2 Years in Saudi Arabia OR How Did I Not Get Beheaded???

[TotallyOz]

It has truly been an interesting two years in Saudi Arabia. Back in 2014, I decided that I wanted to visit Mecca and learn more about the Islamic faith. Not to convert, but to try to understand some of the things in the world a bit better.

The only way to travel to the most secluded country in the world and the center of the Islamic religion is with a business visa or employment visa. When a good company approached me and offers to hired me for 2 years I thought this would be a truly amazing experience. It was a two year contract as typical in Saudi Arabia. They put a lot of money into hiring and getting people to the country. I had to have medical tests and degree attestations, etc. They deny anyone with HIV or any other medical issues. I had a friend that was denied because he had HEP in past and another denied as he had a medical history that showed a previous STD.

When all my paperwork came through, after 4 months of work, I was excited. LOL Needless to say, I did not know what I was getting into.

As an openly gay man, I knew that I could not tell friends and family where I was going as all it would take for me to be beheaded was one person with a vendetta and I’d be in jail. So, I decided to keep this very quite and not tell anyone. I told people I was visiting Dubai or Thailand or Brazil. To all those people, I apologize. But, for me, I knew that my life could be put in jeopardy by telling someone I was in Saudi Arabia.

What did I learn? Well, my goodness. There is so much that I learned and so much that I would have changed had I had the opportunity. I learned that there are good Muslim people that are kind and gentle and nurturing. I also learned that even those people have a hatred of gays. One colleague at work told me one day as we were chatting about her brother that if he were gay, that she wished he would die or never come into their lives. Another colleague told me that Heath Ledger was suicidal because of the scene he did in Brokeback Mountain. Another told me after the massacre in Orlando that it was a good thing that it was a gay club instead of a “normal” place.

All in all, I came to learn about the country and the culture and the people and I did. But, I didn’t like a lot of what I saw.

The malls are the meeting places here. And, yes they close for prayer time 5 times a day. It is illegal to have an open shop during prayer time. So, things open and close. As the heat is very very hot, the malls are busiest at night. One night, I got caught up in a gang fight. It looked like about 20 or so Saudi boys who were 15-19. They were fighting hard inside the mall. No one stopped them. No one interviewed. The security did not do anything but watch. When I asked why, I was told they are Saudi and there is nothing they can do. This is very typical here. If you are Saudi, you can do pretty much what you want and get away with it. I see 13 year old boys driving their mom to the grocery store and the police do nothing. I see 15 years olds doing tricks on motorbikes on the highway at 100 MPH and no one stops them. It is almost like the wild west.

The malls are a bit weird. There are entrances for single men and ones for families. You can’t go in the wrong ones so you need to know where to park. At times, singles are not allowed in the malls. In many stores, it is family only. There are often no benches in the malls and people will sit on the floor in front of a Coach store. As all stores close during prayer time, people just sit on floors or walk around. It is a bit surreal.

I had one guy that was Venezuelan that I had a long term affair with. One night, the moral police came into my apartment and searched it up and down. Stripped both of us naked and talked to us. Looked for porn, contraband, alcohol, etc. Luckily, my computer was on another account or they could have found tons of things that would have put me in jail or even killed me. My friend and I were questioned all night. It was a true ordeal but as a report was given, they had to question and we both knew it was a possibility so we had our story planned out. That was, I was his teacher to learn English better. As he was in college and not a native speaker, this was as good as we could think of. The entire night was embarrassing and also told me that I needed to get the hell out of the place and never return.

I was able to see Mecca and it was beautiful. I went to Mada'in Saleh, which is like Petra in Jordan, and spend a wonderful weekend touring the ruins. The interesting thing about the trip up north was that it was 9 hours from my place and I was with a group of Americans. We were given a police escort the entire way up and back. Why? For our safety. As we were driving through small towns where people might know know we were not harmful to them, each town or district we entered, they changed police cars and the next set of cars met us. This continue the entire way up and back. The police officers were very nice and they truly did look out for us but the question remains as to why they needed to do that. The answer was we were not safe and the year before a group of tourists were beheaded and they did not want this to happen. So, we were given a police escort with flashing lights and sirens for over 1,000 kilometers. Shocking right? Did you ever think our best ally in the Middle East would have such a hatred to the people from America.

One night in Jeddah, a group of us our walking on the street when a car drove by and shouted “Fucking Americans.” They slowed down and pointed at us like a gun. It was a bit crazy but I noticed they were driving an American car. LOL Still, it put a bit of a scare into us.

