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Suckrates

Take Note People

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Posted
1 hour ago, MsAnn said:

Last time I was at Pubics, I accidentally picked up a box of these...:o

http://www.ritzcrackers.com/~/media/ritzcrackers/images/varieties/products/png/480x480/ritz-crackers-reduced-fat.png?h=363&la=en&w=384

I mean really...what's the point. :P

 

Well, if you are eatting them alone, or topped with something, every little calorie you save is Helpful, (especially for you dear).

BUT if you are using them in cooking like I suggest, getting the FULL flavor from 100% fat makes the difference.  

PS - you can serve the reduced fat to your rent boys and they will THINK you are in shape !  :lol::lol:  (But you will need to leave the Box on display, cause just looking at you, they might NOT believe it)  :rolleyes:

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Posted
2 minutes ago, AdamSmith said:

landscape-1444401542-still-drunk.jpg

Well Mr Smith,  after revealing that you walk 2 miles a day, it is apparent you DO NOT need to be concerned about some extra fat content.  However, the most strenuous thing our Ms Annie does is hoist herself onto a bar stool, so low fat should work for her.

Guest Larstrup
Posted
2 hours ago, MsAnn said:

Last time I was at Pubics,

 

It's one thing to misspell Publix as Publics. But omg, Pubics!

Guest Larstrup
Posted
2 minutes ago, AdamSmith said:

PS Here's that juice brand whose praises I was singing...

20120320-evolution-juice.jpg

After that midget pissing in the pool, I wouldn't go near the orange. What an odd placement. :o

After further review - never-mind about the pissing. :blush:

Guest Larstrup
Posted
34 minutes ago, AdamSmith said:

PS Here's that juice brand whose praises I was singing...

20120320-evolution-juice.jpg

These are actually available at my Publix! I will check them out. I never mind paying a bit more for a better juice. Here's a locator, perhaps a morning walk via an alternate route to change things up a bit might be evolutionary for the soul :rolleyes:

Show Me Juice!  (may Richard Dawson RIP)

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Posted
36 minutes ago, AdamSmith said:

...like this?

7a5cc099b021b89eefaac3546f584697.jpg

:D

 

 

Grandma loves these "little nuggets".  One of the best BJ's I ever gave was to a "little person", his already substantial cock seemed so much more mammoth, it was a VISUAL feast.   

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Posted
2 minutes ago, Larstrup said:

These are actually available at my Publix! I will check them out. I never mind paying a bit more for a better juice. Here's a locator, perhaps a morning walk via an alternate route to change things up a bit might be evolutionary for the soul :rolleyes:

Show Me Juice!  (may Richard Dawson RIP)

 

Maybe I'm being persnickety, but I cant drink anything GREEN.  Its like drinking a bottle of vomit or baby poop.  

Posted
38 minutes ago, Suckrates said:

Maybe I'm being persnickety, but I cant drink anything GREEN.  Its like drinking a bottle of vomit or baby poop.  

LOL

The green juices in that brand are the first I've ever had that tasted good.

Posted
1 hour ago, Suckrates said:

Maybe I'm being persnickety, but I cant drink anything GREEN.  Its like drinking a bottle of vomit or baby poop.  

Crunchy Frog

Inspector: 'ELLO!

Mr. Hilton: 'Ello.

Inspector: Mr. 'ilton?

Hilton: A-yes?

Inspector: You are the sole proprietor and owner of the Whizzo Chocolate Company?

Mr. Hilton: I am, yes.

Inspector: Constable Clitoris and I are from the 'ygiene squad, and we'd like to have a word with you about your box of chocolates entitled the 'Whizzo Quality Assortment'.

Mr. Hilton: Oh, yes.

Inspector: If I may begin at the beginning. First there is the Cherry Fondue. Now this is extremely nasty. (pause) But we can't prosecute you for that.

Mr. Hilton: Ah, agreed.

Inspector: Then we have number four. Number four: Crunchy Frog.

Mr. Hilton: Yes.

Inspector: Am I right in thinking there's a real frog in 'ere?

Mr. Hilton: Yes, a little one.

Inspector: What sort of frog?

Mr. Hilton: A...a *dead* frog.

Inspector: Is it cooked?

Mr. Hilton: No.

Inspector: What, a RAW frog?!?

