Where is Trilingual now ?

[Guest middlemedio]

My very first trip to Brazil in early 2000 was one adventure I will treasure and remember to my retirement years.   I owe it all to the great Trilingual which started the Brazil thread in an earlier site before this.  Anybody know his whereabouts?  Still in Brazil ?

[msclelovr]

As I recall, several years ago, he had moved back to the US. He was then living in the basement of his parents house. I can't remember precisely where, but it was in the Midwest - Kansas city, possibly?

[TownsendPLocke]

How strange- I was wondering this myself yesterday!

 

[Tomcal]

Around 2007 or so he moved into the basement of his sisters house in Kansas City where his elderly parents were. I believe he moved into his own apt several years ago and he is still in KC, you can find him on FB!

[floridarob]

a lesson to all.......don't get so CRAZY in love with a boy in another country that you blow everything you have for "imagined" love.......OPEN YOUR EYES..(my favorite expression in Thailand, btw)

[floridarob]

 why am I a "Dangling" member and Tomcal is "aroused" member....just seems wrong, lol

[mvan1]

On 2/9/2017 at 2:20 PM, Tomcal said:

Around 2007 or so he moved into the basement of his sisters house in Kansas City where his elderly parents were. I believe he moved into his own apt several years ago and he is still in KC, you can find him on FB!

 

I just saw this thread from one and one-half years ago.   I recall the person who called himself Trilingual.  

For those who remember him, you might know that he married a Brazilian he had met in a Rio sauna.     

While they were married, Trilingual put the Brazilian through college. 

Upon graduation from college, the Brazilian presented Trilingual with divorce papers.

It was back to Kansas for Trilingual 

 

 

[Tomcal]

He and the Brazilian are still married so that he will get survivor benefits, gov’t pension as Tribid about 75 and the husband is about 35.

[mvan1]

50 minutes ago, Tomcal said:

He and the Brazilian are still married so that he will get survivor benefits, gov’t pension as Tribid about 75 and the husband is about 35.

Several years ago there were Americans discussing Trilingual's separation and departure from Brazil.  The separation was not reported as friendly.    

There were reports about Trilingual losing his Brazil assets to the husband and then moving back to Kansas, never to return to Brazil.  

Are the stories untrue?

[Tomcal]

No the stories are partially true, He did not lose his assets to the BF unless you count taking him to Europe twice and paying for 6 years college all on a govt pension!  bttm line Tri is in “love” and is leaving what he has left to the husband who 15 years ago was a “lean” tall guy..now a close to 38 yr old who is more rotund!

[trencherman]

The last comment of his, I recall reading in a now defunct Brazil gay travel forum, after hearing the story of their separation and his nervous breakdown from a friend (Gingado) who was living in Rio at the time, Trilingual was recommending his boyfriend as an English speaking guide and Portuguese language tutor in Florianapolis or thereabouts where he has then moved back to after uni where he landed a job as math teacher, so it seemed to me that the separation was not at all as brutal or as dramatic as had been reported.

Trilingual was quite the pioneer promoter for Brazilian gay travel and I relied completely on his recommendations about this matter so on my first trip to Brazil, I even offered to buy him dinner which he accepted with that boyfriend in tow along with Eduardo from Buenos Aires who was staying with them for a few days on a visit to Rio.  He was younger than him but not by much and I was not too impressed by his appearance and demeanor, specially with what was available at the saunas at the time and keeping in mind how he gushed over and went on about him in that travel forum.  It could be that he possessed attributes that were not apparent to casual observers.

Later, I ran into Trilingual again and again in my subsequent visits since I stayed at the same apartment he recommended which was in the same city block as his apartment.  He appeared okay.

 

[axiom2001]

17 hours ago, mvan1 said:

 

I just saw this thread from one and one-half years ago.   I recall the person who called himself Trilingual.  

For those who remember him, you might know that he married a Brazilian he had met in a Rio sauna.     

While they were married, Trilingual put the Brazilian through college. 

Upon graduation from college, the Brazilian presented Trilingual with divorce papers.

It was back to Kansas for Trilingual 

 

 

I keenly remember this scenario.  It was quite unfortunate for Tri!  Tri also returned to the States to care for his ailing, aged parents.  He and I had lunch on the famous Plaza in KCMO a few months upon his return.  I was back visiting my relatives.

