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I’ve found that worrying about how you’re relationship is perceived by others Is wasted time and energy. It’s the relationship that you have with the guy in question is what matters. If both of you are comfortable being seen in each other’s company, what others think shouldn’t be an issue. But if either of you are apprehensive, you’re allowing others to dictate how you feel. I go to any place, eat in any place with the most important person in my life and neither of us gives a thought to what others are thinking. This didn’t happen overnight. But once mutual trust is established, other considerations fade away. The happiness I experience far exceeds anything I’ve known in the past. I’m well into my 70’s. If I don’t experience freedom now, when will I feel entitled.

I hope you realise that paticular journey is crashingly boring! A very good friend who adores trains and train journeys did it. Said it was a total waste of time and money. I've travelled around Europe by train and enjoyed amost all the trips. I've also treated myself to two non-European extravagant train trips. First was the two day Rocky Mountaineer from Vancouver across the Rockies to Banff. The Gold Leaf service with Panorama cars up top and dining underneath was magnificent. Meals were delicious and beautifully served. Passengers don't stay overnight on board. Instead we were put up in a hotel in Kamloops. Sometimes you never believe your luck. I put on an app the fact that I'd be in Kamloops for one night. Extraordinary! One young Chinese gay guy who lived there saw it and came over for dinner and afters. On my visit to Peru three years later I treated myself on the journey from Cusco to Machu Picchu by taking the Hiram Bingham train. This is more or less the equivalent of the Orient Express or the one that plies between Singapore and Bangkok - although much shorter. Fantastic experience! It leaves later than the other trains. Mimosas served before embarkation. Full a la carte breakfast in the dining car. Snacks in the open car at the back. Also last train to leave in the late afternoon, preceded by a proper afternoon tea at the hotel by the entrance to the site. Four course a la carte dinner with wines and then a jazz band playing in the back car. Extravagant? Sure - but one of the little luxuries that help make life exciting! I found Cusco one of the most fascinating cities I have visited. I'm sure most of us know the city's flag is the rainbow flag. The sense of history is stunning. Now I wish I'd spent more than 3 nights there. Were I to return, I'd love to explore more of the other valleys near Cusco.

My 24 trips covered all month with exception of Jan to Apr period and July and honestly I can,t say I have any preference of timing and that I see much difference between high and low seasons. My decision when to go are based on money available , cheap flight and work requirements and have noting to do with those "seasons" For me high season is when I,m there and Low is when I m longing to be there.

Today I went and had a look at all gay massage places in Saphan Khwai and Inthamara. M15 shares boys with 27M, and Inthra Massage with Home Spa. The others (GBeat, K Man Spa, KK Massage = former K-Why) seem to be independent.

I salute your optimism @young11 but I feel you will have to increase your budget. An attractive, fit young man, such as you desire, may well charge 2-3x your suggested rate.

Just hope to pick up old routine as pre 2020: in the there cool season (which also happens to be the cold wintertime here in EUR): go twice, for some 6-8 weeks (perhaps with some intermittent short visit to nearby other ASEAN- so to avoid need to get visa), still struggling now to find acceptable airfare for jan. and then end of year again-then hope to be able to again witness Loy Kratong. And hopefully without even the slightest hints of that covid or masks or the like. This year/early spring went to ESpana for a few weeks but for me THailand does remain the best choice. Just stay in BKK and amuse myself-mostly out of the Silom ghetto.

Many can be seen/found on the usual free poh-channels. Like xvideos or xhamster. Yes, I write becse I do indeed have a very firm fave for TH-and after some doubts it was disclosed he is Thai (from Chinese descent of course): Kuay super. Not the most handsome man, and with 3 cockrings and a real firm top. UNtill no some 10/12 about hourlong stories, with about 2 regular partners. All done in beautiful houses-some in antique restored Phuket housing. The non-tattoo younger friend he got later is very, very appealing. As you may know I am just an awful amateur in giving links etc and all that. MOst are on xhamster, they seem to also get exposed on other as onlyfans lines. Search for ´Phuket massage´ and I guess you will probably hit one-then its easy to find the others. Some, but it seems less, are on xvideos and boyfriendtv. And probably also on other channels I never watch

Agate serving breakfasts now since they stop doing it at the Covid times?

I have not subscribed to any OnlyFans. Some look promising, but whatever previews they post elsewhere, or whatever leaks, I find fault with something and would not pay. There is an extensive post with many links here: https://sawatdeenetwork.com/v4/showthread.php?22918-Post-pandemic-porn

Yes, I confirm that....but I think it may be a drinks cooler rather than a fridge. In other words, no freezing compartment.

