Bangkok Trip Report: To Butterfly or not to Butterfly Part 2 – The Devil and the Angel

[vinapu]

I wonder why Numazu insists only taking boys from the bars and doesn't try his luck through the apps like Romeo, Grindr or other Thai dating ones.

BurBoy is not a bar boy.

 

I second what samebb said above , in bars you meet real people in 3 dimensions and nothing beats having ability to get closer to your intended off.

 

Like Rush of Bangkokbois blog fame once exclaimed ' placing hand on boy's leg is responsible for more offs than all mamasans and smiles together".

[spoon]

Plus they are some fake profile in the apps, or overly photoshopped pics, and of course some apps dont allow for nudity pics too. Not to mention the language barrier one might have from the app. In the bar, u can even ask mamasan to translate for you, u see exactly what is on offer, and can even rely on the bar to give u some sort of guarantee of bog performance, especially if u are a regular there.

[GWMinUS]

Want to apologize to everyone for posting the suggestion that we find an actor to play Numazu in this new movie.

It was mean in FUN but did not go over so well...

Anyway, on with the great stories!!!

[ChristianPFC]

I for one am glad Numazu doesn't sit in his room using only the apps. I have way to much fun spending time with him in Silom! Getting to experience much of these stories first hand.

 

Can you have a conversation there? I find it way too noisy, and the lights annoy me as well, to have a conversation in Silom Soi 4 or Soi Twilight. And when someone on the adjacent table starts to smoke, then I'm out!

[numazu]

Apps vs Bars

 

I wonder why Namzu insists only taking boys from the bars and doesn't try his luck through the apps like Romeo, Grindr or other Thai dating ones.

 

I use the gay apps all the time. Here at home and to other countries I visit. But they usually don't have what Bangkok has in abundance: gogo bars. When on the apps I usually don't pay for sex. The gogos in Bangkok obviously I have to pay, but it is part of the "entertainment" cost I incur when I am in Bangkok. As you can probably guess I try to get as much entertainment value as I can from the offs.

 

In my earlier Bangkok trips I have used the apps quite a bit, and have had some success with it. I have talked about meeting some good free ones (and one bad one) in this trip report. As samebb has said, the quality is mixed. Now that I have my pseudo-Grindr boy BurBoy, I have no need to find anyone else. I'll just stick to gogos to "supplement" my boy fix every holiday.

 

I for one am glad Numazu doesn't sit in his room using only the apps. I have way to much fun spending time with him in Silom! Getting to experience much of these stories first hand.

 

Thanks man for being the Ultimate Wingman™. Hopefully I don't look all crazy to you when we hangout. Its one thing to read about it, but its another to actually see it. 

Can you have a conversation there? I find it way too noisy, and the lights annoy me as well, to have a conversation in Silom Soi 4 or Soi Twilight. And when someone on the adjacent table starts to smoke, then I'm out!

 

Christian yes, we have full on conversations at Hot Male bar and Soi 4. We all had a lovely time catching up over last Songkran in Hot Male and there was 6 of us talking. I was also able to get to get to talk to samebb's companion The Lion at Soi 4, and he was Thai with this non-native english speaker skills. The lights are part of the ambiance, and smoking is just a fact of life there. Maybe bars are just not for you? It is definitely not for everyone.

 

Plus they are some fake profile in the apps, or overly photoshopped pics, and of course some apps dont allow for nudity pics too. Not to mention the language barrier one might have from the app. In the bar, u can even ask mamasan to translate for you, u see exactly what is on offer, and can even rely on the bar to give u some sort of guarantee of bog performance, especially if u are a regular there.

 

Couldn't have said it any better.

 

BurBoy is not a bar boy.

 

Love the pacing of the reports.

It's understood that the boys in a club talk about their customers. And that's a benefit is you receive a good grade. Bad grade = shun-vile.

I've personally learned that the boys from, say Vietnam, talk cross club. Last visit, my regular Van learned that I'd offed another Viet, Nuguyen, from Screwboys. All was not lost as Van decided to put the three of us together.

Why do I mention this...well, Numazu is hinting that he has intent to dazzle some boys from Myanmar but keep BurBoy out of the picture. All I can say is good luck.

 

So this is I guess one advantage of getting a boy from Grindr over the bars. The bar boys will talk about you of course, maybe this is to our benefit in the end. I talked about my week just hanging out at Boyzboyzboyz, offing one boy per night. By the fifth boy, I already got a boy fully briefed on what to say to me to get me, what to charge me, and in bed, what to do to please me. I've heard that at Dream Boy they even talk about certain customers who frequent the bar, as to how to approach them etc.

