AdamSmith Posted June 1, 2013 Share Posted June 1, 2013 Secret Messages Discovered in Donald Trump’s Hair! Is He Trying to Warn Us? By Bruce Handy and Juli Weiner Vanity Fair By M. Spencer Green/A.P. Photo. Moldy baguette Donald Trump was recently photographed outside a federal courthouse in Chicago, where he is currently being sued by an 87-year-old woman. Despite years of Trump-hair connoisseurship, your Vanity Fair follicular correspondents had never seen the thrice-bankrupted businessman’s fuzzy skull growth from such a revealing, harshly-lit angle. What initially appeared to be nothing more than a simple doppelgänger for a cavity-ridden tooth—or perhaps a half-popped popcorn kernel—turned out to be, upon closer inspection and with digital enhancement, something far more ominous. Donald Trump’s hair is trying to tell us something. Thanks to over a decade of analytic training under Dr. Carl Shatner at Columbia’s Andrew Stein School of Toupee and Combover Studies, and a close reading of Erich Von Daniken’s Follicles of the Gods in 8th grade, we were able to identify the crop-circle-like symbols formed by Trump’s scalp growth as Sumerian cuneiform likely dating back to the Neo-Assyrian Empire. After consulting our Rosetta Stone—literally, a Rosetta Stone DVD for Sumerian Cuneiform (Level II) purchased at the Atlanta airport—we were able to translate the hair’s message thusly: “People R begging me—begging me!—to run for Pres in 2016. Especially people close to loser Hillary. Rubio? DUMB! Will have announcement on season premiere of NBC’s top-rated #TheApprentice. @realDonaldTrump” Read more: Donald Trump’s Hair: The 360-Degree Tour. http://www.vanityfair.com/online/daily/2013/05/secret-messages-discovered-in-donald-trump-s-hair-is-he-trying-to-warn-us TotallyOz 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RA1 Posted June 1, 2013 Members Share Posted June 1, 2013 I have bought many strange things while dilly dallying at ATL but I have never noticed a cuneiform CD for sale. Probably it was over near the Ebonics section. I did once buy a thrown model airplane that would come back to the thrower. It would, so long as the thrower was the person selling them. Trump has my vote. But, not necessarily for President. Best regards, RA1 AdamSmith 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TotallyOz Posted June 1, 2013 Share Posted June 1, 2013 When I read the title here, I just knew I would be seeing the Mark of the Beast on his hairline. Damn. It just brought so many memories of Damion from The Omen. AdamSmith 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
