My first off!

[Guest whall]

I broke my off virginity tonight! To much to write about with just using my iPhone. I feel sort of bad, but it was one hell of a rush. I was the only one in xsize and all 20+ boys were looking at me and trying to get my attention. I felt very uncomfortable with that, but it was sort of hot. Not gonna lie. I guess I'm conflicted.

 

I went to fresh boys last night and the mansman (sp?) was so pushy. It was awful. He wanted me to buy him a drink. Which I stupidly said yes. And he was hugging me and touching me. It was disgusting. And I told him I didn't want him to bring one boy off the stage that I liked to sit with me. But he did anyway which made things worse cuz I knew I didn't have enough cash for any of that. I had enough to cover the drinks. I guess I wasn't thinking of that when I went in there. I said I needed to go to the atm and I'll come back. I paid for my drinks and he told the boy to watch my drink and he said yes. I hope he didn't wait to long. I'm sure that is common. It was just a horrible situation and I wanted to get out of it.

 

The person at xsize was a little pushy, but not that obnoxious. I realize this is about money, but being too pushy and fake annoys me.

 

Anyway the boy I went home with was real nice and cute and we had a good time. Well, I did. Not sure about him. Lol

 

Anyway, very different experience than picking up college kids off grindr or Craigslist. Which is what I usually do.

[paulsf]

Sorry you had a tough time your first time out. But it will get better. I think most of us have gone thru what you did on our first trips.

It took me a couple of weeks before I could say no. Now it's not a problem. The mamasans and boys hear no, more than they hear yes. Don't be afraid to say NO. Nothing will happen. They will just move on to the next customer.

When I go into a place now and see the Mamasan charging at me, I look away and shoo him off with my hand and then ignor him.

Don't let your first time scare you off, use it as a learning experience and don't be afraid to just say no.

[biguyby]

Pushy Mamasan says to me "you give me tip" I reply "NO" end of story.

 

Just relax and enjoy and don't let them get to you, most will soon get to know you and leave you alone if you are firm with them.

 

Good luck with your adventure.

[Guest]

You can normally manage fine without the services of a mamasan, as most of the boys speak enough English to get the deal done.

When the mamasans do translate, it can be a complete waste of time as you cannot trust them.

 

Therefore, the way to deal with them is to send them away, ignore them, never buy them a drink etc.   Make sure the more pushy they are, the less likely you are to tip them.   Save the tips for the boys.

 

Don't let them spoil your trips to the bars. 

[a447a]

When I was in Freshboys earlier this month there were only a couple of customers. The guys started moving towards me and the mama-san asked me which guy I wanted. Even though I insisted I was just looking, he brought a guy over, so promptly day down next to me. I politely asked him to leave, only to have the mama-san bring over another.

 

Times are tough for the bars at the moment and everyone is getting desperate. If they had any common sense, they'd lower the price of drinks as that would encourage all the tourists sitting in the beer bars to come inside and have a drink. Maybe some would then ask a guy to sit with them and buy them a drink. Who knows - some guys may even get offed. I'm not a drinker, but I know I'd much rather have a beer whilst looking at guys in their underwear, rather than sitting outside watching other tourists walk by. I'm more than willing to pay more for my drink, but 350 baht is way over the top when they don't have a show.

 

The bars have got their price structure all wrong and have no idea how to make a baht. They want the few customers who do step inside to make up the revenue lost from those who decide to stay outside. Crazy.

 

And whall, I know it's early days, but how did your experience with the Thai guy compare with those college guys?

[brall3]

No Whall, unfortunately "it" will not get better in time; the aggressiveness and tactics of the mamasans seem to prevail through time.

 

In over 30 years of visiting Thailand, I have seen vast and unbelievable changes in the cities of Bangkok, Pattaya, and Chiang Mai. From the BTS, MRT, changing skylines, using a computerized toilet as oppose to a hole in the ground, meeting guys over a video communication system as oppose to meeting them on the streets or in bars, yes a lot of changes have happen in Thailand, but the actions of the mamasans sadly remains the same. So no, "it" will not get better in time.

 

One has to learn how to deal with the prevailing pushy mamasans or stop going to places with mamasans. Learning to deal with an aggressive mamasans is as varied as each individual is different. Thanks to a few contributors to this and other Internet sites, several suggestions have been made on how to deal with a pushy mamasan. Combining that knowledge with your own individual personality should enhance your visit to Thailand.

 

Mamasans are like car dealers, you dread dealing with them but you are delighted with the final product. And yes, just like cars, every now and then you end up with a lemon; just squeeze and keep on trucking (smile).

 

HAVE A GREAT TRIP!!!!!

[vinapu]

 

Anyway the boy I went home with was real nice and cute and we had a good time. Well, I did. Not sure about him. Lol

 

This is most important. Boy was nice and cute and you had a good time.

 

Don't be scared by the experience, with  every visit you will be able to deal with mamasans better and better and at one point you will be able to reject their tip pleads smoothly. Treat all this as learning curve but never forget that sensible advice above :

"leave your tips for the boys".

 

I must admit sometimes I buy mamasans a drink - this is when I'm bar hopping and already saturated with drinks. This way bar has it's drink sold and mamasan is definitely off my chest.

