Fart Filtering Underwear

[AdamSmith]

https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7604755200/hBA697C19/

[Suckrates]

[AdamSmith]

Back to first principles, courtesy urbandictionary.com...

shit

1. One of the most popular swear/cuss/curse words/profanities
2. another word Feces. Poop. Dookie. Scheisse. Poo Poo. Brownies.

The Shit List:

The Ghost Shit
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit on the toilet paper, but there's no shit in the bowl.

The Clean Shit
The kind where you feel shit come out, see shit in the bowl, but there's no shit on the toilet paper.

The Wet Shit
You wipe your ass fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you end up putting toilet paper between your ass and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

The Second Wave Shit
This shit happens when you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to shit some more.

The Brain Hemorrahage Through Your Nose Shit
Also known as "Pop a Vein in Your Forehead Shit". You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.

The Corn Shit
No explanation necessary.

The Lincoln Log Shit
The kind of shit that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.

The Nororius Drinker Shit
The kind of shit you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread mark left on the bottom of the toilet bowl after you flush.

The "Gee, I Really Wish I Could Shit" Shit
The kind where you want to shit, but even after straining your guts out, all you can do is sit on the toilet, cramped and farting.

The Wet Cheeks Shit
Also known as the "Power Dump". That's the kind that comes out of your ass so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.

The Liquid Shit
That's the kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your butt, splashes all over the side of the toilet bowl and, at the same time, chronically burns your tender poop-chute.

The Mexican Food Shit
A class all on its own.

The Crowd Pleaser
This shit is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you have to show it to someone before flushing.

The Mood Enhancer
This shit occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, thereby allowing you to be your old self again.

The Ritual
This shit occurs at the same time each day and is accomplished with the aid of a newspaper.

The Guinness Book Of Records Shit
A shit so noteworthy it should be recorded for future generations.

The Aftershock Shit
This shit has an odour so powerful than anyone entering the vicinity within the next seven hours is affected.

The "Honeymoon's Over" Shit
This is any shit created in the presence of another person.

The Groaner
A shit so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance.

The Floater
Characterized by its floatability, this shit has been known to resurface after many flushings.

The Ranger
A shit which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper.

The Phantom Shit
This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit to putting it there.

The Peek-A-Boo Shit
Now you see it, now you don't. This shit is playing games with you. Requires patience and muscle control.

The Bombshell
A shit that comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either inappropriate to shit (i.e. during lovemaking or a root canal) or you are nowhere near shitting facilities.

The Snake Charmer
A long skinny shit which has managed to coil itself into a frightening position - usually harmless.

The Olympic Shit
This shit occurs exactly one hour prior to the start of any competitive event in which you are entered and bears a close resemblance to the Drinker's Shit.

The Back-To-Nature Shit
This shit may be of any variety but is always deposited either in the woods or while hiding behind the passenger side of your car.

The Pebbles-From-Heaven Shit
An adorable collection of small turds in a cluster, often a gift from God when you actually can't shit.

Premeditated Shit
Laxative induced. Doesn't count.

Shitzopherenia
Fear of shitting - can be fatal!

Energizer Vs. Duracell Shit
Also known as a "Still Going" shit.

The Power Dump Shit
The kind that comes out so fast, you barely get your pants down when you're done.

The Liquid Plumber Shit
This kind of shit is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor. (You should have followed the advice from the Lincoln Log Shit.)

The Spinal Tap Shit
The kind of shit that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got to be coming out sideways.

The "I Think I'm Giving Birth Through My Asshole" Shit
Similar to the Lincoln Log and The Spinal Tap Shits. The shape and size of the turd resembles a tall boy beer can. Vacuous air space remains in the rectum for some time afterwards.

The Porridge Shit
The type that comes out like toothpaste, and just keeps on coming. You have two choices: a) flush and keep going, or risk it piling up to your butt while you sit there helpless.

The "I'm Going To Chew My Food Better" Shit
When the bag of Doritos you ate last night lacerates the insides of your rectum on the way out in the morning.

The "I Think I'm Turning Into A Bunny" Shit
When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splashing sounds when they hit the water.

The "What The Hell Died In Here?" Shit
Also sometimes referred to as "The Toxic Dump". Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odour. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.

The "I Just Know There's A Turd Still Dangling There" Shit
Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on to drop off because if you wipe now, it's going to smear all over the place.

