Erratic Bar Boy Behaviour

[Guest]

Farang A offs boy X several times, long time.

  Boy X  is very sweet and attentive, which is also noted by Farang B and C.

 

Farang B offs boy X, long time.   That goes well, so a follow up is arranged. 

   The follow up is a disaster.  Boy X calls a halt before they even get beyond the smooching & onto the naughty stuff, but still demands the full short time tip even though they haven't started.  He threatens to cause damage to the room if this is not paid.

 

What is causing this sudden change of behaviour ?  

Is it drugs ? (which type)     That would be my theory. 

What are the signs to watch for ?

Has anyone else seen the same issues ?

 

Note:

1 Both farangs paid the same long time tip.

2 Both farangs are very careful with their body & oral hygiene.  

3 Farang B frequently offs the same boys again, with no cases of people refusing the offer of another off.

 

There are various reasons for not disclosing the name of boy X, including the involvement of 2 farangs & his bar manager has been known to post here.

[jfarmer017]

Honestly, I don't see how you are going to get satisfactory response. The information is simply too limited. Could it be drug-related? Sure. Could it be that the guy has a mental or emotional problem? That, too. Maybe he got a better offer from someone else, and he was looking for a way out. Maybe he was in a bad mood that day because of something that happened between he and a friend or he and a foreigner he talks to online. I mean, we can all come and type responses here that speculate about why some random person acted some random way one day, but I don't see much insight for you to gain. 

 

I think probably a lot of the problems that occur between Thais and faring is miscommunication (if you are the least  bit discriminatory in your choice of partners). In the years I have spent in Thailand, I have never had a situation escalate between myself and a Thai person where anything remotely resembling violence or the threat of violence is involved. I accept that I might just have gotten very lucky over the years; however, I do believe that I put a good deal of effort into looking for people who are of a like mind than me. If they are not, I move on. 

[zombie]

My view: sounds likely X on "something", perhaps YB hence causing the aggressive behavior.

I assume the tip was paid.

My experience is that such an attitude from X can be as a result of drug taking, then again I am no expert, and many will be on "substances" with no outward signs etc

[lilbob69]

Thankfully I've never had this kind of issue.

 

There could be many reasons as to Boy X's behavior. Ranging from a bad day to drugs. The threat of damage to the room, however, is totally unacceptable IMHO.

 

I would suggest that a visit to the boys bar manager may well be in order. If this is an ongoing issue with customers the bar would be crazy to keep Boy X working. I'm sure also that word would spread around the other Bars about his behavior.. If the Bar manager is active on here why not PM him and outline the concerns mentioned?

[vinapu]

Everybody so far seems to be pointing at boy but unless z909 himself is Farang B we don't know if fault is boy's or his.

 

We know only story as seen by farang.  Perhaps  he wanted boy to do something he never asked boys before?.

 

If boy all of the sudden started to  behave erratically, why to assume farang wouldn't? 

 

Not trying to switch the blame  but  it looks we  assume it's the boy who is at fault which may be as well but as jfarmer pointed we don't know enough.

 

I had somewhat similar case in Nov 2013 described in my "Off to Thailand" thread, boy who looked and acted normally after dressed in somewhat feminine clothes  started to behave erratically after we left the bar. We did not go even into smooching stage , not to mention naughty. After I did not manage even to touch him in good 20 minutes in the room I asked him to leave and he still demanded short time tip, called his mamasan etc, after a bit of drama I managed to get him out for consideration of 1000 baht in order to avoid an escalation. This is my erratic boy story.

 

One of massage boys I try to see every trip told be about his adventure in Dec, He has European Quasi Boyfriend who comes for years  at end every year  in order to be pummeled by the boy. After week or so , well fucked,  goes home to be seen next year  in Nov or Dec again. Well behaving farang and I saw them together few times so I always ask boy how he is doing and it's why he told me a story.

 

Last time though,  all of the sudden he wanted to change roles and wanted to top the boy first time ever.

 

No drama here as boy is gay ,  flexible and enjoys both ways but what would happen if he was not willing to bottom?  May be we would hear another crazy boy story? 

 

That's my 3 pennies.  

[Guest Hutchison]

Two sides to every story,

ask Judge Judy 

[a447a]

Wanting to trash a hotel room is extreme behaviour. This makes me think drugs were involved.

 

I read a story on one of the boatds where a seemingly normal bar guy went feral in the hotel room - a complete personality change. In that case, drugs were involved.

[ChristianPFC]

I had a spectacular change in performance with one boy (first encounter was so good I took him again on next trip to Pattaya, second encounter sleeping all day and night in my room and reluctant to do anything sexual). I give second chances (after poor performance in bed), but threatening is a no-no. I never had an experience like one in the op, closest was a boy from Soi Twilight about 4 years ago who demanded 2000 for ST and didn't move, had to shove him out with 1600.