[Tomcal]

Tri did not move to take care of his aging parents! he moved to the basement of his sisters house because he was broke! because of spending everything on his Brazilian BF!

no one moves to the basement of a home in kansas City after living in SF and Rio unless they are in dire straights! just saying!

[msclelovr]

As usual @Tomcal hits the nail on the head. 

Roberto of Buenos Aires and I were friends. He knew all the details (as Tri considered him a friend, tho Roberto told me they were not) and he was scathing about what he considered to be the folly on Tri’s part. Even before the break-up, he told me the Brazilian had met a German (IIRC) in Rio; the German was enamoured of him and took him on vacation in Europe. 

I know of a similar folly. A retired Army officer went on holiday to Rio and came back with a slim young man (some 25-30 years younger). Installed in a comfortable home in Europe and taken care of, the young man indulged in all the desserts, cake and ice-cream he’d never had as a child. It took less than 2 years for the slim young man to turn into a blob, and that killed the retired older man’s desire for him.

[Tomcal]

i understand why these guys let this happen to them! like everyone they want to be loved! many have never felt that emotion in their lives but...when a “relationship” starts on a cash basis, I never have seen it become love on the $/younger guys part!  The best test i still think is if you want to test if he is really in love with you then tell him:

Older guy/Client “I have lost all my money in the stock market! but at lest we still have each other!”

Garoto:  Gone like the wind! :-)

[trencherman]

17 hours ago, msclelovr said:

As usual @Tomcal hits the nail on the head. 

Roberto of Buenos Aires and I were friends. He knew all the details (as Tri considered him a friend, tho Roberto told me they were not) and he was scathing about what he considered to be the folly on Tri’s part...

Roberto stayed at Trilingual's apartment when he traveled to Rio.  Ceased to be a friend as soon as Trilingual lost everything? That's how it works and that’s about par with common humanity.  The friend who stays with you when you are down and out is rare indeed.  I would be wary of his so called "friendship."

 

[msclelovr]

I take issue with what you wrote @trencherman  ‘de mortuis nihil nisi bonum’

Of course, you may not be aware that Roberto died in a domestic accident a few years ago. He was always a good friend to me - keeping in touch between my visits to Argentina, giving dinner parties for me when I was there, introducing me to his friends etc - and I was happy to reciprocate when he visited Europe. 

AFAIK Roberto did not cease to be a friend when Tri “lost everything” (as you put it). Rather he never considered Tri to be a friend. Tri was merely an acquaintance, and made use of Roberto’s contacts in Buenos Aires. Roberto commented that he never understood Tri and what he did, and he assured me that he had seriously warned Tri about getting involved with the young Brazilian. Roberto related a number of incidents that had convinced him the young man was only there to make use of Tri and, what were to a dirt-poor Brazilian, his economic advantages.

[sydneyboy1]

The other driving force behind the Gay Travel Brazil website was Drey. Does anyone know what happened to him? He was very helpful in answering questions and raising issues for discussion.

 

[axiom2001]

On 9/6/2018 at 5:57 PM, Tomcal said:

Tri did not move to take care of his aging parents! he moved to the basement of his sisters house because he was broke! because of spending everything on his Brazilian BF!

no one moves to the basement of a home in kansas City after living in SF and Rio unless they are in dire straights! just saying!

Tom, I wrote what I wrote because when Trilingual and I had lunch on that sunny afternoon in the Plaza of KCMO, I thought he'd relayed what I'd written.  Perhaps I misheard what he shared, but  I could have been notified in another way:  I'm referring to your second sentence.  I am quite cognizant of all of this.  I'm from the Midwest although I've lived in KC for my first 20 years; it would be difficult for me to move back, for I live 1:45 from SF and had once thought about moving to Rio.  But after some serious thinking-- thought against it, for I have NO support base there in any way!

[ferrar]

It was mentioned here that perhaps a factor in the relationship was the potential for benefitting from Tri's Social Security.  I have no idea if that was in fact the case, but there used to be a five-year US residency requirement for Brazilians to be eligible for Survival Benefits, which may well have been met.   Since October 1, however, that requirement is no longer the case (as I have posted separately),  so a relationship exclusively in Brazil could qualify today.

[Tomcal]

They are both in the U.S.

[sydneyboy1]

I am resurrecting this old thread to discover if there is any up to date information on Trilingual or Drey. I was a frequent contributor to the old Gay Travel Brazil website and still have a great affection for the site and these 2 gents in particular. It was an (almost) indispensable source of information on Gay Brazil. I never had the opportunity to meet them, a source of regret.