Shopping Spree

[TotallyOz]

All good things must come to an end. Hedda asked in another post when my spending spree was going to stop. Well, it has stopped. I have finished. Elvis has left the building so to speak and as his ring said TCB. That is what I did. I took care of business.

 

I had several boys living with me for a long time. My main rules are, no other farang, no lies and no yabba. If they follow those rules, other things are no problem.

 

Living in the lap of a luxurious home, I had a great life. A swimming pool. Tons of boys. Many farang friends. It was a good life. A few nights ago, that life came to a halt. I found out that all but one of my boys had been doing Yabba. I was stunned. I was sad. Not only was this my major rule for anyone staying with me, it was also something that could have landed me in major trouble. I do not want to be anywhere near that stuff. Why did I let all this happen? Stupidity. Not anyone

[Guest xstreamlove]

I am sorry for you pain and the loss of your flock. I also have had bad luck with Thai guys as they all seem to turn out to be liars to me. I have yet to find one who did not lie to me and find this very discouraging.

 

I think you have been more then good to these guys and have gone above and beyond what most would do for them. The most painful part I think for me would be how they did not appreciate all you had done for them. With that said I think boys will be boys too, when I was there age I would tend to party also. I have worked for years as a drug and alcohol counselor and work closely with adults, teens and even pre teens. I would think that drugs and alcohol are also a part of the social surroundings as they are here in the US. From what I understand yaba is the same thing a crystal meth (maybe im wrong) but this also very popular here in the US and has replaced crack and cocaine because it is allot cheaper with longer effects.

 

I would thing you would just benefit more if you had say maybe one live in guy or bf and just off the others when you felt the need. Then again I don

[Guest xstreamlove]

Ps:

I also forgot to mention that it is better for you to cut your ties now as you have.

Drug addiction will almost always lead to illegal actions such as theft thus

placing yourself in a possible legal nightmare if these boys are living with you.

The more these boys become addicted the more they will start doing mindless actions

without ever thinking twice. They will go to any means to feed there on going addiction.

In most cases they will bring down everything and everyone in there path with out being able to control it.

 

If I was you I would consider myself lucky to have discovered this at its early stage

before things got out of control and caused you life changing problems.

 

Best wishes on you holiday and bring me back a few Latin lovers.

 

[Guest francois]

We will miss you!

Bon Voyage.

[firecat69]

Sorry Gay Thailand. Big Hearts always get hurt the hardest and you have one of the biggest hearts.

 

But what is life with out its ups and downs. The downs remind you of how good it is when you have something or someone to be up about.

 

I know you will have many more good adventures and many boys will be the better off for meeeting you and you for them.

 

The Heart always has a way of repairing itself and be strong for the next Love of your Life or the dissapointments that may occur.

 

Thinking of you!!!!

[Guest Hedda]

"All good things come to an end."

 

You might perhaps recall that statement when you are tempted to turn this short story into the threatened internet novella. I cringe at the thought that LMTU, who I suppose passes as Sawatdee's literary scion these days, is already at work on his keyboard sledgehammer creating high drama through the suspenseful use of no punctuation. (When will this sentence end ?)

 

Just remember when you get tempted to gild your bruised lily with more details, that most expats or frequent visitors to Thailand have probably slept through the same dream turned nightmare that you have just experienced. The only thing different between you and most of us is that you did it on a much grander scale. . .and aren't ashamed to admit it.

 

No doubt you are baffled by the inability of these young men to honor the few simple conditions you placed on their stay in paradise. How could anyone be so stupid to throw it all away ! Well, if Adam and Eve did it for one bite of a lousy apple, the Thai guy who left with the Ipod did a lot better.

 

The real question you have to answer is not about the Thai guys who were fooilsih enough to self-destruct. You'll never figure that one out. What you have to decide is whether the ride was worth the fall - FOR YOU ! Let us know if you find the answer to that question in Barcelona. I found mine in a Pattaya bar.

[Gaybutton]

Hedda, as in most cases, says it best. I agree with him. I also agree with all the posts that have thus far appeared here in response to your story.

 

As you know, Gay Thailand, I am one of the people aware of the full story. There are aspects of it, in my opinion, that would be best kept private. Unfortunately, it isn't just boys such as these who cannot be trusted. There are just too many people who read and post on these boards who salivate, waiting for any opportunity to take an aspect of someone else's unfortunate experiences, and then post absolute nonsense as if it were fact. I think anyone who has been around these boards very long knows that I too have been a victim of that sort of posting more than once. I hope you won't let that happen to you. You have suffered enough.

