Members ihpguy Posted December 5, 2011 Members Share Posted December 5, 2011 C'mon now, get with the program! The terrorists have run out of younger people willing to sacrifice the balance of their life, so they've been recruiting those whose balance isn't so good. They've moved on from underwear bombers to Depends bombers. They've cleverly found a way to create exploding adult diapers and have used harmless looking little old ladies to deliver the diapers of death on to the aircraft. I suppose my 94 year-old Mom has reasons not to. fly. Oh, wait! She doesn't yet use a walker in which she could hide her explosives. Or hearing aids for those remotely-controlled devices. Or a super-secret, self-detonating, implanted pacemaker. From the NY Daily News: An 85-year-old Long Island grandmother says she plans to sue the TSA after a humiliating strip search on Tuesday by agents at JFK Airport. Lenore Zimmerman, who lives in Long Beach, says she was on her way to a 1 p.m. flight to Fort Lauderdale when security whisked her to a private room and took off her clothes. “I walk with a walker — I really look like a terrorist,” she said sarcastically. “I’m tiny. I weigh 110 pounds, 107 without clothes, and I was strip-searched.” TSA spokeswoman Lisa Farbstein said a review of closed circuit TV footage from the airport shows “proper procedures were followed.” But Zimmerman, whose hunched back puts her at 4-foot-11, said her ordeal began after her son, Bruce, drove her to the JetBlue terminal for the Florida flight. She lives in warm Coconut Creek during the winter. She checked her bags, waited for a wheelchair and parted ways with her doting son — her only immediate relative. When Zimmerman reached a security checkpoint, she asked if she could forgo the advanced image technology screening equipment, fearing it might interfere with her defibrillator. She said she normally gets patted down. But this time, she says that two female agents escorted her to a private room and began to remove her clothes. “I was outraged,” said Zimmerman, a retired receptionist. As she tried to lift a lightweight walker off her lap, she says, the metal bars banged against her leg and blood trickled from a gash. “My sock was soaked with blood,” she said. “I was bleeding like a pig.” She says the TSA agents showed no sympathy, instead pulling down her pants and asking her to raise her arms. “Why are you doing this?” she said she asked the agents, who did not respond. The TSA claims the footage does not show any sign of the injury. “Our screening procedures are conducted in a manner designed to treat all passengers with dignity, respect and courtesy,” Farbstein said. Zimmerman says a medic arrived to treat her injury. The process took so long that she missed her 1 p.m. flight and had to catch a later one. Her son said he was shocked when his mom called around 9 p.m. that night and described what happened. “She was put through a hell of a day,” he said. Zimmerman, who takes blood thinners, later had a tetanus shot for fear of infection from the walker wound. Bruce Zimmerman, 53, said he can’t understand why the agents targeted his mom. “She looks like a sweet, little old lady,” he said. “She’s not a disruptive person or uncooperative.” Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/lenore-zimmerman-85-hurt-strip-search-tsa-agents-jfk-airport-article-1.986198#ixzz1feUwlrQY Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 I wonder what, exactly, the criteria the TSA uses for strip searches and if, perhaps, it's just every random numbered person. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ihpguy Posted December 5, 2011 Author Members Share Posted December 5, 2011 I wonder what, exactly, the criteria the TSA uses for strip searches and if, perhaps, it's just every random numbered person. Maybe they kept here imprisoned until she divulged her Lukshen Kugel recipe? Or with Chanukah approaching, the secret to the lightness of her Potato Latkes? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RA1 Posted December 5, 2011 Members Share Posted December 5, 2011 http://www.avweb.com/blogs/insider/Security_First_Time_Traveler_205821-1.html I am more than positive that the TSA use a "formula" for most of their actions to include strip searches, "random" anything and, of course, their methology for "additional" security measures, such as buying a one way ticket. During my career, I would easily surmise that 90+% of the airline tickets I bought were one way. Years ago that attracted the attention of US customs, the US' first line of defense then for keeping terrorists at bay. Some might find the link interesting. It mentions the 85 yo lady. Best regards, RA1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted December 6, 2011 Share Posted December 6, 2011 Yummy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ihpguy Posted December 6, 2011 Author Members Share Posted December 6, 2011 Yummy! Kugel, Latkes or TSA officers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lookin Posted December 7, 2011 Members Share Posted December 7, 2011 I flew out of SFO a couple of months ago, walking a few feet from where a friend dropped me off at the curb to the check-in counter. After a few minutes, I noticed a carry-on bag that didn't seem to belong to anyone waiting in line. As the line moved forward, the large rather worn bag soon stood all by itself, surrounded by nothing and no one. Other than the Hari Krishnas that used to solicit inside the airports, it was the first time I ever saw anything that made me nervous. I thought how easy it would have been for someone to drive to the curb, roll the bag into line, get back in his car, and blow it up from fifty yards away. We finally got an oblivious agent at the counter to call airport security, but I was well on the way to my gate and still no one had responded. Thirty yards away, however, were a half-dozen of TSA's finest getting ready to frisk any old lady sinister enough to look at them cross-eyed. And for this we're supposed to feel safer? Oi! