The Road Less Traveled

[TotallyOz]

Since being back in the states in a small town for a few months visiting with relatives and dating a very much older man, I have had many of my perspectives changed.

First, I came out when I was in my late 20’s and it was a very easy process for me. I think there are many that went before me that made my Coming Out easier for me. I hope that my generation has made it even easier for younger gays to Come Out. From what I see and what I read, it is easier now and continues to be easier.

When I was young, I had several guys who were gay and we were sex buddies. They were very active in sexual actively with me all through our teenage years and early college days. I moved away and went away to school on the East Coast. Most stayed near their home. When I returned to visit with family, EVERY one of them are now married and have children and live a straight life. I did not want to bring up history with them but I have always been very curious if it was just a phase or if it was more. I got my answer when I went to a local diner where several of my openly gay friends were there and invited me. Low and behold, those who are now married were there with the group as well.

They all had pretty much the same story. They are married; they go to church and can’t live an openly gay life. They spend a week or two or many weekends a year in NYC, LA, or Vegas and try to get their gay desires out of their system so they can go back to their family. While I do understand this, I guess it also makes me a bit sad. I am so happy that I made the decision to live an openly gay life and to stop the lies I had told for years. I know of others on this board that have made the same life change.

Yesterday, I hooked up with a guy from my gym. He was looking like a Greek god. He was so hot. He was about 35 years old, solid muscles, very handsome and model looks. We chatted in the locker room and then played a bit in the steam room. We exchanged numbers and I was looking forward to seeing him again. When I left the gym, I saw him taking his wife and 3 children from the pool area. My jaw dropped. He smiled as if I should have known and it was nothing to him. I smiled and my heart sank.

Which life is easier? Why are decisions so easy for some and impossible for others? Will time change this? Are the younger generations going down the same route or are they left with more choices?

[Guest marcanthony1]

Some people may be forced into this "dual" life, and others may even choose it. I can't tell you how many openly gay young guys on myspace write either "yes" , "someday", or "not sure" under the category "children".

[Guest RR]

OZ:

I can understand where you are coming from. However, it is impossible for some people to be openly gay. For instance, in my culture is not accepted and even for someone who is truly bisexual they face great pains and social issues.

For me personally, I love my wife and kids and would do anything for them. The fact that I have a preference for guys also is something that will never go away. The perfect world for me would be to have a wife and a husband! Not many people would agree to that female or male; so I do what works for me.

I enjoy the clubs, the trips, the boys, and then I come home and give my family what it needs. They need a husband and a father not just a breadwinner.

RussianRob

[TotallyOz]

>so I do what works for me.

Thanks for the input. It really does makes sense to me. I understand all your said. I do wonder if future generations will not have to choose?

I agree with doing what works. I sometimes like a lady but it is very rare and most of my attraction is toward guys. However, the occassinal fling works for me very well.

[Guest RR]

>

>Thanks for the input. It really does makes sense to me. I

>understand all your said. I do wonder if future generations

>will not have to choose

>

>I agree with doing what works. I sometimes like a lady but it

>is very rare and most of my attraction is toward guys.

>However, the occassinal fling works for me very well.

I do hope too that future generations will not have to choose. Society have come a long way in my opinion from the days past. Unfortunetly it it has SO much farther to go.

Flings are always good! I have one last night

RussianRob