 

I do think, however, it is a positive thing for you to have purged your soul and told your story. I think it will open the eyes of many "farang" and be of enormous help to others who otherwise would have fallen into the same trap. I have a feeling the vast majority of "farang" who have spent much time in Thailand and became involved in relationships ended up in bitter disappointment at least once. I hear too many "farang" say something to the effect of, "Maybe a lot of the boys are like that, but not this boy." Famous last words. You were with five boys. The odds were stacked against you from the beginning.

 

I do not wish to imply that all Thai boys fit into this sort of stereotype. Many do and many don't. Many are perfectly trustworty, honest and sincere and would no more involve themselves with drugs than you or I would. I can cite many examples of that. For those of you who knew 'David-in-Pattaya,' for one example; his boyfriend stuck with him and was absolutely devoted to him throughout his illness and took wonderful "beyond the call of duty" care of him until the day he died. The boy asked for and expected nothing in return. It was what he wished to do. There are many boys who are like that. The trick is finding them.

 

To my mind, the way one has to handle it, especially at first, is to check up on every damned thing they are told by these boys. Over time, one can move toward one of the few things Ronald Reagan said with which I agree . . . "Trust, but verify." For me, I would have to be with a boy for at least two years before I could feel completely secure. I have learned that the best thing to do is simply get rid of the boy at the first sign of trouble. If that is something emotionally impossible for some to do, including me, then at least keep a strict eye on everything that is going on and don't be afraid to end the relationship if you become fed up enough with it.

 

It truly is mind boggling to try to understand why so many of these boys end up killing the goose that is laying their golden egg for them. Many lie about things they never needed to lie about in the first place. All most "farang" ask, in return for their kindness, is the same as Gay Thailand asked of his boys. And yet they took the risk and threw it all away. It doesn't matter whether it makes sense to us or not. Enough boys behave in that manner that one has to be prepared for that possibility. The worst mistake "farang" make is looking at a money boy through rose-colored glasses.

 

We've all heard our share of horror stories and happy ending stories. The truly sad thing is we seem to hear more horror stories than anything else.

[Guest Martelly]

Gaythailand, dont give up on land of smiles. We have all been there before.

 

My first boyfriend took me for a lot and i mean alot. Then i discovered as you the Yabba. I was devistated. I too packed up and left Thailand.

 

It wasnt till 3 or 4 months after that i received an email from a Thai friend asking me to come back to Pattaya. As life in the Uk had not been much better i thought i would give it 1 last go.

 

Now i have been back in Thailand 7 years. I have been more than happy with the same boyfriend. There are good thai men out there and im sure you will find someone soon.

[TotallyOz]

The real question you have to answer is not about the Thai guys who were fooilsih enough to self-destruct. You'll never figure that one out. What you have to decide is whether the ride was worth the fall - FOR YOU ! Let us know if you find the answer to that question in Barcelona. I found mine in a Pattaya bar.

 

I don't need to wait for that answer. Yes, the ride was worth the fall. I had an amazing time. Perhaps the best time of my life. Life is like a roller coaster. It has it ups and downs. I love the ups and the downs are always tolerable as I know there is another up coming up soon. I love the ride.

 

[TotallyOz]

As you know, Gay Thailand, I am one of the people aware of the full story. There are aspects of it, in my opinion, that would be best kept private. Unfortunately, it isn't just boys such as these who cannot be trusted. There are just too many people who read and post on these boards who salivate, waiting for any opportunity to take an aspect of someone else's unfortunate experiences, and then post absolute nonsense as if it were fact. I think anyone who has been around these boards very long knows that I too have been a victim of that sort of posting more than once. I hope you won't let that happen to you. You have suffered enough.

 

When someone posts something personal, it is always open to the public's bitchy nature. In Thailand, I think there are more bitches that frequent the boards than in most places. I think this board is an exception. We have a good place where people can come and share information. I love the fast that I can get good information on Thailand, without the nasty queens coming out to moan and groan. If you take a look at the other board, they are already on the attack. Some people really do love to see others misery. I am not one of those people. I never want to see another farang or boy unhappy or in a hurtful situation. There are those that really love to see me in pain. Fuck em.

 

I may not post the most personal details as I did in this post too often in the future as I have said I would not do this again. But, after I got an e-mail from LMTU, I knew the day after there were many talking and rumors floating about. I wanted to stop the gossip from those who did not know what was happening and tried to stop the fire instead of allowing it to burn. Otherwise, I would not have made this post at all. Perhaps a little restraint in my next big post will be observed.

