Guest FourAces Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 For many years I earned enough money playing poker to do it full time. I mostly played cash games ando nce in a while took a shot at a tournament. For those who are not poker players the two types of games play quite differently. In any event it had been an awesome 9 years ... travelling around the states checking out different casinos and doing something I truly enjoyed for a living. About a year ago I slowly cut back on my playing. Sticking to games in my area and a few trips to So California card rooms. I didn't do so well. In January of this year I went a bit wild ... used terrible money management and by mid-February was totally broke losing tens of thousands of dollars in about six weeks time. I know like food I am addicted to gambling so staying away form casinos at this point is a must. The past few months I been living on my small savings which is running out. Reality has set in and now I know I must return to work ... which at my age will not be easy to do. Anybody find themselves in a starting over type situation? Were you able to over come it? If so how did you do so if you don't mind sharing? Quote
Members Suckrates Posted April 4, 2012 Members Posted April 4, 2012 After a 22 year relationship with my partner, he died suddenly, and at 50 yo I found myself an OLD gay single man starting over in Life. At the same time, i was diagnosed with cancer, and found my job was ending as the company was failing. So a Tri-fecta for me. What to do? Have faith and stay positive, BUT you need to do something. Thru networking, I found a new job thru a reference, tended to my health issues, and after a long mourning period started to socialize, althought I am still single now 11 years later....And keep in mind, I have NO family left so was all on my own with nO help from anyone anywhere... YES, its tuff, but what is the alternative? you have to keep going.... Quote
Guest gcursor Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 FourAces: I read your posting and it resonated with me. Recently (well last Summer now) I was laid off from my job after several years. I was all alone wondering what to do. Would I survive? What worked for me? You have to look at the world around you and explore what interests you. For example, one day I was surfing the web and saw an article for virtual volunteering. I thought to myself, "Gee..I've always wanted to volunteer at a gay organization." Eventually this led me to volunteer to assist in doing an AIDS presentation for a doctor in Kansas City. I was very pleased with the results as was she. Also I started entering online sweepstakes. I mean they are free and I had some free time so why not? I entered some contests for a while (took maybe an hour a day) and I won an all-expense paid trip to LA with some nice "experiences" in a very short period of time. I know that this isn't TYPICAL about how quickly somebody will win something but it's still part of the point I'm making. Keep your eyes and ears open now for things that you are interested in and follow your heart's desires. I can't tell you what will happen when you do except that you will have some type of adventure. You don't know where the next opportunity will come from so start poking around with what you have in front of you. Look at your emails and see if anything sparks your interest. Look online and see what you can find. As for me, I am now preparing for college "placement" tets by studying and preparing myself. People thought I was foolish not to get back into IT but I had done that for so many years. I now shifted my focus to something along the lines of a digital media specialist which I think will give me a skill set that will put me somewhere I want to be in the future. There's a lot of stuff out there FourAces in the big world. See what is there in your everyday life and keep your mind open to what may interest you. Follow up on things which you enjoy doing. See where those opportunities may take you and embrace the different adventures that are available to you. all my best, gcursor Quote
Guest FourAces Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Hey thanks for your sharing and words of encouragement guys. Quote
Guest lurkerspeaks Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 To comment on Suckrates post.. I too always try to keep a positive outlook on life. We all have hardships. But we each have to choose--do you let the obstacles defeat you, or do you defeat them? Another of my favorite quotes which also kinda fits here.."If you always do what you've always done, You will always get what you always got". In other words, if you want a different outcome, you have to do something different. Quote
Guest hitoallusa Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 Good luck Four Aces... Wish you all the best... Quote
Guest EXPAT Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I've had quite the medical experience over the last 12 months and it's not over yet. My bills are going to be so high potentially going forward that I may have to go back to work after deciding to retire early. So I can fully appreciate what you are going through and it may not be easy to get back into the swing of 75 hour work weeks if that is the direction I take if necessary. But it may be considering the medical bills I may face the rest of my life. We'll see how things go over the next few months. Fortunately we found a treatment but it costing a huge amount of money because it's a rare treatment. Quote
Members lookin Posted April 4, 2012 Members Posted April 4, 2012 I bottomed out in my late forties after losing my partner. I was in commission sales and didn't feel like selling anything. Or getting out of bed, for that matter. At my lowest, I even borrowed five hundred bucks from my Mom, who was getting by on Social Security. I started taking Prozac, with the downside of shutting off most feelings, both positive and negative, but it did let me put one foot in front of the other and get through the day. I had a terrific grief counselor who, when I told her I'd have to start seeing her half as often for financial reasons, told me she thought that wasn't such a good idea, and halved her fee instead. It took a year or so, but I was able to turn things around at work, pay my Mom back, and get off Prozac. I kept seeing the grief counselor for years, reverting to her original fee plus some, and learning a bunch about myself and life in general. One thing I learned is that, for me, ten years is a long time to do one thing. Some folks settle into a career that satisfies them for a long time, but I enjoy learning new things. Once I've got the juice out of the orange, I like looking for a nice ripe mango. So, yes, FourAces, I did start over with a very positive outcome. I think the secret is to keep your communications open with a good friend or two and look for some professional guidance if you feel you are heading in the wrong direction. And, as gcursor says, volunteering is a great way to keep a healthy outlook. You seem like a very social guy who finds home wherever he is, so you may have an easier time than you think. Hope you know that you have some friends here, and please don't hesitate to keep reaching out. We all look forward to seeing your next act. Quote