"AW SHIT"

"I have to take a shit"

http://www.urbandictionary.com/thesaurus.php?term=fart

[MsGuy]

AdamSmith, you have outdone yourself with this one.

Clearly a 1st ballot Hall of Infamy post.

(5 to 2 odds that even Lucky got a giggle out of this one.)

[AdamSmith]

Too kind!

I must reiterate credit to http://www.urbandictionary.com, the veritable Beavis & Butthead of the online lexicographical world.

[AdamSmith]

So don't blame me -- this was CNN's headline!

Why the Earth is farting

By Alan Weisman

updated 7:58 AM EDT, Tue August 12, 2014

A crater in the Yamal Peninsula, in Yamalo-Nenets Autonomous Okrug, Russia.

STORY HIGHLIGHTS

• Recently, three mysterious craters were discovered in the Siberian permafrost
• Alan Weisman: Hot summers caused Earth to spew methane, resulting in explosions
• He says airborne methane is more potent in producing greenhouse effect
• Weisman: Such stunning global flatulence is deadly if we don't embrace green energy

Editor's note: Alan Weisman is the author of "Countdown: Our Last, Best Hope for a Future on Earth?" (Little, Brown and Co). He is also the author of "The World Without Us," a 2007 New York Times and international best-seller translated into 34 languages.

(CNN) -- Every day, you have a close personal encounter with methane, a key ingredient of something we don't usually mention in polite company: farts.

Perhaps that's why methane is also called "natural gas." Unfortunately, neither propriety nor intestinal discipline can suppress its unpleasantness lately, because now not just us, but the Earth itself is farting.

Recently, three new craters, one of which measured approximately 100 feet wide and over 200 feet deep, were discovered in the Siberian permafrost. The explanation for them is even more alarming than asteroid strikes: Apparently, after two consecutive summers averaging 5 degrees Celsius hotter than normal, frozen methane is not merely thawing, it's exploding. Scientists fear that, like chronic bad digestion, this phenomenon could be ongoing. Methane in the air surrounding these craters already measures 53,000 times the normal concentration.

Alan Weisman

Then, just a week into a research trip, a team from Stockholm University found "vast methane plumes" shooting from the sea floor off the Siberian coast. Columns of gas bubbles, they reported, were surfacing around their icebreaker in waters saturated with 10 to 50 times more methane than usual.

This was the marine equivalent of melting permafrost, the undoing of frozen crystals called methane hydrates, locked solid for millennia by the pressure and temperature of deep oceans.

The U.S. Office of Naval Research calculates that methane hydrates hold trillions of tons of hydrocarbons, from two to 10 times the amount as all conventional deposits of fossil fuels, but they're probably too costly or unsafe to harvest. Now, as ocean temperatures rise, they've begun collapsing, spewing as much gas skyward as the thawing tundra.

Mysterious crater baffles scientists

Airborne methane produces 86 times the heat-trapping greenhouse effect of carbon dioxide. Although CO2 remains in the atmosphere far longer, after 100 years methane is still 30 times more potent. With sea level increases from 3 to 6 feet already predicted by the century's end, such stunning global flatulence isn't merely embarrassing, but devastating for civilization.

So what do we do? First, we recognize that the reason this is happening involves a misleading term: positive feedback loop. It's misleading because for us there's nothing positive about it. It means that as temperatures rise, warming land and seas fart (belch, if you prefer) more methane -- which then warms things further, so dangerous eruptions accelerate. Feeding back on itself, warming begets more warming.

Second, we admit that this loop began with us. By now, the link between fuel that jet-propels our industrialized civilization and excess CO2 and methane in the atmosphere is challenged only by those who profit obscenely from it.

Third, we stop compounding the problem by ceasing to pretend that energy derived by shattering our bedrock to squeeze even more natural gas from it is somehow "clean." Not only does burning methane crank planetary heat higher, but fracking wells also inevitably leak. At least 2% of their methane output, the EPA conservatively estimates, seeps into the atmosphere, thickening the gas layer that's already turning Earth into a hothouse.

Nor will the other 98% go to heat our homes. Enormous pipelines are now proposed to transport fracked methane through New England's conservation lands and orchards, through northern Minnesota's prime tourism and wild rice lake districts, and across the Ogallala Aquifer-fed farms of our nation's heartland. Each will terminate at a port, where its gas will be exported, not used domestically.