[Alexx]

Wanting to trash a hotel room is extreme behaviour. This makes me think drugs were involved.

I'd tend to think the same.

[Guest Stewart]

Best book room 224 at Zing Ganymede as there is nothing in the room worth trashing, in fact it might make a considerable improvement.

Seriously though a recent ST "off" at Dreams Boys where all was meticulously planned and payment (s) agreed and paid only to find that the boy once in the ST room decided that he was not going to keep to his side of the bargain. Another day and I would be a bit pissed about this but coupled with my guilty "playing away from home" pangs decided to let him go as far as he wanted then upped and left. He got his money but the look on his face suggested that he was hoping for a different response from me. 

None of us tourist faring want any trouble and some boys may see this as a way of extracting extra cash by frightening us poor souls.

[Guest]

Everybody so far seems to be pointing at boy but unless z909 himself is Farang B we don't know if fault is boy's or his.

Z909 is not Farang B.  Although Farang B is very well known to Z909 & well thought of.  [More reasons why names are not used]

 

The people concerned have good previous track records, although in the case of boy X, it's limited to what's described above, plus a couple more meetings in an earlier year.  

 

I am suspecting drugs were a contributor. This incident wasn't even the first time with Farang B offing boy X.

If it is drugs, figuring out how to spot the signs is the challenge.

 

The only drug related behaviour I've directly experienced is:

 

1   Boy Y.  Adorable, bouncing up & down on my lap naked in the bar.  Then our hotel session got an unexpected "half time" break, when he went to his room for a fix with some friends.   That's the only time I ever visited a bar boy's room & even though I wasn't joining in, swiftly figured it could be quite expensive if the boys in brown ever showed up, so I left.  Activities resumed about an hour later.  No aggression.

 

 2  Boy W:  Bright lively & friendly on the first off.  Equally keen to be offed the next time I went in the bar, but seemed to be completely lacking in energy & somewhat vacant when I did off him.    I think that's more than just being tired.

 

So no aggression in either case.

[vinapu]

Best book room 224 at Zing Ganymede as there is nothing in the room worth trashing, in fact it might make a considerable improvement.

Seriously though a recent ST "off" at Dreams Boys where all was meticulously planned and payment (s) agreed and paid only to find that the boy once in the ST room decided that he was not going to keep to his side of the bargain. Another day and I would be a bit pissed about this but coupled with my guilty "playing away from home" pangs decided to let him go as far as he wanted then upped and left. He got his money but the look on his face suggested that he was hoping for a different response from me. 

 

i'd not be shy to name him  or give his number here but you may have your own preference.

 

I had a good laugh about room 224 comment , thank you

[ggobkk]

Still trying to figure out "c"'s place in all this...

[Guest abang1961]

To be honest, I'm guilty of this behavior  too.

I meet a guy, have a good dinner and interesting conversation and then, go home.  Sorry I don't jump into bed on the first date.

 

But somehow the frizzle dies down after the second/third date (before sex  actually happen!) and suddenly, he simply isn't my cup of tea. Really there is no reason to reject him - suave, financially independent and the right personality.  I turn cold almost immediately and it is difficult for him to fathom the sudden abandon. I would message him and tell him the truth but it is a rather bitter pill for him. (katy perry's hot and cold playing in the background)

[vinapu]

 

So no aggression in either case.

it may me different drug or people react differently to the same drug like an alcohol, after use some are getting sleepy , some aggressive and still some extremely merry

[Guest FossilGay]

To be honest, I'm guilty of this behavior  too.

I meet a guy, have a good dinner and interesting conversation and then, go home.  Sorry I don't jump into bed on the first date.

 

But somehow the frizzle dies down after the second/third date (before sex  actually happen!) and suddenly, he simply isn't my cup of tea. Really there is no reason to reject him - suave, financially independent and the right personality.  I turn cold almost immediately and it is difficult for him to fathom the sudden abandon. I would message him and tell him the truth but it is a rather bitter pill for him. (katy perry's hot and cold playing in the background)

 

Hmmm...are you living in some parallel noodle universe?  What has your story got to do with z909's post?

[Guest abang1961]

Dear Fossilguy,

I believe this is your freest/first time ...Can you say something positive''constructive"

Or do you prefer to shoot your fire at anyone?

. 

I am simply drawing parallel (almost perpendicular) to erratic behaviour.  Are you bipolar, yourself?

[ChristianPFC]

Abang1961 is without money, there it's quite natural to take it a your pace, and no activity if you lose interest.

The op writes about hiring a moneyboy, completely different.

 

Best book room 224 at Zing Ganymede as there is nothing in the room worth trashing, in fact it might make a considerable improvement.