The people are some of the laziest people on earth. They do not want to work and they are use to being given jobs where they sit and do nothing. That is where expats come in and do all the work and take none of the credit.

One of the things I hated most is the entire culture does not know the word no. When asked a question and you say no, they keep asking. Often 20 or 30 times. In order to stop this, you often need to be rude. I can’t count the number of times I have had to say, “I said no 10 time already. No means fucking no.” They get offended by the use of vulgarity but if that is not done, it goes on for days. Honestly days.

The airport staff were so rude and unorganized. I had trouble leaving the airport every time. Once they booked my luggage to one destination and myself to another. They just don’t care and are not very educated. But, all job preference is given to Saudis. I had friends in the stampede at the airport last year. They have children that were almost crushed. It is the mentality of the region. It is push and push and shove and push no matter what happens. That is the reason there are so many stampedes in this part of the world.

There is a great distain for anyone who is not Saudi. They treat all of them like servants or slaves. They did not treat me that way as I was pretty high up in their society and had rich friends. But, the workers that keep the country running are paid slave wages and their passports are held and they have no rights here. Every employer can forbid their employee from traveling or leaving. A couple of friends of mine from Germany wanted to leave on a holiday and their employer said no and refused to give them an exit / reentry permit. They had to get the German Embassy involved but still in the end, they were told that the Embassy would call their employer but they could not help them get out of the country if their employer refused.

Women are treated horribly. They are all covered to protect their beauty from being seen outside of their family. They have to ask permission to leave their homes and many men have multiple wives. When I ask the women who have lived in the USA and returned here why they come back they all say that it is their holy land.

If you ever thought that a true Muslim would be converted, you are wrong. They pray 5 times a day from sun up until sun down. The entire city shuts down during prayer time. Every house has to be built within hearing distance of the call to prayer. It is blasted on loud speakers 5 times per day. They are all very religious. During Ramadan, no food can be eaten during daylight hours. They use this time to cleanse the body but it is a month long fast that reminds them they are Muslim. It is engrained in their every being and daily life. Even the less conservative are more conservative then anyone I know in USA.

What did I learn? I learned that I never want to be in this country again. I learned that the people are good and kind to your face but if you are not willing to be just like them, they despise you. I learned that even your friends who are Saudi believe they are better than you based on their blood. I learned a lot, but I learned that never in my life will I ever put myself in a situation where I could be beheaded just for being me.

I turned in my notice in January of this year. My company tried to get me to stay. They employed every tactic possible. In the end, they offered me a 3 story villa with all expenses and more than double my current salary. After over 40 meetings with them, my answer was always the same, No Thank You. When they decided that I was definitely not going to stay, they quickly did an about face. They even denied an Exit / Entry during my March vacation time. At the end, they held up my money until the last possible moment and then tried to tell me they would wire it to me after I left. I refused and sat in their lobby for one day. As many people were asking what was going on, I told them. It became embarrassing for them and so they finally paid me. But, the cut the salary from what I was owed and there was nothing I could do about that unless I wanted to stay another few weeks or so and fight it. I did not. I was willing to leave without any money. They then held my exit permit until just hours before my flight. Having a car going to the airport without knowing if I would be able to leave was a nightmare. I was on the phone with my embassy and they were on the phone with my employers. The embassy can only request and nothing can be done unless the employer releases you. This I did not know before I went.

They held up my exit visa for 5 days. This was intentional on their part. Just a way to mess with people’s minds. They want to exert power and they really don’t care about anyone who chooses to leave the country and so they do as little as possible. I had to cancel a flight, cancel a taxi, repack all my bags as I was leaving on a Thursday and they did not get my visa for another 5 days. They were supposed to do it on the next working day and my HR guy sent someone to the wrong location. I am lucky to get out even late, as I have friends that were held up in the country for months. Yes, months without any support or assistance. The place is the most insane place I have ever been and it is the one place in the world that I would never return!

Let me say that I don't think all Arab people are like Saudi's.  I don't think all Muslims are like the ones I met.  Radicalism in any form is horrible.  I had great sex and great fun in Istanbul and more hookups than anywhere outside of Asia.  I loved the the city and the people. 

Needless to say, once I got on the plane, I never looked back. I have no desire to ever go to the country again. I have no desire to ever be put in such a horrible situation again.