What will remain is scarred land and the methane that escapes or explodes (most recently on June 26, in East Bernard, Texas, into 150-foot flames). Such pipelines will be subsidized by rate-payers, not by vastly wealthy corporations that own them -- unless we refuse to let them be built, and instead commit our energy funding henceforth to truly cleaner options, like wind and solar.

The last time there was this much atmospheric CO2 was 3 million years ago, when seas were 80 to 100 feet higher. Since the Industrial Revolution, atmospheric methane has more than doubled, and the amount now gushing from the seas alone is 34 times what we thought just seven years ago.

Until we stop putting more carbon dioxide and methane overhead, prepare for more rude farts to foul your air, and our future. With coastal cities, fertile deltas and much of the world's rice crops threatened by floods or salination from encroaching seas -- and with grain harvests predicted to fall 10% for each added 1 degree C of average temperature -- passing greenhouse gases isn't merely vulgar -- it's deadly.

http://www.cnn.com/2014/08/12/opinion/weisman-craters-methane/index.html?hpt=hp_t3

[RA1]

Somebody find that cow and stop her. Is there such a product as Cow Beano?

Best regards,

RA1

[AdamSmith]

The Word ‘Fart' And Its Puzzling Heritage

| Posted: 07/31/2012 8:16 am EDT | Updated: 07/29/2013 9:05 am EDT

Follow:

Video, Break Wind Etymology, Etymology, Fart Etymology, History Of Fart, Story Of The Word Fart, Word Fart, Books News

From the OUP Blog, by Anatoly Liberman

Fart looks like a product of our time, but it has existed since time immemorial. Even the nuances have not been lost: one thing is to break wind loudly (farting); quite a different thing is to do it quietly (the now obscure “fisting”). (This fist has nothing to do with fist “clenched fingers” and consequently isn’t related to fisting, a sexual activity requiring, as we are warned, great caution and a lot of tender experience. This reminds me of the instruction Sergei Prokofiev gave to his First Piano Concerto: “Col pugno,” that is ‘with a fist’.)

Both words for the emission of wind (fart and fist) were current in the Old Germanic languages. Frata and físa (the accent over the vowel designates its length, not stress) turned up even in Old Icelandic mythological poems. According to a popular tale, the great god Thor was duped by a giant and spent a night in a mitten, which he took for a house. He was so frightened, as his adversary put it, that he dared neither sneeze nor “fist.” In another poem, the goddess Freyja, notorious for her amatory escapades, was found in bed with her brother and farted (apparently shocked by the discovery).

The words were as vulgar then as they are today. Yet even grammar proves their antiquity. Some verbs (they are called strong) form their principal parts by changing the root vowel, for instance, write/wrote/written, sing/sang/sung. Others (they are called weak) add a dental suffix (d or t) in the preterit and the past participle, for example, beg/begged/begged, look/looked/looked, wait/waited/waited.

Strong verbs belong to the most ancient part of the Germanic vocabulary. Fart was one of them; however, it occurred in several forms. Modern German has retained farzen (now a weak verb, though furzen is the most common form) and Furz (a noun). In the older period, German also had furzen and ferzan. Engl. fart goes back to ferten, an exact congener of ferzan. Although it was recorded only in the verbal noun ferting, its existence can be taken for granted. I assume that the group er in it changed to ar in the same way in which person yielded its doublet parson and clerk became Clark (in British English, clerk and Clark are homophones).

Icelandic freta and frata were the product of metathesis, that is, the vowel and the consonant r switched places in them. Freta remained a strong verb, but frata became weak. Fortunately, our frat boys seldom if ever take Old Icelandic and are spared the embarrassment. On the other hand, they might enjoy the double entendre.

Although part of the oldest stock, the verb for breaking wind was “popular,” even “low,” and this may have been the reason its shape varied so widely. Compare even such more dignified but “common” names as scrimmage and scrummage, mentioned in the June “gleanings,” part 2, and the names recorded for a wagon or cart: lorry, lurry, rolly, and rully, all meaning “trolley.”

