one that gets to decide! Ain't that a shit?

Agree this is Oz’s website, this is not a free speech forum. 

I strongly recommend that you do as Oz wants, or get out. 

There are free speech forums out there for you to use if you want to be negative. 

[Riobard]

I think it is about how, where, and whether to critique, not just about  positive versus negative tone prerogative/rights 

Rotten Tomatoes is a good comparator. Hired reviewers and often amateur commentators comment on a film. The composite yields an emoji ranging from a superlative tomato, ripe tomato, to splattered green tomato. But reviews are simply out there ... not "Dear Ms Gerwig, direction props to you ... not Hey, "Mr Ivory, you took too much screenwriting license altering Aciman's novel ... me no likey".

There is plenty of option to weigh in on most BT topics. For example, you can opine "that film was lacklustre in plotline", "that book was too long", "that sauna sucks big time".

But person-to-person, as lopsided and contrary to freedom of expression as it may seem, we are called on to bite our tongue and restrict feedback to feel-good emojis or a positive comment. A personalized negative commentary simply does not get well-absorbed even if seemingly buried within a larger quantity of positives. Etiquette trumps rights. 

The overarching principle is not freedom of speech, "x" amendment rights. It is self-reflection and manners. Do not count on readers to read between the lines and soften your expression for you, even if you did not intend to come across as harsh. 

The current example reflected that the commentor's attention span, patience, and literary style preference did not match up well with the OP's narrative, though it worked for others. Nothing wrong with that. It simply necessitated cultivating self-awareness and exercising good judgment about how to express the reality. I certainly myself have to try to finesse this better. I too struggle with whether to take the rap versus getting into a bit of a pissing contest. 

But look how much time and effort was spent in the aftermath, all that attention span time resource diverted from the OP's quadrilogy! 

[Suckrates]

3 hours ago, TotallyOz said:

Who the fuck said everything had to be positive?  I didn't.  Did I?  I don't expect all sunshine and bubbles. What I do expect is a decorum and when you disagree with someone, do it in a respectful way.  It is as simple as that.  And, guess what?  I am the one that gets to decide! Ain't that a shit?

You almost had me here, but your last comment took it to "Daddy" territory, and that aint cute !    But perhaps that was "weed" induced as well,  so ill just overlook it and move along... 

[TotallyOz]

5 minutes ago, Suckrates said:

You almost had me here, but your last comment took it to "Daddy" territory, and that aint cute !    But perhaps that was "weed" induced as well,  so ill just overlook it and move along... 

In the end, we all have mommy and daddy issues that arise. Right Grandma?

[AdamSmith]

1 hour ago, Tartegogo said:

Agree this is Oz’s website, this is not a free speech forum. 

"Freedom of the press is guaranteed only to those who own one." A.J. Liebling

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A._J._Liebling

[AdamSmith]

6 minutes ago, TotallyOz said:

In the end, we all have mommy and daddy issues that arise. Right Grandma?

https://steemit.com/psychology/@sterlinluxan/sex-cocaine-and-cigars-a-brief-overview-and-criticism-of-freud-s-groundbreaking-theories

[Suckrates]

1 hour ago, TotallyOz said:

In the end, we all have mommy and daddy issues that arise. Right Grandma?

 

[Latbear4blk]

I would be slightly more tolerant than thinking of banning anyone. Let me try my way to say it, I think I am tuned with those criticizing @Badboy81's post.

If you want to be negative in a not constructive way, just to spit your disgust for someone or for something, please feel free to do it. But suck it up when you are called out as the negative asshole you are, without bringing freedom of speech to the table. Just suck it up.

 

[Riobard]

For those keen on a version of the Vidigal Beebs look. there is a fellow "Roberto" available in Madrid. Also not consistently shock-dyed. 

 

[Suckrates]

41 minutes ago, Latbear4blk said:

I would be slightly more tolerant than thinking of banning anyone. Let me try my way to say it, I think I am tuned with those criticizing @Badboy81's post.

If you want to be negative in a not constructive way, just to spit your disgust for someone or for something, please feel free to do it. But suck it up when you are called out as the negative asshole you are, without bringing freedom of speech to the table. Just suck it up.

