Overweight Clients & Escorts & Alternatives

[Guest FourAces]

As someone who is extremely overweight I have had mixed results with escorts.

Now before any escorts begin to bash me I want to mention there are some where my weight truly is not an issue. I do appreciate those of you who do not have a problem with guys my size. However I believe you are also in the minority.

When I contact a escort I am upfront about everything so that includes my size. What surprises me is several things. first how many non responses I receive. I would much more have respect for someone who took 30 seconds to send me a email saying it will not work (more on this in a minute). Then there those who for some reason need a picture as if they have never send what a fat person looks like, wtf. I even have had guys want to charge me more because I am fat .. a fat tax set by escorts? Lastly my favorite is so just how big are you replies even though I put my weight in the email.

I give huge thumbs up for the escort who responds with I do not feel I am the right person for you. I do not feel I can provide a fun time. Whether it be someones ethic background, looks, age, weight I feel that an escort who takes a minute to explain why and politely says no is a true pro.

Now even though I go through my weight situation in the emails and sometimes as a reminder in follow up emails .. when I meet the escort face to face I can see some are shocked. Like I can almost hear them say he is huge should I just leave.... but the ones who actually read my email usually deliver up an awesome time.

BUT WAIT THERE IS MORE!

There are legit and free alternatives. There are sites that cater to overweight guys and those who get off on their size. The biggest issue I have with these sites are depending on your location there are not many college age studs if any to try to meet. Obviously the large cities like NYC andLA or SF have the majority of these guys.

Also, I have found Craigslist to mostly be a good friend. I do a post making certain I mention my size and again meet guys who are more turned on by a heavyset man.

Of course this would all not be my first choice. I much rather get this weight off as it would make my life easier .. more comfortable.

Any other overweight guys run into like issues?

[Lucky]

Issues like this...well, there is a guy at the gym who used to escort. In his ad, he stated: "No Asians."

Is that just being honest, saving the Asian client from a bad time? Or is he just a bigot? Hard to say.

Like many other minorities, overweight people, or people of a large size, are also not understood by those who have no experience with the same. Assuming a person is clean, then his weight should not matter, at least to an escort who is providing services for money.

The reason for the qualifier is that we all have our tastes, the flip of which is to say that we all have our biases. Many of us were raised to scorn those who are different. When we realized that we ourselves were different, it became, for some, an educational tool to understand the differences in others.

Nonetheless, I have particular and maybe peculiar tastes. I am not at all attracted to hairy white men, most likely because that is what I am. I like the more exotic, smooth-skinned brown guys. Try as I might, I can't change my tastes. However, having had the opportunity to have sex with an overweight smooth-skinned brown guy, I went for it, and found him just as fun as anybody else.

One other bias is against older guys. Many, if not most, young guys don't even see us as potential sex partners. I was the same way when I was young, so I can't fault them.

Four Aces, thanks for sharing your experiences. Hopefully you have found the way to a healthy sex life.

[JKane]

I've been kind of surprised how many other posters have posted they're also large (or used to be) of late. But I don't suppose I should be, when we used to have the hooville gatherings (and the later Rentboy ones) there were usually at least 2 large people, often 3 at the gatherings. Out of 6-10 clients. So it can't be that rare for escorts to encounter, and the trend is ever-increasing...

Maybe some of the escorts Aces mentioned who had a problem with his size are so thin because they can't afford to eat--only taking business from guys with similar bodies to theirs!

Personally I can't remember having a bad time with a guy I was paying because of my size. I don't often go the reviewed/rentboy route but when I have I don't think I made mention of my size either. I usually do mention it with craigslist-type encounters, I suppose a few have fell through but not that memorably.

As for alternates to hiring, I've tried bearwww and gotten together with 5 or 6 guys over the last 3-4 years. Mixed experiences, nothing too memorable except the one that got clingy right away, seemed one more fuck from becoming a stalker (he still sends me messages through that site when we're on at the same time). But even in LA it's obviously not swimming with hot guys who can't wait to get with me, especially ones who I'm attracted to (like Lucky I'm not sexually into other guys who look like me). Often the hottest guys on there are elsewhere in California. So many in Long Beach/Orange county! Damn it!

