Joke for the Day: Add more if you want

[AdamSmith]

[RA1]

Practically harmless?

Best regards,

RA1

[lookin]

Practically harmless?

They're not mailable either.

You must be here to pick up your exploding penis

[AdamSmith]

Somebody doesn't like their landlord! This is a real listing I just found in the Apartments for Rent section of the local Craiglist.

$700 / 1br - 850ft2 - RENT A DUMP (NW Raleigh)

1BR / 1Ba 850ft2 apartment available now

Marchester on Millbrook!

You too can live the life of disrepair and discomfort with no working heat or air, leaky faucets, broken light fixtures, and parking lots just jam-packed with cars that no longer work, and garbage! Our lawn maintenance; complete with dead trees and shrubs, usually only seen around an abandoned factory, or warehouse is an eyesore to all.

Windows and doors are in terrible shape and you won't need curtains, mold and mildew grow freely between the panes of glass. Oh and we sure as hell won't be around to plow the parking lot in the winter, so be prepared to use all that sick time sitting trapped in your wonderful apartment. Pray the rain won't fall too hard, as most of the roof's leak, and the gutters we do have are full of pine needles, it just takes a little longer to drain out. And don't mind the squirrels in the attic, we just love our little critters here, beware walking to your mailbox, those pesky geese leave little slimy green logs everywhere. Isn't that cute!

Not far off Glenwood Avenue to the West, and Millbrook Road on the East, we have a filthy laundry area, and restrooms that are used frequently for oral, and drug induced Sex encounters. The Police are often found cruising through the area in great numbers, so rest assured you can feel Safe!

[MsGuy]

If the drug induced oral sex encounters are included in the rent, I'd say this sounds like a real find, AS.

[RA1]

We have "real" dumps here in MEM where even the police refuse to tread.

Best regards,

RA1

[AdamSmith]

[MsAnn]

Sorry ...I couldn't resist

[MsAnn]

[AdamSmith]

[MsAnn]

[AdamSmith]

[MsGuy]

AS, I take it the guy on the right is a visiting consultant, right?

[AdamSmith]

Or a hapless new hire, in a position that's supposed to have some autonomy to fix an inherited broken situation.

I've been that guy. After a month I told them sayonara.

[MsGuy]

AdamSmith, it's not that people really want the roof to fall in on their heads, but they're generally not much inclined to tolerate the the least bit of inconvenience¹ or discomfort while some smart ass stranger beavers away shoring up the supports.

¹ inconvenience (def.):

trouble or difficulty caused to one's personal requirements or comfort.

"the inconvenience of having to change trains"

synonyms: trouble, bother, problems, disruption, difficulty, disturbance;

[RA1]

AS-

When did you work for a Japanese conglomerate?

Best regards,

RA1

[AdamSmith]

Now that I think about it, the Japanese companies I've consulted into--Toyota mostly, also Kia a little bit--have wanted exactly the opposite of American firms. The Japanese want the young new expert to help everybody figure out how to fix everything and make it better, while appearing to leave everything exactly as it always was.

Telling.

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

[RA1]

That is quite a shag. Nine feet thick.

Don't forget adjusting the rabbit ears, banging on various parts of the cabinet to straighten the picture, knowing from memory which knob was the vertical hold and which the horizontal, etc.

Best regards,

RA1

[MsGuy]

RA1, remember taking tubes down to the store to test which one had gone bad?

Remember opening up the back of the TV to get to the tubes and reading that stenciled warning? Something to the effect that "there's a thingie somewhere in here that might just kill you dead if you touch it."

No picture or description of the thingie, though. Let the 10 year old figure things out for himself, I guess.

A more innocent time.

[lookin]

Remember opening up the back of the TV to get to the tubes and reading that stenciled warning? Something to the effect that "there's a thingie somewhere in here that might just kill you dead if you touch it."

It was the CRT that needed around 20,000 volts to bring you your Romper Room.

Even with the TV turned off and unplugged, there were capacitors inside that stored enough of a residual charge to put you on your ass. And not in the good way.

[RA1]

MsG-

Of course I remember testing tubes. I also remember wondering why all who stuck their hands in there did not suffer the fate mentioned by lookin.

It was a thrill to have your pop come back with more than one replacement tube. That kind of made the whole exercise worth while.

Naturally, whatever improvement was extant with replacing tubes was simply temporary. Something else failed or was less than 100% soon.

How did we survive those early days? And this was way before color.

Best regards,

RA1

[mvan1]

Speaking of JOKES -

Dear Abby, I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.

[mvan1]

And, perhaps another silly comment:

Dear Abby, You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?