An even more surprising thing is that fart is not only ancient Germanic but Common Indo-European. It has cognates from Lithuanian to Sanskrit and Greek, but naturally they begin with p and have d after r (compare Sanskrit pard-, Russian perdet’ with stress on the second syllable, and so forth) because according to a well-known law, Germanic consonants underwent a shift and that is why Latin pater and duo correspond to Engl. father and two.

The history of fist (to break wind quietly) is similar to that of fart. Vowels in this verb also varied, as evidenced by the Dutch noun veest “fisting”, with ee (pronounced like e in Engl. vest but prolonged!) from ai. Icelandic físa preserved the oldest form, without the suffix t appended to the root. It too has excellent cognates.

Apparently, alongside Indo-European perd-, the near synonymous root pezd- existed (another instance of variation!). It must have been current in Proto-Latin. The sought-for cognate in that language is pedo, with long e (its length is a “compensation” for the loss of z).

The amazing thing is that the cognates are such a perfect match. For example, Russian bzdet’, as well as its Lithuanian congener, are exact glosses of German fisten and Icelandic físa, namely “break wind without making a noise.” Seeing how broad the range of meanings among cognates usually is, one can only wonder at absolute precision in such a word. In Old French, the reflex of ped- was pet-; hence petard.

If perd- and pezd- arose as variants of the same root, fart and fist are ultimately related and sound imitative, even though in the world of onomatopoeia relatedness is a rather vacuous concept. It may seem that perd and pezd do not render the sound of breaking wind.

However, pezd- is rather obviously related to several verbs for whistling and hissing. It appears that everything began with pezd (quiet fisting), which developed into perd, that is, the sound increased in volume (from z to r). At least one eminent language historian set up the ancient root perzd- and allowed the recorded forms to have lost either r or z, but this is a self-serving reconstruction. Such is the tentative history of Indo-European farting, and only one addition is in order here. In Indo-European, many words have variants with and without s- at the beginning. If Latin spiro “blow” (as in Engl. inspire) is one of them (s-piro), it may be allied to the Germanic F-words discussed above.

Those interested in the subject and not only in words may want to read the book by Valerie Allen On Farting: Language and Laughter in the Middle Ages (Palgrave 2007), but should skip the short section on etymology with its erroneous conclusion.

Scatological words are always embarrassing to discuss. But linguists are like doctors: desensitizing makes them indifferent to many things that excite others. In the office they are professionals, and words are just words to them. Other than that, they are normal people.

Read more on the OUP Blog.

Anatoly Liberman is the author of Word Origins…And How We Know Them as well as An Analytic Dictionary of English Etymology: An Introduction. His column on word origins, The Oxford Etymologist, appears on the OUP blog, each Wednesday. Send your etymology question to him care of blog@oup.com; he’ll do his best to avoid responding with “origin unknown.”

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/30/the-word-fart-origins-etymology_n_1721585.html

[Lucky]

A gift for Adam Smith: http://xxxibsdrgn8.tumblr.com/

[AdamSmith]

A gift for Adam Smith: http://xxxibsdrgn8.tumblr.com/

Thank you!

No poop that I could find, the title notwithstanding, but many cute Koreans.

[Lucky]

Thank you!

No poop that I could find, the title notwithstanding, but many cute Koreans.

I'm working on it.

[Lucky]

Still working on it...

[Lucky]

Almost there...are you ready for it?

[AdamSmith]

HAH! The verisimilitude is great.

Assuming that's all it is.

[Lucky]

This is it!!! That's all there is...

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

Get Revenge with the Liquid Ass Spray

Did someone fart? What's that smell?! Ewwww, did you just poop your pants?! If you want to have this kind of reactions from your loved ones, friends, colleagues, or even the crowd, then you need to get this amazing Liquid Ass Spray! It is a highly concentrated liquid ass spray that smells like a mixture of green poo, bad smelling moist butt crack, fart, and dead animals. Yes, everything you have just read is gross but that is the point to this prank anyway, to gross your victim out and embarrass him in front of people! The best part about all this is that this spray is the perfect solution to mortify your enemy in a very discreet manner.

