Londoner

A trial period is essential. At least six months, preferably more. I considered it sixteen years ago when the pound was worth 73 bht. I'm pleased I remained in London and continued to travel for holidays, grateful that I could afford to do so. Returning to your question, one of the major issues for me was exactly what you mentioned. I only knew one expat (he has since died) and, to be blunt, the posts I read on a gay forum (not this one) suggested that I'd never fit in. Some of the attitudes were genuinely appalling to someone who has lived in a liberal, multi-cultural city all his life. I appreciate that this was not true of others but feared that expat life may not be for me. So you are right to take into account what sort of social life you'd have in Pattaya, as well as obvious things like finance, weather, health and the political situation, remembering that if you sell-up at home, you may find it financially problematical to return if things don't turn -out well.

But what about flights into the US?

A wise comment. How many of the world's population can afford to support someone in a foreign country? how many here in the UK? I've sent a lot of money over the past fifteen plus years; never have I had to make serious personal sacrifices in terms of my own comfort. I count myself lucky, particularly n view of the happiness P brings me, even in a twenty minute LINE call. Of course, he would propose the Buddhist view that in fact, he is doing me a favour by allowing me to "make merit"....or something like that!

My boyfriend lives 40km from Kamphaeng Phaet in a very rural location. He has been maintaining social distancing assiduously and doesn't downplay the significance and perils of what's happening. However, his local area's stats for infections and deaths ( assuming that official figures are correct and we can't be sure of that) indicate that there have, so far, been few cases. He was recently in hospital after a snake-bite and saw no signs of a serious pandemic. ....I know, this is just anecdotal. His reading of the situation is that restrictions will, to some degree , be lifted shortly. Perhaps not in Bangkok, of course. And once that starts happening, the tourism industry will be clamouring for the return of its customers. Wishful thinking? perhaps....we are missing our May/June trip and want to meet up in three or four months.

I force myself to be optimistic. Much of Thailand has not been hit hard and the government will be determined to lift restrictions as soon as possible. Tourism is too important to be ignored and spoon is correct; a two week quarantine ensures that tourists don't come. The hotels will be banging on the government's door to ensure that the borders are open as soon as possible and the flow of tourists turned back on. I don't think Travellerdave should give-up on September.

Separation is hard for all of us but it is has always been part of human life; think of the families kept apart by war or by the demands of work. In these circumstances, we must accept that those we love may well depend on us and to continue to support them. And it's easier for us to do so now that we are globally connected. When I first met P seventeen years ago , it was much harder....even mobile phones weren't always available. I bought him his first one in Tuc Com, then only a quarter of the size it it is now. Now we can talk anytime we like by phone or on LINE. So I'm grateful, even if sometimes I feel sad when we finish our conversation. On a positive note, I'm confident that in four so months we shall be together with our loved ones.

The correct Trumpian term for non-believers is "libtards." I should know; I am one.

Yes, the "old" Babylon provided an experience far better than we can expect today. Admittedly, I never worked-out how to progress from one floor to another due to its odd room and staircase arrangements but, as PeterRS suggested, there were more opportunities for us to meet with cute and willing guys. I also liked the roof-top bar with its views over Bangkok. Of course, it helped being fifty rather than seventy!

Following z909's post, I wish I'd added the fact that I'd already been to Pattaya three or four times where I experienced that same thrill of seeing cute guys who were available ...for a pittance. In fact, apart from Babylon, I was eager to get the bus to Pattaya where there were more of my type available. Not only that, but I was staying at a gay hotel (LeCafe Royale) where assignations were expected. In Bangkok, I'd used scuzzy short-time rooms because I didn't want to take visitors to my 4* hotel.

My first, obviously! May 1997. Dinner in Sphinx (probably squid salad and chicken with cashew nuts because that's always my favourite), a companion from Khun Cigar (sic), near Tantawan. And the next day, my first trip to Babylon which was then in its old premises .