 

 

[Suckrates]

 

Some things just really arent worth making such a fuss over....

 

[AdamSmith]

1 hour ago, Suckrates said:

So @Badboy81 in effect returned us to the much reviled POOP thread?

Only too apt! 

[AdamSmith]

[Badboy81]

11 hours ago, Tartegogo said:

Agree this is Oz’s website, this is not a free speech forum. 

I strongly recommend that you do as Oz wants, or get out. 

There are free speech forums out there for you to use if you want to be negative. 

Now that I know this is Oz's website, Ill definitely watch what I type and how I say it so that I don't irritate him...Honestly didn't know he was the one running things...

[Badboy81]

13 hours ago, TotallyOz said:

Who the fuck said everything had to be positive?  I didn't.  Did I?  I don't expect all sunshine and bubbles. What I do expect is a decorum and when you disagree with someone, do it in a respectful way.  It is as simple as that.  And, guess what?  I am the one that gets to decide! Ain't that a shit?

perception becomes reality and all is lost.” What people perceive is usually what they believe, and this is based on what they hear, see and think.

Most of the time we cannot control what happens but we can always control our reactions.

Not sure why you were angry enough to curse or demean me based on me saying that somebodies feedback was long, hard to understand based on their writing style and compared then to another guy who posts long and hard to follow posts as well...

But I definitely dont want to anger the person who decides who can post or be a member of the forum so I will do a better job of checking comments that I post to make sure I am not ruffling any feathers and will take your advice and simply not reply at all...

The End....Next topic

[floridarob]

1 minute ago, Badboy81 said:

perception becomes reality and all is lost.” What people perceive is usually what they believe, and this is based on what they hear, see and think.

Most of the time we cannot control what happens but we can always control our reactions.

Not sure why you were angry enough to curse or demean me based on me saying that somebodies feedback was long, hard to understand based on their writing style and compared then to another guy who posts long and hard to follow posts as well...

 

like now?

[AdamSmith]

15 hours ago, TotallyOz said:

Ain't that a shit?

And you allowed that aforementioned POOP thread to run  on and on and on! 

[AdamSmith]

2 hours ago, Badboy81 said:

but we can always control our reactions.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Logorrhea_(psychology)

Logorrhea (psychology)

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

 

This article is about the psychological term. For the linguistic and stylistic term, see Logorrhoea (rhetoric).

In psychology, logorrhea or logorrhoea (from Ancient Greek λόγος logos "word" and ῥέω rheo "to flow") is a communication disorder that causes excessive wordiness and talkativeness, which can sometimes lead to incoherency. Logorrhea is sometimes classified as a mental illness and can result from a variety of psychiatric and neurological disorders^[1] including aphasia,^[2] localized cortical lesions in the thalamus,^[3][4] mania,^{[citation needed]} or most typically in catatonic schizophrenia.^{[citation needed]}

Examples of logorrhea might include talking or mumbling monotonously, either to others, or more likely to oneself. This may include the repetition of particular words or phrases, often incoherently. The causes of logorrhea remain poorly understood, but appear to be localized to frontal lobe structures known to be associated with language. As is the case, for example, in emotional lability in a wide variety of neurological conditions, other symptoms take priority in clinical management and research efforts. Other symptoms include excessive talking, words that avoid any logic or reason, words that may offend other people and random words which hearers may ascribe unintended meaning to.

[msclelovr]

I find this site very useful overall.

Somehow I miss all the controversies that flare up from time to time. 

Perhaps it’s my ability to scroll through threads rapidly that serves me well.

[AdamSmith]

On 3/18/2018 at 9:15 AM, msclelovr said:

Somehow I miss all the controversies that flare up from time to time. 

Just like hemorrhoids! 

[DustinDawns]

On 2/27/2018 at 12:11 AM, numazu1 said:

 

 

One last thing from this video, a shot of one of the hunks. If you ever have to imagine what Gabriel looks like, he may look like this (with way more muscle):

  

 

I am truly jealous of your connection to Gabriel if he looks like this gentleman here. Absolutely the pinnacle (in my opinion and taste) of Brazilian beauty and the mixed genes.