What to do....

[seattlebottom]

I don't have any close friends to talk with about this so I thought some on here might have some insight on this situation. I just found out that my 13 yr old niece was raped while spending the night at a friend's house. My sister (her mom) and I will be taking her to a hospital for evidence collection. I'm in complete shock right now but I need to know what, if anything, can I do for her? Has anyone dealt with something like this before?

[lookin]

I'm very sorry this happened to your niece and to you and your family. You'll probably get good advice from the doctor involved and perhaps from a counsellor who is experienced in dealing with these situations. The only thing I would suggest in addition is to try to let your niece get back to being a little girl as quickly as possible.

Certain things will have to be done, such as the hospital visit that you have planned. Hopefully, it will be handled with a minimum of fuss, bright lights, and drama. Perhaps your sister will think it's a good idea for your niece to see a counsellor. But I think there's sometimes a risk that your niece will be made to feel like an object with people poking and prodding her physically and emotionally. What's done is done, and she will need support, but there's no reason for that support to be invasive and intrusive. If your niece is made to feel like an oddity, and a victim, the trauma could be unnecessarily compounded.

As her uncle, maybe the best thing you can do is hold your sister's hand and help keep her calm, and then take your niece out for ice cream. She's a child, and that's what she wants to be. If you can help her get back to that as soon as possible and help her start laughing and playing again, I think you'll be the best uncle ever.

[Guest EXPAT]

If you call 2-1-1 in your area, they can refer you to some rape support counselors. I strongly recommend that course of action because she will be in denial, feel shame, anger, embarrassment etc for a while. I also think she should file charges. It's important to confront her attacker. So sorry this has happened to your family.

http://www.211.org (national organization)

[Guest hitoallusa]

I pray that your niece, her family and you recover well from this unfortunate event. I don't know this will encourage you but one of the gold medalists in London was a rape and sexual abuse victim. She overcame her past and achieve great things in her life. I pray that the same for your niece. I pray that she recover fast and peace be brought to her and loved ones around her. I pray for your comfort and peace in this challenge time of your life.

[seattlebottom]

Thanks for all of your kind words and advice. All things considered she seems to be doing ok. We've set up counseling for her and she'll begin seeing a therapist next Thursday.

[Guest FourAces]

Thankfully I have not had to deal with such a horrific situation. But I'm sure if you are there for her and continue to show your love that will help. I wish all the best for her emotional and physical recovery.

[Guest hitoallusa]

Seattlebottom I hope you are doing well and your niece is recovering. We send you lots of hugs and love to you and your niece..

Thankfully I have not had to deal with such a horrific situation. But I'm sure if you are there for her and continue to show your love that will help. I wish all the best for her emotional and physical recovery.

[seattlebottom]

Seattlebottom I hope you are doing well and your niece is recovering. We send you lots of hugs and love to you and your niece..

Thank you for the good wishes. Things are calming down a bit but I know that things will never be the same again for her or any of us.

[Guest hitoallusa]

Thank for letting us know how you are doing. Good to hear that you are doing well. Everybody goes through unexpected hardship from time to time. I hope your niece can overcome this unfortunate event and grow up to be a fine lady. Cheers...