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Lucky Posted December 7, 2011 Members Share Posted December 7, 2011 Gosh, Lookin, I know what that bag was. Ya see, I had brought my dildo collection and my super-sized vibrating butt plug along for a play date, and then when I realized it might get searched in front of all those people, I got nervous. And then the butt plug started vibrating and I just pictured the fun the TSA agents would have embarrassing me, so I tried to discreetly push it to the aside. Sorry if it unnerved you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 The one in the picture. Latkes? Never tried it but it looks yummy. I once found a very cute TSA agent at an airport. I wanted to be searched by him but it didn't happen. Kugel, Latkes or TSA officers? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 Lookin but nothing happened so I guess they knew what they were doing. TSA agents are one of us too and they could be our relatives, brothers, sisters, neighbors and etc.. They are doing best to protect people. Yes some people are competent than others and there are always bad crops. Let's not be discouraged and scared, however. Then Osama wins and that's what he wants. Anyways, thank you for notifying airport security. People like you are hidden heroes! We should give you an honorary citizen medal. MsGuy can you find a good one for our Lookin? I flew out of SFO a couple of months ago, walking a few feet from where a friend dropped me off at the curb to the check-in counter. After a few minutes, I noticed a carry-on bag that didn't seem to belong to anyone waiting in line. As the line moved forward, the large rather worn bag soon stood all by itself, surrounded by nothing and no one. Other than the Hari Krishnas that used to solicit inside the airports, it was the first time I ever saw anything that made me nervous. I thought how easy it would have been for someone to drive to the curb, roll the bag into line, get back in his car, and blow it up from fifty yards away. We finally got an oblivious agent at the counter to call airport security, but I was well on the way to my gate and still no one had responded. Thirty yards away, however, were a half-dozen of TSA's finest getting ready to frisk any old lady sinister enough to look at them cross-eyed. And for this we're supposed to feel safer? Oi! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members ihpguy Posted December 7, 2011 Author Members Share Posted December 7, 2011 Lookin but nothing happened so I guess they knew what they were doing. TSA agents are one of us too and they could be our relatives, brothers, sisters, neighbors and etc.. They are doing best to protect people. Yes some people are competent than others and there are always bad crops. Let's not be discouraged and scared, however. Then Osama wins and that's what he wants. Anyways, thank you for notifying airport security. People like you are hidden heroes! We should give you an honorary citizen medal. MsGuy can you find a good one for our Lookin? Something yummy and something yummier, depends what you are hungry for... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 I try to avoid fried food and also avoid(?) hot guys... But a hot TSA agent can stroke me anytime.... I bet they hate their jobs too... ): Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 Pretty hard for Osama to win given that we killed him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members lookin Posted December 7, 2011 Members Share Posted December 7, 2011 Gosh, Lookin, I know what that bag was. Ya see, I had brought my dildo collection and my super-sized vibrating butt plug along for a play date . . . Ah! I should have thought of that, although I had always pictured your travelling toy collection as a bit more robust. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 When I travel I make sure I only bring my smaller dildos so the TSA guys don't feel inadequate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members RA1 Posted December 7, 2011 Members Share Posted December 7, 2011 So you think being rude and bullying people is a sign of inadequacy also? I like your consideration. Best regards, RA1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 My experience has been that bullies tend to have small dicks. (Which is sort of a shame, because bullies can be hot if I'm in a rough sex mood, but it sort of kills the bully sex drive effect when their cocks barely stick out from their pubes.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hitoallusa Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 Why would you sleep with bullies? My experience has been that bullies tend to have small dicks. (Which is sort of a shame, because bullies can be hot if I'm in a rough sex mood, but it sort of kills the bully sex drive effect when their cocks barely stick out from their pubes.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BiBottomBoy Posted December 7, 2011 Share Posted December 7, 2011 Because strong scary men who are assholes sometimes turn me on. I don't want to date them, but I'm happy to suck their cocks while they say mean shit to me or have them throw me on a bed and fuck the shit out of me while saying awful things. I call it "asshole sex" which is not anal sex, it's sex with someone you know is an asshole, and it can be really fucking hot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