Yes indeed. I was fifty-five when I met P. Looking back, I think I was ready then, after nine years of trawling the bars- very happily, I have to say- I needed something different. Nevertheless, I was certainly not looking for a LTR; I was happy with being a butterfly. It just happened. Phoenixblue's comment struck a chord. One of my oldest friends, sadly now deceased, was an Evangelical Christian with very conservative views on "Biblical Christianity." We never discussed sex. However, a few years after I'd met P, I decided that I wasn't going to conceal from anybody that I now had a partner, even him, and showed him a video which a friend had made of P and me sitting in his room. I wondered what the reaction would be. "We all need love, " he said , "and must take it where we can find it." I was surprised and gratified and looked at him with new eyes. He died single.

Had it been a few years later it might have been Cocktail Boyz 1 by Nicky Stewart. Sorry don't know any others from earlier. Crystal Boys is the famous book about growing up gay in 1970s Taipei. A fascinating book and a look back into what life was like in the bad old days! It has been made into a TV series.

"Bangkok Boy" by Chai Pinit. The memoires (as told to....) of a guy older posters may remember from Soi Twilight. Published by Maverick House.

Not yet but certainly feeling like that old. Yes I still work out of greed more than necessity but job is flexible

Please take it from me that at 51 you have tons of time to find one or more relationships. I have had two serious long-term relationships since i was that age. Naturally people define long term differently. In my case I put the minimum time down as 5 years. Others will certainly be considerably longer. I have friends who just celebrated 50 years together and others 35 years. Neither started with sex. The former started through a work engagement; the latter through a friend's introduction. I see no reason why a search for a partner and short term sexcapades cannot co-exist until a partner is found. I just happen to believe that short term sex is highly unlikely - though not impossible - to result in a long-term partnership. Since you crave companionship. is it not much more likely that you will find it nearer your own home? A long distance relationship, as I have written elswhere, can be fraught with difficulties and fears. My only other suggestion is that companionship means being with your partner very regularly. It also requires a considerable amount of give and take, and the older one gets and the more set in ones ways, the more difficult that can sometimes become.

Life is a balance of simplicity and complexity and the way to be happy is to strike the right balance. I like Thailand because, in my opinion, it is relatively simple, more relaxed and easy going. Best wishes 🌹

I've never been to any of the saunas so I'm afraid I can't help you there. And I haven't been back since the recent reopening so I can't add anything related to that. You might try something like Flyertalk.com to get the lowdown on current entry requirements. I enjoyed Kaohsiung on my last trip. That was 3 years ago. There's not nearly as much to do as Taipei but it's a nice little city. I think Tainan is more interesting from a historical perspective. If you're asking about gay fun I can't help you there either as I was recovering from being sick pretty much the whole time I was there. I stayed at the Indigo hotel though which I thoroughly enjoyed. Great service, big room, gorgeous bathroom with a shower big enough for at least 3 or 4 people. Nice location across the street from central park and the subway.

Win is cute 🙂

My massage spa experiences have almost always been positive. I think there was only one place where I didn't have the happy ending I wanted and that was the first one I visited. It was one of the big ones Royal something maybe... Very handsome hunky guys, but the one I chose would only go down to his underwear and didn't do any real hanky panky. Otherwise the others I have been to always had at least a handjob ending. Most would do a body to body type of thing at the end which I always enjoy. I mentioned Mudan spa above. It's a bit of an outlier in that you go to a fairly upscale condo building where your masseur meets you outside and takes you up to the condo where they have a massage table set up. It looked like some one actually lived there so I'm not certain about how many units they might have available. The masseur I had didn't speak much English but we used Google translate when necessary. He was quite interactive and very sweet. I really wanted to go back again before i left town but I got a cold in the meantime. Lots of hot guys listed in their staff who I would like to meet some time. Other spas around town I have visited are more of what you expect from a spa as far as the set up and layout are concerned. Certainly a bit more expensive than Bangkok but I still thought it was reasonable.

We have stayed many times at the agate and always had a fridge in the room

I have occasionally looked at the Blowing Wind Travel forum. I have never had a massage in Taipei but it is from that site I see that afters are basically HJs only. I have not seen any report about full service following the massage. Also most of the masseurs will not speak more than a few words of English.

I'm not into girlish guys that's why I like Filipino boys more , I like them aggressive type ready to slap my ass and fuck me like a bitch

Two of the boys in photo, Win(black shirt), second from left and Jay (white shirt), third from left were on stage during my visit. Possibly the lad on the far right was there but cannot be sure.

I agree with you. I went a step further - I want to a lamination shop (photo copy store) in Pattaya and they took my passport and copied both the ID page as well as the VISA stamp page. So, the end result is a laminated ID card with my passport photo ID on one side and my VISA stamp on the other side. I had 2 of them made (one as a backup) and I walk around with one of these and the actual passport stays in my room safe. They made it into the side of a credit card - so it fits perfectly into your pocket and/or wallet without having to bend it.

