Listen up Cameron, the Queen doesn't 'purr'

[AdamSmith]

Listen up Cameron, the Queen doesn't 'purr'

By Hannah Betts

1:51PM BST 24 Sep 2014

The Telegraph

Despite not being on intimate terms with the fellow, I can tell you how David Cameron awoke this morning. For 30 blissful seconds there was merely a contented blur. Next, he remembered his recent coup in Jocklandia and a beam began to spread. Then: "Gaaaaah! PURR-gate!" There is no way that second 33 did not have D-Cam feeling like the world's biggest banana, because, in saying that Her Majesty purred over the referendum result, that is what he is.

Let's get this straight: the Queen does not purr. She may steer, suggest, propose, decree; she may hear, elicit, lend perspective and bring calm. She may even, in the satirist's fantasy, emit an excited falsetto squawk when presented with a perfectly prepared gin and tonic, or rather nice horse. She does not, however - emphatically not - purr. And it should be off with his head at the very idea.

There are purring women, of course, and purring is their prowess: that ravishing resonance occurring somewhere between the mellifluous and the gravelly - think contemporary pussycats Eartha Kitt, Fennella Fielding, Joanna Lumley and Mariella Frostrup.

Marilyn Monroe was pure purr, a woman who transformed her voice into a musical instrument --uniquely dulcet, yet pulsating, dripping in charm --and a force in no way secondary to that tremulous, blancmangey body.

Anna Chancellor is a woman with a purr in her, in a way that makes her incarnation in the public imagination as Four Weddings and a Funeral's Duckface nothing short of a travesty. Joan Collins is in possession of a purr promising a growl.

Baroness Thatcher - like forebear Elizabeth I - could purr with the best of them -- the iron fist in the velvet purr, as politic and deadly as Helen of Sparta. Lilith, Eve, Nefertiti, Cleopatra, Mata Hari (all honeytraps, in fact) - one knows that, to a woman, they were purrers all.

My own finest purr came when, talking to a lover in a moment of exquisite intimacy, he swooned: "Tell me again in the beautiful voice." Reader, I felt obliged.

One pities the non-purrer. Without this weapon in their arsenal, how do such specimens survive?

A few, Her Majesty, not least, are simply above it -- their power lying not in manipulation, but in fact. Mr Cameron can reassure himself: his weekly meeting with Her Majesty is going to make this morning's awakening angst look like a walk in the (royal) park.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/politics/11118748/Listen-up-Cameron-the-Queen-doesnt-purr.html

[RA1]

The Queen certainly does not purr. Those other mentioned gals certainly did. However, one must remember that even the pussycat with the loveliest purr can still have claws.

Best regards,

RA1

[lookin]

Pussy cat, pussy cat, where have you been?

I've been to London to look at the Queen.

Pussy cat, pussy cat, did Her Majesty purr?

Decidedly not, and her mouse pulled my fur.