Guest noy9000 Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 I'm wondering what this mean, the boy (I'm serious with him, and he didn't know it yet) is eager to bring me back to know his folks. Is it an act that he is serious? or it'll be easier for him to ask money from me in the future... for the family? I don't know. Please advise on the possible reasons that he'll like me to know his family. Quote
Guest Silom Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 Could you say more about the boy? Is he a barboy or freelancer moneyboy or none of that? Is he a village boy or a middle class person? Quote
Guest noy9000 Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 Could you say more about the boy? Is he a barboy or freelancer moneyboy or none of that? Is he a village boy or a middle class person? Close to being a village boy, not to intelligent, short-attention span; but we'd been through alot for the past 2 years, together/ separation for many times. Not too rich though, I'm still guessing why - he's interested to bring me back to meet his folks. Quote
Guest Silom Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 If he has been your bf for two years it is about time you get to meet the family. You will go upcountry to meet them in the province he is from? It will be an adventure. Enjoy it. I asked if he was a working boy or not because if he was you could be one in a line of foreigners to be taken to meet the parents, with pro boys knowing how to bond with foreigners. ("I even went to his village! This must be the real thing!") Whatever happens keep smiling, bring gifts and don't stay too long. Quote
Gaybutton Posted May 25, 2007 Posted May 25, 2007 I doubt that anyone but the boy himself can really give you the reasons for it. There are no standards by which to judge because so many people have gone to meet the families for any number of reasons. He might be serious about you and he might not. He might simply miss his family and you're the one who is going to pay his way to get there. He might elevate his status by having a "farang," just as if you are a commodity. He might simply want you to meet his family because he likes you. In other words, anybody's guess could be the right guess. You have known him for quite some time. What does your gut feeling tell you? Unless he has done things in the past to give you a reason to suspect some sort of sinister reason, then I'd say to give him the benefit of the doubt and have a nice time. Going to a boy's home town and spending time with the family has been the highlight of the trip for many people. I agree with Silom about giving gifts. The way I would do it would be to give the boy whatever amount you wish to spend on gifts, and I wouldn't make it more than one or two-thousand baht, and let him choose what to bring them. One time I made a trip to Laos with my boyfriend and one of his Laotian friends. His friend wanted to bring gifts for his mother. Do you know what he wanted to bring? Laundry detergent and fish sauce. I asked him what kind of gift is that to give to a woman, especially his mother. But that's what he wanted to give her and she was absolutely delighted (or she was one hell of a good actress). In other words, let the boy be the one who decides what gifts to bring. You are going to be expected to foot the bill for everything once you are there. That includes paying for the family if you go out to dinner somewhere. Quite often they want to throw a party "in your honor." Guess who pays for that. Be careful if anyone starts talking about a party. It can get quite expensive. It is common for just about everyone they know to be invited and some of the people who get invited don't have any qualms about bringing some of their own friends along. When the whiskey and food starts running low, you'll be expected to pay for more. The way around those kinds of things is to make it clear to the boy, before you go, what you do and do not want to happen. I would also make it clear that if he wants you to do or pay for anything you didn't know about in advance, then take you aside and speak to you privately. Quite often "farang" are asked right in front of the very people the boy is talking about. That makes it quite difficult to say no. If you don't object to the party, which is very likely to occur, then tell the boy how much you are willing to spend on it and that you won't pay one baht more. Tell him that if you are going to take the family out to dinner, that's the immediate family, and not all the cousins, aunts, uncles, and Lord-knows-who. The trick is to make all these things clear before you go. Otherwise you can really get stuck. Quote