All you have to do is just spray a little on a small space or area such as in an office cubicle, elevator, car, bathroom, or anywhere for that matter and you will totally send everybody running out from the stinking zone! This spray is that powerful and no one will never know that you did it. So if you want to seek revenge, then this is an effective and definitely an unforgettable way to make your victim be remembered as that someone who farted that stank like a dead animal!

http://www.prankplace.com/Liquid-Ass-Spray-6909-0X.aspx

[AdamSmith]

Tex–ASS! At first, it smells like a caterer has just walked through with a dozen BBQ rib platters. After 10-15 minutes, the BBQ smell begins to dissipate and the ol' familiar ASS stink starts to take over.

http://www.prankplace.com/Tex-Ass-Spray-LIQ252-0X.aspx

[AdamSmith]

Need a prank big enough to clear a whole room? You need the Fart Bomb! The Fart Bomb is simple and completely anonymous. Just enter a crowded room of people, squeeze the Fart Bomb, drop it and leave. In 8 to 15 seconds, the packet will pop releasing the most horrid stench you've ever smelt. Then laugh and watch as everyone runs for fresh air wondering "who dropped the bomb." They're perfect for livening up (or ruining) any social gathering. Each box contains 6 lethal doses.

http://www.prankplace.com/Fart-Bomb--Single-Packet-14440-0X.aspx

[AdamSmith]

You've tricked your little sister countless times with every farting prank in the book, but she'll never suspect this one! Our sneaky fart powder can be mixed with any hot food or drink and is left completely undetected by the victims like your little sister…until she chows down on the fart powdered meal! It will make her have cosmic farting!

http://www.prankplace.com/Fart-Powder-4014-0X.aspx

[AdamSmith]

It may look like delicious candy, but it will leave a bad taste - in your BUTT! These silly candies will leave you farting uncontrollably! Great gag for your uppity in-laws!

http://www.prankplace.com/Fart-Candy-Pranks-1993-0X.aspx

[AdamSmith]

Specially for MsGuy!

(And hito!)

http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2011/12/6/1323186516869/Childrens-Picture-Books---012.jpg

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

fart

1. 1-man salute

2. 7.4 on the Rectum scale

3. Acid-rain maker

4. After the thunder comes the rain

5. Air bagel

6. Airbrush your boxers

7. Anal acoustics

8. Anal ahem

9. Anal audio

10. Anal salute

11. Anal volcano

12. Arse blast

13. Ass blaster

14. Ass-scented methane

15. Ass biscuit

16. Ass thunder

17. Ass whistle

18. A turd whistling for the right of way

19. Backdoor breeze

20. Backfire

21. Bad sprinkling

22. Baking brownies

23. Barking spiders

24. Bean blower

25. Beep your horn

26. Belch from behind

27. Better open a window

28. Blast off

29. Blast the chair

30. Blasting the ass trumpet

31. Blat

32. Blow ass

33. Blow mud

34. Blow the big brown horn

35. Blowing the butt bugle

36. Blowing you a kiss

37. Bomber

38. Bottom blast

39. Bottom burp

40. Break the sound barrier without a plane

41. Break wind

42. Breath of fresh air

43. Brown horn brass choir

44. Brown thunder

45. Bun shaker

46. Burnin' rubber

47. Buster

48. Busting ass

49. Butt bleat

50. Butt burp

51. Butt hair harmony

52. Butt percussion

53. Butt trauma

54. Butt trumpet

55. Butt tuba

56. Buttock bassoon

57. Cheek flapper

58. Cheesin'

59. Colonic calliope

60. Crack a rat

61. Crack one off

62. Crack splitters

63. Crimp off some breakfast biscuits

64. Crop dusting (surreptitiously farting while passing thru a cube farm, then enjoying the sounds of dismay and disgust)

