After we die

[Guest hitoallusa]

I've always feared death because you don't know what's going to happen. Even Jesus didn't tell us what happened between his death and resurrection so I will never know till i actually die. One thing I wish for is I don't want to feel pain. I want to be in peace. What do you wish for when you die?

[Lucky]

Did I just hear someone say that they want to know what happens when they die? On a site about gay male escorts? Well, I happen to know the answer.

It's a myth that that the Quran specifies 72 virgins, but here are some quotes that may have you converting tomorrow:

QURAN 52:24): "And there will go round boy-servants of theirs, to serve them as if they were preserved pearls."

(QURAN 56:17): "They will be served by immortal boys."

(QURAN 76:19): "And round about them will (serve) boys of everlasting youth. If you see them, you would think them scattered pearls." (albatrus.org- and no, I didn't verify the quotes.)

[seattlebottom]

All my life I have had a fairly structured life with all things done at their appropriate time. I even schedule sexual encounters! My fear is dying without truly knowing what life is.

[Guest hitoallusa]

Servants in our after-life? That's worse than our current life, isn't it? I want it to be nice and peaceful. All creatures are happy and not subject to slavery or abuse. I don't think no one will want to convert to Islam if they condone slavery for the pleasure of selected few.

Did I just hear someone say that they want to know what happens when they die? On a site about gay male escorts? Well, I happen to know the answer.

It's a myth that that the Quran specifies 72 virgins, but here are some quotes that may have you converting tomorrow:

QURAN 52:24): "And there will go round boy-servants of theirs, to serve them as if they were preserved pearls."

(QURAN 56:17): "They will be served by immortal boys."

(QURAN 76:19): "And round about them will (serve) boys of everlasting youth. If you see them, you would think them scattered pearls." (albatrus.org- and no, I didn't verify the quotes.)

[Guest CharliePS]

I don't fear death, because I don't expect to consciously experience anything, not even the dissolution of my physical remains as they are consumed by worms, bacteria or fire. However, I do hope that a few people will occasionally remember me fondly, or at least with some gratitude as they utilize whatever assets, personal effects or products I leave behind.

[Guest EXPAT]

I've always feared death because you don't know what's going to happen. Even Jesus didn't tell us what happened between his death and resurrection so I will never know till i actually die. One thing I wish for is I don't want to feel pain. I want to be in peace. What do you wish for when you die?

I have to say this post scared me a little. I wondered if we needed to send someone to your house to make sure you were alright.

[Lucky]

Death has been on my mind lately, having attended a funeral last week. In the course of my travels, I read a novel by James Lee Burke, an author whom I quite admire. He has a comment in the novel, Feast Day of Fools, that mortality is the price of admission to the ballpark. I think of it more as a carnival than a ballgame, though.

Hitoall is not alone if fearing pain. Modern medicine has come a long way in keeping one's final days relatively painless, if possible. Ultimately we have to accept that we do not control our demise- it's going to happen no matter how we feel about it. Once accepted, then it probably becomes a little less disquieting...of course, I don't know yet.

[Guest hitoallusa]

Thanks Seattlebottom and Lucky... I might have been a bit sentimental. Thank you for your thoughts.

[Guest hitoallusa]

Thanks EXPAT for your concern. You are so sweet. My doors are always open for you though .

I have to say this post scared me a little. I wondered if we needed to send someone to your house to make sure you were alright.

[Guest gcursor]

I am terribly scared to die which is weird considering some of the things I've done in my life. However I've started learning recently that I have a terrible mortal fear of dying to the extreme. I would go so far as saying that if somebody told me that I have an incurable disease then I would tell the doctor not to tell me how long I have to live because I would spend the rest of my time worrying incessantly about it.

I have often tried to reconcile within myself what happens when we die. Although I have a hard time believing in a greater Power in the world (except of course Oz), I also believe in ghosts. I have seen far too many weird things on tv, movies and everything else to NOT think that spirits are among us. Once you start believing in spirits then it starts to become a slippery slope as to what other "after-death" experiences do you believe in?

Recently I started studying a bit of a pseudo-religion called anthroposophy. This was first introduced by Rudolf Steiner and it's kind of more a thinking man's meditative spiritual experience...sort of. It is something else that I've started to explore to help me make sense of spirits and eternal life.