 

BurBoy is not a bar boy, as vinapu has said. His place of work is not in Silom, and he lives far far away in Chatuchak/Don Meaung area, with a roommate who is also not a gogo, and his friends are not gogos as well.  It could be possible that he can run into these Burmese boys at some point (maybe in Fake club as he loves this club), but the probability of them talking about me is minuscule. So there is no danger in a gogo boy blabbing to BurBoy about me. It hasn't happened yet, thank god.

[ChristianPFC]

Day 1.9: Advantage: numazu

 

Now tonight, with MonBoy having broken 2 promises this night (one to pick him at 12 midnight, and then finishing his off at 1 AM)...

 

We get to Silom and I look at him and I ask him with a calm but firm voice why he broke his promise in ending his off at 1 AM. He tells me, in really broken and nervous English that the customer was wanting to stay longer, and he was trying to leave. I tell him that I didn’t care about the other customer. I was waiting for him and he should honor his promises.

 

We get to Soi Thaniya and I get away from his death-gripped hug and start walking fast. He puts a hand on my shoulder to keep up with me and keep the contact alive. I take the hand and hold it. We stop in the middle of the Soi and I ask him: “Why you want me off you? You want have sex with customer angry you? No good for you!” He answers: “I OK you angry. I want go home with you. I make you happy OK?” I was persistent: “Sex no good angry OK. I want sleep alone. Why you want go with me angry?” Softly, but with determination, he says: “I like you. I want go home with you.”

 

For the first time since saying goodbye to him 4 hours ago, I smiled at him. I couldn’t help it. The way he said “I like you,” kind of was endearing. I say, half-laughing: “Why you like me? Cannot like me only see me little bit.” He then says: “I like you because you clean and cute.” I laugh again. He was really trying to sell it. I guess being called clean by a boy is a compliment. I tell him that I don’t know if I wanted to take him home, but right now I was going to Soi Twilight to meet back up with my friends. MonBoy tells me he will go with me.

 

Promises in Thailand are worth as much as the air that carries the sound.

 

I would not want to be that customer.

 

Do you really speak with him that way? It makes me cringe to read. Do the boy a favor and speak standard English with him.

[numazu]

Do you really speak with him that way? It makes me cringe to read. Do the boy a favor and speak standard English with him.

 

I customize my english cadence, vocabulary and way of speaking for maximum intelligibility best suited for the person I am speaking to. MonBoy is a new gogo boy and his english is not so good. With BurBoy I have learned how to speak "Myanmar english" for maximum intelligibility, and I used this to great success with MonBoy.

 

I can insist on speaking with BurBoy in my natural accent and way of speaking, but that will end up in a lot of confusion and repeats. BurBoy's english has vastly improved with hanging out with me and with his english lessons he is currently taking, and I adjust accordingly to his new skill level. I was in Mexico last week and if I spoke in my normal way it would be strange to them as well. When I was in the Philippines, where English is very prevalent, my normal way is also sometimes heard with confusion. 

[vinapu]

 

 

 

 

The bar boys will talk about you of course, maybe this is to our benefit in the end.

I find this gossiping beneficial as well and recall quite a few cases when boys briefed about  me by their friends went that extra mile / going long time with customer for first time ever, reducing their tip request after consulting  what I paid last boy etc. / 

 

Some of  specific are very detailed, one of BBB boys was briefed what side of bed I prefer and admitted to being instructed that he must shower with me because I like that and  informed that  he will be invited for a  breakfast in the morning.

 

Another Arena boy was told not tu turn TV in the room without asking me etc.

 

So if we think we are kind of unknowns while entering bar or massage it's not always exactly a case.

[vinapu]

Promises in Thailand are worth as much as the air that carries the sound.

 

 

While  your experience is zillion times bigger than mine, I'd wouldn't be that extreme and I was dealing couple times with boys extremely reliable including even one who knocked to my door at 10 p.m. on the dot as he promised day before. 

[1moRussian]

While  your experience is zillion times bigger than mine, I'd wouldn't be that extreme and I was dealing couple times with boys extremely reliable including even one who knocked to my door at 10 p.m. on the dot as he promised day before.

 

Just as a slightest sidenote - letting the boy to go to his off outside the soi at 23:50 and saying him to return at 01:00 is a bit non-realistic. Providing MonBoy has already suggested 02:00, he really could think about 01:00 just as a spoken face-saving figure, but not as an actually expected time. So in this case I am more with Christian.

