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Sarah Palin Claims Jesus Celebrated Easter

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Sarah Palin Claims Jesus Celebrated Easter

The Daily Currant
Oct 23, 2013

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Sarah Palin claimed today that Jesus Christ celebrated Easter during his time on Earth.

In an interview with Fox and Friends this morning, the former Alaska governor promoted her new book about the left's "war on Christmas" and argued that all Christian holidays should return to the traditional versions practiced by Jesus.

"It makes me so gosh darn angry," Palin explained. "The liberal left in this country has targeted Christian holidays and is trying to secularize them right out of existence.

"When Jesus celebrated Easter with his disciples there were no Easter bunnies or egg hunts. There were no Easter sales at department stores or parades in the street. Easter was a special time of prayer and Christian activism.

"Jesus would gather all the townspeople around and would listen to their stories about the meaning of Easter in their lives. Then he would teach them how to love one another, how to protest Roman abortion clinics and how to properly convert homosexuals.

"You can't even do things like that these days without getting called out by some wacko left-wing human rights group. Christians had more freedom under Roman rule than we do now in our own country! We need to return Easter back to the way it was when Jesus was alive."

Gospel of Palin

Easter is a Christian holiday celebrating the resurrection of Jesus Christ on the third day after he was crucified by the Romans in the 1st century A.D. It is the most important holiday for Eastern and Orthodox Christians, and also has great significance in the West.

Because Easter is a celebration of Jesus's resurrection from the dead, it is highly unlikely that he celebrated the holiday before his death. Its first recorded instance is sometime in the mid-2nd century. This seemingly obvious fact was not lost on the Fox and Friends team, who instantly challenged Palin's assertions.

"Sarah, you know that we love you," started co-host Brian Kilmeade. "I can understand if you think Christian holidays have become too secular and you want to return to the days of the early church. But you have to know that Jesus never celebrated Easter right? I mean you have to know that. What do you think Easter celebrates?"

"Well, Brian, Easter celebrates, you know, sticking it to all the liberal lefties out there who want to be taking our guns and our freedom," Palin responded. "It celebrates the rights of the unborn and the right to religious freedom, to not have government come in and tell you who to believe in and who not to ..."

"It celebrates the death and resurrection of Jesus," Kilmeade interrupted. "It celebrates his death and resurrection from the dead. Now Sarah, tell me how can Jesus celebrate his own death before he died?"

Palin stared blankly into the screen for about 15 seconds, before co-host Elisabeth Hasselbeck cut to commercial.

http://dailycurrant.com/2013/10/23/sarah-palin-claims-jesus-celebrated-easter/

P.S. Under the facebook post where I found the above, a friend commented: "To be fair, every time Jesus celebrated Easter, he would preface the service with the words, 'spoiler alert.'" :lol:

Obamacare Website Accidentally Enrolls Thousands in Sex Offender Registry

The Daily Currant
Oct 21, 2013

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The federal health care exchange at Heathcare.gov has accidentally enrolled thousands of applicants in the government's sex offender registry, the latest of many technical failures to hit the troubled site.

According to several senior officials, since the exchange went live on Oct. 1 around 40,000 individuals looking to buy insurance have instead been listed on the National Sex Offender Public Website (NSOPW), a searchable database of rapists, molesters and others convicted of sex crimes.

The mix up was first discovered by people searching for sex offenders in their neighborhoods, only to find their own names. Administrators are uncertain how such an error occurred, but they note that both websites were built by the same contractor, CGI Federal.

In a statement, Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius acknowledged the problem, but sought to assure the American public that it would be resolved eventually.

"Unfortunately due to a technical issue, a number of people applying for health insurance are now mistakenly listed in our national sex offender registry," the statement reads. "We deeply regret this error and hope to fix it as soon as possible.

"Due to the extreme volume of traffic this site is currently experiencing, however, it may be several months or years before we are able to erase these names from the list. Please accept our apology."