If only it was that simple as Peter elaborated above.

Via an applications….

That is very kind, thank you. Would that were so. Sadly words are mere words and if someone really does not want to hear them, nothing will change their behaviour. An addict is an addict. Equally sadly most will not accept this is so. Almost all, I am told, believe they can control their addiction when in fact it is the addiction that controls them. The death last night of 34 year old rapper Aaron Carter is just another example. He was such a cute singer/actor in his late teens/20s but he had been treated several times for a variety of addictions. His family had begged him to change and he always promised he would. But his demons would not allow it. Some of us will remember Andy Gibb, the wonderfully cute singing sensation brother of the Bee Gees. Although he died in 1988 aged 30 of a heart infection, we know this was a result of years of drug and alcohol abuse. Again, the demons felt nothing for the moral support. I understand your thoughts and there have been times I have agreed with you. I have alternated between period of being in love and being the butterfly. I loved both, even though breakups from someone you truly love can be so hard. The important point is that sex is not love. It is more like a momentary high. But sex not an either/or. Not sure of your age, but I have found that age changed my views more in favour of having someone in my life.

The way I see it is that life is too short to live without love, sounds cheesy but over the years I have come to realize the importance of having somebody in your life to relate to. Every year I promise to settle down but life gets in the way. Is it worth investing in love when sex is readily available? even if it's a brief gratification which requires taking antivirals and antibodies so you won't feel afraid of contracting something. To think Covid is scary when your memory goes back to the plague that started in the 80s.... Be well everybody 🙏🌹

I'm a regular visitor to Taipei, usually 4 times a year pre-covid. Back next week for 16 days. For sauna, @hojacat is 100% correct. The only one worth visiting is Soi13in. Unlike @fedssocr, I find travelgayasia frequently disappointing and often inaccurate. For Soi13in it states it used to be called Rainbow. That's just not true. There was never a sauna in that location before. Rainbow was certainly a large sauna but the Taiwan guys who went there had an 'attitude' and foreigners were not always welcomed by other patrons. It was in a very different part of the city much closer to The Red House and closed several years ago. I believe the owners then opened Soi13in but the two are like chalk and cheese. Many twinks and many bottoms there. Take your own condoms and lube. There are other smaller saunas but frankly you could spend hours looking for them. For one night, just go to Soi13in. The easiest way to get there is the subway to Shuanglian on the Red Line (direction Tamshui), turn north-east out of the station and walk to the main road. Take the underpass, keep walking straight ahead and you will soon see it on your left as when you come to a left fork in the road. Never had a massage but I read on other forums that happy endings are not always possible and often are restricted to HJs. Best to check espeically if you want full service. The Red House is rather like gay central but forget about there being clubs there. It is almost entirely cafes, bars and restaurants. Great for eye candy especially on Friday and Saturday evenings. Easy to get to by subway - exit 1 at Ximen station. There are no gogos similar to those you will find in Thailand. There is one leather bar not far from The Red House called Commander D. Basically a leather fetish bar it is not to be confused with Commander Bar which is on the upper level at The Red House. Commander is basically just a bar. Commander D is located in a small basement in a residential area. Leather is not essential. It has special theme evenings which will often see a degree of nudity from the patrons. It also has a small stage and a dark room. But that is totally dark and so make sure you have no valuables on you if you enter. Getting around is easy IF you know where you are going. The subway is extensive and cheap. Taiwan gay guys are some of the loveliest and friendliest in Asia. But please be polite. Remember too that many gay guys go out with friends rather than solo and so in the bars it is sometimes less easy to find guys looking to meet up with a westerner. That's where the apps come are more useful. Change your photo and profile to taipei a few days before you arrive. Also remember that Blued is very popular in Taiwan. Money boys are not usual on the apps. Mostly it is younger Taiwan guys looking to spend time with westerners. MBs will usually tell you very soon after you start chatting. If you offer money to a non MB, it's possible this will might be regarded as an insult.

My plans Stay alive and healthy Travel to Thailand, Singapore and or Vietnam Win lotto and move to either of the 3 above mentioned countries

My favorite in Bangkok is the Raya hotel on Surawong road. My favorite in the Jomtien Complex is Agate. Consider having dinner in Poseidon, as the chef is great.

I don't think it is "officially", but more like "usually". Early February usually is, but as February wears on the number of high season tourists wears off. Just what kind of high season there will be this year remains to be seen, but for several years even before anyone ever heard of Covid, the tourist numbers dropped off to the point that I could no longer tell much difference between high season and low season. I'm keeping my fingers crossed because I believe this upcoming high season is crucial to what will become of the Thailand gay scene, especially in Pattaya. If it is a really good high season, I think we will see more go-go bars opening and reopening and more boys working in them. If the high season is a bust, then I believe the best we can hope for any time soon will be status quo. So gents, if you wish to help save Thailand's gay bar scene, during high season pack your bags and get thee to Thailand - and bring plenty of money . . .