It's good to talk about love sometimes. I know that I'm not the only one on this forum who is in a relationship and, at this difficult time, is finding it particularly hard to be so far away. And so, here's my contribution. One idiom that P always appreciates....come to think of it, it's about the only time I'm allowed to use my execrable Thai....is "Rak khun tao fah". I love you like the sky. Try it on your boyfriends. I find that it always brings a smile.

Boy69's post made me think. In our sixteen year relationship, P has only told me he loves me about twice. Many years ago, I once asked him why. After all, I often say that I love him. At this he smiled and then became coy. And then he said words to the effect that "it's not the Thai way to say it. You know what what's in my heart." I no longer expect it.

Yes....not that expensive by western standards . And, as Boy69 siad, send him the money through Western Union. Good luck.

I understand but at least you have a partner with whom you can share difficult times. I am thousands of miles away from mine, with no chance of seeing him for months. And anyway, for many people in our age group, isolation has its own problems when it comes to mental health issues like loneliness. Some are desperate for company.

I suspect that the virus spreads more quickly in cities. Perhaps the high number of Thais who live in rural areas may limit its spread. I write this for my own benefit because I'm trying to find something optimistic to say about P, who lives in rural Kamphaeng Phaet and whose relative isolation has bothered me. Until now.

The question isn't whether the bars will close-that was inevitable- but how many will ever re-open. Think of Sunee and the remnants of Boyztown....not many customers to lose there even before the virus arrived. Does anyone currently in Thailand have any idea of the levels of hotel occupancy? or of tourist arrivals?

z909 identifies the crucial issue for Thai saunas; us. There are simply too many aging falangs for the small number of cute , youngish (under 40s in my estimation) who frequent them. And yes, the problem is the cost of entry. I can never understand why under twenty-fives don't get in for 50 bht and ,as z909, a tiered fee after that. The young aren't there at the moment so what's to be lost? and, of course, the more twinks, the more high-paying falang. The best day I had at Babylon was about five years ago when the swimming pool was being renovated. A 50% reduction in cost resulted in far more younger guys. And far more enjoyment for me.

Yes indeed, allegedly owned by policemen, closed by.....? And ten (?) years on, the site still stands, rotting slowly away. No takers , it seems.

Babylon has the advantage of being open in the afternoons, unlike others which tend to open at about 1700. Asian guys (local and visiting) who like falangs are more likely to go there rather than elsewhere. In the present circumstances, I'd go in hope rather than expectation.

My preference is for reception to hold ID cards of visitors having first checked age and validity. That doesn't mean that joiners are "bothered"; in my experience they expect this process.. I also appreciate the phone call from reception when he leaves, checking that all is OK.

Wais are usually best avoided by falangs. They are more complicated than they appear....schools even had competitions to find the best exponent, wth the winners going on to local finals. Perhaps they still do. There's only one way to find out what you should do; ask your boy-friend what he wants. P taught me the correct position of the hands when I met Mama and Papa for the first time but they were relatively elderly country people with traditional views. I'd never wai-ed anyone before and have never done so since.

It looks very nice ....you are fortunate to be able to afford it.

Internet excellent when I was there in January. It appeared to involve new routers. Improved beds are welcome too. The breakfast is the best we've had in Thailand...much better than in a couple of significantly more expensive hotels in Phuket and Krabi we've recently visited. Agoda price was well below 2000 pn. Location unbeatable.

Yes....very pleasant rooms, reasonably priced. The minus is the location but guests with their own transport may not mind.

I visited Pattaya on more than forty occasion enjoying the butterfly-life. And then unexpectedly, unwillingly and against what I thought to be my better judgement, I fell in love with a guy I'd been offing regularly, but certainly not exclusively, for a year. That was in 2004. I am now pretty certain that, had I not done so, I'd no longer be such a regular (three times a year) visitor. Our needs change as we age. Or at least, mine did.