Also I have come to a working theory as to why people die. One of the ideas that I have is that people die when they have become too good (as to go on to the next level) or too evil. Once either of these extremes are hit then your time is usually up. Of course, we never really know when we have achieved true good or true evil but I think that there are signs along the way warning us. Some of us are too stubborn though to admit that these signs exist and go blindly about our life anyway. However some of us see these signs (a voice in the back of our head, a car that smashes into another car 5 seconds after we've gone through an intersection, or a myriad of other things) and mentally note those signs. However what these signs tell us is something that nobody can understand. We can only observe what is happening and think about our life and the decisions we make striving to work towards what is best for each one of us.

Oh..and I have watched several documentaries on death. One of the leading theories is that the "final flashbacks" occur in your mind as a result of your brain's chemicals slowly draining from your system. NASA astronauts experience the same thing when they go through too many G-forces in the simulator and pass out. My aunt told me to read this book (which I ordered and never read) called 90 minutes in Heaven. It's about this preacher who was clinically dead for 90 minutes and came back to life. I told her, "OF COURSE it would have to be a preacher who wrote the story. Why couldn't it have been a mailman?" So I continue searching for answers as everybody does..and yet my mind still keeps wandering back to ghosts..what makes ghosts..how do they end up happening..something is causing them.

and sometimes I think to myself, What if there IS no after-life? What if you die and that's it? What if there is no loved ones reunion? What if that spouse or parent that you really wanted to see is gone forever? What would happen then? Would you still be afraid of death? Would religion still hold you in check knowing that this is it?

and yet..there are still those unanswered questions about ghosts. haunting me everyday. teasing me as if to say, "there is an after-life David. we're waiting for you. you'll see."

Here endeth today's sermon...

[MsGuy]

Guys, you already know from personal experience exactly what it's like after you die. It's the same as before you were concieved. Exactly.

When you think of it that way, it's no very big deal. Focus on your time here and quit worrying so much about what happens when you're not around anymore. You're just not around.

----

PS If possible, let us know you're going to be gone, as did NCM over on Daddy's. It's better when your friends have a chance to say goodbye, both for you and for them.

[Lucky]

Hmmm...let us know if you're going to die. That's what I keep telling God, let me know when I am going to die. He just laughs.

And who knew God was from Kentucky?

Or, maybe you would like this one:

[RA1]

Guys, you already know from personal experience exactly what it's like after you die. It's the same as before you were concieved. Exactly.

When you think of it that way, it's no very big deal. Focus on your time here and quit worrying so much about what happens when you're not around anymore. You're just not around.

----

PS If possible, let us know you're going to be gone, as did NCM over on Daddy's. It's better when your friends have a chance to say goodbye, both for you and for them.

Did you really know NCM was going from his public posts or did he PM you? He actually sent me a PM from the hospital but I did not know for sure he was that ill. Perhaps I was not being perceptive enough. Earlier that spring I had encouraged him to go with a friend of his on a boat repositioning from FL to MN. He wanted to do that but may not have had the strength to do so.

I know you are going to think it strange that NCM and I PM'd because we are so different, but, we did and, except for politics, got along just fine.

Best regards,

RA1

[Guest epigonos]

This is a most interesting topic. The things that throws me (frighten isn't right in my case) is just how fast time goes. For example it seems like just yesterday that I retired yet in June it will be ten years ago. As a card carrying apathists I don't really concern myself with religious philosophy. I hope I live each day as if it were my last and let the chips fall where they might. All of my life I have tried (not always successfully) to worry only about the things over which I have some control. I have NO control over my own death so I tend to ignore it. In many ways I fear the deaths of my loved ones far more than I fear my own. I have only one sibling, a sister, who is ten years older than I am and the very thought of loosing her absolutely terrifies me.

[Guest CharliePS]

This is a most interesting topic. The things that throws me (frighten isn't right in my case) is just how fast time goes. For example it seems like just yesterday that I retired yet in June it will be ten years ago. As a card carrying apathists I don't really concern myself with religious philosophy. I hope I live each day as if it were my last and let the chips fall where they might. All of my life I have tried (not always successfully) to worry only about the things over which I have some control. I have NO control over my own death so I tend to ignore it. In many ways I fear the deaths of my loved ones far more than I fear my own. I have only one sibling, a sister, who is ten years older than I am and the very thought of loosing her absolutely terrifies me.