What other sites have people tried, and how well did they work?

Anybody have any luck at bars or such? I specifically went to MJ's during a bears and bellies event but don't really know how to approach guys in that kind of social situation, not that I noticed anybody noticing me.

One thing I've wondered, are we so used to being ignored by the WeHo clones that we can't even tell if somebody is interested?

There are many good reasons to lose weight, but I don't think doing it to attract WeHo clones (or snooty escorts) is one. Then you'll have loose skin, or be too hairy, or bald, or old, or whatever...

Since I've lost some weight I did have one encounter (from bearwww) where the guy showed up and wasn't attracted to me because I wasn't fat enough! I suppose as endings to encounters go that's not too bad...

[Lucky]

Now how did the guy express that? "Sorry, you are too skinny for me?"

[Guest FourAces]

Now how did the guy express that? "Sorry, you are too skinny for me?"

A few times on one of the big guy sites I have had guys tell me they want me to gain more weight. Also when I tell guys I am trying to lose weight, on these sites, they tend to disappear on me quickly. I guess its a fetish for some to be with a really fat guy.

Like you mentioned we all have preferences and to go outside of those is not as easy as it sounds. But the same can be applied to most preferences we have .. we like pizza we don't like pizza or we prefer blue shirts or we don't like blue shirts.

I am sure if the price was right many of these escorts would give it a go. I am not willing to pay a premium fee for my weight. Its bad enough airlines charge fat people for two seats ... or people think you are weak and have no will power. Hey I quit smoking 30 years ago I quit drinking 30 years ago .. I just haven't been able to quit eating. Maybe I should start smoking and drinking again :lol:

[Guest zipperzone]

Issues like this...well, there is a guy at the gym who used to escort. In his ad, he stated: "No Asians."

Is that just being honest, saving the Asian client from a bad time? Or is he just a bigot? Hard to say.

I agree - it is hard to say. I have a similar problem. There is one particular race that I am simply not attracted to. Some would probably call me a racist but I don't think that is the case. I have nothing against them, will gladly socialize with them, welcome them as a friend - but I just can't get a hard-on with them. I call it chemistry.

[JKane]

Now how did the guy express that? "Sorry, you are too skinny for me?"

Pretty much exactly. But he did want to be friends, just not sexually attracted. One fetish I'll probably never understand is 'gainers' and their admirers... as I understand it's somebody supporting somebody else getting as fat as possible.

I was thinking, maybe I haven't had much problem because I'm a selfish top--especially when it comes to hiring.

I guess if you require an escort to be rock hard and particularly to cum then their preferences might have more import...

Don't get me wrong though, I enjoy when an escort is into a session and cums all over as I fuck him, but I don't expect or require it.

[Guest CharliePS]

I think a successful escort is someone who is attracted to individuals rather than types. Before you say, but we are all attracted to specific types, let me explain: to some extent, we all have our biases, but for some guys they are more limiting than others. Although there are certain physical characteristics that always attract my attention, I have never been attracted to ONLY those types. In fact, if you showed me a huge range of photos of men, you would be hard put to define the commonalities between those I would pick out as desirable, and between those I reject. Age, height, weight, race, body type, hairyness/smoothness, etc., would be all over the board. Most of the time I couldn't tell you why I chose one heavy guy over another, a little guy and a big guy, a red-haired muscle builder and a skinny black guy, and on and on. In a bear bar, two guys whose superficial description would be identical would have totally different effects on me. Even the type that interests me most can change from one stage of my life to another, and even from day to day.

That said, I wouldn't make a good escort, because if an individual doesn't turn me on, there is no way I can get excited, whereas I believe the best escort can find something about the individual (his hairy calves, his big ears, his smell, the shape of his cock, etc.) to fetishize for the duration of the appointment.

[RA1]

Do you think it is possible he is thinking of "another"? Are his eyes closed?