 

GayButton has always given me good advice and Hedda reminds me of my mother. She doesn't always say what you want to hear but is usually right. I think some of her past posts predicted this was about to come. As I said before, I had a great time. As I said on another board, I still care for these guys and hope to be friendly with them. Not a client again, but on friendly terms. I wish them best of luck.

 

 

Gaythailand, dont give up on land of smiles. We have all been there before.

 

I have NOT given up on the Land of Smiles. I love it there. I tend to have a pattern with all boyfriends. When I break up, I leave the country for a few weeks or months. I do this not to get away from them but to allow them to move on with their life and get started into a new routine. I gave every boy that left a kiss and told them goodbye. I hope I left on good enough terms to be friendly with them in the future.

 

I did not leave for good. I just left for a while. They needed a break from me and I needed a break from them. Since I have a few million frequent flyer miles, it is easy for me to fly away and take a vacation. That is what I did.

[Guest Hedda]

"Yes, the ride was worth the fall. I had an amazing time. Perhaps the best time of my life. Life is like a roller coaster. It has it ups and downs. I love the ups and the downs are always tolerable as I know there is another up coming up soon. I love the ride."

 

Glad to hear that, but I don't know why you had to flee to Barcelona if you feel that way. Admit it, you hate the rainy season here in Siam and just used this epidode as an excuse to escape to sunny Iberia, while the rain in Spain falls here.

 

Seriously, the internet is about the worst place to share your private thoughts among strangers, most of whom could care less about your ups and downs. Personally, I find it uncomfortable to read these true confessions by exhibitionists and dodgers who seem to think that the intimate details of their love life are best experienced by hanging them out to dry on the web.

 

It's just as depressing to realize that there are some guys whose emotional life must be so desolate that they can't wait to splash the last drops of theirs or your private pain onto the world's virtual sidewalks. As for the nerds who responded, in essence, that you got what you deserved, they are probably green with envy that they didn't get to take the ride.

 

Granted, you may have set yourself for some grief by publicizing your Farouk-lifetsyle in Shitsville when things were riding high, but your decision to "go public" just to anticipate the catcalls from the jealous rabble was foolish too. When you open those private flood gates, dear, you can expect all sorts of garbage to float in.

[TotallyOz]

Granted, you may have set yourself for some grief by publicizing your Farourk-lifetsyle in Shitsville when things were riding high, but your decision to "go public" just to anticipate the catcalls from the jealous rabble was foolish too. When you open those private flood gates, dear, you can expect all sorts of garbage to float in.

 

I think I have read writing like this before. Were your ashes just shot out of a cannon? JK

 

Thanks for the advice. Well worded and heeded.

Glad to hear that, but I don't know why you had to flee to Barcelona if you feel that way. Admit it, you hate the rainy season here in Siam and just used this epidode as an excuse to escape to sunny Iberia, while the rain in Spain falls here.

 

When I had a 5 year lover that I broke up with in NYC, I took a trip. I told my mother that I felt like I was running away from my problems. She said, "perhaps you are not running away as much as you are running toward something new." That stuck with me. That is what I did.,

 

OK. Plus, I love the Spanish guys and I love Barcelona in the summer and have spent a lot of time there and the trip was desired.

[Gaybutton]

I agree with Hedda, that it is a mistake to publish too much about your private affairs, none of which is anyone's business but your own. I do, however, think that it is helpful to others to know the gist of what happened so that they, especially if they are newbies, can see the kinds of things that can and do happen here and perhaps avoid falling into a similar trap.

 

One thing that has kind of stuck with me since reading it in your first post is that you received E-mail from people who want to take these boys "off" themselves. I find that truly remarkable. You just let everyone know that these boys turned out to be liars, cheaters, and drug users, who also didn't show even the remotest gratitude even when you gave them so much at the end after their deplorable behavior. So, these idiots want to "off" these very same boys? Are they kidding?

 

That just boggles my mind. I'm beginning to believe that the clich

[Guest xstreamlove]

I can only say thank you GayThailand for being open and honest about your personal life.

I am a newbie and do find this forum helpful with information on the does and don

[Guest freeyourmind]

I always wondered who this guy was that walked around with a half a dozen guys on his heels. I am not jealous in the least, but I am in awe. Hell, I have a difficult time just dating one Thai guy at a time. To each his own.

 

I do thank you for sharing your story and I wish you happiness wherever you go. I am jealous of the fact that you have the means of traveling where and when you chose. I wish I could travel the world but I am stuck in Pattaya with an annual trip home most years.

 

I hope the newbies (including myself) will truly try to understand what you went through and what you learned with your post and future posts. I personally look forward to reading what you experienced and felt with this very interesting situation, if you decide to share all with us.

 

Best Regards,

 

fym