Epigonos, if there is one thing that you are NOT, it's an "apathist."

[Lucky]

I had to Google it:

The simple theory of the apathist:

Perhaps there is a god, or gods, or goddesses, or higher powers.

Perhaps not.

It's irrelevant.

You do the most good you can with what you have.

If you get help from somewhere else,

that's just icing on the cake.

[Guest CharliePS]

I had to Google it:

The simple theory of the apathist:

Perhaps there is a god, or gods, or goddesses, or higher powers.

Perhaps not.

It's irrelevant.

You do the most good you can with what you have.

If you get help from somewhere else,

that's just icing on the cake.

I apologize. I thought it was a typo for atheist. The Urban Dictionary defines it as someone who is apathetic--uninterested or unexcited about anything. I guess I'm an apathist, or really an apatheist.

[Lucky]

Well, thanks, hitoallusa. You have started an interesting thread. But damn. I lost that extra hour I gained last night tossing and turning in bed. I was thinking of my friend who had died. She was ill, but didn't see it coming. I thought of how cold and final death is. I remembered the feelings of terror we had during the height of the AIDS epidemic.

Death is scary. Mother Nature is never colder than when she takes a multitude of lives in a tsunami, a hurricane, an earthquake or tornado. Even a car wreck brings death in droves, such as the one in England this weekend.

Last week, a former pitcher for the St. Louis Cardinals threw out the ceremonial first pitch- a week later he was dead at 61.

I give kudos to Epigonos for being the first man here to admit to "sheer terror," although not for his death, but that of his sister. Losing a person close to you can be extremely painful. Worrying how a survivor of your death will do when you are gone can bring deep thoughts and deep stress.

Yet we are all going to go, yes, this includes this message board membership of aging gay men. Hopefully we all live to ripe old age, which is some comfort, but we know that won't be true. Death has already struck the old Hooboy site. Aging gracefully, accepting death- these are the challenges facing us. I admire the guys who are not letting the grass grow as they continue living, traveling, sharing time with their families, and yes, keep on hiring. All of that is probably the best recipe for the times.

[Guest hitoallusa]

All I ask is that if any of us meet again in after life then I hope we can smile each other and be happy to see each other. If I can do that then I think I will be okay.

[Guest gcursor]

I'd like to make an amendment in what Lucky said. The administrators of this board and the other board I'm quite certain are EXEMPT from dying! There is a contract that they sign which states (in small type) that all board responsibilities will continue infinitely throughout all manner of personal tragedies (including but not limited to death, serious illness and others) and through any type of man-made natural disasters (nuclear bomb, Congress actually passing a bill, or Barney taking over the world). The clause further states that people will continually be "re purposed" to achieve maximum efficiency in the future and to meet the demand of future users. The clause further states that "whereupon the 'eternal administrator' FAILS or declines to do said responsibilities infinitely then the 'eternal administrator' will face the wrath of THE ONE"

Well, thanks, hitoallusa. You have started an interesting thread. But damn. I lost that extra hour I gained last night tossing and turning in bed. I was thinking of my friend who had died. She was ill, but didn't see it coming. I thought of how cold and final death is. I remembered the feelings of terror we had during the height of the AIDS epidemic.

Death is scary. Mother Nature is never colder than when she takes a multitude of lives in a tsunami, a hurricane, an earthquake or tornado. Even a car wreck brings death in droves, such as the one in England this weekend.

Last week, a former pitcher for the St. Louis Cardinals threw out the ceremonial first pitch- a week later he was dead at 61.

I give kudos to Epigonos for being the first man here to admit to "sheer terror," although not for his death, but that of his sister. Losing a person close to you can be extremely painful. Worrying how a survivor of your death will do when you are gone can bring deep thoughts and deep stress.

Yet we are all going to go, yes, this includes this message board membership of aging gay men. Hopefully we all live to ripe old age, which is some comfort, but we know that won't be true. Death has already struck the old Hooboy site. Aging gracefully, accepting death- these are the challenges facing us. I admire the guys who are not letting the grass grow as they continue living, traveling, sharing time with their families, and yes, keep on hiring. All of that is probably the best recipe for the times.