But the episode has a good end anyway

[JackR]

Your reports are great Numazu. Really enjoyable to read. Makes me want to get back to Bangkok asap!

 

Would really be interested to hear your stories of Mexico as well. I've never been there, but I would love to know about that scene and the guys. Even if you wrote about it on another thread or another section.

[Guest samebb]

Just as a slightest sidenote - letting the boy to go to his off outside the soi at 23:50 and saying him to return at 01:00 is a bit non-realistic. Providing MonBoy has already suggested 02:00, he really could think about 01:00 just as a spoken face-saving figure, but not as an actually expected time. So in this case I am more with Christian.

But the episode has a good end anyway

 

Your comment is appreciated but slightly out of perspective. It can be hard understanding a situation fully when you are not a party to it... in real life. The boy did what he did because he felt another was chosen over him. It wasn't a time issue. 

 

All worked out in the end. Everyone was happy. This time, for once!!!! It wasn't lost in translation. It was lost in emotion. 

MonBoy, the cousin of a boy very close to my heart is a beautiful person. Numazu is so lucky hehe

[worldatlarge]

Day 2.0: How to do Long Time - Numazu style

 

 

So here are the steps on how I do Long Time:

 

Evening Sex: Feeling Each Other Out

 

Easily the biggest I’ve had in Thailand. The cock was hard and wrapped in a healthy amount of foreskin. The foreskin itself was thick as well. I look up to him. He was looking down at me, smiling. He probably is used to this, customers admiring his cock.

 

 

 

(Sorry a bit late) But still needs to be asked....: So, you got bigger out of Thailand???

 

Just saying!!

[aussie_]

Do you really speak with him that way? It makes me cringe to read. Do the boy a favor and speak standard English with him.

I have a friend who does the same with every Thai he meets which i find a bit silly because some Thais can speak very good english. IMHO Asians will learn better English language skills if we speak to them normally without modifying the language. Still my friend and Numazu are doing quite well connecting with the Thais and others so this is a recommendation not a criticism.

[a447a]

English has way too many superfluous words; words which have no particular meaning but are required for grammatical accuracy. It is these words which confuse non- native speakers and makes English difficult for them to understand. Having seen Japanese struggling with English over the years, I'm talking from experience here.

 

So I also speak in a kind of broken English, as communication is my main aim. I'm not interested in teaching them English, unless I'm speaking to one of my regulars. In that case, I'll go out of my way to improve their English.

 

But to be honest, I haven't noticed any real improvement in the guys I teach. They don't have the opportunity to speak correct English.

 

Besides, most guys just want to get their message across and are not interested in the intricacies of the language.

[numazu]

Day 2.6: HBD BurBoy

 

(Sidenote: When did HBD become the shorthand for Happy Birthday in Thailand?)

 

So with the Birthday sex (and the birthday nap and shower) out of the way, it was time to start BurBoy’s birthday celebration in earnest. I didn’t have anything specific planned, except for the gogoflorist flowers I got him a week ago, but I really wanted to give him whatever he wanted today. Shopping spree? My wallet is ready. Fast and Furious 7? My eyeballs are ready. Topping numazu? My hole is ready.

 

So when I asked him what he wanted as a present for his birthday, I wasn’t surprised that he couldn’t come up with anything outright. Throughout our relationship, BurBoy has not asked for much, just for my time, which I don’t have in abundance. So I ask him what material things he wanted, and he couldn’t name anything. I had to badger him all week last week as to what a good present was for him. He finally came up with something: a pair of smart looking Supra sneakers that was very popular with the young ones these days. He picked the cheapest pair: $50. There were much more expensive choices. I asked him if he wanted other things. HE said no. So I order it from Amazon and carried it with me in my carry-on.

 

And there was the matter of the shopping spree. I suggested that we go to Siam Paragon to get him Hi-So clothes and paraphernalia. He said Siam Paragon was only for farang and not for him. I suggested Terminal 21. No. Platinum? No. MBK? No. I gave up and asked him what he wanted to buy that he he needed anyway. He told me he has run out of protein powder. I bought him a big tub of it last January for 1800 baht. I must admit that I gladly make this purchase for him for selfish reasons. I buy it so that he can keep fit for me. So I gladly say yes to this request. He says we should go to Center One Shopping Plaza near the Victory monument for it, as well as get lunch and other things.

