What Would You Have Done?

[Lucky]

Okay, this tale goes back some many years, but I am always interested in how others might have reacted to a situation where I didn't know exactly what to do.

Early in my career I moonlighted teaching business and consumer law at a Business College. I was closeted, but had already came out to myself.

One of my students, actually the best one getting all As, was a beautiful young woman. Because she was smart and almost always knew the answer, I called on her a lot. She was cute, boyish-looking, and smart. Married, too. She took two classes from me and that was it.

Until. That is, until I received a call from her at work one day after the classes were over. She said she wanted to get together for lunch or whatever. I asked if this as business or pleasure...she responded: whatever you want it to be"

So you are probably already guessing what she said when we went(for ice cream.) She said that she was happily married, yet her husband did not do enough to satisfy her sexually. She had heard, she said, that I was interested in her, and since she was interested in me, she invited to be her boyfriend, with benefits and no strings attached. She said her husband was knowledgeable of what she was doing and approved.

Well, duh. She was pretty hot and what was I to do? Here was free sex, with no strings attached. She was cute, yet boyish. So couldn't I get past the feminine part?

So, I went with her to my apartment. We smoked a joint together, and then...

Well, that's where you get to finish the story. Remember, I was young, single, and horny...and opportunities like this did not come along often. She was no longer my student, having intentionally waited until classes were over to make her proposition. So, next, we...

[Guest lurkerspeaks]

of course, my response is strictly my personal beliefs.. I am not imposing them on anyone or judging anyone...

I am not so sure I would believe her when she said that her husband knew of her "desire to stray". I would have let her know I was flattered but I do not get involved when there is a serious relationship in place. As intriguing and alluring as she (the sitution) might be, I couldn't help but think what if I was the husband who's partner was cheating on me.

[Guest Oliver]

... So, next, we ...

Screwed like rabbits for the next three hours ... and then ...

[Guest gcursor]

Now I want everybody to be aware that THIS is only MY opinion and nobody else's. What people want to do with their life is up to them and them alone.

Based on the situation you described, I would have turned her away.

Gcursor

[MsGuy]

Rewind the scenario back to "I asked if this as business or pleasure...she responded: whatever you want it to be."

This is the proper point for a polite "thank you but no thank you."

[Guest CharliePS]

...and then, I became so liberated by the weed, that I suggested she call her husband and have him join us. Horrified, she grabbed her things and fled, and I never heard from her again.

[MsGuy]

...and then, I became so liberated by the weed, that I suggested she call her husband and have him join us. Horrified, she grabbed her things and fled, and I never heard from her again.

hahahahahaha

[caeron]

If I were Bi, and thought she was hot, I would have screwed her, provided I knew that we would not cross paths professionally again (no chance of her becoming a student again).

She may be lying to you, but that's her business as far as I'm concerned. You don't need to project any values onto her relationship with her husband.

Of course, that may be colored by the fact that I'm married to a woman and am gay. My wife has known since forever that I was a faggot. We were friends in college and finally figured out that we were soul mates, we just didn't want to fuck. So we got married, are very happy, and I look elsewhere for sex.

The idea that everyone out there has these white picket fence monogamy relationships is bullshit, and I don't think it is other people's business how people attend to that part of their relationship. Take care of your own, and let other people take care of theirs.

[Guest lurkerspeaks]

I agree that each couple can make their own rules for their relationship.. Whatever works for them...I just personally know that for me, I don't like the idea, and I am a big believer in karma. Now if I knew for a fact that both parties were ok with the liason, then I would probably consider it. Likewise, if it was a threeway with both partners, then I would go for it.. But unless I knew for a fact that both partners agreed, I would always feel like there was some "cheating going on" and that "what comes around goes around"... again.. JUST MY 2 CENTS WORTH

[Lucky]

Okay.We smoked the joint and engaged in small talk. When that was over, the moment of truth came. All the while I had been waging this battle in my head. I had had sex with many women, but not since I finally had sex with a guy. Once I had no choice but to go to the bedroom or send her home, I sent her home. I assured her that I thought she was very attractive, but that my old fashioned beliefs just couldn't let me have sex with a married woman. They still can't! She was gracious about it and I never heard from her again.

[TotallyOz]

I think an open relationship is much more common than we think. Many people get bored after a certain time with their partners and when they need sexual satisfaction, I see no reason not to explore other partners.

I like sex and even today if a beautiful lady approached me with the same scenario and we had some weed high, I'll love to have sex with her. Mind you, I get lazy when I smoke so she would have to be on top and do most of the work. If she was OK with that, I'd be OK with whatever happened.

(Notice I said in another thread today I hate drugs. I don't consider weed one of those drugs I hate.)

[TotallyOz]

What are the cons of having a friend with benefits?

[Guest CharliePS]

My guess is that the reason Lucky's student wasn't sexually satisfied was because the men she was attracted to were always closeted gays. I wonder if her (ex?)husband is here, too.

[Lucky]

Now, now, CharliePS. Just like there are young gay nymphomaniacs, there are young straight ones too! Many of have had some wild sex lives, why shouldn't she?

[Guest CharliePS]

I actually had a somewhat similar experience a number of years ago. I was traveling in Central America with a female friend, and we became friendly with a married couple our age in our tour group. A few months later, the wife contacted me and said she was going to be in my city and would like to get together, which we did. She then told me that her marriage was unsatisfying, she was strongly attracted to me, and wanted us to go to bed. I explained to her that, although I was not in a relationship with the friend I had been traveling with, I was in fact quite thoroughly gay, but she said she didn't care. So we did it, but before we started, I said, "Remember, Harriet: this is your fantasy, not mine." As I expected, it was not the fulfillment she had hoped for, and she went back to her husband.

[RA1]

Sounds like reasonable "therapy" to me. Perhaps you have a second career as a marriage counseler?

Best regards,

RA1