Mr. Hilton: Oh, we use only the finest baby frogs, dew-picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in the finest quality spring water, lightly killed, and sealed in a succulent, Swiss, quintuple-smooth, treble-milk chocolate envelope, and lovingly frosted with glucose.

Inspector: That's as may be, but it's still a frog!

Mr. Hilton: What else?

Inspector: Well, don't you even take the bones out?

Mr. Hilton: If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy, would it?

Inspector: Constable Clitoris et one of those!! We have to protect the public!

Constable: Uh, would you excuse me a moment, Sir? (exits)

Inspector: We have to protect the public! People aren't going to think there's a real frog in chocolate! Constable Clitoris thought it was an almond whirl! They're bound to expect some sort of mock frog!

Mr. Hilton: (outraged) MOCK frog!?! We use NO artificial additives or preservatives of ANY kind!

Inspector: Nevertheless, I advise you in future to replace the words 'Crunchy Frog' with the legend, 'Crunchy, Raw, Unboned Real Dead Frog' if you wish to avoid prosecution!

Mr. Hilton: What about our sales?

Inspector: FUCK your sales! We've got to protect the public! Now what about this one, number five, it was number five, wasn't it? Number five: Ram's Bladder Cup. (beat) Now, what sort of confectionery is that?

Mr. Hilton: Oh, we use only the finest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish Ram's bladder, emptied, steamed, flavoured with sesame seeds, whipped into a fondue, and garnished with lark's vomit.

Inspector: LARK'S VOMIT?!?!?

Mr. Hilton: Correct.

Inspector: It doesn't say anything here about lark's vomit!

Mr. Hilton: Ah, it does, on the bottom of the box, after 'monosodium glutamate'.

Inspector: I hardly think that's good enough! I think it's be more appropriate if the box bore a great red label: 'WARNING: LARK'S VOMIT!!!'

Mr. Hilton: Our sales would plummet!

Inspector: (screaming) Well why don't you move into more conventional areas of confectionary??!!

(the constable returns)

Inspector: Like Praline, or, or Lime Creme, a very popular flavor, I'm lead to understand. Or Raspberry Delite. I mean, what's this one, what's this one? 'Ere we are: Cockroach Cluster! -- Anthrax Ripple!

Constable: MMMMWWWAAAAAGGGGGHHHH!! (Throws up in helmet)

Inspector: (continuing) And what is this one: Spring Surprise?

Mr. Hilton: Ah, that's one of our specialities. Covered in dark, velvety chocolate, when you pop it into your mouth, stainless steel bolts spring out and plunge straight through both cheeks.

Inspector: (stunned) Well where's the pleasure in THAT?!? If people pop a nice little chockie into their mouth, they don't expect to get their cheeks pierced!!! In any case, it is an inadequate description of the sweetmeat. I shall have to ask you to accompany me to the station.

Mr. Hilton: (shrugging) It's a fair cop.

Inspector: And DON'T talk to the audience.

http://www.montypython.net/scripts/crunchy.php

 

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Posted
38 minutes ago, AdamSmith said:

Crunchy Frog

Inspector: 'ELLO!

Mr. Hilton: 'Ello.

Inspector: Mr. 'ilton?

Hilton: A-yes?

Inspector: You are the sole proprietor and owner of the Whizzo Chocolate Company?

Mr. Hilton: I am, yes.

Inspector: Constable Clitoris and I are from the 'ygiene squad, and we'd like to have a word with you about your box of chocolates entitled the 'Whizzo Quality Assortment'.

Mr. Hilton: Oh, yes.

Inspector: If I may begin at the beginning. First there is the Cherry Fondue. Now this is extremely nasty. (pause) But we can't prosecute you for that.

Mr. Hilton: Ah, agreed.

Inspector: Then we have number four. Number four: Crunchy Frog.

Mr. Hilton: Yes.

Inspector: Am I right in thinking there's a real frog in 'ere?

Mr. Hilton: Yes, a little one.

Inspector: What sort of frog?

Mr. Hilton: A...a *dead* frog.

Inspector: Is it cooked?

Mr. Hilton: No.

Inspector: What, a RAW frog?!?

Mr. Hilton: Oh, we use only the finest baby frogs, dew-picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in the finest quality spring water, lightly killed, and sealed in a succulent, Swiss, quintuple-smooth, treble-milk chocolate envelope, and lovingly frosted with glucose.