Atlantic Ire

The Healthcare Exchange Marketplaces serve as the cornerstones of President Obama's Affordable Care Act, popularly known as Obamacare. By allowing consumers to easily compare health insurance plans, they hope to facilitate the vast expansion of coverage envisioned under the new law.

However, the roll out of the exchanges has been marked by persistent technical failures that have prevented millions from using them. Originally dismissed as "glitches" by the Obama administration, these problems now clearly represent profound design flaws in the system.

Today's revelations will no doubt escalate criticism of the exchanges in particular and the law in general, and may lead to dire political consequences for the president. Several of the individuals affected are understandably upset and angry with the Obama administration.

"I'm never voting Democrat again," says Pete Anderson, a welder from Dallas whose crime is listed as indecent exposure. "I tried to rent a new apartment today and was turned down because of the bogus charge in the registry. This never happened with Blue Cross. "

"The Republicans may be crazy," agrees Tamara Russell, a substitute kindergarten teacher from Eugene, Oregon. "But at least they don't publicly call you a necrophiliac on the Internet. This is so wrong."

Others were quick to use stronger language.

"This is bulls**t," proclaims freelance writer Dashiell Bennett. "I haven't had sex with a donkey in years. And even then, I never got caught. There's no way I should be on that list."

Victims of the this latest Obamacare mix-up have promised a class-action lawsuit against the government to compensate them for the emotional distress and repetitional damage.

http://dailycurrant.com/2013/10/21/obamacare-website-accidentally-enrolls-thousands-in-sex-offender-registry-2/

  • Members
Posted

I am pretty sure Christians did their part to secularize Christian holidays. Christians like/need money too, especially US Christians.

I have read a rendition of the history of the Bible as recounted by a 6 year old boy. He did much better than MS. Palin. ^_^

Best regards,

RA1

  • Members
Posted

lol, SPOILER ALERT:

_____

From the Daily Currant About page:

The Daily Currant is an English language online satirical newspaper that covers global politics, business, technology, entertainment, science, health and media. It is accessible from over 190 countries worldwide - now including South Sudan.

Our mission is to ridicule the timid ignorance which obstructs our progress, and promote intelligence - which presses forward.

Q. Are your news stories real?

A. No. Our stories are purely fictional. However they are meant to address real-world issues through satire and often refer and link to real events happening in the world

_____

Bad AdamSmith. bad, bad bad...

Guest hitoallusa
Posted

I love Sarah Palin.. Don't know why but I find her friendly and likable. Maybe her irrational way of thinking and cutesy words she uses align with my character.. ^_^

Posted

Well, if you overlook that you are kind-hearted and loving whereas she is mean-spirited and hate-filled.

Other than that, you could be sisters. ^_^

Once you take up shooting at defenseless animals from helicopters. :rolleyes:

palinkillsbigfoot.jpg

Guest hitoallusa
Posted

I just love her optimistic attitude.. Even though people are making fun of her, she picks herself up and pushes forward as if it doesn't bother her at all.. I think that is a very positive aspect of her..

Posted

She makes my skin crawl. It's that exact folksy attitude that has won over a lot of stupid gullible people who follow these idiots blindly. I'm really upset that we have a country full of uneducated people that believe whatever they hear. Very irritating and shameful of this country.

  • Members
Posted

I love Sarah Palin.. Don't know why but I find her friendly and likable. Maybe her irrational way of thinking and cutesy words she uses align with my character.. :smile:

Just don't count on her for your Maid of Honor! :rolleyes:

On March 1, 2011, Palin told National Organization for Marriage Chairman Maggie Gallagher that she opposed the Obama administration's refusal to continue defending the Defense of Marriage Act: "I have always believed that marriage is between one man and one woman. Like the majority of Americans, I support the Defense of Marriage Act and find it appalling that the Obama administration decided not to defend this federal law which was enacted with broad bipartisan support and signed into law by a Democrat president.

Political positions of Sarah Palin

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