 

So we wear our shirts and shorts and sneakers (I love that he dresses like me. There is no mismatch look like other boys). We head over to Chong Nonsi station BTS to ride it all the way the Victory Monument station.  20 minutes later we see this:

 

 

I’ve never been to Center One Shopping Plaza, but upon entering I immediately thought that this was predominantly a local's mall.  Not a lot of English-language signage and there was more clutter than usual scattered in random parts of the mall. The customers were mostly Thai as well, and minimal farang. BurBoy tells me we shall eat lunch at the food court. BurBoy asks me for 500 baht and he gives it to the cashier to load it to a food card. The food was cheap and mostly Thai and Chinese dishes. We both got rice dish each and some appetizers and drinks. It was cheap at 330 baht total. Probably why this is a locals favorite.

 

I ask BurBoy if he wanted some birthday cake. He was really thoughtful in buying me a 900 baht birthday cake on my birthday over Songkran, so I wanted him to have something similar. He thought about it for a moment and said that we should have ice cream at Swensen’s, the ice cream shop that was popular in Thai malls. I see this ice cream chain all over the USA and I have not even thought of eating in one. Now I will try it for the first time, in a local mall in Bangkok. We order and this was the damage:

 

 

I forgot how much everything was but it was definitely as much as our lunch.

 

Finally, BurBoy leads me to a shop where they sold fitness products. He looks over the inventory and asks the shop girl what best to buy for what he was looking for. He also asks me for my opinion. We settle on a tub of whey protein that was 2000 baht.  Happy birthday BurBoy:

 

 

BurBoy then tells me that he wants to go home. I ask him if he wanted to go to see a movie. He says no, he just wants to relax with me at the condo. I ask him if he wanted to buy more things.  He said no, he had everything he needed. Now, he says he just wants to “hug and kiss” me all day. If that’s what he wants, that’s what’s going to happen. The shopping spree apparently was not going to happen.

 

We take the BTS back to Chong Nonsi. We stop by the 7-11 and get BurBoy and I more snacks for the stay in. We get home, and BurBoy turns on the TV to look for a suitable movie for us to see in this lazy afternoon. After tuning into a few channels he finds the movie “Starship Troopers,” a movie I’ve seen a number of times before. It was the perfect mindless movie for a lazy afternoon.

 

While we watch the movie, BurBoy steals kisses once in a while. He holds my hand, puts his head on my lap, and asks questions about certain elements of the movie. The movie ends and another one begins. BurBoy gets up and gets some snacks and some juice for us to share. When we finish he goes back to put his head on my lap. It was after dark now:

 

 

Now I fully understood what was happening, and why BurBoy chose this kind of day to spend his birthday.  This was his version of the boyfriend experience, with me, his part-time boyfriend. We hardly had any time together to just be a couple. It’s usually me insisting on going here and there, to a bar at 10:30 PM, or to MBK to hoard the cheapest trinkets Bangkok can offer, or eat elaborate dinners at Mango Tree. This was enough for him, and for me, and this was much more satisfying.

 

This is really where the relationships happens right? It happens in the moments in between the things you do together. It’s the quiet moments together, not really doing anything, that makes the relationship. If both of you enjoy these moments of nothing, then you can make anything work. And I wish it didn’t have to end. I wish I could stop the world from turning. This was going to end tomorrow, at least for this trip. What if this was my life everyday? Can I make it work?

 

And I knew the answer even before the thought completed in my head. BurBoy was the angel that descended upon my hedonistic life here in Bangkok. Once in a while I needed to bask in his purity and innocence, and his kindness and love. I know I am not good for him, and I truly do not deserve him. I should just be content in the few moments we have together. Anything more would just spoil it, more for him than for me.

 

While he watches the movie with his head on my lap, I put a hand through his hair, and then lean over to kiss him. Someday this will end. I don’t know how or when or who will pull the trigger. But it will. 

 

At 9 PM I ask BurBoy if he was hungry. He said he was but did not want to venture out too far from Silom. I look at my cellphone and see hundreds of texts from MonBoy, and some from my friend samebb. I reply to samebb to see what he was doing. He said that he was headed to Soi 4 and asked if we could join him. We agree on meeting at Balcony bar, as I remember samebb and the Lion eating there last night. I remind samebb to pretend that I did not see him last night, for BurBoy's benefit, and to act like this was the first time we are seeing each other this trip.

 

I tell BurBoy what was going to happen and ask him if it was OK with him. He asks about samebb and I told him he has met him twice already, once in Janaury, and over Songkran. We freshen up and begin to head over to Soi 4. On the way I text MonBoy that I will meet him at 11 tomorrow. He replies with a lot of cutesie emojis and a few photos of him currently just enjoying his rare night off from Jupiter. I suddenly remember that Balcony pub is almost just across from Jupiter. What a mess it would be if MonBoy was there. BurBoy will instantly know what was up.