65. Crowd splitter

66. Cut a stinker

67. Cut loose

68. Cut the cheese

69. Cut the wind

70. Death Breath

71. Deflate

72. Doing the one-cheek sneak

73. Doorknob

74. Drop a barking spider

75. Drop a bomb

76. Drop ass

77. Dropped a bomb

78. Eggy

79. Empty my tank

80. Exercising the meat nozzle (not sure if this one doesn't belong in a different category)

81. Exploding bottom

82. Explosion between the legs

83. Exterminate

84. Fart

85. Fire a stink torpedo

86. Fire the retro-rocket

87. Firing scud missiles

88. Fizzler

89. Flame thrower

90. Flamer

91. Flapper

92. Flatulate

93. Flatulence

94. Flatus

95. Flipper

96. Float an air biscuit

97. Floof

98. Fluffy

99. Fog slicer

100. Fowl howl

101. Fragrant fuzzy

102. Free-floating anal vapors

103. Free Jacuzi

104. Freep

105. Frequency Actuated Rectal Tremor

106. Fumigate

107. Funky rollers

108. Gas attack

109. Gas blaster

110. Gas from the ass

111. Gas master

112. Gaseous intestinal by-products

113. Ghost turd

114. Give a dirty look at the person next to you

115. Grandpa

116. Gravy pants

117. Great brown cloud

118. Hailing Emperor Crush

119. Hey, did you fart? Because you blew me away! (pick-up line)

120. Heinus anus

121. Hole flappage

122. Hole flapper

123. Honk

124. HUMrrhoids

125. Hydrogen bomb

126. I made a pootie

127. If you are that embarrassed about it, you can always blame it on me.

128. Ignition

129. Insane in the methane

130. Invert a burp

131. It's low tide

132. Jet propulsion

133. Jockey burner

134. Jumping guts

135. Just calling your name

136. Just keeping warm

137. Just the noise

138. Kaboom

139. K-Fart

140. Kill the canary

141. Lay a wind loaf

142. Lay an air biscuit

143. Leave a gas trap

144. Let a beefer

145. Let each little bean be heard

146. Let one fly

147. Let one go

148. Let the beans out

149. Lethal cloud

150. Letting one rip

151. Lingerer

152. Made a gas blast

153. Make a stink

154. Make a trumpet of one's ass (John Milton)

155. Mating call of the barking spider

156. Methane Bomb

157. Methane production experiment

158. Moon gas

159. Mud duck

160. Must be a sewer around

161. Nose death

162. Odor bubble

163. Odorama

164. One man jazz band

165. One-gun salute

166. Painting the elevator

167. Pant stainer

168. Panty burp

169. Parp

170. Party in your pants

171. Pass gas

172. Pass wind

173. Play the tuba

174. Playing the trouser tuba

175. Plotcher (aka a wet one ... bad form, points taken off for emmitting one of these)

176. Poof

177. Poop gas

178. Poot

179. Pop

180. Pop a fluffy

181. Preventing Spontaneous Human Combustion (South Park)

182. Prove it

183. Prupe (Norwegian--the E has two dots over it)

184. Puff, the Magic Dragon

185. Quack

186. Rebuild the ozone layer one poof at a time

187. Rectal honk

188. Rectal shout

189. Rectal tremor

190. Release a squeeker

191. Release an ass buscuit

192. Release gas

193. Rep

194. Rimshot

195. Rip ass

196. Rip one

197. Ripple fart

198. Roast the Jockeys

199. Rotting vegetation

200. Safety

201. Salute your shorts

202. SAS (silent and scentless)

203. SBD (silent but deadly)

204. Set off an SBD

205. Shit fumes

206. Shit honker

207. Shit vapor

208. Shoot the cannon

209. Shoppin' at Wal-Fart

210. Silent but deadly (SBD)

211. Singe the carpet

212. Singing the Anal Anthem

213. Skunk smells his own smell first!

214. Sounding the sphincter scale

215. Sounds like a barking spider

216. Sounds like a wompus cat

217. Sphincter song

218. Spit a brick

219. Squeak one out

220. Squeeker

221. Steamer

222. Step on a duck

223. Step on a frog

224. Stink bomb

225. Stink Burger

226. Strangling the stank monkey

227. Stress release

228. Tail wind

229. Telegraph from Ft. A-hole to Cmdr. Nostril announcing the arrival of Gen. Shat

230. That felt good

231. The closest you get to craping while standing up

232. The colonic calliope

233. The dog did it

234. The F bomb

235. The gluteal tuba

236. The Sound and the Fury

237. The stink's gone into the fabric

238. The third state of matter

239. The toothless one speaks

240. Thunder pants

241. Thunderspray

242. Toilet tune

243. Toot

244. Toot your own horn

245. Trelblow

246. Triple flutter blast

247. Trouser cough

248. Trouser trumpet

249. Turd honking

250. Turd hooties

251. Turn on the A/C in your large intestine

252. Uncorked symphony

253. Under burp

254. Venting one

255. Wet one

256. What smell?

257. What the dog did

258. Whoever smelt it dealt it

259. Wrong way burping

260. Your voice has changed, but your breath is still the same.

261. Zinger

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=fart