You've probably read other posts here about Medellin, but that's what I'd suggest. I have not been to Lima, but from what I read here, there are drawbacks. Medellin was sex paradise, if that's what you're looking for. Many available men - some free, some for pay. Good restaurants, clubs and saunas (I didn't visit any) and friendly people. Mexico City, Lima and Pattaya all probably have better food - Colombian food is pretty basic meat and potatoes - but the men in Colombia were among the hottest I've ever encountered on my travels. And the weather is also perfect - eternal spring.

before, during or after massage ?

Why didn't you give him a second chance? Probably this time, his grandma would call

Individuals dying as a result of drugs, crashing their motorcys after driving drunk and too fast, even by suicide is very difficult for others to control. Even those who see the signs of alcohol, drug, gambling and other addictions find it all but impossible to help. The individual has to want help - and in too many cases deep down they don't. For most, there is some deep rooted mental issue. Thankfully, for those who do want treatment, there are many more facilities now than there used to be. At university, I knew a beautiful felllow student. Her beauty was almost luminous. She was very slim and none of us were aware at the time that she suffered from bulimia. She never talked about it. Given that this was many decades ago, few actually knew much about it, not even the medical profession. She obviously was aware there was something wrong with her. Whether she did anything to obtain treatment, none of us ever found out. Had she done so, it is highly unlikely she would have been offered any sensible and practical advice. One day, she threw herself in front of a lorry in the middle of the city. She survived and was sent to a hospital for the mentally ill. For whatever reason, she was placed in a ward on the second floor. A few weeks after being admitted, she threw herself out of the window. This time she succeeded in her desire to die. The lorry driver, a man in his early 50s with a wife and family, was less lucky. He suffered a heart attack after knocking the girl down. He died a few days later.

I lost two lovers as a result of AIDS. I had been madly in love with the first, a Japanese, and we had talked about living together. But because we were then living almost 1,800 miles apart, even though we were meeting almost every month and took holidays together, I suppose it was inevitable that he would meet someone else. In my early 30s, I could not understand how any young Japanese (he was 25) could possibly leave me for a man more than double his age - he was 52(!) I did learn later he wanted stability and eventually to start a business. His new partner gave him both. He did write to me to say what had happened and how sorry he was that he had hurt me. At the time it was no consolation. Although it took me many months to get over the anger and to a certain extent the betrayal I felt, I eventually realised it was as much my fault. It was the early 1980s was I still quite new to Asia and certainly to Japan. A few years later he called me and asked if we could meet again. He wanted my help re part of his little business. We had a joyful reunion dinner and became good friends. FIve years after we had split up, when having tea he told me he had been feeling well. He and his bf were leaving for a long summer in London when he would seek treatment if he did not get better. Two months later, I got a call from his partner whom I had never even spoken to before. My first lover had died of AIDS. I flew over for the funeral. Looking back, it seems odd that I had no worries about being infected. Perhaps I was in denial with HIV/AIDS being a death sentence. We had never used condoms, but then when we were together we knew very little about HIV. Thereafter I always used them. In the early 1990s I met a tall Thai student in, of all places, Babylon. Having had part of his education in Australia, he spoke fluent English with a slight Ozzie accent. Over the next year or so we were to meet frequently, each time becoming more besotted with each other. I even seriously thought of moving to Bangkok just to be with him. But he wanted to leave Bangkok as he felt too confined here after the freedom he'd enjoyed in Sydney. He was desperate to live with me in Hong Kong. I knew - and told him many times - that he and we would face many obstacles there, far more than in Thailand. He could not continue his studies, without an HK ID card he would be unable to find a decent job - and so on. But he was adamant. Stupidly I gave in. Although we did lots of things together and I loved having him live with me, it was obvious he was beginning to regret his decision. Just before Christmas we went to Australia for 10 days as I had a couple of days business. With frequent absences from our hotel, I knew he'd been meeting old friends and perhaps returning to some of his old gay haunts. After quite a bitter argument one evening, he told me he would not come back to Hong Kong. He planned to stay with an old flame in Sydney. And that is what he did. This time I realised I had made the wrong decision and for months I regretted it. What I should have been aware of was that the freedom he had enjoyed before I met him in Babylon had included quite a bit of unprotected sex. After he became sick, he returned to his Kanchanaburi home where died of AIDS two years later. But again i did not get myself tested. Finally on a trip to Phuket with friends, I went to a clinic and after three days learned I was negative. Yet despite all the bad feelings, I was later to put these totally behind me and as @Mavica pointed out earlier, just remember all the wonderful times we had enjoyed. Despite the sorrow at relationships coming to an abrupt end and of young lives being cut far too short, I am surprised that these memories do not fade.