Best regards,

RA1

[RodHagen]

Read the reviews closely. I have been with clients over 400 pounds and we have a great time!

[RA1]

If the 400 pound comment was directed to me, I don't think I suggested two people might not have a good time regardless of "private" thoughts. Let's compare it to traveling around the world. I have been many places that I would not choose to live or even necessarily spend much time, BUT, I don't ever recall being some place that I could not find "something" good to experience or notice about it.

I think you are suggesting attitude is everything and I whole-heartedly agree.

Best regards,

RA1

[Guest NeedSome]

I don't get the argument that you're a racist if you don't prefer to have sex with a person of certain ethnic background. If you can be labeled a racist because you don't want to have sex with an asian guy, does that also make you a misogynist because you don't like having sex with women? And I don't see how this is any different for escorts than for us regular joes. If an escort can't get it up with a person of a certain background, best he say so in order to avoid a poor performance because he can't see past the guys' skin color (or weight, or height, whatever). I would never hold that against him, but I would hold it against him if he showed up and couldn't get it up because, I don't know, he doesn't like light skinned guys with salt and pepper hair and he didn't have the wherewithal to say so up front and we had a lame sessions.

I do feel a little differently about a guy's look though. If the guy is butt ugly, the escort should still be able to fake it. If not, then a leather hood works wonders...but I still send a description and usually a picture to escorts anyway. I figured it's best if they know what they are getting themselves into so that they can run for the hills if necessary. Besides, I prefer that their initial look of shock and horror happen at the computer screen and not when I open the front door.

[Keenan Smith]

Escorting is a job and as such not every day is the best for the escort. Some clients will be better than others. As for me I will accept anyone no questions asked. Since the client chose me I prefer to give them the best time possible rather then turn them down.

Keenan

[BiBottomBoy]

I think if the escort is a bottom weight, race whatever shouldn't matter, because you can lube your hole and close your eyes for anyone.

On the other hand I think it's completely reasonable for a top to state preferences since the entire encounter is based on his ability to get it up adn keep it up and if certain types of guys make it hard for him to get hard, then it's going to be a bad experience for both customer and escort and should therefore be avoided.

[RA1]

We are all human beings and "personal preference" is not JUST racial or body weight or cultural or religious or educational bias, it can be something that is so deeply ingrained that it might as well be genetical in basis. Otherwise, it is "cultural upbringing", more or less. I suspect we cannot always account for deep seated reasons to not "like" someone else. But, the superior person will continue to try.

Best regards,

RA1

[msclelovr]

I'm a guy in late middle age and I enjoy having an affectionate time with, including getting sucked by and topping, good-looking muscled young men. I happen to go the gym and stay in shape, and I'm tall and lean.

Recently, I met an attractive young man online. We chatted and exchanged photos before we met. Once we did meet, he was polite but he explained that I just wasn't his type. He told me I was handsome and explained that tho he's into sexually pleasing an older man, he only likes overweight and fat older man. He pointed out critically that I don't have a big belly. It seems.that to him a big belly is erotic.

So it takes all sorts, whether hiring or not.

[Guest submachine]

I'd think overweight clients wouldn't be as big an issue as an overweight escort (then again what do I know).

The escort isn't gonna get much business if he just wants sex with the hottest thing out there (better off being a client).

The client wants the best for his money, whatever that entails.

I'm curious, how many overweight escorts are there? Do they do good business?

[Lucky]

I'd think overweight clients wouldn't be as big an issue as an overweight escort (then again what do I know).

The escort isn't gonna get much business if he just wants sex with the hottest thing out there (better off being a client).

The client wants the best for his money, whatever that entails.

I'm curious, how many overweight escorts are there? Do they do good business?

Hey, submachine, welcome to the forums. Not sure what to make of your name, but hopefully we won't need body armor!

[Guest FourAces]

Escorting is a job and as such not every day is the best for the escort. Some clients will be better than others. As for me I will accept anyone no questions asked. Since the client chose me I prefer to give them the best time possible rather then turn them down.

Keenan

That is a really pro attitude toward your potential clients. I wish you the best.