TotallyOz Posted April 4, 2012 Posted April 4, 2012 I have had a few life altering changes with regards to jobs and work. The latest is I have not really worked a "regular" job for over 15 years. The past October, a friend in LA who owns his own company asked me to work for him. I was not interested at all but he made the deal so sweet for me that I could not refuse. It was not the money that was sweet but the benefits and I took him up on the offer. I now have an office job several days a week and have a staff of people that report to me. The job mostly relates to SEO and Social Media so it is something I am very interested in but I never thought I'd be working for someone again for a long period of time. I have done consulting work for years but that is mostly a week to a month at the most. So, this one has really thrown me for a loop. I figured since the economy is so bad, even for porn guys, that I'd give it a try. So far it is worked well. It just means I have less time to enjoy what I thought was my retirement. I do understand the point of casinos. If that is an addiction, it must be hard to move away from as that is where your income has been procured for a few years. Having an addictive personality myself, I can relate but not sure I'd have the ability to leave something that was prosperous for me. I wish you luck in your new direction. That being said, have you decided where you are headed? What kind of work you will do? Quote
Members marcanthony Posted April 4, 2012 Members Posted April 4, 2012 Aces: I truly wish you the best. It won't be easy, but it won't be impossible. Quote
Guest gcursor Posted April 5, 2012 Posted April 5, 2012 Lookin, you had one helluva great counselor. When I lost my mom, I went to a new counselor and he knew I was having issues. He said to me on a few different occasions, "You know I would be open to seeing you a few times a week if you need it" and I was thinking, "Uh..yes...along with the money too?" It's part of that altruistic nature of mine but sometimes when people like that do stuff, all I see if them chasing the money. They do try in their own way but sometimes I think they should go further. I remember one particularly bad day I was having and he called me that night at home and asked me how I was doing. Although in all the months I went to him, that was the only time he ever did that. gcursor Quote
Guest FourAces Posted April 5, 2012 Posted April 5, 2012 That being said, have you decided where you are headed? What kind of work you will do? Your first question I find the answer in a John Lennon song, "how can I go forward if I don't know which way I'm facing?" I have a varied backgorund however most of it being either consumer finance automobiles or techncal support telcommunications. I'll probably end up in a cubein some cal center asking do you want text messaging with that What I would like to do however, don't know enough about it to know if I can make a reasonable living is be a self emp Mediator. In Texas one only needs a 40 hour class to be accespted by the courts as a mediator and an additional 24 hour class if one wants to do family mediation as well. At least in Texas you do not need any law education to work as one or receive referrals. I am still researching it but my time frame is limited so my options are now also limited. --- and again thanks to the others who have shared or wished me the best in this thread. Its very kind of you guys. Quote
Members Suckrates Posted April 5, 2012 Members Posted April 5, 2012 The words I ALWAYS live by are - "This Too Shall Pass". In fact I have it tatooed on my arm. Kinda rings true. Quote
Guest FourAces Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Well I thought I would update this. If for no other reason maybe another person will be inthe same situation as me and read thereis a little hope. I did get a job today. It seems so weird to say that after so many years of doing it on my own. But I have an addictive personality and I know going back to poker, even if I had the funds, probablly not the best idea at this point. I don't want to be too specific but I was hired by a large financial institution. The pay sucks but since I have no money left I cannot complain. On the plus side the benefits are good and I will be saving much money on health insurance alone. I currently pay $750. x month and after 30days will pay about $50. a month. So I net $700. which I guess I could add to my pay to make it look better The rest of the benefit package also is solid including, stock options, employer matching 401k vested 100% after 6 months and other typical stuff. I begin in a few week. It is a strange feeling returning to a so called normal job but hey compared to some I am blessed or at least very lucky Quote
Guest hitoallusa Posted April 10, 2012 Posted April 10, 2012 Congrats FourAces!!! I wish you the best in your new endeavor.. Well I thought I would update this. If for no other reason maybe another person will be inthe same situation as me and read thereis a little hope. I did get a job today. It seems so weird to say that after so many years of doing it on my own. But I have an addictive personality and I know going back to poker, even if I had the funds, probablly not the best idea at this point. I don't want to be too specific but I was hired by a large financial institution. The pay sucks but since I have no money left I cannot complain. On the plus side the benefits are good and I will be saving much money on health insurance alone. I currently pay $750. x month and after 30days will pay about $50. a month. So I net $700. which I guess I could add to my pay to make it look better The rest of the benefit package also is solid including, stock options, employer matching 401k vested 100% after 6 months and other typical stuff. I begin in a few week. It is a strange feeling returning to a so called normal job but hey compared to some I am blessed or at least very lucky Quote
Guest gcursor Posted April 11, 2012 Posted April 11, 2012 I was very happy to hear about your resolution FourAces. I'm glad that things are going in such a positive way for you right now. Quote
Guest FourAces Posted April 11, 2012 Posted April 11, 2012 I was very happy to hear about your resolution FourAces. I'm glad that things are going in such a positive way for you right now. G I appreciate the kind words. Quote
Members eeyore Posted April 11, 2012 Members Posted April 11, 2012 Best wishes in your new endeavors going forward. Quote
Guest FourAces Posted April 11, 2012 Posted April 11, 2012 Best wishes in your new endeavors going forward. Many thanks Quote
Members lookin Posted April 11, 2012 Members Posted April 11, 2012 I don't want to be too specific but I was hired by a large financial institution. Congratulations, and once you are all settled in I would love to discuss the feasibility of a modest unsecured cash advance, say in the two hundred dollar range. Likewise, I'd prefer not to be too specific. Quote
Guest FourAces Posted April 11, 2012 Posted April 11, 2012 Congratulations, and once you are all settled in I would love to discuss the feasibility of a modest unsecured cash advance, say in the two hundred dollar range. Likewise, I'd prefer not to be too specific. gee I am banging my head against the wall I just cannot figure out what it might be for. But OK you got it ... and thanks for the nice thoughts! Quote