 

We get to Soi 4 and see samebb on his usual perch on Balcony pub. We get greeted with warm hugs. BurBoy likes kissing my friends on the cheek, which was nice to see. We order some food, and I order some Thai rice dish and BurBoy orders a steak and fries. samebb remarks that its strange that the westerner is eating the Asian dish, and the Asian is eating the steak. Food is not Balcony pub’s strong suit, but thankfully we ordered strong drinks with our food.

 

Overall it was a low-key but satisfying birthday celebration day with BurBoy. Amongst the laughter and conversation tonight, I become wistful and keep thinking again, what if this was my life? In Bangkok with BurBoy and friends. Will I be satisfied? I guess not. I look across to Jupiter and know that I will never be satisfied. I kiss BurBoy’s hand. We enjoy the rest of our night together.

 

Next, from BurBoy to MonBoy.

[faranglaw]

How love can complicate life. And maybe it was a slip of the keyboard, but you did call Burboy "the" love of your life, not "a" love of your life. He sounds like such an incredible catch! And you've caught him, but you can't keep him. There is irony here; pain and passion and exhilaration and deception, too.

 

Love is a stranger in an open car,

Who tempts you in and drives you far away...

 

http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=8144

 

(For those who remember the Eurythmics)

[vinapu]

"Now I fully understood what was happening, and why BurBoy chose this kind of day to spend his birthday.  This was his version of the boyfriend experience, with me, his part-time boyfriend. We hardly had any time together to just be a couple. It’s usually me insisting on going here and there, to a bar at 10:30 PM, or to MBK to hoard the cheapest trinkets Bangkok can offer, or eat elaborate dinners at Mango Tree. This was enough for him, and for me, and this was much more satisfying"

 

I think you are spot on with that assessment . All  of your activities together are initiated by you and he just plays along. Having quiet time at home he ensured that some of that time is for his pleasure.

 

Often when outside with boys we forget that whether we like or not , they are playing unintended second fiddle for pure financial reason. Waiting for us to buy them something doesn't do much for their self esteem.

 

I learned that lesson form quasi boyfriend I took from Pattaya to BKK  in Jun 2015 when noticed that he takes pleasure if I let him to go to cash register and pay. It was still my money but it was him who was paying, small ego booster I guess. Ever since quite often when with boy I let them to settle a bill  / and keep a change, LOL /

 

By the way , that boy also had  chosen  whey protein jar as a parting gift .

[emailbroken]

I'm actually starting to feel very sorry for BurBoy.

[Guest ronnie4you]

I have a friend who does the same with every Thai he meets which i find a bit silly because some Thais can speak very good english. IMHO Asians will learn better English language skills if we speak to them normally without modifying the language. Still my friend and Numazu are doing quite well connecting with the Thais and others so this is a recommendation not a criticism.

I find Numazu's way of speaking helps the communication flow as the Thai guys usually don't understand the bulk of the words, so focus on the important words. If you find that he speaks English better, well, it's simple enough to adjust your words to his level of understanding.

[kentop]

Am I the only one falling in love with BurBoy here ? 

[faranglaw]

Am I the only one falling in love with BurBoy here ?

 

No.

[Guest samebb]

Numazu has learned the art of using only the vital words when communicating with non-native English speakers, specifically Asian ones. Dare I say on occasion he has been able to milk more info that I ever could, from the same boy, when only changing his choice of words. 

It is perfectly fine if people like Christian wish to speak their version of English. I mean "version"/
(for the record, having met Christian, I can't understand a word he says and I am from England, so god help a Thai boy.)
But in doing that, all you will achieve is learning less about the boy you are with, and possibly worse, not communicating enough information to experience everything you could have from your paid encounter. 

 

Even I learn from Numazu. He's a master at this stuff!

[kokopelli]

 

It is perfectly fine if people like Christian wish to speak their version of English. I mean "version"/

(for the record, having met Christian, I can't understand a word he says and I am from England, so god help a Thai boy.)

 

Christian doesn't have to speak English, he can speak Thai. Having met Christian I understand him quite well, but then, I am not from England. Not to be a smart ass, or is it arse, but I do have trouble understanding some of the accents from the UK. 

[Guest samebb]

Christian doesn't have to speak English, he can speak Thai. Having met Christian I understand him quite well, but then, I am not from England. Not to be a smart ass, or is it arse, but I do have trouble understanding some of the accents from the UK.

 

some parts of the UK speak very strange dialects and sometimes with horrific accents. I too don't understand a number of them.