Would I ever recommend anyone visit this country? No. Would I ever recommend that anyone ever take a job in this country even if for a great deal of money? No. Would I ever recommend that anyone hire someone that was born and raised in this country? No. Am I glad I came to this place? No. Would I do it over again if given the chance? Hell, No.

My entire life has been traveling. On this 2 year adventure, I was able to go to Turkey, UAE, Jordan, Syria, Bahrain, and Lebanon. I was not able to visit Israel because if you have that stamp in your passport, they won’t let you back in Saudi. And, they don’t even recognize the country. All maps in this country have the land of Israel belonging to Lebanon and Palestine. You are forbidden to talk about the country. You are forbidden to talk about Jewish people or read books about Jewish people. It is insane.

Pigs are also dirty and forbidden. You can discuss them but it has to be in a negative way. For example, in Animal Farm, you would have to say, “that dirty pig” or “that nasty pig. Yes, I am serious.

It is interesting that of the 16 of us leaving from the company I worked for, not one of them was sad to leave. Most places you live or stay long periods of time, you miss or have some sad feelings when you go. I did not. Not one of my friends were sad. In fact, it was the opposite, everyone was thrilled to get out of the country and all said they would never return.

This brings my total countries visited to 79. I have yet to decide if I ever want to visit another new country as this place leaves such a bad taste in my mouth. For now, I am headed to Thailand for a VERY VERY long extended holiday. I am not sure I’ll ever leave Asia again. I wanted to visit 100 countries in total. But, after this crappy experience, I am not sure that I’ll visit anywhere new. I certainly have no desire to visit anywhere in the Middle East or Africa. I have had my fill of that part of the world.

[flguy]

Wow, this is really eye opening especially in light of the events of the last few weeks.  Was anything ever said in regard to Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton?

[TotallyOz]

They all hate Donald Trump. He is an ass but the rest of the world hates him as well.

[RA1]

Sorry, but sounds very stereotypical to me.

Best regards,

RA1

 

[BigK]

What an experience!  Glad you're back "home" OZ.

[TotallyOz]

On 6/23/2016 at 6:11 AM, RA1 said:

Sorry, but sounds very stereotypical to me.

Best regards,

RA1

 

Which part?  LOL

Just now, BigK said:

What an experience!  Glad you're back "home" OZ.

Thanks BigK.  I appreciate that !

[BigK]

2 minutes ago, TotallyOz said:

Which part?  LOL

Thanks BigK.  I appreciate that !

I should have added in one piece!

[TotallyOz]

1 minute ago, BigK said:

I should have added in one piece!

My niece and nephew were going to start a "Save Unkie" movement if I had been condemned to be beheaded.

[marcanthony]

glad to have you home in one piece!  (head attached to body)

[TotallyOz]

2 hours ago, marcanthony said:

glad to have you home in one piece!  (head attached to body)

Thanks!

[numerito]

Welcome back, Oz. What a crazy idea you had! Glad you made it home safely. And now, please take care of yourself. 

[TotallyOz]

13 hours ago, numerito said:

Welcome back, Oz. What a crazy idea you had! Glad you made it home safely. And now, please take care of yourself. 

Thank you my friend!  I will. I've landed in Thailand and have 2 beautiful boys taking care of me night and day.

[lookin]

Never one to lose his head, Oz sneaks his Venezuelan boy toy back to the apartment

[boiworship]

What a dystopia.

[AdamSmith]

On 6/25/2016 at 2:20 AM, marcanthony said:

glad to have you home in one piece!  (head attached to body)

+10,000!!!

Oz, you crazy nutbag!

This is the only case I can think of where one Oz is definitively better than two!

And here I had thought your wanting to drive your own tuk-tuk around Bangkok was the height of insanity.

[TotallyOz]

9 hours ago, AdamSmith said:

Oz, you crazy nutbag!

LOL  You are right there!

And, the Tuk Tuk Adventure is coming soon to a theater near you.

[Lucky]

This is truly one of the most fascinating posts in recent history. I liked reading it, but sure wouldn't have wanted to share the experience.Thanks for posting it, Oz.

[TotallyOz]

2 hours ago, Lucky said:

This is truly one of the most fascinating posts in recent history. I liked reading it, but sure wouldn't have wanted to share the experience.Thanks for posting it, Oz.

Thank you Lucky.  It is good to see you!  You were missed!

[Lucky]

Thanks, Oz. I am glad that you didn't get beheaded! You'da been missed!

[caeron]

I'm glad you got out safe.

I would never, ever, ever work in Saudi Arabia. Even the smallest amount of research will show what a hellhole it is.