AdamSmith Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 Aww that kid is so cute to prepare a card for her father.. What a sweet daughter.. Children are blessings.. How many shots of how many liquors this calls for is beyond counting! Quote
Guest hitoallusa Posted May 5, 2014 Posted May 5, 2014 Oh my AS please don't drink then That solves it. What about a cup of green tea? How many shots of how many liquors this calls for is beyond counting! Quote
Members RA1 Posted May 11, 2014 Members Posted May 11, 2014 And, vice versa? Best regards, RA1 AdamSmith 1 Quote
Guest Paragon Posted May 12, 2014 Posted May 12, 2014 The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense. Stolen from today's NYTimes. Quote
Members RA1 Posted May 12, 2014 Members Posted May 12, 2014 Likewise, the circus came to town; it was in tents. Stolen from my fevered brain. Best regards, RA1 Quote
Guest lurkerspeaks Posted May 13, 2014 Posted May 13, 2014 here is one, short and simple.... Q---- How do you make Holy Water?? A-- You boil the Hell out of it.. Quote
Members RA1 Posted May 13, 2014 Members Posted May 13, 2014 Also, how you cook kidneys. Boil the piss out of them. Best regards, RA1 Quote
Guest Paragon Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 A football coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said, “I’m not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play.” The player agreed, and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks, “Okay, now concentrate… what is two plus two?” The player thought for a moment and then he answered, “4?” “Did you say 4?!?” the coach exclaimed, excited that he got it right. At that, all the other players on the team began screaming, “COME ON COACH…GIVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE!!!” (Jay Dean) Quote
Guest Paragon Posted May 14, 2014 Posted May 14, 2014 A man is walking down the beach one day when he stumbles across a lamp…He rubs the lamp and out pops a GENIE…The Genie says that he has three wishes, but whatever he asks for, his ex-wife will get double….The man agrees and asks for ten million dollars…POOF…he gets it, but his wife gets 20 million…..The man’s second wish was a mansion in Hollywood….POOF..He gets a mansion, but his ex-wife gets TWO mansions……The GENIE says, “what is your third wish?” To which the man says, “beat me half to death.” Quote
Members wayout Posted May 15, 2014 Members Posted May 15, 2014 For other weird candies that actually exist: http://www.weirdworm.com/8-weird-candies-that-actually-exist/ Quote
Members RA1 Posted May 15, 2014 Members Posted May 15, 2014 I sure don't want those out of a cardboard box. Best regards, RA1 Quote
Members RA1 Posted May 20, 2014 Members Posted May 20, 2014 Mormons, also. Best regards, RA1 AdamSmith 1 Quote
Members MsGuy Posted May 20, 2014 Members Posted May 20, 2014 Mormons missionaries are a lot cuter than those pugly Jehovah's Witness drabs. wayout and AdamSmith 2 Quote
AdamSmith Posted May 20, 2014 Posted May 20, 2014 Rather more open to playing mind-fuck too. As would only be expected. Quote
Guest PasadenaCA Posted May 21, 2014 Posted May 21, 2014 Here's a simple and effective way to end the conversation. As you open the door say "Finally, are you with the Center for Disease Control?", while dressed like this: As they run away, yell, "Sorry, I meant the Center for Disease Control and Prevention. Please come back." Quote
Members wayout Posted May 21, 2014 Members Posted May 21, 2014 Mormons missionaries are a lot cuter than those pugly Jehovah's Witness drabs. Which brings to mind the obvious...Mormon missionary position RA1 and AdamSmith 2 Quote
AdamSmith Posted May 23, 2014 Posted May 23, 2014 'Ode to Joy' by Mr Bean: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=oWGZdYNpaSo wayout 1 Quote