 

As for hugging and touching - never let them do it uninvited unless you happen to like him / I like Art, mamasan at Arena a lot , few at Dreamboys are helpfull and not too pushy as well/. Firm slam on the hand will do the trick.

 

Keep whoring and reporting !

[fedssocr]

I understand that it can be difficult. The mamasans can be excellent students of psychology. They know that most people don't like confrontation so they push as far as they can get away with. Don't feel bad about saying no to anyone who is trying to extract money out of you uninvited. And certainly don't allow yourself to be groped by some one you don't want groping you. I think that's probably all part of their testing of your boundaries. It's easy to feel bad about having to be firm because no one likes to disappoint others, but you gotta do what you gotta do.

 

I've only ever felt good about buying drinks for a mamasan at one bar that sadly no longer exists, mainly because I enjoyed the vibe of the place and the people who worked there. The good ones know how to treat you nicely and with at least the illusion of respect. Others are just pushy and annoying and gross. But my guess is that they've discovered it's easier for them to make a quick buck out of you than it is to cultivate loyal business. Of course in the end what really matters is the boys.

[gumbleby]

I must admit sometimes I buy mamasans a drink - this is when I'm bar hopping and already saturated with drinks. This way bar has it's drink sold and mamasan is definitely off my chest.

 

Good idea when barhopping, I never thought about this way of dealing with mammasans. How do they react to "OK, I'm not thirsty, you can have my drink"?

[vinapu]

I But my guess is that they've discovered it's easier for them to make a quick buck out of you than it is to cultivate loyal business. 

and probably they are right unfortunately. Tourists are coming and going, very few stay long and frequent the same bar. Expats and residents are always complaining about prices so chances are they don'y frequent bars too often.

 

So it leaves mamasans with ' grab what you can and run' option. 

 

Being pushy groping may have merit too - lots of first timers may be shy or don't know how to behave so being groped may tell them that boundaries inside are far from those outside of the bar.

 

I kind of like them out of gratitude to my first one ever who explained me process step by step and suggested pick I still remember fondly.

 

We need to remember , their job is to get us to off the boy

[vinapu]

Good idea when barhopping, I never thought about this way of dealing with mammasans. How do they react to "OK, I'm not thirsty, you can have my drink"?

When saturated I'm not offering mamasans my drink , I tell them upfront that I don't want drink but buy one for them instead. 

 

They are always happy with the offer.

[Guest whall]

I went to nature boys last night. Place is really small. I was the only one there yet again. I hate that. The three cute skinny guys were up front on their phones. The two chubby ones that I wasn't interested in were next to me touching me and wanting something to happen. I just drank a little bit and left. If one of the three had been near me, something might have happened.

 

I went to golden cock next and same thing. I was the only one and the only one that I might of been interested in was on his phone and looked disinterested. Two guys I wasn't interested in sat next to me trying to get something going. I just paid for my drink again and left.

 

I hate being the only one at these places. Maybe I'm going to early or this time of the year is really dead.

 

I started walking back and a cute guy from sun massage stopped me and tried to get me to get massaged. But he was top and there were only two Bottoms and I wasn't interested in them. I told him pity you are a top cuz he was cute and I would of gone with him.

 

Went back to my hotel and hopped on grindr which is the easiest and cheapest and fastest way to get a money boy if you ask me. Doesn't give me a rush like the other places.

 

Anyway, on grindr I met one that worked at a spa and we negotiated everything. I'm much better doing that stuff on Internet than in person. I can be quite shy sometimes. So I went to meet him. I finally found his studio but he was just too gay for me that I backed out which upset him. I just left.

 

Went back to boystown bar and had a drink. I was sitting at hotmale bar and this 21 year old came on to me and we went back to my hotel room and had sex.

 

Tarntawan policy of taking the id of your joiner and then calling you to make sure everything is okay before giving the id back is quite safe and efficient. I like this place and would recommend it highly.

[vinapu]

 

Went back to my hotel and hopped on grindr which is the easiest and cheapest and fastest way to get a money boy if you ask me. 

 

Anyway, on grindr I met one that worked at a spa and we negotiated everything. I'm much better doing that stuff on Internet than in person. I can be quite shy sometimes. So I went to meet him. I finally found his studio but he was just too gay for me that I backed out which upset him. I just left.

 

that's the reason some of us still prefer to go and see boy in the flesh - can be sized up , talked to and  looked in the eye to minimize possible disappointments. And there's whole bar atmosphere to soak in.

 

But for shy, economizing and horny at non-standard hours types social media are   of great help.

[Guest whall]

Yeah there is truth to all that! More of a rush and different from what I'm used to also.

[a447a]

"...horny at non-standard hours"....???

 

I don't have standard hours; Im horny 24/7!

 

Lol

[marcolastrauman]

We all have our first time experience. Later in your future visits, you'll be more "expert" in a sense that you'll know how to say no and not fall into the spell of the mamasans. No matter how pushy, just say no and smile and ignore. it's a trick that needs mastering. 

 

in making sure you have a good time, make sure the boy you bring home is the kind of boy who atleast stared at you and showed some sort of interest while he was still on the stage. based on my experience and many others in this forum, those who don't will likely be a dud.