lookin

Please tell Ensign Hito to stay out of my closet

Something tells me it ends up great and swell, with perhaps a detour through the Great Wind Chest.

Two big dicks, Two big dicks. See how they grow, See how they grow. They both came after the farmer's boy, Who let out a gasp as he jumped for joy, And ran to the workshop to make a new toy, With two big dicks.

Perhaps they were busy tearing up his winning lottery tickets.

Remember, I merely thought that's what he said. The fiction of his diction left much to the imagination. Not sure if I had heard correctly, I tried saying 'lonely' versus 'lowly' out loud and was amazed by how small a shift in tongue placement is required to switch from one word to the other. Not to further divert this august thread away from the Dowager Countess, but Julian Fellowes seems to have enough good lines to go around. Some that had me laughing out loud this weekend were bestowed on Lady Mary and Charles Blake, and on Carson the butler. First, after saving the recently acquired pigs from dehydration, Blake and Lady Mary devolve into a mud fight. What do I look like? You belong in Country Life. "Lady Mary Crawley, seen here to advantage relaxing at the family seat in Yorkshire." Then, after pressing Ethan, Harold Levinson's American valet, into service at Lady Rose's ball, Carson catches him actively and vocally pushing savories onto passing guests. You're a footman, not a traveling salesman. That's probably why I can watch these episodes again and again. Always something I missed the first time.

Well, seeing as it's creeping up on 9:47am PST, and this opportunity won't arise every day, I figure I might as well give it a try and see what happens. Edit: Drat! I thought I was going to stay airborne the full three seconds when I remembered my fallen arches.

According to this article, you may have fallen for your first Twitter hoax. Still, no reason to take any unnecessary chances.

Watched this episode last night and I believe the self-deprecating Lord Aysgarth said "lowly barony" although, like many in the British upper classes, his mouth was full of pebbles and it was hard to tell. He may have been lonely as well, but lowly fits the facts nicely with a Baron being at the bottom of the peerage pecking order. And, according to this Wikipedia article, it's the age of the title, rather than the title itself, that determines heritability. The older titles do descend through females while the more recently created ones don't. Perhaps some of our nobler fellow posters will weigh in if I've fumbled this folderol. I've been so common for so long, it's more than a possibility.

Gifted with a 2400 baud modem, I signed up with my ISP a quarter century ago. Spent the next fifteen years getting more fully on-line, and the last ten trying to get off. These days, I can't think of anyone who would be interested in my every thought nor anyone whose day-and-night musings I'd like to be alerted to. Present company excepted, of course, but once the door is open . . . A fond memory from the early nineties was a newsreader program I had that would troll the newsgroups I was interested in. No matter that it took many minutes to download a single image, as it churned away while I was at work. Always a treat to come home in the evening and check out the day's harvest.

I was looking for a Warner Brothers cartoon! Pretty sure there's one where the thing actually wobbles from side to side. Also delighted to launch the Neujahr with an OP who never grouses about a hijack. Not unlike von Braun's take on rockets. "Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down? That's not my department", says Wernher von Braun.

Fearing Wotan has gone deaf, Madam Uvula sends one to the rafters

I learned that, just when you think OZ's past can't get any more colorful, it does.

I've stayed at that place! Instead of a mint, they leave a bedbug on your pillow.

I'm sure I'll feel silly for asking, but what exactly are they searching for?

That way to the urinals

Hard to fool you good folks! OK, Guys, here's your presents! Made in China My Secret Santa gave me one last year and, once I got the hang of the thing, I couldn't figure how I ever got along without it!

Last hint before Christmas: AdamSmith's present is Asian, and MsGuy's is from here. And the first time they try it, they may walk a little funny.

OK, here's another hint: One's bigger than the other. Quite a bit actually. And it's uncut.

How 'bout you guys make a list of who can stay and who should go? If you can get the place back on its feet, I sure wouldn't mind taking a hiatus for a while. Hell, once OZ sees the numbers revive, he'll probably make it permanent.

It's been a puzzle figuring out what to get folks who have everything, like AdamSmith and MsGuy. Then it finally hit me! I won't say exactly what until Christmas Day, but I can tell you it's something I bet they'll both like. And they'll each get a different color. That's enough hints for today.

That's the wurst card this year!

What a splendid reminder! We shall get started at once. You have captured the very essence of egomania. . . If only I could match your exquisite negativity!

To Wayout's most excellent list, I'll add one more reason people might not come to the defense of someone in a flame war on an anonymous website: It's ineffective at best, and incendiary at worst. In a decade of infesting these sites, I've never once seen a response to a troublemaker, directly or indirectly, bring anything but more trouble. The only thing I've ever seen work is complete indifference to the miscreant. There's just nothing worse for someone looking to stir the pot than to find the pot completely empty. So I find it a bit puzzling that folks still think the way to end a flame war is to add a few more flames, if not their own then some borrowed from a so-called defender. If someone can link to a single thread where that approach has worked, I'll gladly admit the error of my ways. I can find threads, lots of them, where someone who's been attacked turns around and attacks the attacker. That's fine, but it serves a different purpose from bringing an end to the conflict. It may make the counter-attacker feel more powerful, it may release some testosterone, and it may provide some entertainment for those who enjoy a train wreck. But it won't end the kerfuffle. Not permanently, anyway, though it will for the duration of the inevitable time out. Personally, if someone gets a kick out of prolonging a state of war on a website, I'm not about to get in his way. In my earlier days, I tried suggesting disengagement as a way to end the hostilities, but I can't think of a single case when the advice was taken. So, rather than turn into a nudge, I figure benign bemusement remains my best bet.

I've always enjoyed Martha Stewart and can't think of anyone else who would tackle a gingerbread Downton. Gum paste aside, it was fun to fantasize foraging the facade from foyer to finials. That is, until I read that she attached the latter with wire. Feh! Julia Child sure wouldn't have done it. I've been through The Joy of Cooking cover-to-cover and never saw 'wire' listed as an ingredient. Wine, certainly. Even woodchuck. But not wire. Definitely glad I didn't follow up on my initial impulse to ask la Stewart to whip up a mouthwatering meringue of Jimmy the Footman, complete with a luscious lobber. Lord knows what she'd have done with that.

No doubt Cuba will see some gains from closer relations with the U. S. But I think it stands to lose some things too, if it can't resist development pressure. . . . 22 percent of Cuba’s land is under some form of protection. The percentage of safeguarded environment in Cuba is among the highest of any nation, says Kenton Miller, chairman of the Switzerland-based World Commission on Protected Areas. As wildlife and habitat have disappeared from the region, Cuba’s importance as an ecological bastion has steadily risen. As one scientist put it, Cuba is the “biological superpower” of the Caribbean. The island has the largest tracts of untouched rain forest, unspoiled reefs and intact wetlands in the Caribbean islands. Cuba also is home to many unique, or endemic, species, including the solenodon, a chubby insectivore that looks rather like a giant shrew, and the bee hummingbird, the world’s smallest bird, weighing less than a penny. But the places where nature is pristine now are most likely the places where folks will want their air conditioned hotels. The Cubans seem like strong people and I hope they can resist getting bowled over by money.