TotallyOz Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 How To Treat Your Fag Hag At Boy Toy, we talk a lot about how to deal with male escorts, how to suck cock, and ways to take it up the ass like a man without hurting yourself. That's all well and good and information you need to know. But, there is an aspect of gay life that doesn't involve dick at all! Even if you are the gayest gay in the village, women will be a part of your life. Everyone needs a fag hag, because sometimes you have to get away from your fuck buddies, and your straight male friends ain't going to set foot inside a Lady Ga Gay concert with you. But, having a fag hag isn't as simple as just hanging around with a gay-friendly girl. It's a relationship like any other, and needs to be nurtured. So, today we are going to give you some basic guidelines in fag hag maintenance. Don't worry - you won't have to change her oil or give her a lube job! The main job of dealing with your fag hag is drama minimization. If you think that your 20-year-old twink boytoy is dramarama, it's nothing compared to what you might have to deal with if you step on your fag hag's toes. You have to remember that having a fag hag is like any other relationship. You have to respect her feelings at all times, so that she doesn't get hurt or become overly emotional. So, this means you don't blow her off for weeks at a time when you have a new boyfriend. Trust me, she wants to hear all about him; so even if you don't have time to meet up for a Mai Tai, text her details about what's going on so she feels like she's being kept in the loop remember, you'll need her shoulder to cry on when/if he heads home with the head bartender! But while you want to keep her close, you can't keep her too close. It's easy for a fag hag to develop a crush on you, and she'll tell herself that you are a man who loves her for who she is and not simply because she has a vagina (like the straight men in her life). This means that even if you are on copious amounts of MDMA and start feeling like a mouth has no gender, you still can't let her make out with you or go down on you. It's crossing an important boundary and there will be emotional and dramatic repercussions down the line that you don't want to deal with. You also need to make sure that you don't make her feel bad about herself. If she's going through a dry spell picking up guys, then you don't need to brag to her about the three guys you hooked up with in the dark room of The Cock over the weekend. Because, then she'll start questioning why she isn't hooking up as much as you are and, do you really want to spend several days assuring her that there is a guy for her out there? That said, when she does hook up you need to listen to her. Yes, I know that hearing the down and dirty details of straight sex may not be your thing, but it's important to her to gush once in a while and she might feel that her female friends will judge her and that her straight male friends might get jealous, so you do have to listen to her. Just focus on the things that interest you. Ask what his dick was like, and then you can fantasize about it (without telling her, of course). And pick something out about the way he acted and tell her it was cute. Of course, you also need to give her a pat on the back it's all part of the process. On the other hand, it's a good idea to listen to her when she talks about dudes, and give her good advice. Girls often romanticize what guys do and put a lot of unrealistic expectations on them. But, you know what guys are really like. If she says things that are red flags to you that he may be a dickweed or in some other way taking advantage of her, you need to give her the straight advice so that she doesn't end up in a bad relationship. Hopefully, she'll do the same for you down the line. One of the main things to remember is that from time to time, she'll go to the gay bars and clubs with you. On these occasions, you really can't just pick up a guy and go home with him no matter how cute he is. It's dangerous for women to try to make their way home on their own, plus she'll feel blown off and hurt if you simply ditch her. Think of it this way - if you were out at her favorite bar, would you want her to ditch you there? It goes both ways. Another important thing is that her close friends and family members are off-limits. Yes, her brother who just came out of the closet might be super cute, and she may even encourage you to hook up with him - but don't do it. If a breakup happens, it will be messy and you'll be forcing her to chose sides. That's not fair to anyone. While on that subject, don't try to play matchmaker for her. You may be very well intentioned, but you don't want to get caught in a mess because if things go wrong, you'll be the one she blames. In dire situations, don't balk at playing her beau if she needs it. When you are out with her and a guy starts pestering her, you should step in and help her out of the situation. You can, of course, give her fashion advice when she needs it. You may be able to see how she could present herself better in order to attract more guys so that she has as many stories to share with you as you have with her. That said, you do need to stand your ground if she gets a boyfriend and starts blowing you off. What's good for the goose is good for the gander, and you need to set her straight if she starts to pull a disappearing act on you just because she's riding the cock fantastic for a couple of weeks. Keep all this stuff in mind, and you'll end up with a great shopping pal who is more than willing to listen to you when you are down and you'll always have someone to go to the Beyonce concert with. Fag hags are great to have around so treat them well, and you'll have a friend for life. AdamSmith, flipao and BiBottomBoy 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Thanks! I have never met a fag hag but it is a good article for me as a reference in the future... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 How do you live without a fag hag? TotallyOz 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 You obviously can... I have been fine without one.. You are a bi I guess for you it's not a fag hag...??? A girlfriend? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest josephga Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 I've never had a fag hag either. I'm mostly a loner in life not only no fag hag but actually no gay friends either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Not a girlfriend. When I have a fag hag I stay far away from her tuna. Sushi is just not for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamSmith Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Thanks! I have never met a fag hag but it is a good article for me as a reference in the future... I am having to suppress four or five remarks... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Do tell... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamSmith Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Read hitoall's first post closely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 I'm sure I'm missing something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamSmith Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 OK, tediously: The article will be a good reference for hitoall to learn how to be a good fag hag. ...he could be mine; I could be his (if we aren't already!); some people can be their very own! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted February 4, 2013 Share Posted February 4, 2013 Lol... You are so witty AS.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 5, 2013 Share Posted February 5, 2013 It's always interesting how many ways things can be read. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamSmith Posted February 5, 2013 Share Posted February 5, 2013 It's always interesting how many ways things can be read. That is my terror when writing contracts, and my delight when writing articles critical of companies that I can't quite afford to affront outright. RA1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 5, 2013 Share Posted February 5, 2013 Yeah. I think every marketing consultant in the world has gotten burned by using one wrong word in a contract at one point or another. I remember about a dozen years ago I agreed in the contract to do "reasonable revisions" - not realizing that "reasonable" could, in the client's mind (and their lawyer's mind) mean hundreds and hundreds of revisions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted February 5, 2013 Share Posted February 5, 2013 What you can do is write in a way that informed readers can figure it out in their own. I have seen a lot of books written in that way intentionally or unconsciously. Reading book is fun in that sense. One's writing is not exactly lifeless... It breathes and moves.. If an author struggles with a subject or hastily writes something then you can feel it. So some authors delivers once point without offending anyone directly. A lot of people can't catch it but those you are trying to deliver the message gets it and act on it. That's what I like about writing. It's not just made of sentences. It has life. That is my terror when writing contracts, and my delight when writing articles critical of companies that I can't quite afford to affront outright. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 5, 2013 Share Posted February 5, 2013 I concur. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamSmith Posted February 5, 2013 Share Posted February 5, 2013 I concur. Very droll. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdamSmith Posted February 5, 2013 Share Posted February 5, 2013 Yeah. I think every marketing consultant in the world has gotten burned by using one wrong word in a contract at one point or another. I remember about a dozen years ago I agreed in the contract to do "reasonable revisions" - not realizing that "reasonable" could, in the client's mind (and their lawyer's mind) mean hundreds and hundreds of revisions. Exactly. There cannot be one single ambiguous word. Except of course for those in your own favor! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RA1 Posted February 5, 2013 Members Share Posted February 5, 2013 I always write "unconsciously". Best regards, RA1 AdamSmith 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted February 6, 2013 Share Posted February 6, 2013 Me too - but that's gotten me in trouble over the years! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