Inspector: That's as may be, but it's still a frog!

Mr. Hilton: What else?

Inspector: Well, don't you even take the bones out?

Mr. Hilton: If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy, would it?

Inspector: Constable Clitoris et one of those!! We have to protect the public!

Constable: Uh, would you excuse me a moment, Sir? (exits)

Inspector: We have to protect the public! People aren't going to think there's a real frog in chocolate! Constable Clitoris thought it was an almond whirl! They're bound to expect some sort of mock frog!

Mr. Hilton: (outraged) MOCK frog!?! We use NO artificial additives or preservatives of ANY kind!

Inspector: Nevertheless, I advise you in future to replace the words 'Crunchy Frog' with the legend, 'Crunchy, Raw, Unboned Real Dead Frog' if you wish to avoid prosecution!

Mr. Hilton: What about our sales?

Inspector: FUCK your sales! We've got to protect the public! Now what about this one, number five, it was number five, wasn't it? Number five: Ram's Bladder Cup. (beat) Now, what sort of confectionery is that?

Mr. Hilton: Oh, we use only the finest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish Ram's bladder, emptied, steamed, flavoured with sesame seeds, whipped into a fondue, and garnished with lark's vomit.

Inspector: LARK'S VOMIT?!?!?

Mr. Hilton: Correct.

Inspector: It doesn't say anything here about lark's vomit!

Mr. Hilton: Ah, it does, on the bottom of the box, after 'monosodium glutamate'.

Inspector: I hardly think that's good enough! I think it's be more appropriate if the box bore a great red label: 'WARNING: LARK'S VOMIT!!!'

Mr. Hilton: Our sales would plummet!

Inspector: (screaming) Well why don't you move into more conventional areas of confectionary??!!

(the constable returns)

Inspector: Like Praline, or, or Lime Creme, a very popular flavor, I'm lead to understand. Or Raspberry Delite. I mean, what's this one, what's this one? 'Ere we are: Cockroach Cluster! -- Anthrax Ripple!

Constable: MMMMWWWAAAAAGGGGGHHHH!! (Throws up in helmet)

Inspector: (continuing) And what is this one: Spring Surprise?

Mr. Hilton: Ah, that's one of our specialities. Covered in dark, velvety chocolate, when you pop it into your mouth, stainless steel bolts spring out and plunge straight through both cheeks.

Inspector: (stunned) Well where's the pleasure in THAT?!? If people pop a nice little chockie into their mouth, they don't expect to get their cheeks pierced!!! In any case, it is an inadequate description of the sweetmeat. I shall have to ask you to accompany me to the station.

Mr. Hilton: (shrugging) It's a fair cop.

Inspector: And DON'T talk to the audience.

http://www.montypython.net/scripts/crunchy.php

 

TOO MUCH thinking on those walks Mr Smith !  :P

 

Posted
6 hours ago, Larstrup said:

These are actually available at my Publix! I will check them out. I never mind paying a bit more for a better juice. Here's a locator, perhaps a morning walk via an alternate route to change things up a bit might be evolutionary for the soul :rolleyes:

Show Me Juice!  (may Richard Dawson RIP)

The back label explains they are "cold-pressed" instead of the usual process of being heat-pasteurized, which messes with the flavor.

Posted

Another thing. At the grocery, I have to look and look to find my cran-pom juice hiding somewhere on that wall of "juices," 95% of which are juice "cocktails" loaded up with corn syrup and other crapola. One more reason we are a Nation of Wide Loads.

florida-brevard-county-cocoa-beach-walgr

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Posted
21 minutes ago, AdamSmith said:

Another thing. At the grocery, I have to look and look to find my cran-pom juice hiding somewhere on that wall of "juices," 95% of which are juice "cocktails" loaded up with corn syrup and other crapola. One more reason we are a Nation of Wide Loads.

florida-brevard-county-cocoa-beach-walgr

 

YUP, you need to read every label and look for "NO SUGAR ADDED".  My fave of these is the Ocean Spray Cran-Lemonade (I tried the Cran-Lime but didnt like it as much).  

Back in the day, Grandma used to spend her time cruising the supermarket aisles for BOYS.....  Now I am consumed with cruising for "healthy" food and drink.   Damn, aging is a kick in the ass !   

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