Seriously though a recent ST "off" at Dreams Boys where all was meticulously planned and payment (s) agreed and paid only to find that the boy once in the ST room decided that he was not going to keep to his side of the bargain. Another day and I would be a bit pissed about this but coupled with my guilty "playing away from home" pangs decided to let him go as far as he wanted then upped and left. He got his money but the look on his face suggested that he was hoping for a different response from me. 

None of us tourist faring want any trouble and some boys may see this as a way of extracting extra cash by frightening us poor souls.

 

I can't follow. Dream Boys (Bangkok or Pattaya?), short time off and short time room (i.e. not your place), that's clear.

 

"payment (s) agreed and paid" Paid before the act? I did make a partial payment in advance once, only to end up almost robbed (an no sex). Every person I told the story said you don't pay prostitutes in advance, nowhere in the world, no time in history.

 

"decided to let him go as far as he wanted then upped and left." What does that mean, especially upped?

 

"the look on his face suggested that he was hoping for a different response from me." What response do you think he expected?

[traveller123]

"upped" and left is British slang for got up and went away. There is no sexual connotation.

[Guest abang1961]

Abang1961 is without money, there it's quite natural to take it a your pace, and no activity if you lose

interest.

*****

 

I cannot believe you could write such insulting remarks... You certainly was not charged a single cent

during your stay.... how could you have this audacity to draw such conclusions. I am

sorely disappointed ....Chao chee bye to you... swearing ....

[Guest FossilGay]

Abang1961 is without money, there it's quite natural to take it a your pace, and no activity if you lose

interest.

*****

 

 

What Christian meant is that your situation wasn't a commercial one and thus fundamentally different from the OP's story.

 

I cannot believe you could write such insulting remarks... You certainly was not charged a single cent

during your stay.... how could you have this audacity to draw such conclusions. I am

sorely disappointed ....Chao chee bye to you... swearing ....

 

I googled "chao chee bye" and it supposedly means smelly cunt (or commonly used to mean "fuck your mother/fuck your mother's smelly cunt") in Hokkien Chinese and is the ultimate insult in that language.  That is so rude; Christian may be anal but saying he fucks his own mother is beyond the pale.  Quite vicious.

[Guest]

How threads go off the rails.

The original post was about a darling boy who suddenly turns really aggressive after multiple dates. 

 

Someone else posts about getting tired of someone but as far as I can tell teminating matters in a very civilised way. So I struggle to find the relevance to the opening post, but it is no excuse for hostile replies.

 

Then add in what might be a couple of minor misunderstandings by people who have English as a second language, even if to a very high level.  

 

Then top it off with some silly pointless rude comments.

There are more constructive things to do.    

[vinapu]

 

"payment (s) agreed and paid" Paid before the act? I did make a partial payment in advance once, only to end up almost robbed (an no sex). Every person I told the story said you don't pay prostitutes in advance, nowhere in the world, no time in history.

 

 

as I mentioned recently in another thread, on the last trip I decided to experiment and actually gave whole tip to  the boy in advance. I was expecting his excuses to leave early and was nicely surprised  that not only it did not happen but he actually was not in rush to leave, rather it was me because of trip to Ayuthaya in the morning who released him to his freedom to go.

 

But this was boy I offed few times before / and very one we met when both of us were dining at Wat Hualampong in Dec 2014 /.

[vinapu]

What Christian meant is that your situation wasn't a commercial one and thus fundamentally different from the OP's story.

 

 

I googled "chao chee bye" and it supposedly means smelly cunt (or commonly used to mean "fuck your mother/fuck your mother's smelly cunt") in Hokkien Chinese and is the ultimate insult in that language.  That is so rude; Christian may be anal but saying he fucks his own mother is beyond the pale.  Quite vicious.

Exactly this was how I read Christian comment and I'm surprised by such  astron reaction.

 

what is going on here recently? One poster is calling another Moron, then other again  is advising another one to fuck his own mother, still another is calling somebody 'anal'?

 

I thought only girls have hot flashes !

[Guest FossilGay]

Exactly this was how I read Christian comment and I'm surprised by such  astron reaction.

 

what is going on here recently? One poster is calling another Moron, then other again  is advising another one to fuck his own mother, still another is calling somebody 'anal'?

 

I thought only girls have hot flashes !

 

I think Abang's hot flashes may be of the menopausal kind.  I recall having them when I turned 55, marking my transition from middle age to old age.

 

I think Christian wears the anal badge with pride.  His idiosyncracies provide a nice balance (and some humour) to the outpourings of sentimentality and ostentatious attempts at appearing generous that we often read here.  His posts are usually helpful and factual and I don't ever recall him being mean-spirited, telling others what/where they can post, calling them morons or illiterate, or worse, telling them to fuck their own mothers.